Apocalypse Video

Evil has finally found a home.

The year is 1993. The Friday the 13th series has been dormant for four long years. Paramount is out. New Line Cinema is in. What does this maverick film studio responsible for bringing us the likes of Freddy Krueger have planned for one of the most popular cinema icons of the 1980s?

Well, I’ll tell ya…...demon worms and Hell, babyyyy! Bring on the Fan-Fictioney nonsense!!!

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me as we gulp down some demon worms are fellow cinephiles and hellspawn Mike, Jackie, Ryan, and Nick “Immortan Hoof”.

Topics of discussion in this episode include more false advertising as to the final-ness of Jason’s demise; we ponder the convoluted details of the sting operation set up by Crystal Lake’s SWAT department; and finally, I guess Jason is into BDSM now…? Sure, why not?

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected]. What are your thoughts on Jason Goes to Hell? Was this a low point in the franchise or a shot of black goo that the series needed? Let us know, we wanna hear from ya.

That’ll do it for this obligatory installment of our ongoing Friday the 13th series. Join us next time as we watch from ringside as two horror icons go head to head in the fight of the century with Freddy vs. Jason. Whoever wins…we lose.

Well, it’s December, and the holidays are officially upon us. Am I excited, you ask? Well…no. To be honest, this time of year always gets me nervous. All the pressure to deliver on a fun holiday themed episode after the combined promotions of Hot Dave’s Summer Film Fest and Shocktober?! It’s enough to drive a video store manager/podcast host insane! If only there was a sports film with an inspirational speech that could cure me of these pre-show jitters…

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me as we form our own bobsled team are fellow cinephiles and disgraced former Olympians Cody and Janna.

Topics of discussion in this episode include a sports movie that has it all, including a highly Disney-fied version of the real story; we wonder if Sanka secretly sabotaged the group’s chances at the Gold; and finally, I notice a startling sound effect make an appearance from a certain Galaxy Far, Far Away…

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] What are your favorite “Based on a True Story” stories? Did Disney embellish too many details or did they not embellish enough? Let us know!

That’ll do it for this week’s episode. Until next time, Keep Watching The Schweiz…

Apocalypse Video Bond-Cast Mission Dossier:

The Target:
1977’s The Spy Who Loved Me

Your Contacts:
Apocalypse Video (M)anager - Dave
Agents - Mike and Jackie
Big Headed Henchman - Ryan

Mission Objectives:

Additional Objectives:
Rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected]. Where do you land on The Spy Who Loved Me? Great Bond film? Or the Greatest Bond film? Let us know!

The Apocalypse Video Bond Cast will return as we go where no Bond has gone before with…Moonraker.

Theorizing that one could review enough movies to resurrect the art form, video store manager David Snider stepped into the Hilton Star Trek simulator…and vanished.

He awoke to find himself trapped in the past reviewing movies and shows that he'd never seen, and driven by an unknown force to bring Cinema back to the wasteland. His only guide on this journey is Janna, an observer from his own time, who appears in the form of a hologram that only Dave can see and hear.

And so Dave finds himself leaping from show to show, striving to review what once went wrong, and hoping each time that his next review will be for Avatar 3.

I’m your host and leaper, Dave, and joining me on my first Quantum Leap are fellow friends from the future Janna and Mike.

Topics of discussion in this leap include an analysis of that terrible Season 5 remix of the Quantum Leap theme song; we collectively thirst over the sex icon that is Al Calavicci; and finally, we take a brief look at the amazing life of radio sex therapist and trained sniper, Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] What are your thoughts on the Season 5 theme song? Horrible abomination or misunderstood classic of 90’s television? Let us know!

And thus concludes our first leap. We’ll return with another adventure just as soon as we can get Chad back online. He’s been so temperamental ever since we installed that Sarcasm upgrade.

Family is forever.

On tonight’s episode we return to Rob Zombie’s Haddonfield where we get a front row seat inside the mind of Michael Myers; a mind filled with white horses, flashbacks, and more David Lynchian imagery than an episode of Twin Peaks. It’s Halloween II…again.

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me as we prepare to drink the Halloween II kool-aid are fellow cinephiles and Rabbit in Red Lounge regulars, Ryan and Nick “Immortan Hoof”.

Topics of discussion in this episode include how Halloween II is a gorier, yet somehow less disgusting sequel (at least as far as the white trash element is concerned); we breakdown the differences between the Theatrical slash job (no pun intended) and the Unrated Director’s Cut; and finally, Sam Loomis morphs from a man who wanted to protect the world from Evil into an asshole who only cares about the benjamins and how good he looks on TV.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] What are your thoughts on Rob Zombie’s Halloween II? Unnecessary sequel or underseen masterpiece?

And so concludes our trip into the mad mind of Rob Zombie. The Apocalypse Video Halloween Retrospective will return with an all new reboot as we tackle the final(?) leg of our journey through Haddonfield with David Gordon Green’s Halloween. See you then, kiddies!

Evil has a Destiny.

If there’s one thing scarier than Michael Myers, it’s the Harvey Weinstein produced era of the Halloween franchise. Strap in for some white trash horror as we travel back to the year 2007 and see what Mr. Rob Zombie has in store for us with his much maligned remake of Halloween.

I’m your host, Dave, and joining me as we sift through mounds of candy corn to get to some real candy are fellow cinephiles and former Smith’s Grove patients Ryan and Nick “Immortan Hoof”.

Topics of discussion in this episode include how Rob Zombie turns Michael’s origin story into more of a twisted superhero tale; we wonder where Michael Myers is getting all of that protein powder in the sanitarium; and finally, we ask - Is Michael Myers one of only two patients in Smith’s Grove? For real, we see one other patient in the entire movie and she exists simply as rape fodder for a couple of white trash scumbags. I mean, what the hell is with this movie?!?!

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] Where do you land on the Rob Zombie remake? Inferior remake or superior reimagining? Let us know (but one of those answers is wrong).

The Apocalypse Video Halloween Retrospective will return with an all new Halloween II with…Halloween II (2009).

On the final episode of the Gothtober Spooktacular, we’re packing up our bags and moving to Santa Carla, murder capital of the world, where we’ll ride dirt bikes, hang off the bottom of bridges, and drink each other’s blood while downing a takeout box of maggots and worms…It’s The Lost Boys.

I’m your poser goth host, Dave, and joining me as we wax our muscles and shine our saxophone's are fellow familiar’s Mike, Cody, and Janna.

On this episode we talk about what it means to be goth in the late 80s with stupid fashion victims like Corey Haim everywhere; we’ll also fall into a thirst trap with that saxophone guy; and finally, Janna and Mike start writing some Lost Boys fan fiction on the spot and make the Michael / David onscreen relationship even sexier.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts – or don’t, we totally like…don’t even care. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] - What are your favorite goth films? Let us know and we’ll get together sometime…just as soon as you drink this ancient looking bottle of blood—errr, I mean….wine. Yes…that’s it. This delicious bottle of Coppola’s wine.

Anyway, that’s the last episode of the Gothtober Spooktacular. The sun’s coming out and our stupid Mom’s are coming in with milk and cookies to ask how we’re doing or whatever - pffft, freakin’ conformists…We’ll be back next year with more spooky tales for all our fellow goth freaks out there in the wasteland.

They don’t call it the Curse for nothing.

On tonight’s episode of the Apocalypse Video Gothtober Spooktacular, we travel to the Great White North, all the way to Bailey Downs, where two goth sisters have to contend with periods, horny bleacher boys, stupid cheerleader girls…and lycanthropy – it’s Ginger Snaps!

I’m your poser goth host, Dave, and joining me as we pose for some death pics are fellow posers and werewolves, Kara and Andrew.

Stuff we talk about on this episode include how Ginger Snaps should totally be shown as a gnarly form of sex-ed in public schools; we talk about the mom and her weird ass Period Cake; and finally, we totally call it early and declare Ginger Snaps as the gothiest goth film of Gothtober.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts – or don’t, we totally like…don’t even care. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] - What are your favorite goth films? Let us know and we’ll get together sometime. Just don’t call us on a full moon…

Anyway, that’s it for the Ginger Snaps episode. When the Apocalypse Video Gothtober Spooktacular concludes, we’ll be moving to the murder capital of the world as we jump on our dirt bikes and chase some vampires in Santa Carla with…The Lost Boys.

Believe in angels.

The Apocalypse Video Gothtober Spooktacular continues as we trade the powers of Manon for the gun toting, face paint wearing badassdom of The Crow.

I’m your poser goth host, Dave, and joining me are my fellow Devil’s Night partygoers Mike, Nick “Immortan Hoof”, and special guests: Madolyn and Cody.

On this episode we talk The Crow, which is basically like…the Goth Starter Kit; we’ll also get out-gothed when Madolyn says she totally digs on Tin Tin’s serial killer vibes; and finally, we have to bow in respect to freakin’ style icon, Ernie Hudson, as he like, totally doesn’t give a shit about fashion and stuff, as he walks around his apartment in his underwear, a T-shirt, and his policeman’s hat.

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts – or don’t, we totally like…don’t even care. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] - What are your favorite goth films? Let us know and we’ll get together sometime. We’re always looking for a fourth to summon Manon, or to just play some bullet drinking games. Fire it Up! Fire it UP!!!

Anyway, that’s it for The Crow episode. We’ve got to get back to our crypts. When we rise again, the Apocalypse Video Gothtober Spooktacular will be posing for some gnarly death pics with…Ginger Snaps.

Welcome To The Witching Hour.
-
In the neo post-apocalyptic wasteland…the last video store on Earth still spreads the lost art of cinema…

But during the month of October…its employees, and some special guests, shine a spotlight…on Goth.

Welcome to the Apocalypse Video Gothtober Spooktacular, I’m your poser Goth host, David Snider, and I'm joined by my fellow witches with normal sized heads, Kara and Janna.

Topics of discussion in this episode include whether Skeet Ulrich and Breckin Meyer pass or fail the Hot or Not Test; The Craft teaches us that not all mumbling strangers who brandish snakes are bad; and finally, the question that has plagued us on past episodes returns: what exactly did people in the 90s and 2000s have against big asses?

Be sure to rate, review and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts – or don’t, we totally like…don’t even care. You can also Follow Us on Twitter, Like Us on Facebook, or shoot us an email at [email protected] - What are your favorite goth films? Let us know and we’ll get together sometime. We’re always looking for a fourth to summon Manon.

Anyway, that’s it for The Craft episode or whatever. The Apocalypse Video Gothtober Spooktacular will be back with…The Crow (and not that stupid remake crap…that shit’s totally laaaame).