Answers For Elders Radio Network

As part of National Caregiver Month, Star Bradbury joins Suzanne to continue the discussion about her 2023 book, "Successfully Navigating Your Parents' Senior Years."

Millions of Americans are in an active caregiver role or will be in one in the future, yet few have a solid plan for the inevitable challenges of aging.

Whether your parents are in their 60s or their 90s, and whether they have years of health ahead of them or already need more support, Successfully Navigating Your Parents’ Senior Years provides the framework and information you need to prepare for and handle with confidence the changes to come.

The responsibility of caring for an aging loved one is often daunting—and when trouble hits, the sudden barrage of questions you face can be overwhelming. Have your parents executed their Advance Directives? Do you know what to look for in a senior community (and how to ensure a spot is available when you need it)? If your parents want to stay in their home, what can you do to ensure their safety?

Certified aging life care specialist and CEO of Senior Living Strategies Star Bradbury draws on her 25 years of experience in senior living to bring you an up-to-date, comprehensive guide to navigating the tricky waters ahead—starting with putting a plan in place now that maximizes your parents’ independence while providing them with the support they need.

Learn more: 
* Star Bradbury: https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B0BRT9M6VQ/about
* Successfully Navigating Your Parents' Senior Years on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Successfully-Navigating-Parents-Senior-Years/dp/1637742479
* Google Books preview of the book: https://www.google.com/books/edition/Successfully_Navigating_Your_Parents_Sen/--VxEAAAQBAJ?hl=en&gbpv=1&printsec=frontcover

Hear more:
* Podcasts celebrating caregivers: https://answersforelders.com/category/saluting-caregivers/

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/
Check out our affiliate podcast Alzheimer’s Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

As part of National Caregiver Month, Star Bradbury joins Suzanne to talk about her 2023 book, "Successfully Navigating Your Parents' Senior Years."

Millions of Americans are in an active caregiver role or will be in one in the future, yet few have a solid plan for the inevitable challenges of aging.

Whether your parents are in their 60s or their 90s, and whether they have years of health ahead of them or already need more support, Successfully Navigating Your Parents’ Senior Years provides the framework and information you need to prepare for and handle with confidence the changes to come.

The responsibility of caring for an aging loved one is often daunting—and when trouble hits, the sudden barrage of questions you face can be overwhelming. Have your parents executed their Advance Directives? Do you know what to look for in a senior community (and how to ensure a spot is available when you need it)? If your parents want to stay in their home, what can you do to ensure their safety?

Certified aging life care specialist and CEO of Senior Living Strategies Star Bradbury draws on her 25 years of experience in senior living to bring you an up-to-date, comprehensive guide to navigating the tricky waters ahead—starting with putting a plan in place now that maximizes your parents’ independence while providing them with the support they need.

Learn more: 
* Star Bradbury: https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B0BRT9M6VQ/about
* Successfully Navigating Your Parents' Senior Years on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Successfully-Navigating-Parents-Senior-Years/dp/1637742479
* Google Books preview of the book: https://www.google.com/books/edition/Successfully_Navigating_Your_Parents_Sen/--VxEAAAQBAJ?hl=en&gbpv=1&printsec=frontcover

Hear more:
* Podcasts celebrating caregivers: https://answersforelders.com/category/saluting-caregivers/

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/
Check out our affiliate podcast Alzheimer’s Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Lori La Bey, Alzheimer's Speaks host, joins Suzanne to talk about the Noble Swan, an Answers for Elders initiative to help support family caregivers.

Suzanne explains the metaphor of the noble swan for caregivers. "The most noble thing you can do is care for someone else. I thought about it a long time, and I thought we need some sort of an icon, that every time you see that icon, it would honor that person, that you get it, the life that they live, that you share that with that other person

"A swan glides across the glassy lake, right? You don't see anything else but this graceful beauty of this individual. But what's going on underneath the surface is, these feet are feverishly paddling to get that swan to go to where it's going. I thought that was just this amazing metaphor of a family caregiver. It's that person that is always greeting their loved one with a smile. They always have everything together, even though their life is crazy in the background. They hold all the pieces together, and they do everything they can, with so much nobility and so much grace. And that's why we picked the noble swan.

"We have poems that accompany the Noble Swan and and a very exciting thing starting in November on for National Caregivers Month. We will have a very special bouquet to send to your loved one and in partnership with FTD. So we will learn more about that as we move forward um in November."

Lori adds, "I just think it's going to give people so much comfort. It's going to give the family and friends who want to support a way to support, because they don't always know how. And so it's a step in the door, because sometimes you have family and friends that aren't in the area, they can't physically help. But boy, having a beautiful bouquet of flowers that is specifically for a caregiver, with a beautiful poem attached to it, it's just going to be one of those things you walk by, and it's going to fill your heart every single time, and it's going to be something that people aren't going to forget."

What else can people do to support family caregivers? Lori says, "You know, taking somebody out. It could be a manicure, it could be to a ball game, it could be to a movie. It might just be going out for a walk – cutting grass, it's endless. Just think of all the things that you do personally you could use help with."

Learn more:
Alzheimer's Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Alzheimer's Speaks host Lori La Bey joins Suzanne to talk about what caregivers need most. Lori says they need to be understood, appreciated, supported, not feel alone, and have choice and a voice in how we move forward.

Suzanne described a welcome experience. "I had friends that would ask, how can we help, Suzanne? And I was so overwhelmed, I'd say, 'oh, I'm fine,' or I would do this and I didn't even think about it. After probably like three years into caring for my mom, I had two girlfriends show up at my doorstep, and they said, 'We're the Joy Committee. We've hired a caregiver for you to be there for your mom for the day, and we're gonna take you out, and we're gonna bring joy to your life, and you can feel free to call anytime, do whatever you want if you wanna vent. That was one of the greatest gifts I'd ever been given. And I didn't even think about it at the time. I was too overwhelmed."

Lori says, "I had girlfriends like that too. They didn't come and take me out, but I ended up joining them for coffee every week. I kept pushing away, because I didn't have time. But when I finally did go have coffee — and my intent was to have coffee and then not ask me again, because I just didn't have time for it — I found out how empty my soul was, because I was so busy being busy, and caring for everyone else but myself. I got refilled, and it felt so good. It felt joyful, it felt peaceful. I felt energized, all of those things that I think we overlook so often because we're too busy being busy."

Lori adds, "Sending cards, even, could be a small little thing like that, for a lot of people. I would send a card every week. It would just drop it in the mail. I do like a dozen of them at a time. And they said, boy, it was just nice to get something in the mail. Or calling somebody just to check in to say, 'how are you doing? And I really want to hear how you're doing.' Just somebody to listen, and to understand, and to know that it's ok, no matter what happens."

Learn more:
Alzheimer's Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Lori La Bey, Alzheimer's Speaks host, joins Suzanne. In this segment, Lori asks Suzanne about her experiences as a caregiver and founder of Answers for Elders.

Suzanne says, "I was a family caregiver, taking care of my mother for the last six years of her life. I don't consider myself a stupid human being, but I had no clue what I was dealing with. There was terminology being used. I didn't even know there were caregiving agencies out there that could care for my loved one. There's no school out there that teaches you what you're supposed to know. 

"One of the things that was so stressful for me was, I would wake up in the middle of the night after making a huge decision for my mom that was maybe monumental in certain ways. And I would be laying there wondering if I did the right thing. And that was almost more stressful to me then knowing what my resource were, because I was making decisions believing that I didn't have all the facts. I had what people were telling me, but they didn't know my mother, they didn't know her values. And I needed to feel like I was empowered, and I didn't have that feeling ever. 

"I lost my job due due to caregiving. I was in my early fifties, and I realized really quick, if you're in senior management, you're not gonna get looked at because they'd rather hire the 35 year old that would work for half the salary that I was, at the top of my career, and it was also a recession, 2009. And I made the choice. There was a spiritual teacher that I read a lot of, Emma Curtis Hopkins. I'm paraphrasing, but one of the things Emma says that resonated with me was, if you see a job, it's yours. And I thought, you know what, it is mine. 

"I realized that caregiving is interconnected. There's all different pieces. There's financial, there's legal, there's housing situations, there's care solutions, there's health care that you're juggling, and somehow you have to coexist in a family where sometimes you're feeling resentful, and feeling taken advantage of, and feeling overwhelmed. And you have to take care of your own self. And I realized more and more what was needed out there was a resource, Answers for Elders, where we can help empower people, and that's how we started."

Learn more:
Alzheimer's Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Alzheimer's Speaks host Lori La Bey joins Suzanne to talk about family caregivers and how we can help support them. There are about 70 million adult family caregivers in the USA, and they spend an average of 20 hours caring for someone else each week. Many of them spend more than 40 hours a week. They allow the rest of the family to go on with their everyday lives. They make sacrifices, they hit roadblocks, they are overwhelmed, they're stressed out, and they're trying to juggle caregiving, their career, and their family.

Lori says, "I just came from two support groups that I do today, and they all said the most challenging thing to a dementia caregiver is patience. 'I need more patience. I'm exhausted, I'm tired. I don't know how to deal with something.' And that level of guilt when somebody snaps or doesn't do something as well as they know they could have. And they're very disappointed in themselves, because they really do want to care well, but we don't teach people how to care and we need to share our stories. To take that aloneness out of the equation is huge.

"The one thing I hear when I go speak is: How do I fix my siblings? How do I get them to care? How do we work as a group? People really, really struggle with that, and when you hear of a family who has it all figured out, I really let them know they are the unicorn in the room. It's not the norm."

Learn more:
Alzheimer's Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Florence Klein, author of "Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer," joins Suzanne to talk about how she's been able throughout her life to overcome fear and intimidation, lead an inspirational life, and be courageous.

Florence says, "I've been blessed with good health and that's a blessing. So I appreciate that and I'm very thankful for that. Also, I'm always looking forward and I don't look back, and so that is important. I want to make a difference, and I feel that I'm on this world now, and I'm able to, and I want to help."

"Courage is a trait that we all could use more of, not less of. And it's not what we always think about, like bravery during a dramatic mission or heroic rescue, but it simmers and manifests itself in the biggest and smallest of ways within us, when we're not even aware of its quiet but steady presence. What is courage exactly? I believe that courage is understanding yourself, having the plain old guts to go forward, and not stop. Taking the time to get to know yourself as a human being, and cultivating confidence in your own abilities, intuition, and identity, and not being concerned with what other people think about you, or what you look like, and so much of who you think you are, start not when you're 18 years old. It starts when you're three and four years old, and they label people. Oh, you're too short. And so you think, well, jeez, I can't play basketball. And so it takes courage. I never particularly really thought of myself as courageous or brave, I simply went out and did it.

"The flip side of courage is fear. And a lot of fear comes from not being able to make a difficult decision. And how many people you and I know cannot make a decision. Get over it. It's time, it's time if you have to make a decision, don't wait till, well, next year, I'll do it or well, my house isn't ready, so I can't entertain, or going down to the middle things – don't be so afraid.

"I'm inspiring young people, the Z Group. And the Z Group is from 19 to 35. I'm trying to have them have book clubs. I had one with a Z Group. I have questions in the back of my book that you should use for your for your book club. And the first question they asked is, what am I afraid of? Now think of that, an interesting discussion: what are you afraid of?"

Learn more:
* Florence's website: https://florenceunderthehat.com/
* Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer: https://florenceunderthehat.com/product/under-the-hat
* Books by Florence Klein: https://www.amazon.com/Books-Florence-Klein

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/
Check out our affiliate podcast Alzheimer’s Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Octogenarian Florence Klein, author of "Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer," joins Suzanne, talking about ageism and about being "old."

Florence says, “What is the meaning of old? "Oh, you're old." I have always felt that the word old when referring to someone who is of a certain age, starts very young. I never considered my grand mom Ida old. Yes, I was aware that she was older than me. However, I never thought of her as incapable, or incompetent to take charge of her life. She was an active woman, and we often blurred out the word "old" carelessly, not at all realizing the negative connotations. And I personally have always believed that the concept of old stays with you from an early age on throughout. Even now at 89, I don't consider myself old. I know that's all relative, but we all know how the person that may be 31 or 32 considers themselves old.

"Let's look at the definition of the term ageism, because it differs from just being older. The Miriam Webster Dictionary defines ageism as a prejudice or discrimination against a particular age group, and especially the elderly... But it's not just older people that are discriminated against, it's younger people, and older people sometimes discriminate against the youth, especially adolescents and children. Media is very condescending toward it, and media themselves says, oh, you're so young, or you're just too young for that. And that's what happened. And elders also perpetuate themselves and ageism. And so we have to be more aware of it, and that's why now people are talking about it, because after all, so much more of the population, fortunately, is staying healthier and living longer."

Learn more:
* Florence's website: https://florenceunderthehat.com/
* Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer: https://florenceunderthehat.com/product/under-the-hat
* Books by Florence Klein: https://www.amazon.com/Books-Florence-Klein

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/
Check out our affiliate podcast Alzheimer’s Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Octogenarian Florence Klein, author of "Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer," joins Suzanne. Florence was one of Philadelphia's first women stockbrokers, and the first woman real estate developer in America to renovate old factory buildings into historic condos. She volunteered in one of America's highest-security prisons, and started one of the first websites to help seniors in need. She talks about marketing her memoir as her sixth career.

Florence says, "I've always looked ahead 10 years or more, and I never look behind because you can't go back. For me, it's always looking ahead and seeing what moves ahead, what I see ahead."

Learn more:
* Florence's website: https://florenceunderthehat.com/
* Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer: https://florenceunderthehat.com/product/under-the-hat
* Books by Florence Klein: https://www.amazon.com/Books-Florence-Klein

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/
Check out our affiliate podcast Alzheimer’s Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Florence Klein, author of "Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer," joins Suzanne to talk about loneliness as a big concern for seniors. Florence says the solution is for seniors to live in inter-generational homes with young and old people living together. She also talks about social workers needing to be paid more and for seniors to make sure they go to the doctor.

Florence says, "The biggest need today is loneliness. And so what happens when seniors lose their friends, they lose their spouses or partners, their children may be across the country, across the world, and we don't have a sufficient reality, because people have put seniors into senior housing. Well, I disagree with that. I think that seniors should be intergenerational, and we should have intergenerational housing. And that means the young and the old. Maggie Kuhn years ago set up an intergenerational house with young people, maybe four or five bedrooms. And then I went to see her in Philadelphia. And it's amazing how they all work together. And even here in the west, there are still not enough intergenerational housing, the young and the old. 

"And if that is one of the major needs for today, the other need is, we need social workers to be paid more, and they're not unionized. And there's a shortage, and after all, we're all getting older. Not everybody is physically able. Who's going to help them. It used to be, families were all together. In Philadelphia, for instance, there was an Italian area, and in that Italian area in South Philadelphia, Italian people lived on the same block or two blocks next to each other. That isn't happening today even in Philadelphia. And so that is a need and can be cured through intergeneration.

"Also, we need to have people that are going to help seniors go to the doctors. Nobody takes you to the doctor. I just spoke to a friend this morning and she said, well, I got into the rotary club – we were talking my rotary club – and she says, well, I went up and fell on a bar stool off a bar stool. Well, it wasn't a bar stool, it was a stool that was putting up a light. And she called 911, and to this day, she called 911 and refused to go to the doctor. You need people to take you to the doctor, to acknowledge that you have to go. I'm working on something that I think will help remedy the situation, which I haven't totally put together yet. But it is something that I think is needed."

Learn more:
* Florence's website: https://florenceunderthehat.com/
* Under the Hat: Memoir of an Unstoppable Woman Trailblazer: https://florenceunderthehat.com/product/under-the-hat
* Books by Florence Klein: https://www.amazon.com/Books-Florence-Klein

Answers for Elders is part of the SeniorResource Network: https://www.seniorresource.com/
Check out our affiliate podcast Alzheimer’s Speaks: https://alzheimersspeaks.com/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.