Adeptus Ridiculous

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Warhammer 40k became close to what we recognize it is today around third edition - before that, it was The Rogue Trader: Warhammer 40000, a pulp fiction mishmash of Judge Dredd, Alien, and Dune... Even more than it is today. In this episode we return to the olden days and take a look at the world of 40k where space marines all behave like Night Lords, Primarch is just a title you can be promoted to, Emperor is some normal guy who was born to human parents and was afraid of dying so he put himself into the jar,  Roboute Guilliman is a pile of dusty bones on a shelf in Macragge, Orks get laid, and Rogal Dorn poops on the floor. Left without much options we also touch on the scariest of topic all: Ian Watson.

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In a press release, Focus Entertainment publishing deputy CEO John Bert said, “We have been honored by the incredible response from fans following the launch of Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine II. We will continue to support the game with exciting content and regular updates in the coming years. Today, we are thrilled to announce that the adventure will continue with Space Marine III. Players can look forward to an immersive campaign, a multiplayer mode, and innovations that will redefine the standards of third-person action games. Developed in close collaboration with Games Workshop, Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine III will take the genre to new heights by introducing large-scale battles that are even more spectacular.”

Nobody knows whats going to be in it aside from shooting guns i guess but lets speculate because that's what content monkeys like us do. MAYBE IT WILL BE A DATING SIM?!?!!

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A shroud of darkness blankets the world. Smoke and brimstone spews from the yawning gates of Inferno, enveloping the lands where people have abandoned God and openly wage war against His Creation. It is a grim reality that a full third of humanity has bent its knee before the idols of Hell. The main military force of Satan on Earth is the Heretic Legions, raised from amongst these citizens of the damned.

Though the vast bulk of the Heretic Legions are made of mortal humans, Hell often sends their own abhorrent progeny to reinforce their mortal foot soldiers: nightmarish War Beasts made of captured and possessed creatures and dreaded Artillery Witches who act as mobile artillery supporting lighting assaults. Thus, in this accursed theatre of war, mortals and abominations march hand in withering hand, bound by the suffering ties of damnation. The wails of tortured beasts meld with the shrieks of damned souls, while the skies rain down fiery retribution upon all who dare to oppose the Heretics’ ceaseless crusade for a demented parity with their Creator.

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Malcador the Sigillite, also known as Malcador the Hero by decree of the Emperor of Mankind, was the powerful psyker and scholar who served as the Imperial Regent when the Emperor was away from Terra or otherwise engaged and also as the first Grand Master of Assassins during the Great Crusade and the Horus Heresy eras.

By the dawn of the 31st Millennium, Malcador was over 6,700 standard years old and could remember his date of birth to the second. His title of "Sigillite", meaning "seal-bearer" in an ancient Terran language, was a measure of the esteem and trust the Emperor had in Malcador, for he was empowered to speak and act in the Emperor's stead with the Emperor's full authority wherever he went.

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The Vampire Counts are amongst the most legendary factions of Vampires to have ever terrorized the civilized lands of the Old World, all of whom are members of the unholy von Carstein bloodline. The government, nobility and the patriotic citizenry of the Empire consider the Vampire Counts to be fiends without equal. They seek only to topple the civilizations of the living and supplant them with an empire of the Undead that will reign forever as Lords of the Night.

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Within the Imperium, entire worlds are devoted to the pursuit of agriculture and the growing of food, providing the necessary sustenance for the people of more specialised worlds elsewhere in the galaxy. These so-called Agri-worlds can grow a variety of food in many different ways, from the ill-tempered livestock known as Grox that provide meat to so many across the galaxy to simple wheat for bread.

On some Agri-worlds, entire continents have been cultivated for the growth of foodstuffs. The most standard type of food grown on most Agri-worlds and distributed to feed the peoples of the Imperium is processed corn. This variety can produce confusion when Imperial cultures mix; in one recorded instance, Tona Criid, a native of Vervunhive on Verghast, mistook camouflage paint for a type of food-paste supplied to the 1st Tanith Regiment.

Space Marines have been known to subsist on triglyceride gel and amino-porridge, as well as local wildlife hunted during their deployments. Some Chapters of the Adeptus Astartes have their own particular diets. The Dark Angels, for instance, are known to consume nutrigruel, carboloafs and vitamead. 

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The Nachmund Rift War is an ongoing conflict being waged by the Imperium in the Nachmund Sub-Sector.

Closely connected to the War of Beasts and War of Nightmares on Vigilus, while the Fortress World itself continues to remain largely in Imperial hands the greater Nachmund Gauntlet finds itself besieged by the Forces of Chaos. 

Vigilus is a world situated within the Nachmund Gauntlet and one of the few passages through the Great Rift. As such, the planet has become strategically vital for the Imperium and has become a target for a wide number of its enemies.

As part of the greater War of Beasts, Sangua Terra is under Chaos assault as Abaddon the Despoiler seeks to destroy both it and Vigilus to close the Nachmund Gauntlet. At least 2 companies of the Castellans of the Rift Chapter are fighting on the world. During the Nachmund Rift War, the planet became the linchpin of the new Imperial defensive network dubbed the Sanctus Wall.

Due to successive Chaos invasions, Sangua Terra is presently a battle-scarred hellscape overrun by Daemons. Canoness Superior Junith Eruita has arrived on the planet to marshal its defenders.

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 https://www.patreon.com/AdeptusRidiculous https://www.adeptusridiculous.com/ https://twitter.com/AdRidiculous https://orchideight.com/collections/adeptus-ridiculous Having recovered from his grievous injuries, Warmaster Horus leads the triumphant Imperial forces against the rebel world of Isstvan III. Though the rebels are swiftly crushed, Horus's treachery is finally revealed when the planet is razed by virus bombs and Space Marines turn on their battle-brothers in the most bitter struggle imaginable. Truly, he is the Warhammer Forty Thousands. 

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Trailer for new 40k show ASTARTES 2 came out recently and it was pretty good. We aren't really into doing the whole soyjak pointing reaction videos, but trailer actually contained a lot of cool stuff and showed off quite a few obscure space marine chapters we want to talk about today with Kirioth: Scythes of the Emperor, Sons of Medusa, Retributors, Angels Vermillion and Mortifactors.

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A Techmarine (known as a Frater Astrotechnicus in High Gothic) is a Firstborn or Primaris Space Marine technician and engineer as well as a full Astartes battle-brother of his Chapter. They are fully initiated members of both the Cult Mechanicus and their Chapter.

Prospective Techmarines are chosen from the ranks of the Space Marine Chapters for their affinity with technology. They learn how to divine the runes of engineering and study the liturgy of maintenance. This great body of lore must be committed to memory and understood by the novice Techmarine.

They are taught how to "feel" the pain of a damaged machine and heal it. When they come back they serve the same role in their Chapter as a Tech-priest Enginseer in the Astra Militarum. Without the passing on of such ancient lore, the Space Marines would eventually grind to a complete halt, unable to make war. Thus does every Chapter’s might hinge upon the esoteric knowledge of its Techmarines. 

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