Hey There Delilah, it’s time for Baconsale to Crank That bracket of 2000s songs from the Around the World (La La La La La) and declare an ultimate winner! As we’re Ridin’ along, no band or artist is Bulletproof, because the one-hit wonder police are here to Shake It up a bit. When some music match-ups Collide, it’s a bit of a Paralyzer for Kent, Joel, and Zack. Nevertheless, The Boys of Summer will press forward and make the difficult decisions as they comb through A Thousand Miles of random facts. And of course, as is to be expected, things get a little Crazy.

Go on. Go on. Leave me Breathless by pressing play.

And you can download your own advanced 2000s one-hit wonder at Baconsale.com.

Who Let the Dogs Out? Well, that’s exactly what we’re going to try to figure out Right Now. On this episode of Baconsale, we’re talking about one-hit wonders of the 2000s. Everytime We Touch one of these music tournaments, people get a little Headstrong and say we made them have a Bad Day. Nevertheless, we’re going to advance one round on our bracket this time, and after a few Days Go By, we’ll do another episode where we’ll determine which song wins All or Nothing.

Wherever You Will Go, Crush that play button, Butterfly!

Download our official 2000s one-hit wonder bracket at Baconsale.com.

It was a dark and stormy night, and Kent, Joel, and Jacob are hunkered down in the Baconcave, ready to bring you horrifying true crime stories to end this Halloween season. Beware, the tales we share may be a bit too intense for children, but we’ll still try to keep things as family friendly as we can…while discussing murder. Along the way, [INSERT RUNNING GAGS FROM THE EPISODE]

Press play to [INSERT INSIDE JOKE]

[SCHEDULED TO PUBLISH ON 10/26]

Two years after The Haunting of Hill House terrified Kent and Joel, Netflix has released the second story in this eerie anthology, The Haunting of Bly Manor. But will this sequel series be as scary as we supposed? We’ll keep the first part of this review spoiler-free, so even if you haven’t seen it yet, you can still listen to this BaconBit. After that, we’ll discuss all nine episodes and give our opinions on the story, the characters, and the way the story is told.

It’s you. It’s me. It’s Baconsale. Press play.

Attention, earthlings! You are not alone in this universe. Baconsale is here to talk to you about aliens, visitors from another planet, invaders from outer space, little green men, Greys, Reptilians, Nordics, or whatever else you want to call them. After briefly sharing their personal beliefs and stories about extraterrestrial encounters, Kent, Joel, and Zack are going to discuss the history of UFO sightings and alien abductions. We’re also going to zap through as many alien invasion movies as we possibly can, giving the good ones our stamp of approval.

The truth is out there. Now, press play before the government can cover up this episode. And keep watching the skies!

On this episode of Baconsale, we’re making The Descent into horror once again with a new Decade Dance. This time, our Final Destination is a list of the ten best scary movies released between 2000 and 2009, brought to you by Shaun of the Dead. And as we go Behind the Mask on these freaky flicks, we see Signs that Zack has actually seen (Saw?) one or two of the picks on our lists, but not most of The Others. And please don’t hold a Grudge that Joel forgets about a heavy hitter in the horror game. He’s still kicking himself that he Mist (missed?) that one.

Don’t wait seven days, press play now!

Joel’s a big fan of scary movies, and he wants his children to appreciate them, as well, so he’s created a four-phase training program to introduce his offspring to the horror genre. It’s not just for kids, though. This evolving spreadsheet of 80 frightening films could be for anyone who wants to dip their toes into the spooky swimming pool. Kent was thrown into the deep end as a kid and has his opinions about the flicks that Joel picked, while Zack is a horror novice who isn’t afraid of clowns, however he’s terrified of lady Gremlins.

Press play to be another one of Joel’s guinea pigs in this Baconsale classroom of terror!

And visit Baconsale.com to see the spreadsheet we discuss in this episode.

Cryptids are animals whose existence has not yet been proven. And it’s time for Baconsale to put some of these mythical creatures into hypothetical fights where only one of them will be left standing. Our friend Nicole, a cryptid enthusiast, is here to teach us about the folklore behind each contender and help decide who would win in such epic matchups as Bigfoot vs. The Flatwoods Monster, the Loch Ness Monster vs. the Bear Lake Monster, the Jersey Devil vs. the Dover Demon and, of course, Manananggal vs. Gef the Talking Mongoose.

Press play to hear some horrible pronunciations during our most random tournament yet!

And download your own Cryptid Bracket at Baconsale.com!

If you were able to pick a soundtrack to represent various times in your life, which songs would you pick? That’s the question we’re answering on this episode of Baconsale. Kent, Joel, Zack, and Jacob are all going to select music for things like their high school experience, their dating lives, their earliest childhood memories, and even their farewell songs. Jacob makes some odd choices, Joel was a little girl crazy, Kent sews his own pants, and even though Zack is the youngest, he tends to pick the oldest tunes.

Press play to play the mamba with Marconi!

Jacob has taken a break from his busy schedule and his chalupas to join us in the Baconcave with the ultimate Jacob Twist: he’s stepping down as a regular host of Baconsale. This news is a little sad, yes, but it’s also kind of expected, right? It’s not all melancholy and infinite sadness, though. Jacob is going to give his skewed version of the history of Baconsale, Joel and Kent are going to give some of their favorite Jacob moments, and there’s an official passing of the torch ceremony from Jacob to Zack, where they almost burn down the place.

It’s not goodbye, he’ll still return occasionally, but press play to hear it all straight from Jacob’s mouth.