Baconsale

Ethan Hunt and his Impossible Mission Force have taken on arms dealers, rogue agents, rabbit’s feet, nuclear bombs, terrorists, and the Syndicate, but nothing had prepared them for their most recent obstacle: a global pandemic that shut down filmmaking. However, despite all the delays, Tom Cruise managed to pull together his team for a seventh time to make the first part of a two-part story. Joel was disavowed from the movie screening of Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One, so Kent and Zack are going to give their reviews, but not before letting Joel guess the plot summary. And don’t worry, we’ll give you a warning before we download & decrypt all the spoilers.

 

Press play to feel like Pierce Brosnan’s James Bond.

Back in the day, it only cost a quarter to go to the movie theater and you could get an ice cream soda for a nickel! But times have changed, prices have risen, and things are more expensive now. So on this episode of Baconsale, we’re taking a look at the top ten highest-grossing movies of all time, adjusted for inflation. And while these popular box office blockbusters have an objective order, Joel, Kent, and Zack are going to give their personal rankings, share their reviews, offer some A.I. insights, and compare our average top ten with Wikipedia’s.

 

Press play to learn the difference between flicks, films, movies, and cinema.

O say, can you hear? The Boogie Woogie Baconsale Boys are preparing for their Independence Day celebration by picking some of the most patriotic party tunes of all time. What qualifies a song for our official 4th of July playlist? Well, it has to say the word America, or name cities in the U.S.A., or be about freedom, or mention popular national pastimes, or allude to fireworks, or instill feelings of happiness, or have a good beat… Okay, so we’re a little loose with the theme, but what’s more American than hearing the music Joel, Kent, and Zack are planning to play during our little town’s parade, the family barbeque, and our Canada-shaming fireworks show?

 

Mayor Bigmustache and his extended family request that you press play.

 

And visit Baconsale.com to find our official Spotify playlist.

Believe it or not, it’s been 15 years since the last attempt at an Indiana Jones movie, but will this sequel be more well-received than Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? That’s what Joel, Kent, and Zack are going to decide as we review Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny. We’ll reveal if Phoebe Waller-Bridge makes a good sidekick for Dr. Jones, if Industrial Light and Magic is able to help Indy believably ride again, and if this film may be akin to elderly abuse. The first part of this BaconBit is spoiler-free. Then we’ll let you know before we navigate through the spoiler wormhole, where we’ll discuss specific details, including the original ending that tested poorly with audiences.

 

Press play to crack that whip one more time.

Lights! Camera! Traction! Last time we talked about cars on Baconsale, Kent & Joel were a little out of their element. Therefore, on this episode, we’ve swerved back into the pop culture lane to discuss famous motor vehicles from movies & TV. We’ll be selecting answers for such categories as Best in a Street Race, Completely Impractical (But We Still Want to Drive It), Family Vacation Car, Non-DeLorean Time Machine, and Wouldn’t Drive It If You Paid Me. As we wildly shift gears and talk about films we’ve never mentioned on the podcast before, we hope you enjoy Joel needing to know the colors, Kent’s constant attempts to impress women, and Zack trying to not laugh at our automobile ignorance.

 

Press play to cram your car full of NOS and Gushers.

If you’ve been as excited for the sequel to Extraction as we have been, listener, then… you probably haven’t been that excited for it. In fact, you may not have even known that this Netflix streaming movie or Tyler Rake even existed. Nevertheless, we’re determined to review Extraction 2, with or without subtitles, for some reason. Joel, Kent, and Zack watched this movie (at varying speeds) and they’re going to let you know if the plot is as complicated as the original, if the action sequences are as intense, and if any of it actually matters.

 

Don’t get any arm or hand wounds while pressing play!

We don't know how to put this, but Baconsale is kind of a big deal. We may not have nunchuck skills or bow-hunting skills, but by Grabthar’s Hammer, we are skilled at creating contentious tournaments. On this episode, we have a plethora of infamous comedies that were submitted by you, the really, really, really, ridiculously good-looking listener. Joel, Kent, and Zack have put these humorous movies on a bracket, and you’ll see the violence inherent in the system as we vote for which one is the funniest. Some decisions are so fetch, others are gonna leave a mark, and you may believe we’ve pulled the wrong lever at times, but just when you think our decisions couldn’t possibly be any dumber, perhaps we totally redeem ourselves?

 

Don’t call us Shirley, just press play, you hoser!

 

And visit Baconsale.com to print out our official comedy bracket & play along!

It’s been a very slow road getting here, but the fastest man alive has finally arrived on the big screen. But is The Flash worth the wait? On this BaconBit, Kent and Joel are ready to quickly review the speedster’s solo movie. Kent may be a little bitter about the path the DC Extended Universe has taken, and Joel is surprised that this movie wasn’t canceled before it was released. However, is this film the big reset button DC Studios was hoping for? Have Ezra Miller’s extra-curricular activities killed the buzz surrounding this Justice League follow-up? Will Batman save the day? Listen to find out.

 

Press play to enter the Polar Express Vortex!

Have you ever started to get invested in a TV series, only to have it abruptly end without a satisfying conclusion? That’s what we’ll be venting about on this episode of Baconsale with our guest, Debbie. We’ve each picked five television shows that ended before their time. We’ll share what they were about, why they were canceled, and how we wish they could have ended. No, we won’t be talking about Firefly, because this whole episode is brought to you by that amazing space Western. However, we will be discussing flesh & blood adaptations, sharing some disappointing revelations, and giving spoiler alerts before kind of (but not really) spoiling each show.

 

Press play before this episode is erased from existence by either FOX or Netflix!

A few years ago, Baconsale confessed our pop culture blind spots to you, the listener. You accepted us, despite our shortcomings, and so we decided to do it again. First of all, Joel, Kent, and Zack follow-up on the films we talked about last time and see how much progress we've made. Then we'll take a look at the gaps in our knowledge about popular bands, books, TV series, and video games. Plus, we have a miscellaneous category where we can confess anything else we know nothing about. Along the way, we'll approve each other's answers, support each other in their endeavors, and plan some very strange sleepovers.

 

Press play to get blind with Baconsale.