On Saturday last weekend I went back to the site of my childhood trauma.

I went back to my boarding school.

It was the first time that I have been back inside the school for 25 years.

Today I offer some reflections for how it was.

How did I find it? Was it really hard? Or was it harder than I was expecting?

I talk about visiting the dining hall, the chapel, the site of the death of my friend, and the old boarding house.

What had changed? And what seemed to still be the same?

I also talk about what I learned about going back. 

To be honest it brought old patterns up for me. What were they and what would I do differently if I went again?

Any questions please do let me know,

Warm regards,

Piers

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Trish Brennan is the CEO & Principal Trainer of Leading Edge Communication. She coaches women who want to have more confidence in their relationships, be more assertive, establish healthy boundaries and radically improve the quality of their lives through enhanced communication and relationship skills. She is also the author of The Straight Talk.

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. What is you clarion call to men and women?
3. Could you tell us a bit about your Boys To Men work?
4. What do you feel is the healing work that men need to do?
5. What is the nature of patriarchal society?
6. Joint responsibility – what can both men and women do?
7. Emotions – what is the importance of men and women connecting to their emotions?
8. “Change should fall on adult men with power.” Jackson Katz
9. How do women crack open the hearts of their men?
10. How do people find out more about your work?

To learn more about Trish's work please visit: www.leadingedgecommunication.com/ www.thestraighttalkblog.com / www.ifthisisabuse.com

Or to buy her book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Straight-Talk-Exactly-Control-Precious/dp/B0C2RF57TB/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=the+straight+talk+trish+brennan&qid=1684166022&sprefix=trish+brenn%2Caps%2C871&sr=8-1 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 Last weekend I returned to London again. 

While I was there I found myself walking past, by synchronicity, my old workplace. 

So I recorded these films... 

I went past old pubs I used to drink in, the office I worked in and the realisation of just how close my old workplace was to the original site of my boarding school. 

I also had the insight that being in the City, the financial sector, was very similar to being at boarding school - we were told not to show our emotions, there was an ethos of overworking and a split between home and work. 

Today I share some of the films I recorded. 

Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

What are the 3 types of trauma? T

Today I talk about attachment trauma. This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma. 

Last week I talked about developmental trauma https://youtu.be/ilTX9M0KExk and the week before that I talked about shock trauma https://youtu.be/xE7EOR_F_qE. 

This week I am talking about attachment trauma. What is it? 

I give some examples of what this type of trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Gabor Mate and from Diane Poole Heller and her book The Power of Attachment. 

I also talk how attachment trauma links into boarding school syndrome and how the breaking of attachment from our homes and our parents to go to boarding school is a trauma. Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 What are the 3 types of trauma? 

Today I talk about developmental trauma. 

This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma. 

Last week I talked about shock trauma. 

This week I am talking about developmental trauma. What is it? 

I give some examples of what this type of trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Nick Duffell and Thurstine Basset in Trauma, Abandonment and Privilege, Prof Joy Schaverien from her 2021 paper called Boarding School Syndrome Revisited and Pete Walker's Complex PTSD. 

I talk about how boarding school syndrome is a developmental trauma.

Next week I will talk about attachment trauma. Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, 

Piers

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I have a fascinating conversation with Shahid Van Helden talking about tantra, sex, porn addiction and intimacy.

He also talks about presence and the three things that we need to do as men to become more present.

He also share some ideas for how we improve our love-making and our sex lives.

A really fascinating conversation.

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Shahid Van Helden is a men's group, men's & couples' retreat and Tantra facilitator. Shahid has also trained in Tantra Massage & Bodywork. He runs couples retreats with his beloved, Shashi Solluna.

Some areas to talk about:

1. I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work you now do?
2. Could you please talk a little about Tantra. What is it?
3. If you are a man who has been through trauma or a dysfunctional upbringing especially regarding sex, how do we start to heal that?
4. It is said in personal development circles that it is women who do most of the inner work. How do we as men step up and start to examine our inner workings?
5. How do we cultivate presence?
6. How can we as men be vulnerable and not collapse?
7. Some men feel that they are not good enough especially regarding sex. What would you advise someone who comes to you with this problem?
8. Dissociation. Through trauma a man comes to you who has dissociated, especially in sex. They're always in their head. What are some of the practices that you teach men to be more embodied?
9. What do you suggest for men who have no ability for intimacy and no perceptible sex drive?
10. How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Shahid's work please visit: https://www.masteringtheartoflove.com/

Or to learn more about his couples work with his partner Shashi Solluna please visit: https://www.thetantriccouple.com/ or https://www.livetantra.com/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

 What are the 3 types of trauma? 

Today I talk about the most well know type trauma. 

This comes from the work of Gabor Mate who is one of the world's leading voices on trauma. 

The first one is shock trauma. 

What is shock trauma? 

I give some examples of what shock trauma is and I also quote some of the words of Bessel Van der Kolk from The Body Keeps the Score and Peter Levine from his book Healing Trauma. 

Next week I will talk about developmental trauma and the week after that about attachment trauma. Any questions please do let me know. 

Warm regards, Piers 

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

“Our vulnerability is our superpower.” These words come from the co-director and executive producer of one of my favourite films, 'The Work'.

The Work is one of the most powerful films I have come across. It has me in tears every time.

What is it? The journey of three men visiting Folsom Prison to attend a four day men's retreat.

What unfolds is so beautiful. Grown men in tears. Some of the toughest men on the planet showing their vulnerability.

If they can do it, so can we. To watch the film please visit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEUHVVAPyTA

He also talks about one of his other films about the Brazilian Jujitsu Master Renzo Gracie called Renzo Gracie: Legacy: https://youtu.be/s3HrHJ_dQl0

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Gethin Aldous is a film and video game maker who believes in the power of story to transform lives. He was co-director and executive producer of The Work documentary, winning a UK Grierson Award for Best International Documentary and Best Cinema Documentary. He has also been honored with a Ron Herring Award by the Mankind Project USA. Gethin has been involved in men's work for over a decade and has staffed group therapy retreats at Folsom Prison with Inside Circles and Massachusetts Correctional Institution at Norfolk with the Jericho Circle. 

Some of the areas to cover:

1.  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2.  How did the film The Work come about?
3.  What for you were some of the gold from filming The Work?
4.  What were some of the challenges?
5.  It is six years since the film came out, what was the response to the film?
6.  How was filming Renzo Gracie: Legacy?
7.  How long did you film for?
8.  What did you learn and what was some of the gold?
9.  What were the challenges of filming this documentary?

To learn more about Gethin's work please visit: https://www.allkings.org/our-team/blog-post-title-one-2aw8j-actp8

• Or his IMDB page: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0017634/?ref_=tt_ov_dr

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Today I wanted to talk about a subject which is very close to my heart - that of mental health and especially with regards to teenagers. 

As a teenager in boarding school I really struggled with my mental health. 

I was suicidal and at the age of 14 one of my friends at boarding school committed suicide. 

It devastated me although I never dared shared my emotion with anyone. That was not allow in boarding school! 

So today I offer some reflections about mental health. 

- Why are our teenagers struggling so much mentally? 
- And what can we do as parents and adults to help? 
- What do psychiatrists like Christopher Palmer from Harvard Medical School say?

Please do share below any practices that you have implemented or use with your children? 

Warm regards, Piers 

#suicideprevention #mentalhealth #teenagementalhealth #childhoodtrauma

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/

Jai Singh is a men's coach and workshop leader who specialises in helping fathers find a deeper sense of purpose in their lives. He also runs a 10 week program for fathers, called The New King.

Some of the areas to cover:

1.  I would love for you to share some of your journey. How did you get into the work that you now do?
2. What are some of the challenges that men face as fathers in today's world?
3. Could you please talk a little about marriage and fatherhood as a crucible for personal growth and evolution?
4. Could you please speak to conscious masculinity in the context of fatherhood?
5. How do we start to create a life of purpose and passion as a father?
6. If you are happy to talk about this I would love to hear your experience of growing up with a father who went to boarding school. How was it?
7.  How do we as men and father deal with being triggered in our roles as Dads?
8.  What is the importance for us to have a relationship with ourselves before we begin having a relationship with our family? How do you help men to do this?
9.  What are some of the practices you get men to do?
10.  What is a healthy King in your eyes. How do we cultivate that as fathers?
11.  How do we shoulder greater responsibility?
12.  How do people learn more about your work or reach out?

To learn more about Jai work's please visit: https://www.awakened-masculine.com

• Call booking page: https://www.awakened-masculine.com/call
• Youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@awakenedmasculine55
• Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/the.awakened.masculine/

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Piers is an author and a men's transformational coach and therapist who works mainly with trauma, boarding school issues, addictions and relationship problems.

He also runs online men's groups for ex-boarders, retreats and a podcast called An Evolving Man.

He is also the author of How to Survive and Thrive in Challenging Times. To purchase Piers first book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/How-Survive-Thrive-Challenging-Times/dp/B088T5L251/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=piers+cross&qid=1609869608&sr=8-1

For more videos please visit: http://youtube.com/pierscross

For FB: https://www.facebook.com/pierscrosspublic

For Piers' website and a free training How To Find Peace In Everyday Life: https://www.piers-cross.com/community

Many blessings,

Piers Cross

http://piers-cross.com/