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【白蔥仔公主】EP01-有夠皮ê水姑娘 台語白話字 Tâi-gí POJ (Pe̍h-ōe-jī)
講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】是做工á人工作室製作ê全新單元，歡迎收聽【白蔥á公主】，真ló͘-la̍t，真感謝。
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以下內容是漢羅kah pe̍h-ōe-jī原稿，有需要歡迎ta̍k-ke來參考。
【漢羅版】
各位線頂ê聽眾朋友，ta̍k-ê平安, ta̍k-ê好, 歡迎收聽做工á人phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h，我是主持人Bí-leng！講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】是做工á人工作室製作ê全新單元，今á日beh講--ê，是咱【白蔥á公主】第1集。Tī節目開始進前，kā ta̍k-ke提醒，手機á ài ka關--起-來，m̄通影響tio̍h別人…(手機á關--起-來是beh按怎聽)，o͘h，m̄是teh看電影hoⁿh，好，手機á ka開較大聲--leh，有趣味--ê，樓頂招樓腳，ta̍k-ke做～夥～聽！
古早古早，有1 ê美麗ê國家，雖罔m̄是kài好額，mā bē講足散赤，因為chit ê國家ê國王，有好好á teh做代誌，所以--à，百姓ê生活，過了算是bē-bái。國王kah王后in翁á某感情chiâⁿ好，m̄-koh in ê查某囝tăⁿ出世無偌久，王后to̍h破病過身--a。國王雖然真艱苦，m̄-koh看tio̍h chit ê tú出世ê公主，kah in阿母kāng款，皮膚白白白，目睭大大蕊，有夠古錐，伊to̍h真疼惜chit ê súi-tang-tang ê查某囝。
公主自細漢to̍h足iau鬼，看到食--ê to̍h會伸手，物件捎--leh to̍h ùi嘴--eh that，所以--à，伊猶m̄-bat代誌，tú會曉行ê時，to̍h知影桌巾真歹pō͘，蠟燭無好食，he椅á腳無滋味。伊3歲ê時陣，人koh感覺伊足古錐，有啥物好食物á to̍h攏the̍h hō͘--伊，看伊食kah hiah有滋味，ta̍k-ke mā感覺歡喜。M̄-koh伊實在siuⁿ iau-sâi，到伊5歲ê時，ta̍k-ke nā看tio̍h伊，to̍h ài趕緊kā食ê物件藏--起-來，bē輸去tú tio̍h iau死鬼！Tī chit ê國家，咱人一般nā相借問，攏會問講：「你食飽--未？」M̄-koh，nā是tú tio̍h公主，to̍h無人會án-ne kā伊ăi-siat-chuh，因為ta̍k-ke攏知影，伊永遠食bē飽。Ka-chài伊攏食bē大kho͘，瘦pi-pa，皮膚koh白蔥蔥，所以--à，人攏開始稱呼伊是「白蔥á公主」。
白蔥á公主真活潑，mā有人感覺伊足chiān，伊m̄-nā真興食，koh有2 ê歹習慣，第1 ê歹習慣to̍h是，伊足ài kâng鎖門，chit ê習慣是án怎來--ê？有1工hoⁿh，he廚房--ê驚伊偷食，kā門鎖--起-來，白蔥á公主tī外口撞門撞10分鐘，人to̍h走--ah，廚房ê總舖kah腳手想講伊放棄--ah，讚ŏ͘，想bē到料理做好，soah m̄知去hō͘ siáng鎖tī廚房內面，無法度出--去，國王1 ê人戇戇á坐tī餐廳，腹肚iau kah tân雷公，tī hia想講今á日暗頓nah會猶未chhoân好勢。Chit時hoⁿh，公主伊家己soah走去se̍h夜市á食雞排，koh配真珠奶茶。
第2 ê歹習慣to̍h是，伊手足chiān，伊足ài烏白捎別人ê寶貝物á來sńg，m̄-nā án-ne，伊定定sńg-sńg--leh，物件koh烏白擲，he人ê寶貝物á neh！有1 kái，白蔥á公主走去街á lōa-lōa趖，管區--ê派2 ê警察teh ka保護，伊看tio̍h警察ê褲袋á khǹg 1副手銬，感覺好奇，to̍h ka借來sńg，警察看公主kā手銬the̍h懸懸，ná笑ná tī hia跳舞，看--起-來實在有夠古錐，想bē到伊1-ē戇神，白蔥á公主soah m̄知走tó去，因為án-ne，hit 2 ê警察去hō͘主管罵kah臭頭，koh較淒慘--ê是，hit工e晡，hit ê警察去掠賊偷，jiok 1000公尺了後，總算是掠tio̍h人，chit時chiah發見手銬hō͘白蔥á公主借去sńg，soah無hâiⁿ--伊，tú掠--tio̍h ê賊偷koh去ho͘走--去，實在有夠衰。Hit工beh暗ê時，有1 ê生理人，擔tú收好勢，趕緊beh轉去放尿，趕到厝，鎖匙the̍h--出-來，soah看tio̍h in tau大門ê鎖頂頭，ke鎖1副手銬，hit工，kui條街á ê人攏聽tio̍h有人tī hia大聲喝講：
「我beh放尿，我beh放尿--lah！」
日子過了chiâⁿ緊，白蔥á公主1工1工á大漢，面模á mā愈來愈水，愈來愈親像in阿母，猶m̄-koh kah in阿母無kāng--ê是，伊soah愈來愈chiān。雖罔伊規工tī hia變鬼變怪，造成別人ê困擾，m̄-koh水姑娘á生成to̍h較占贏，ta̍k kái若舞啥物代誌出--來，只要伊嘴舌thó͘--1-ē，目睭nih--1-ē，笑笑á講：
「歹勢--lah！」
看tio̍h伊he古錐ê笑面，to̍h無人ē kah伊計較。一直到伊14歲ê時陣，伊ê迷眾頁竟然有超過180萬ê fans，全世界mā kan-na外國ê 1 ê天團，hō做「炸彈少女團」--ê，比白蔥á公主ke 20萬ê fans niâ。雖然伊chiah-nī受歡迎，m̄-koh，國王soah有淡薄á煩惱：
「Aih，chit ê白蔥á公主hoⁿh，siuⁿ活潑，公主m̄ to̍h ài較有氣質--leh！是講ā莫怪--lah！In老母早早to̍h過身，我上班閣足無閒，定定放伊1 ê四界拋拋走，chiah會變kah袂輸野馬--leh。Cha̍p…袂使，閣按呢落--去，我真正ē kā伊sēng歹--去。不如…我koh來chhōa--1-ê，有1 ê序大tòe tī伊身軀邊ka教，應該是ē較好--li。」
國王kā手伸入去伊ê褲袋á，tī hia lā--leh lā--leh，kā伊ê Pa̍t-á牌手機á jîm--出-來，年初chiah新推出，上新上大支ê hit支。伊kā手機á chhi̍h--開，點入去婚姻紹介ê網站，申請1 ê口座，to̍h開始beh寫伊ê個人資料。Hit時，伊看tio̍h網頁邊--á顯示ê統計：「本網站配對，上得人意愛ê頭路：頭名，工程師，第2名，公務人員。」國王心內to̍h teh想講：
「Hit ê工程師hoⁿh，高科技，he我m̄-bat，m̄-koh我mā算是1 ê公務人員--ā，應該有機會--lah！」
想想--eh，伊to̍h tī個人資料ê職業欄，輸入「國王」chit ê職業，sòa--lòe伊koh tī手機á內面，chhōe tio̍h 1張伊18年前ê相片，傳--起-lih。資料攏chhoân好勢，送--出-去，想講舞chiah久，beh叫人kā伊chhoân chê bì-luh，chit時手機á「叮」1聲，發來配對成功ê通知，koh來「叮、叮叮叮、叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮」，he聲音soah一直叫，叫bē恬，伊趕緊kā手機á the̍h起來看，óa，不得了，竟然有四、五百ê查某會員，對伊有興趣。
伊kā hit kóa配對ê資料點開來看，頭1位，to̍h看tio̍h 1 ê穿烏色膨裙，妝畫了chiâⁿ水，看--起-來足khiàng腳ê查某人。Hit ê查某人ê自我紹介，tah真濟伊四界旅行、食高級料理ê相片，koh講伊bat chiâⁿ濟大頭家，真gâu投資，趁足濟錢，taⁿ已經30外歲--ah，想beh chhōe 1 ê認真對待--伊，會使鬥陣過1世人ê翁婿，落尾koh寫1條
「真正有心，chiah kah我聯絡，nā是想beh sńg-sńg--eh準tú soah--ê，勞煩你去chhōe別人！」
國王看tio̍h真kah意，chiah-nī-á khiàng腳ê查某人，一定ē-tàng做白蔥á公主ê好chhōa頭，想tio̍h che，伊to̍h趕緊chhōe「我有興趣」hit粒chhi̍h鈕ka chhi̍h--lòe，準備beh約chit ê穿烏色膨裙ê查某人出來見面。經過九九81點鐘，in to̍h結婚--a。
Chit ê新ê王后，人足有禮貌，氣質真好，ah m̄-koh，he攏是伊假--出-來-ê，其實伊少年ê時陣，teh替烏道做仙人跳，年歲較大了後，to̍h去做詐騙集團ê成員，後--來集團去hông chhiau-chhiau--去，伊走了緊，無去hông掠--tio̍h，m̄-koh soah去hông通緝，伊to̍h想beh換chê所在發展，chit時tú好看tio̍h國王想beh chhōa某ê網頁，hit張相片hoⁿh戇面á戇面，看--起-來to̍h ká-ná足好kòng ê盼á，伊隨to̍h ka點1 ê愛心，sòa--lòe to̍h是咱進前講--ê，in to̍h順利結婚--a。
雖罔是tú結婚，m̄-koh國王無佔用王后siuⁿ濟時間，m̄是伊無擋頭，真正是國王ê工課chiâⁿ濟，真無閒。國王拜託chit ê tăⁿ chhōa入門ê王后，親身去教白蔥á公主，王后心內teh想：
「Hăⁿ？Beh叫我去教公主？我kan-na bat tī詐騙集團，教菜鳥á án怎kâng騙neh。」
翻頭koh想講：
「Mā是會使--lah，我chiah-nī巧，烏白chòaⁿ mā應該準會過，to̍h算是我teh服務hō͘我騙ê客戶好--ah。」
自án-ne kā工課ín--落-來。頭1回上課，lesson one，教禮儀。
「若beh做1 ê淑女，不管是khiā--leh，坐--leh，甚至是teh khû便所ê時，攏ài展現出你ê氣質。」
「Khû便所a̍h無人khoàiⁿ--à，kám bē-tàng放較輕鬆--leh？」
「恬--去！淑女隨時攏ài百分之百ê完美，閣再講，你哪會知影khû便所to̍h無人會看，ah nā萬不二有人teh看--leh？」
「He to̍h變態--a，he nā去hō͘我tú--tio̍h hoⁿh，to̍h叫人kā伊拖去phah phah--leh，chiah擲入去便所沖掉！」
「恬--去！淑女bē使使用暴力，world peace！做1 ê淑女，隨時攏ài有氣質，ài面á笑笑m̄-chiah tio̍h！」
「Ah你nā是秘結--leh？你kám笑ē出--來？」
「恬--去！恬--去！恬--去！」
各位聽眾，因為王后ê血壓siuⁿ懸，無法度閣sòa lŏe演，我看時間mā差不多--a，ah無咱今á日ê節目to̍h先到chia，
感謝ta̍k-ke收聽咱狡怪囡á古，白蔥á公主。
Chit ê故事，是由咱做工á人工作室製作，編劇：Chiá-siông，演出：Bí-leng，音樂／影片：Niau-tāu，字幕／校對：A-chin in ang。今á日ê故事聽了若感覺有趣味，ài kā阮chhi̍h讚，注文，tàu宣傳o͘h！Ló͘-la̍t！再會！
【Pe̍h-ōe-jī pán】
Kok-ūi sòaⁿ-téng ê thiaⁿ-chiòng pêng-iú, ta̍k-ê pêng-an, ta̍k-ê hó, hoan-gêng siu-thiaⁿ Chò-kang-á-lâng phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h, góa sī chú-chhî-jîn Bí-leng! Kóng chhù-bī ê Tâi-gí, chò chhù-bī ê tāi-chì, “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘” sī Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok ê choân-sin tan-goân, kin-á-ji̍t beh kóng--ê, sī lán “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú” tē 1 chi̍p. Tī chiat-bo̍k khai-sí chìn-chêng, kā ta̍k-ke thê-chhéⁿ, chhiú-ki-á ài ka koaiⁿ--khí-lâi, m̄-thang éng-hióng tio̍h pa̍t-lâng… “Chhiú-ki-á koaiⁿ--khí-lâi sī beh án-chóaⁿ thiaⁿ”, o͘h, m̄ sī teh khòaⁿ tiān-iáⁿ hoⁿh, hó, chhiú-ki-á ka khui khah tōa-siaⁿ--leh, ū chhù-bī--ê, lâu-téng chio lâu-kha, ta̍k-ke chò-hóe thiaⁿ!
Kó͘-chá kó͘-chá, ū 1 ê bí-lē ê kok-ka, sui-bóng m̄ sī kài hó-gia̍h, mā bē kóng chiok sàn-chhiah, in-ūi chit ê kok-ka ê kok-ông, ū hó-hó-á teh chò tāi-chì, só͘-í--à, peh-sèⁿ ê seng-oa̍h, kòe liáu sǹg sī bē-bái. Kok-ông kah ông-hiō in ang-á-bó͘ kám-chêng chiâⁿ hó, m̄-koh in ê cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ tăⁿ chhut-sì bô jōa-kú, ông-hiō to̍h phòa-pēⁿ kòe-sin--a. Kok-ông sui-jiân chin kan-khó͘, m̄-koh khòaⁿ tio̍h chit ê tú chhut-sì ê kong-chú, kah in a-bú kāng-khoán, phôe-hu pe̍h-pe̍h-pe̍h, ba̍k-chiu tōa-tōa lúi, ū kàu kó͘-chui, i to̍h chin thiàⁿ-sioh chit ê súi-tang-tang ê cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ.
Kong-chú chū sè-hàn to̍h chiok iau-kúi, khòaⁿ-tio̍h chia̍h--ê to̍h ē chhun-chhiú, mi̍h-kiāⁿ sa--leh to̍h ùi chhùi--eh that, só͘-í--à, i iáu m̄-bat tāi-chì, tú ē-hiáu kiâⁿ ê sî, to̍h chai-iáⁿ toh-kin chin pháiⁿ pō͘, la̍h-chek bô hó chia̍h, he í-á-kha bô chu-bī. I 3 hòe ê sî-chūn, lâng koh kám-kak i chiok kó͘-chui, ū siáⁿ-mih hó-chia̍h-mih-á to̍h lóng the̍h hō͘--i, khòaⁿ i chia̍h kah hiah ū chu-bī, ta̍k-ke mā kám-kak hoaⁿ-hí. M̄-koh i si̍t-chāi siuⁿ iau-sâi, kàu i 5 hòe ê sî, ta̍k-ke nā khòaⁿ-tio̍h i, to̍h ài kóaⁿ-kín kā chia̍h ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ chhàng--khí-lâi, bē-su khì tú tio̍h iau-sí-kúi! Tī chit ê kok-ka, lán lâng it-poaⁿ nā sio-chioh-mn̄g, lóng ē mn̄g kóng: “Lí chia̍h pá--bē?” M̄-koh, nā sī tú tio̍h kong-chú, to̍h bô lâng ē án-ne kā i ăi-siat-chuh, in-ūi ta̍k-ke lóng chai-iáⁿ, i éng-oán chia̍h bē pá. Ka-chài i lóng chia̍h bē tōa-kho͘, sán-pi-pa, phôe-hu koh pe̍h-chhang-chhang, só͘-í--à, lâng lóng khai-sí chheng-ho͘ i sī “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú”.
Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú chin oa̍h-phoat, mā ū lâng kám-kak i chiok chiān, i m̄-nā chin hèng chia̍h, koh ū 2 ê pháiⁿ si̍p-koàn, tē 1 ê pháiⁿ si̍p-koàn to̍h sī, i chiok ài kâng só-mn̂g, chit ê si̍p-koàn sī án-chóaⁿ lâi--ê? Ū 1 kang hoⁿh, he tû-pâng--ê kiaⁿ i thau-chia̍h, kā mn̂g só--khí-lâi, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú tī gōa-kháu lòng-mn̂g lóng 10 hun-cheng, lâng to̍h cháu--ah, tû-pâng ê chóng-phò͘ kah kha-chhiú siūⁿ-kóng i hòng-khì--ah, chán ŏ͘, siūⁿ bē-kàu liāu-lí chò hó, soah m̄ chai khì hō͘ siáng só tī tû-pâng lāi-bīn, bô-hoat-tō͘ chhut--khì, kok-ông 1 ê lâng gōng-gōng-á chē tī chhan-thiaⁿ, pak-tó͘ iau kah tân lûi-kong, tī hia siūⁿ-kóng kin-á-ji̍t àm-tǹg neh ē iáu-bē chhoân hó sè. Chit sî hoⁿh, kong-chú i ka-tī soah cháu-khì se̍h iā-chhī-á chia̍h ke-pâi, koh phòe chin-chu leng-tê.
Tē 2 ê pháiⁿ si̍p-koàn to̍h sī, i chhiú chiok chiān, i chiok ài o͘-pe̍h sa pa̍t-lâng ê pó-pòe mih-á lâi sńg, m̄-nā án-ne, i tiāⁿ-tiāⁿ sńg-sńg--leh, mi̍h-kiāⁿ koh o͘-pe̍h tàn, he lâng ê pó-pòe mih-á neh! Ū 1 kái, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú cháu khì ke-á lōa-lōa-sô, koán-khu--ê phài 2 ê kéng-chhat teh ka pó-hō͘, i khòaⁿ tio̍h kéng-chhat ê khò͘-tē-á khǹg 1 hù chhiú-khàu, kám-kak hòⁿ-kî, to̍h ka chioh lâi sńg, kéng-chhat khòaⁿ kong-chú kā chhiú-khàu the̍h koân-koân, ná chhiò ná tī hia thiàu-bú, khòaⁿ--khí-lâi si̍t-chāi ū-kàu kó͘-chui, siūⁿ bē-kàu i 1-ē gōng-sîn, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú soah m̄-chai cháu tó khì, in-ūi án-ne, hit 2 ê kéng-chhat khì hō͘ chú-koán mē kah chhàu-thâu, koh khah chhi-chhám--ê sī, hit kang e-po͘, hit ê kéng-chhat khì lia̍h chha̍t-thau, jiok 1000 kong-chhioh liáu-āu, chóng-sǹg sī lia̍h tio̍h lâng, chit sî chiah hoat-kiàn chhiú-khàu hō͘ Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú chioh khì sńg, soah bô hâiⁿ--i, tú lia̍h--tio̍h ê chha̍t-thau koh khì ho͘ cháu--khì, si̍t-chāi ū-kàu soe. Hit kang beh àm ê sî, ū 1 ê seng-lí-lâng, tàⁿ tú siu hó-sè, kóaⁿ-kín beh tńg-khì pàng-jiō, kóaⁿ kàu chhù, só-sî the̍h--chhut-lâi, soah khòaⁿ tio̍h in tau tōa-mn̂g ê só téng-thâu, ke só 1 hù chhiú-khàu, hit kang, kui-tiâu ke-á ê lâng lóng thiaⁿ tio̍h ū lâng tī hia tōa-siaⁿ hoah kóng: “Góa beh pàng-jiō, góa beh pàng-jiō--lah!”
Ji̍t-chí kòe liáu chiâⁿ kín, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú 1 kang 1 kang-á tōa-hàn, bīn-bô͘-á mā jú lâi jú súi, jú lâi jú chhin-chhiūⁿ in a-bú, iáu m̄-koh kah in a-bú bô kāng--ê sī, i soah jú lâi jú chiān, sui-bóng i kui-kang tī hia pìⁿ-kúi-pìⁿ-koài, chō-sêng pa̍t-lâng ê khùn-jiáu, m̄-koh súi ko͘-niû-á siⁿ-sêng to̍h khah chiàm iâⁿ, ta̍k kái nā bú siáⁿ-mih tāi-chì chhut--lâi, chí-iàu i chhùi-chi̍h thó͘--1-ē, ba̍k-chiu nih--1-ē, chhiò-chhiò-á kóng: “Pháiⁿ-sè--lah!” Khòaⁿ tio̍h i he kó͘-chui ê chhiò-bīn, to̍h bô lâng ē kah i kè-kàu. It-ti̍t kàu i 14 hòe ê sî-chūn, i ê bê-chiòng-ia̍h kèng-jiân ū chhiau-kòe 180 bān ê fans, choân sè-kài mā kan-na gōa-kok ê 1 ê thian-thoân, hō chò “Chà-tân Siàu-lú-thoân”--ê, pí Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ke 20 bān ê fans niâ. Sui-jiân i chiah-nī siū hoan-gêng, m̄-koh, kok-ông soah ū tām-po̍h-á hoân-ló: “Aih, chit ê Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú hoⁿh, siuⁿ oa̍h-phoat, kong-chú m̄ to̍h ài khah ū khì-chit--leh! Sī kóng ā bo̍k-koài--lah! In lāu-bú chá-chá to̍h kòe-sin, góa siōng pan koh chiok bô-êng, tiāⁿ-tiāⁿ pàng i 1 ê sì-kè pha-pha-cháu, chiah ē piàn kah bē-su iá-bé--leh. Cha̍p…bē-sái, koh án-ne lo̍h--khì, góa chin-chiàⁿ ē kā i sēng pháiⁿ--khì. Put-jû…góa koh lâi chhōa--1-ê, ū 1 ê sī-tōa tòe tī i sin-khu piⁿ ka kà, èng-kai sī ē khah hó--li.”
Kok-ông kā chhiú chhun ji̍p-khì i ê khò͘-tē-á, tī hia lā--leh lā--leh, kā i ê Pa̍t-á pâi chhiú-ki-á jîm--chhut-lâi, nî-chhe chiah sin thui-chhut, siōng sin siōng tōa ki ê hit ki. I kā chhiú-ki-á chhi̍h--khui, tiám ji̍p khì hun-in siāu-kài ê bāng-chām, sin-chhéng 1 ê kháu-chō, to̍h khai-sí beh siá i ê kò-jîn chu-liāu. Hit sî, i khòaⁿ tio̍h bāng-ia̍h piⁿ--á hián-sī ê thóng-kè: “Pún bāng-chām phòe-tùi, siōng tit lâng ì-ài ê thâu-lō͘: Thâu-miâ, kang-têng-su, tē 2 miâ, kong-bū jîn-oân.” Kok-ông sim-lāi to̍h teh siūⁿ kóng: “Hit ê kang-têng-su hoⁿh, ko-kho-ki, he góa m̄-bat, m̄-koh góa mā sǹg sī 1 ê kong-bū jîn-oân--ā, èng-kai ū ki-hōe--lah!” Siūⁿ-siūⁿ--eh, i to̍h tī kò-jîn chu-liāu ê chit-gia̍p nôa, su-ji̍p “Kok-ông” chit ê chit-gia̍p, sòa--lòe i koh tī chhiú-ki-á lāi-bīn, chhōe tio̍h 1 tiuⁿ i 18 nî-chêng ê siòng-phìⁿ, thoân--khí-lih. Chu-liāu lóng chhoân hó-sè, sàng--chhut-khì, siūⁿ kóng bú chiah kú, beh kiò lâng kā i chhoân chê bì-luh, chit-sî chhiú-ki-á “tin” 1 siaⁿ, hoat lâi phòe-tùi sêng-kong ê thong-ti, koh lâi “tin, tin tin tin, tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin”, he siaⁿ-im soah it-ti̍t kiò, kiò bē tiām, i kóaⁿ-kín kā chhiú-ki-á the̍h khí-lâi khòaⁿ, óa, put-tek-liáu, kèng-jiân ū 4, 5 pah ê cha-bó͘ hōe-oân, tùi i ū hèng-chhù.
I kā hit kóa phòe-tùi ê chu-liāu tiám khui lâi khòaⁿ, thâu 1 ūi, to̍h khòaⁿ tio̍h 1 ê chhēng o͘-sek phòng-kûn, chng ōe liáu chiâⁿ súi, khòaⁿ--khí-lâi chiok khiàng-kha ê cha-bó͘-lâng. Hit ê cha-bó͘-lâng ê chū-ngó͘ siāu-kài, tah chin chē i sì-kè lú-hêng, chia̍h ko-kip liāu-lí ê siòng-phìⁿ, koh kóng i bat chiâⁿ chē tōa thâu-ke, chin gâu tâu-chu, thàn chok chē chîⁿ, taⁿ í-keng 30 gōa hòe--ah, siūⁿ beh chhōe 1 ê jīn-chin tùi-thāi--i, ē-sái tàu-tīn kòe 1 sì lâng ê ang-sài, lo̍h-bóe koh siá 1 tiâu “Chin-chiàⁿ ū sim, chiah kah góa liân-lo̍k, nā sī siūⁿ beh sńg-sńg--eh chún tú soah--ê, lô-hoân lí khì chhōe pa̍t-lâng!” Kok-ông khòaⁿ tio̍h chin kah-ì, chiah-nī-á khiàng-kha ê cha-bó͘-lâng, it-tēng ē-tàng chò Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ê hó chhōa-thâu, siūⁿ tio̍h che, i to̍h kóaⁿ-kín chhōe “Góa ū hèng-chhù” hit lia̍p chhi̍h liú ka chhi̍h--lòe, chún-pī beh iok chit ê chhēng o͘-sek phòng-kûn ê cha-bó͘-lâng chhut-lâi kìⁿ-bīn. Keng-kòe kiú kiú 81 tiám-cheng, in to̍h kiat-hun--a.
Chit ê sin ê ông-hiō, lâng chok ū lé-māu, khì-chit chin hó, ah m̄-koh, he lóng sī i ké--chhut-lâi-ê, kî-si̍t i siàu-liân ê sî-chūn, teh thè o͘-tō chò sian-jîn-thiàu, nî-hòe khah tōa liáu-āu, to̍h khì chò chà-phiàn chi̍p-thoân ê sêng-oân, āu--lâi chi̍p-thoân khì hông chhiau-chhiau--khì, i cháu liáu kín, bô khì hông lia̍h--tio̍h, m̄-koh soah khì hông thong-chi̍p, i to̍h siūⁿ beh ōaⁿ chê só͘-chāi hoat-tián, chit sî tú-hó khòaⁿ tio̍h kok-ông siūⁿ beh chhōa-bó͘ ê bāng-ia̍h, hit tiuⁿ siòng-phìⁿ hoⁿh gōng-bīn-á gōng-bīn, khòaⁿ--khí-lâi to̍h ká-ná chok hó kòng ê phàn-á, i sûi to̍h ka tiám 1 ê ài-sim, sòa--lòe to̍h sī lán chìn-chêng kóng--ê, in to̍h sūn-lī kiat-hun--a.
Sui-bóng sī tú kiat-hun, m̄-koh kok-ông bô chiàm-iōng ông-hiō siuⁿ chē sî-kan, m̄-sī i bô tòng-thâu, chin-chiàⁿ sī kok-ông ê khang-khòe chiâⁿ chē, chin bô-êng. Kok-ông pài-thok chit ê tăⁿ chhōa ji̍p-mn̂g ê ông-hiō, chhin-sin khì kà Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú, ông-hiō sim-lāi teh siūⁿ: “Hăⁿ? Beh kiò góa khì kà kong-chú? Góa kan-na bat tī chà-phiàn chi̍p-thoân, kà chhài-chiáu-á án-chóaⁿ kâng phiàn neh.” Hoan-thâu koh siūⁿ kóng: “Mā sī ē-sái--lah, góa chiah-nī khiáu, o͘-pe̍h chòaⁿ mā èng-kai chún ē kòe, to̍h sǹg sī góa teh ho̍k-bū hō͘ góa phiàn ê kheh-hō͘ hó--ah.” Chū án-ne kā khang-khòe ín--lo̍h-lâi. Thâu 1 hôe siōng-khò, lesson one, kà lé-gî.
“Nā beh chò 1 ê siok-lú, put-koán sī khiā--leh, chē--leh, sīm-chì sī teh khû piān-só͘ ê sî, lóng ài tián-hiān chhut lí ê khì-chit.”
“Khû piān-só͘ a̍h bô-lâng khoàiⁿ--à, kám bē-tàng pàng khah khin-sang--leh?”
“Tiām--khì! Siok-lú sûi-sî lóng ài pah-hun chi pah ê oân-bí, koh chài-kóng, lí ná-ē chai-iáⁿ khû piān-só͘ to̍h bô lâng ē khòaⁿ, ah nā bān-put-jī ū lâng teh khòaⁿ--leh?”
“He to̍h piàn-thài--a, he nā khì hō͘ góa tú--tio̍h hoⁿh, to̍h kiò lâng kā i thoa-khì phah phah--leh, chiah tàn ji̍p-khì piān-só͘ chhiâng tiāu!”
“Tiām--khì! Siok-lú bē-sái sú-iōng po̍k-le̍k, world peace! Chò 1 ê siok-lú, sûi-sî lóng ài ū khì-chit, ài bīn-á chhiò-chhiò m̄-chiah tio̍h!”
“Ah lí nā sī pì-kiat--leh? Lí kám chhiò ē chhut--lâi?”
“Tiām--khì! Tiām--khì! Tiām--khì!”
Kok-ūi thiaⁿ-chiòng, in-ūi ông-hiō ê hiat-ap siuⁿ koân, bô-hoat-tō͘ koh sòa lŏe ián, góa khòaⁿ sî-kan mā chha-put-to--a, ah bô lán kin-á-ji̍t ê chiat-bo̍k to̍h seng kàu chia, kám-siā ta̍k-ke siu-thiaⁿ lán “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘”, “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú.” Chit ê kò͘-sū, sī iû lán Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok, Phian-kio̍k: Chiá-siông, Ián-chhut: Bí-leng, Im-ga̍k/Iáⁿ-phìⁿ: Niau-tāu, Jī-bō͘/Kàu-tùi: A-chin in ang. Kin-á-ji̍t ê kò͘-sū thiaⁿ liáu nā kám-kak ū chhù-bī, ài kā goán chhi̍h chán, chù-bûn, tàu soan-thoân o͘h!
--
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By Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek 做工á人工作室
講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】是做工á人工作室製作ê全新單元，歡迎收聽【白蔥á公主】，真ló͘-la̍t，真感謝。
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以下內容是漢羅kah pe̍h-ōe-jī原稿，有需要歡迎ta̍k-ke來參考。
【漢羅版】
各位線頂ê聽眾朋友，ta̍k-ê平安, ta̍k-ê好, 歡迎收聽做工á人phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h，我是主持人Bí-leng！講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】是做工á人工作室製作ê全新單元，今á日beh講--ê，是咱【白蔥á公主】第1集。Tī節目開始進前，kā ta̍k-ke提醒，手機á ài ka關--起-來，m̄通影響tio̍h別人…(手機á關--起-來是beh按怎聽)，o͘h，m̄是teh看電影hoⁿh，好，手機á ka開較大聲--leh，有趣味--ê，樓頂招樓腳，ta̍k-ke做～夥～聽！
古早古早，有1 ê美麗ê國家，雖罔m̄是kài好額，mā bē講足散赤，因為chit ê國家ê國王，有好好á teh做代誌，所以--à，百姓ê生活，過了算是bē-bái。國王kah王后in翁á某感情chiâⁿ好，m̄-koh in ê查某囝tăⁿ出世無偌久，王后to̍h破病過身--a。國王雖然真艱苦，m̄-koh看tio̍h chit ê tú出世ê公主，kah in阿母kāng款，皮膚白白白，目睭大大蕊，有夠古錐，伊to̍h真疼惜chit ê súi-tang-tang ê查某囝。
公主自細漢to̍h足iau鬼，看到食--ê to̍h會伸手，物件捎--leh to̍h ùi嘴--eh that，所以--à，伊猶m̄-bat代誌，tú會曉行ê時，to̍h知影桌巾真歹pō͘，蠟燭無好食，he椅á腳無滋味。伊3歲ê時陣，人koh感覺伊足古錐，有啥物好食物á to̍h攏the̍h hō͘--伊，看伊食kah hiah有滋味，ta̍k-ke mā感覺歡喜。M̄-koh伊實在siuⁿ iau-sâi，到伊5歲ê時，ta̍k-ke nā看tio̍h伊，to̍h ài趕緊kā食ê物件藏--起-來，bē輸去tú tio̍h iau死鬼！Tī chit ê國家，咱人一般nā相借問，攏會問講：「你食飽--未？」M̄-koh，nā是tú tio̍h公主，to̍h無人會án-ne kā伊ăi-siat-chuh，因為ta̍k-ke攏知影，伊永遠食bē飽。Ka-chài伊攏食bē大kho͘，瘦pi-pa，皮膚koh白蔥蔥，所以--à，人攏開始稱呼伊是「白蔥á公主」。
白蔥á公主真活潑，mā有人感覺伊足chiān，伊m̄-nā真興食，koh有2 ê歹習慣，第1 ê歹習慣to̍h是，伊足ài kâng鎖門，chit ê習慣是án怎來--ê？有1工hoⁿh，he廚房--ê驚伊偷食，kā門鎖--起-來，白蔥á公主tī外口撞門撞10分鐘，人to̍h走--ah，廚房ê總舖kah腳手想講伊放棄--ah，讚ŏ͘，想bē到料理做好，soah m̄知去hō͘ siáng鎖tī廚房內面，無法度出--去，國王1 ê人戇戇á坐tī餐廳，腹肚iau kah tân雷公，tī hia想講今á日暗頓nah會猶未chhoân好勢。Chit時hoⁿh，公主伊家己soah走去se̍h夜市á食雞排，koh配真珠奶茶。
第2 ê歹習慣to̍h是，伊手足chiān，伊足ài烏白捎別人ê寶貝物á來sńg，m̄-nā án-ne，伊定定sńg-sńg--leh，物件koh烏白擲，he人ê寶貝物á neh！有1 kái，白蔥á公主走去街á lōa-lōa趖，管區--ê派2 ê警察teh ka保護，伊看tio̍h警察ê褲袋á khǹg 1副手銬，感覺好奇，to̍h ka借來sńg，警察看公主kā手銬the̍h懸懸，ná笑ná tī hia跳舞，看--起-來實在有夠古錐，想bē到伊1-ē戇神，白蔥á公主soah m̄知走tó去，因為án-ne，hit 2 ê警察去hō͘主管罵kah臭頭，koh較淒慘--ê是，hit工e晡，hit ê警察去掠賊偷，jiok 1000公尺了後，總算是掠tio̍h人，chit時chiah發見手銬hō͘白蔥á公主借去sńg，soah無hâiⁿ--伊，tú掠--tio̍h ê賊偷koh去ho͘走--去，實在有夠衰。Hit工beh暗ê時，有1 ê生理人，擔tú收好勢，趕緊beh轉去放尿，趕到厝，鎖匙the̍h--出-來，soah看tio̍h in tau大門ê鎖頂頭，ke鎖1副手銬，hit工，kui條街á ê人攏聽tio̍h有人tī hia大聲喝講：
「我beh放尿，我beh放尿--lah！」
日子過了chiâⁿ緊，白蔥á公主1工1工á大漢，面模á mā愈來愈水，愈來愈親像in阿母，猶m̄-koh kah in阿母無kāng--ê是，伊soah愈來愈chiān。雖罔伊規工tī hia變鬼變怪，造成別人ê困擾，m̄-koh水姑娘á生成to̍h較占贏，ta̍k kái若舞啥物代誌出--來，只要伊嘴舌thó͘--1-ē，目睭nih--1-ē，笑笑á講：
「歹勢--lah！」
看tio̍h伊he古錐ê笑面，to̍h無人ē kah伊計較。一直到伊14歲ê時陣，伊ê迷眾頁竟然有超過180萬ê fans，全世界mā kan-na外國ê 1 ê天團，hō做「炸彈少女團」--ê，比白蔥á公主ke 20萬ê fans niâ。雖然伊chiah-nī受歡迎，m̄-koh，國王soah有淡薄á煩惱：
「Aih，chit ê白蔥á公主hoⁿh，siuⁿ活潑，公主m̄ to̍h ài較有氣質--leh！是講ā莫怪--lah！In老母早早to̍h過身，我上班閣足無閒，定定放伊1 ê四界拋拋走，chiah會變kah袂輸野馬--leh。Cha̍p…袂使，閣按呢落--去，我真正ē kā伊sēng歹--去。不如…我koh來chhōa--1-ê，有1 ê序大tòe tī伊身軀邊ka教，應該是ē較好--li。」
國王kā手伸入去伊ê褲袋á，tī hia lā--leh lā--leh，kā伊ê Pa̍t-á牌手機á jîm--出-來，年初chiah新推出，上新上大支ê hit支。伊kā手機á chhi̍h--開，點入去婚姻紹介ê網站，申請1 ê口座，to̍h開始beh寫伊ê個人資料。Hit時，伊看tio̍h網頁邊--á顯示ê統計：「本網站配對，上得人意愛ê頭路：頭名，工程師，第2名，公務人員。」國王心內to̍h teh想講：
「Hit ê工程師hoⁿh，高科技，he我m̄-bat，m̄-koh我mā算是1 ê公務人員--ā，應該有機會--lah！」
想想--eh，伊to̍h tī個人資料ê職業欄，輸入「國王」chit ê職業，sòa--lòe伊koh tī手機á內面，chhōe tio̍h 1張伊18年前ê相片，傳--起-lih。資料攏chhoân好勢，送--出-去，想講舞chiah久，beh叫人kā伊chhoân chê bì-luh，chit時手機á「叮」1聲，發來配對成功ê通知，koh來「叮、叮叮叮、叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮叮」，he聲音soah一直叫，叫bē恬，伊趕緊kā手機á the̍h起來看，óa，不得了，竟然有四、五百ê查某會員，對伊有興趣。
伊kā hit kóa配對ê資料點開來看，頭1位，to̍h看tio̍h 1 ê穿烏色膨裙，妝畫了chiâⁿ水，看--起-來足khiàng腳ê查某人。Hit ê查某人ê自我紹介，tah真濟伊四界旅行、食高級料理ê相片，koh講伊bat chiâⁿ濟大頭家，真gâu投資，趁足濟錢，taⁿ已經30外歲--ah，想beh chhōe 1 ê認真對待--伊，會使鬥陣過1世人ê翁婿，落尾koh寫1條
「真正有心，chiah kah我聯絡，nā是想beh sńg-sńg--eh準tú soah--ê，勞煩你去chhōe別人！」
國王看tio̍h真kah意，chiah-nī-á khiàng腳ê查某人，一定ē-tàng做白蔥á公主ê好chhōa頭，想tio̍h che，伊to̍h趕緊chhōe「我有興趣」hit粒chhi̍h鈕ka chhi̍h--lòe，準備beh約chit ê穿烏色膨裙ê查某人出來見面。經過九九81點鐘，in to̍h結婚--a。
Chit ê新ê王后，人足有禮貌，氣質真好，ah m̄-koh，he攏是伊假--出-來-ê，其實伊少年ê時陣，teh替烏道做仙人跳，年歲較大了後，to̍h去做詐騙集團ê成員，後--來集團去hông chhiau-chhiau--去，伊走了緊，無去hông掠--tio̍h，m̄-koh soah去hông通緝，伊to̍h想beh換chê所在發展，chit時tú好看tio̍h國王想beh chhōa某ê網頁，hit張相片hoⁿh戇面á戇面，看--起-來to̍h ká-ná足好kòng ê盼á，伊隨to̍h ka點1 ê愛心，sòa--lòe to̍h是咱進前講--ê，in to̍h順利結婚--a。
雖罔是tú結婚，m̄-koh國王無佔用王后siuⁿ濟時間，m̄是伊無擋頭，真正是國王ê工課chiâⁿ濟，真無閒。國王拜託chit ê tăⁿ chhōa入門ê王后，親身去教白蔥á公主，王后心內teh想：
「Hăⁿ？Beh叫我去教公主？我kan-na bat tī詐騙集團，教菜鳥á án怎kâng騙neh。」
翻頭koh想講：
「Mā是會使--lah，我chiah-nī巧，烏白chòaⁿ mā應該準會過，to̍h算是我teh服務hō͘我騙ê客戶好--ah。」
自án-ne kā工課ín--落-來。頭1回上課，lesson one，教禮儀。
「若beh做1 ê淑女，不管是khiā--leh，坐--leh，甚至是teh khû便所ê時，攏ài展現出你ê氣質。」
「Khû便所a̍h無人khoàiⁿ--à，kám bē-tàng放較輕鬆--leh？」
「恬--去！淑女隨時攏ài百分之百ê完美，閣再講，你哪會知影khû便所to̍h無人會看，ah nā萬不二有人teh看--leh？」
「He to̍h變態--a，he nā去hō͘我tú--tio̍h hoⁿh，to̍h叫人kā伊拖去phah phah--leh，chiah擲入去便所沖掉！」
「恬--去！淑女bē使使用暴力，world peace！做1 ê淑女，隨時攏ài有氣質，ài面á笑笑m̄-chiah tio̍h！」
「Ah你nā是秘結--leh？你kám笑ē出--來？」
「恬--去！恬--去！恬--去！」
各位聽眾，因為王后ê血壓siuⁿ懸，無法度閣sòa lŏe演，我看時間mā差不多--a，ah無咱今á日ê節目to̍h先到chia，
感謝ta̍k-ke收聽咱狡怪囡á古，白蔥á公主。
Chit ê故事，是由咱做工á人工作室製作，編劇：Chiá-siông，演出：Bí-leng，音樂／影片：Niau-tāu，字幕／校對：A-chin in ang。今á日ê故事聽了若感覺有趣味，ài kā阮chhi̍h讚，注文，tàu宣傳o͘h！Ló͘-la̍t！再會！
【Pe̍h-ōe-jī pán】
Kok-ūi sòaⁿ-téng ê thiaⁿ-chiòng pêng-iú, ta̍k-ê pêng-an, ta̍k-ê hó, hoan-gêng siu-thiaⁿ Chò-kang-á-lâng phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h, góa sī chú-chhî-jîn Bí-leng! Kóng chhù-bī ê Tâi-gí, chò chhù-bī ê tāi-chì, “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘” sī Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok ê choân-sin tan-goân, kin-á-ji̍t beh kóng--ê, sī lán “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú” tē 1 chi̍p. Tī chiat-bo̍k khai-sí chìn-chêng, kā ta̍k-ke thê-chhéⁿ, chhiú-ki-á ài ka koaiⁿ--khí-lâi, m̄-thang éng-hióng tio̍h pa̍t-lâng… “Chhiú-ki-á koaiⁿ--khí-lâi sī beh án-chóaⁿ thiaⁿ”, o͘h, m̄ sī teh khòaⁿ tiān-iáⁿ hoⁿh, hó, chhiú-ki-á ka khui khah tōa-siaⁿ--leh, ū chhù-bī--ê, lâu-téng chio lâu-kha, ta̍k-ke chò-hóe thiaⁿ!
Kó͘-chá kó͘-chá, ū 1 ê bí-lē ê kok-ka, sui-bóng m̄ sī kài hó-gia̍h, mā bē kóng chiok sàn-chhiah, in-ūi chit ê kok-ka ê kok-ông, ū hó-hó-á teh chò tāi-chì, só͘-í--à, peh-sèⁿ ê seng-oa̍h, kòe liáu sǹg sī bē-bái. Kok-ông kah ông-hiō in ang-á-bó͘ kám-chêng chiâⁿ hó, m̄-koh in ê cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ tăⁿ chhut-sì bô jōa-kú, ông-hiō to̍h phòa-pēⁿ kòe-sin--a. Kok-ông sui-jiân chin kan-khó͘, m̄-koh khòaⁿ tio̍h chit ê tú chhut-sì ê kong-chú, kah in a-bú kāng-khoán, phôe-hu pe̍h-pe̍h-pe̍h, ba̍k-chiu tōa-tōa lúi, ū kàu kó͘-chui, i to̍h chin thiàⁿ-sioh chit ê súi-tang-tang ê cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ.
Kong-chú chū sè-hàn to̍h chiok iau-kúi, khòaⁿ-tio̍h chia̍h--ê to̍h ē chhun-chhiú, mi̍h-kiāⁿ sa--leh to̍h ùi chhùi--eh that, só͘-í--à, i iáu m̄-bat tāi-chì, tú ē-hiáu kiâⁿ ê sî, to̍h chai-iáⁿ toh-kin chin pháiⁿ pō͘, la̍h-chek bô hó chia̍h, he í-á-kha bô chu-bī. I 3 hòe ê sî-chūn, lâng koh kám-kak i chiok kó͘-chui, ū siáⁿ-mih hó-chia̍h-mih-á to̍h lóng the̍h hō͘--i, khòaⁿ i chia̍h kah hiah ū chu-bī, ta̍k-ke mā kám-kak hoaⁿ-hí. M̄-koh i si̍t-chāi siuⁿ iau-sâi, kàu i 5 hòe ê sî, ta̍k-ke nā khòaⁿ-tio̍h i, to̍h ài kóaⁿ-kín kā chia̍h ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ chhàng--khí-lâi, bē-su khì tú tio̍h iau-sí-kúi! Tī chit ê kok-ka, lán lâng it-poaⁿ nā sio-chioh-mn̄g, lóng ē mn̄g kóng: “Lí chia̍h pá--bē?” M̄-koh, nā sī tú tio̍h kong-chú, to̍h bô lâng ē án-ne kā i ăi-siat-chuh, in-ūi ta̍k-ke lóng chai-iáⁿ, i éng-oán chia̍h bē pá. Ka-chài i lóng chia̍h bē tōa-kho͘, sán-pi-pa, phôe-hu koh pe̍h-chhang-chhang, só͘-í--à, lâng lóng khai-sí chheng-ho͘ i sī “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú”.
Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú chin oa̍h-phoat, mā ū lâng kám-kak i chiok chiān, i m̄-nā chin hèng chia̍h, koh ū 2 ê pháiⁿ si̍p-koàn, tē 1 ê pháiⁿ si̍p-koàn to̍h sī, i chiok ài kâng só-mn̂g, chit ê si̍p-koàn sī án-chóaⁿ lâi--ê? Ū 1 kang hoⁿh, he tû-pâng--ê kiaⁿ i thau-chia̍h, kā mn̂g só--khí-lâi, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú tī gōa-kháu lòng-mn̂g lóng 10 hun-cheng, lâng to̍h cháu--ah, tû-pâng ê chóng-phò͘ kah kha-chhiú siūⁿ-kóng i hòng-khì--ah, chán ŏ͘, siūⁿ bē-kàu liāu-lí chò hó, soah m̄ chai khì hō͘ siáng só tī tû-pâng lāi-bīn, bô-hoat-tō͘ chhut--khì, kok-ông 1 ê lâng gōng-gōng-á chē tī chhan-thiaⁿ, pak-tó͘ iau kah tân lûi-kong, tī hia siūⁿ-kóng kin-á-ji̍t àm-tǹg neh ē iáu-bē chhoân hó sè. Chit sî hoⁿh, kong-chú i ka-tī soah cháu-khì se̍h iā-chhī-á chia̍h ke-pâi, koh phòe chin-chu leng-tê.
Tē 2 ê pháiⁿ si̍p-koàn to̍h sī, i chhiú chiok chiān, i chiok ài o͘-pe̍h sa pa̍t-lâng ê pó-pòe mih-á lâi sńg, m̄-nā án-ne, i tiāⁿ-tiāⁿ sńg-sńg--leh, mi̍h-kiāⁿ koh o͘-pe̍h tàn, he lâng ê pó-pòe mih-á neh! Ū 1 kái, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú cháu khì ke-á lōa-lōa-sô, koán-khu--ê phài 2 ê kéng-chhat teh ka pó-hō͘, i khòaⁿ tio̍h kéng-chhat ê khò͘-tē-á khǹg 1 hù chhiú-khàu, kám-kak hòⁿ-kî, to̍h ka chioh lâi sńg, kéng-chhat khòaⁿ kong-chú kā chhiú-khàu the̍h koân-koân, ná chhiò ná tī hia thiàu-bú, khòaⁿ--khí-lâi si̍t-chāi ū-kàu kó͘-chui, siūⁿ bē-kàu i 1-ē gōng-sîn, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú soah m̄-chai cháu tó khì, in-ūi án-ne, hit 2 ê kéng-chhat khì hō͘ chú-koán mē kah chhàu-thâu, koh khah chhi-chhám--ê sī, hit kang e-po͘, hit ê kéng-chhat khì lia̍h chha̍t-thau, jiok 1000 kong-chhioh liáu-āu, chóng-sǹg sī lia̍h tio̍h lâng, chit sî chiah hoat-kiàn chhiú-khàu hō͘ Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú chioh khì sńg, soah bô hâiⁿ--i, tú lia̍h--tio̍h ê chha̍t-thau koh khì ho͘ cháu--khì, si̍t-chāi ū-kàu soe. Hit kang beh àm ê sî, ū 1 ê seng-lí-lâng, tàⁿ tú siu hó-sè, kóaⁿ-kín beh tńg-khì pàng-jiō, kóaⁿ kàu chhù, só-sî the̍h--chhut-lâi, soah khòaⁿ tio̍h in tau tōa-mn̂g ê só téng-thâu, ke só 1 hù chhiú-khàu, hit kang, kui-tiâu ke-á ê lâng lóng thiaⁿ tio̍h ū lâng tī hia tōa-siaⁿ hoah kóng: “Góa beh pàng-jiō, góa beh pàng-jiō--lah!”
Ji̍t-chí kòe liáu chiâⁿ kín, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú 1 kang 1 kang-á tōa-hàn, bīn-bô͘-á mā jú lâi jú súi, jú lâi jú chhin-chhiūⁿ in a-bú, iáu m̄-koh kah in a-bú bô kāng--ê sī, i soah jú lâi jú chiān, sui-bóng i kui-kang tī hia pìⁿ-kúi-pìⁿ-koài, chō-sêng pa̍t-lâng ê khùn-jiáu, m̄-koh súi ko͘-niû-á siⁿ-sêng to̍h khah chiàm iâⁿ, ta̍k kái nā bú siáⁿ-mih tāi-chì chhut--lâi, chí-iàu i chhùi-chi̍h thó͘--1-ē, ba̍k-chiu nih--1-ē, chhiò-chhiò-á kóng: “Pháiⁿ-sè--lah!” Khòaⁿ tio̍h i he kó͘-chui ê chhiò-bīn, to̍h bô lâng ē kah i kè-kàu. It-ti̍t kàu i 14 hòe ê sî-chūn, i ê bê-chiòng-ia̍h kèng-jiân ū chhiau-kòe 180 bān ê fans, choân sè-kài mā kan-na gōa-kok ê 1 ê thian-thoân, hō chò “Chà-tân Siàu-lú-thoân”--ê, pí Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ke 20 bān ê fans niâ. Sui-jiân i chiah-nī siū hoan-gêng, m̄-koh, kok-ông soah ū tām-po̍h-á hoân-ló: “Aih, chit ê Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú hoⁿh, siuⁿ oa̍h-phoat, kong-chú m̄ to̍h ài khah ū khì-chit--leh! Sī kóng ā bo̍k-koài--lah! In lāu-bú chá-chá to̍h kòe-sin, góa siōng pan koh chiok bô-êng, tiāⁿ-tiāⁿ pàng i 1 ê sì-kè pha-pha-cháu, chiah ē piàn kah bē-su iá-bé--leh. Cha̍p…bē-sái, koh án-ne lo̍h--khì, góa chin-chiàⁿ ē kā i sēng pháiⁿ--khì. Put-jû…góa koh lâi chhōa--1-ê, ū 1 ê sī-tōa tòe tī i sin-khu piⁿ ka kà, èng-kai sī ē khah hó--li.”
Kok-ông kā chhiú chhun ji̍p-khì i ê khò͘-tē-á, tī hia lā--leh lā--leh, kā i ê Pa̍t-á pâi chhiú-ki-á jîm--chhut-lâi, nî-chhe chiah sin thui-chhut, siōng sin siōng tōa ki ê hit ki. I kā chhiú-ki-á chhi̍h--khui, tiám ji̍p khì hun-in siāu-kài ê bāng-chām, sin-chhéng 1 ê kháu-chō, to̍h khai-sí beh siá i ê kò-jîn chu-liāu. Hit sî, i khòaⁿ tio̍h bāng-ia̍h piⁿ--á hián-sī ê thóng-kè: “Pún bāng-chām phòe-tùi, siōng tit lâng ì-ài ê thâu-lō͘: Thâu-miâ, kang-têng-su, tē 2 miâ, kong-bū jîn-oân.” Kok-ông sim-lāi to̍h teh siūⁿ kóng: “Hit ê kang-têng-su hoⁿh, ko-kho-ki, he góa m̄-bat, m̄-koh góa mā sǹg sī 1 ê kong-bū jîn-oân--ā, èng-kai ū ki-hōe--lah!” Siūⁿ-siūⁿ--eh, i to̍h tī kò-jîn chu-liāu ê chit-gia̍p nôa, su-ji̍p “Kok-ông” chit ê chit-gia̍p, sòa--lòe i koh tī chhiú-ki-á lāi-bīn, chhōe tio̍h 1 tiuⁿ i 18 nî-chêng ê siòng-phìⁿ, thoân--khí-lih. Chu-liāu lóng chhoân hó-sè, sàng--chhut-khì, siūⁿ kóng bú chiah kú, beh kiò lâng kā i chhoân chê bì-luh, chit-sî chhiú-ki-á “tin” 1 siaⁿ, hoat lâi phòe-tùi sêng-kong ê thong-ti, koh lâi “tin, tin tin tin, tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin tin”, he siaⁿ-im soah it-ti̍t kiò, kiò bē tiām, i kóaⁿ-kín kā chhiú-ki-á the̍h khí-lâi khòaⁿ, óa, put-tek-liáu, kèng-jiân ū 4, 5 pah ê cha-bó͘ hōe-oân, tùi i ū hèng-chhù.
I kā hit kóa phòe-tùi ê chu-liāu tiám khui lâi khòaⁿ, thâu 1 ūi, to̍h khòaⁿ tio̍h 1 ê chhēng o͘-sek phòng-kûn, chng ōe liáu chiâⁿ súi, khòaⁿ--khí-lâi chiok khiàng-kha ê cha-bó͘-lâng. Hit ê cha-bó͘-lâng ê chū-ngó͘ siāu-kài, tah chin chē i sì-kè lú-hêng, chia̍h ko-kip liāu-lí ê siòng-phìⁿ, koh kóng i bat chiâⁿ chē tōa thâu-ke, chin gâu tâu-chu, thàn chok chē chîⁿ, taⁿ í-keng 30 gōa hòe--ah, siūⁿ beh chhōe 1 ê jīn-chin tùi-thāi--i, ē-sái tàu-tīn kòe 1 sì lâng ê ang-sài, lo̍h-bóe koh siá 1 tiâu “Chin-chiàⁿ ū sim, chiah kah góa liân-lo̍k, nā sī siūⁿ beh sńg-sńg--eh chún tú soah--ê, lô-hoân lí khì chhōe pa̍t-lâng!” Kok-ông khòaⁿ tio̍h chin kah-ì, chiah-nī-á khiàng-kha ê cha-bó͘-lâng, it-tēng ē-tàng chò Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ê hó chhōa-thâu, siūⁿ tio̍h che, i to̍h kóaⁿ-kín chhōe “Góa ū hèng-chhù” hit lia̍p chhi̍h liú ka chhi̍h--lòe, chún-pī beh iok chit ê chhēng o͘-sek phòng-kûn ê cha-bó͘-lâng chhut-lâi kìⁿ-bīn. Keng-kòe kiú kiú 81 tiám-cheng, in to̍h kiat-hun--a.
Chit ê sin ê ông-hiō, lâng chok ū lé-māu, khì-chit chin hó, ah m̄-koh, he lóng sī i ké--chhut-lâi-ê, kî-si̍t i siàu-liân ê sî-chūn, teh thè o͘-tō chò sian-jîn-thiàu, nî-hòe khah tōa liáu-āu, to̍h khì chò chà-phiàn chi̍p-thoân ê sêng-oân, āu--lâi chi̍p-thoân khì hông chhiau-chhiau--khì, i cháu liáu kín, bô khì hông lia̍h--tio̍h, m̄-koh soah khì hông thong-chi̍p, i to̍h siūⁿ beh ōaⁿ chê só͘-chāi hoat-tián, chit sî tú-hó khòaⁿ tio̍h kok-ông siūⁿ beh chhōa-bó͘ ê bāng-ia̍h, hit tiuⁿ siòng-phìⁿ hoⁿh gōng-bīn-á gōng-bīn, khòaⁿ--khí-lâi to̍h ká-ná chok hó kòng ê phàn-á, i sûi to̍h ka tiám 1 ê ài-sim, sòa--lòe to̍h sī lán chìn-chêng kóng--ê, in to̍h sūn-lī kiat-hun--a.
Sui-bóng sī tú kiat-hun, m̄-koh kok-ông bô chiàm-iōng ông-hiō siuⁿ chē sî-kan, m̄-sī i bô tòng-thâu, chin-chiàⁿ sī kok-ông ê khang-khòe chiâⁿ chē, chin bô-êng. Kok-ông pài-thok chit ê tăⁿ chhōa ji̍p-mn̂g ê ông-hiō, chhin-sin khì kà Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú, ông-hiō sim-lāi teh siūⁿ: “Hăⁿ? Beh kiò góa khì kà kong-chú? Góa kan-na bat tī chà-phiàn chi̍p-thoân, kà chhài-chiáu-á án-chóaⁿ kâng phiàn neh.” Hoan-thâu koh siūⁿ kóng: “Mā sī ē-sái--lah, góa chiah-nī khiáu, o͘-pe̍h chòaⁿ mā èng-kai chún ē kòe, to̍h sǹg sī góa teh ho̍k-bū hō͘ góa phiàn ê kheh-hō͘ hó--ah.” Chū án-ne kā khang-khòe ín--lo̍h-lâi. Thâu 1 hôe siōng-khò, lesson one, kà lé-gî.
“Nā beh chò 1 ê siok-lú, put-koán sī khiā--leh, chē--leh, sīm-chì sī teh khû piān-só͘ ê sî, lóng ài tián-hiān chhut lí ê khì-chit.”
“Khû piān-só͘ a̍h bô-lâng khoàiⁿ--à, kám bē-tàng pàng khah khin-sang--leh?”
“Tiām--khì! Siok-lú sûi-sî lóng ài pah-hun chi pah ê oân-bí, koh chài-kóng, lí ná-ē chai-iáⁿ khû piān-só͘ to̍h bô lâng ē khòaⁿ, ah nā bān-put-jī ū lâng teh khòaⁿ--leh?”
“He to̍h piàn-thài--a, he nā khì hō͘ góa tú--tio̍h hoⁿh, to̍h kiò lâng kā i thoa-khì phah phah--leh, chiah tàn ji̍p-khì piān-só͘ chhiâng tiāu!”
“Tiām--khì! Siok-lú bē-sái sú-iōng po̍k-le̍k, world peace! Chò 1 ê siok-lú, sûi-sî lóng ài ū khì-chit, ài bīn-á chhiò-chhiò m̄-chiah tio̍h!”
“Ah lí nā sī pì-kiat--leh? Lí kám chhiò ē chhut--lâi?”
“Tiām--khì! Tiām--khì! Tiām--khì!”
Kok-ūi thiaⁿ-chiòng, in-ūi ông-hiō ê hiat-ap siuⁿ koân, bô-hoat-tō͘ koh sòa lŏe ián, góa khòaⁿ sî-kan mā chha-put-to--a, ah bô lán kin-á-ji̍t ê chiat-bo̍k to̍h seng kàu chia, kám-siā ta̍k-ke siu-thiaⁿ lán “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘”, “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú.” Chit ê kò͘-sū, sī iû lán Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok, Phian-kio̍k: Chiá-siông, Ián-chhut: Bí-leng, Im-ga̍k/Iáⁿ-phìⁿ: Niau-tāu, Jī-bō͘/Kàu-tùi: A-chin in ang. Kin-á-ji̍t ê kò͘-sū thiaⁿ liáu nā kám-kak ū chhù-bī, ài kā goán chhi̍h chán, chù-bûn, tàu soan-thoân o͘h!
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