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【白蔥仔公主】EP02-王后掠狂--了 台語白話字 Tâi-gí POJ (Pe̍h-ōe-jī)
講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】是做工á人工作室製作ê全新單元，歡迎收聽【白蔥á公主】，真ló͘-la̍t，真感謝。
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以下內容是漢羅kah pe̍h-ōe-jī原稿，有需要歡迎ta̍k-ke來參考。
【漢羅版】
各位線頂ê聽眾朋友，ta̍k-ê平安, ta̍k-ê好, 歡迎收聽做工á人phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h，我是主持人Bí-leng！講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】chit ê節目是由咱做工á人工作室製作，今á日beh講--ê，是咱「白蔥á公主」第2集，王后teh kā公主上課。Eh！老師teh講話，ta̍k-ke ài認真聽heh！
頭1工kā公主上課，che王后假--出-來ê氣質，to̍h演bē落--去，伊想講：「Chit-má ê gín-á是án怎haⁿh？Nah ē chiah歹教！Goán細漢ê時陣nah有án-ne！」
第2工，lesson two，教經濟。王后想tio̍h講：「我做詐騙kâng諞錢，錢ùi別人ê褲袋á走ùi我chia來，che to̍h是1種經濟ê流通--ā！我趁tio̍h錢，捎去烏白開，買我kah意ê皮包á，這tio̍h是市場ê需求，廠商to̍h會出閣較濟、閣較好看ê皮包á來賣--我，che to̍h是供給。有需求，有供給，chit ê皮包á ê市場m̄-chiah發展會起--來。」Nā是講tio̍h kah錢有關係ê代誌，che王后to̍h真正有伊ê專業，m̄-koh伊閣bē-tàng kā伊拐錢ê經驗the̍h出來臭屁，伊to̍h想講ài用簡單ê方式，來教白蔥á公主。王后準備1 ê 50 kho͘ ê銅sián，hâm 1籃蘋果，伊kā銅sián khǹg tī白蔥á公主面頭前，閣oa̍t頭去the̍h 1粒蘋果，tú beh kā蘋果khǹg tī桌頂ê時，soah看tio̍h公主kā tú-chiah hit ê 50 kho͘，tē入去伊ê lak袋á內底，連1聲多謝都無講。
王后hoah：「Eh！He是教材neh，the̍h--出-來！」
想bē到公主soah對伊hàiⁿ頭，笑笑á應講：「母后，你ê氣質--leh？氣質，來，tòe我講1遍，氣質。」
王后是氣kah phi̍h-phi̍h-chhoah，m̄-koh伊是專業ê諞仙á，伊硬ka忍--落-來，手伸入去lak袋á內底，閣the̍h另外1 ê 10 kho͘ ê銀角á出--來，oa̍t頭soah看tio̍h公主手伸長長，準備beh kā銀角á接--過-來，koh較hàm--ê是，tú-chiah khǹg桌頂hit粒蘋果，已經ho͘捎去khè kah chhun 1半--ah！王后氣kah kiōng-beh斷腦筋，大聲詈：「你chit ê不受教ê iau鬼死gín-á！」
想bē到白蔥á公主目睭thí kah足大蕊，手指伊ê鼻á講：「你…你竟然kā我罵，你kám m̄知影goán老爸是siáng？Ŏ͘-ò͘，我to̍h知，你ê氣質是假--出-來-ê，我…我beh去kā goán阿爸講！」
講soah，白蔥á公主to̍h ùi教室chông--出-去，tùi王后身軀邊走--過ê時，koh順手kā hit籃蘋果捎--去，chit聲，王后ê詐騙資金hâm裝備攏去hông拐了了，供給、需求，hâm市場，規ê總害--去。伊氣kah強beh吐血，m̄-koh伊真緊to̍h冷靜--落-siàⁿ來，想講：「我to̍h猶未ùi國王hia騙tio̍h錢，chit-má koh加了50 kho͘，bē用--chit，代誌絕對bē-tàng tī這時piak-khang！」王后裙腳láng--起-來，趕緊走去chhōe國王，伊衝kah chok青狂，走kah bē-hù假淑女，一直到走入去國王ê辦公室，看tio̍h國王真無閒，khû tī邊á teh phah電動，王后chiah趕緊身軀khiā ho͘直，激kah真大範真優雅。國王聽tio̍h聲，頭giâ--起-來，問伊講：「Honey，啥代誌？」「Ĕ？Ah白蔥á公主--leh？伊nah會無tī chia？」
當時á咱白蔥á公主，ùi教室chông--出-去了後，to̍h bē記tit beh創啥，伊想都無想，直接ùi廚房chông--去，the̍h hit籃蘋果，kah人換2 ki雞腿，實現上原始ê交易，人類ê經濟to̍h是án-ne發展--起-來-ê，而且伊ê服務koh足好，「He籃á我sa-bì-suh--ê，免細膩。」講soah，1 ki雞腿the̍h tī手頭，另外1 ki直接that tī嘴--ni̍h，oa̍t--leh to̍h閣出--去。Beh離開ê時，廚房ê門koh順sòa tùi外口ka鎖--起-來。
講轉來王后chit pêng，雖罔白蔥á公主無來chia tâu伊假pai，m̄-koh伊感覺tio̍h先kā國王注1-ē-á預防siā。王后kā國王講：「咱chit ê查某囝hoⁿh，真正是細漢歹育飼，大漢歹教示--lah，伊足愛講白賊，伊若是kā你講啥，你千萬to̍h m̄通信。」
國王ná phah電動ná應講：「Taⁿ你是teh講啥？伊細漢時a̍h m̄是你育飼--ê。」
王后koh想beh講話，國王soah sòa-lŏe講：「雖罔伊有淡薄á較皮，m̄-koh逐家攏足愛--伊。愛kah啥物程度--o͘h？親像咱王宮舊年ê尾牙，頭賞是啥hō͘妳ioh，是公主ê簽名相片！伊koh足搭心，加kah 1腳伊穿--過ê襪á，逐家攏想beh抽tio̍h hit ê獎品--nē！」
「Hăⁿ？襪á？哪會kan-na 1腳？」
「Ah to̍h伊襪á thǹg--落-來to̍h烏白擲，1腳phàng見，chhun--ê hit腳to̍h捎來做獎品--ā。」
「Án-ne mā會使o͘h？」
「我kā你講，chhun 1腳算bē-bái--ah，有時hoⁿh，伊規雙攏會使phah無--去-o͘h！」
王后想講：「你chhōa我來做某，kan-na kā我講你有1 ê水查某囝，mā無kā我講lín查某囝是1 ê習慣hiah-nī bái ê猴死gín-á，kám講…我去tú-tio̍h詐騙？」
國王koh講：「尤其是伊ê fans hoⁿh，對伊真好，hō͘伊chiâⁿ濟tō͘-né o͘h，你看伊平常時四界teh買sì-siù-á，攏是食伊家己趁--ê neh。Chhun ê錢，我to̍h ka當做是紅包，ka收收--khài，替伊保管。一直到舊年，咱chit ê國家，有百分之二十ê預算，是開白蔥á公主ê tō͘-né--lah！」
王后驚1 tiô，想講：「Ăⁿ？M̄是講替伊保管？Ná-ē chŏaⁿ ka the̍h去做預算？害--ā害--ā害--ā，chit kho͘ chiah-nī無良心，我真正去tú-tio̍h詐騙--ah！」
王后想想--leh，koh問講：「伊舞he啥物迷眾頁，做he啥物網chhèng，he kám真正足好趁？」
「He到底是啥，我mā m̄知，m̄-koh伊真正趁bē少--lah。」話講了，國王to̍h繼續tī hia無閒phah電動，心神攏ho͘鉤鉤--去，kan-na注意teh看電視畫面內底hit仙ang-á，tī hia跳--1-ē 跳--1-ē，tin-tong，ŏ͘-ò͘，1百分！
看國王無koh講話，王后mā頭oat--leh行--出-去，伊一直teh想頭tú-á聽--tio̍h-ê，講he公主趁真濟，王后to̍h想講：「Hò͘ⁿ，伊規工顧teh食，無代無誌to̍h tī hia hip啥物chiú-mi ê相片，án-ne to̍h會使趁錢o͘h？Che真正無天理！不如，我家己mā來做網chhèng。」
王后to̍h家己去申請1 ê迷眾頁，hō做「全世界上水ê王后」，伊本底to̍h真gâu妝，koh學少年gín-á cosplay，ta̍k工穿無kāng軀衫，tī hia假伊足有氣質，he相片hip了，先用PS kā伊處理--過，PS了後，chiah koh PS，to̍h án-ne舞規個月，伊ê fans hoⁿh，總算是增加到87 ê！王后足歡喜，伊若是beh piàⁿ過白蔥á公主，kan-na差…180萬ê fans niâ。Sòa--lòe伊連去白蔥á公主ê網頁看，看tio̍h公主chăng傳1張相片，相片內面，伊嘴--ni̍h咬1支烘煙腸，正手koh比1 ê chiú-mi，若m̄是tò手beh the̍h手機á hip相，凡勢伊會tī hia挖鼻孔！To̍h hit張相片hoⁿh，ùi chăng到chit-má，已經hông chhi̍h kah 50萬ê讚--ah neh！王后氣kah beh死，氣~kah beh死，lín祖媽kám會輸hō͘你chit ê死gín-á？
王后ê怨妒對白蔥á公主完全無影響，伊人猶原是規châng好好。一直到有1工，王后hō͘人鎖tī伊家己ê房間內，氣kah beh害--去，自án-ne心肝掠坦橫，決定beh kā公主創ho͘死。伊to̍h開始暗中安排1寡代誌，便nā有機會，to̍h tī國王耳孔邊講1寡閒á話。
自án-ne，總算是等到hit 1日，國王kā白蔥á公主叫--過-去，講：「你hoⁿh，大人大種--ah，mài規工kan-na會曉tī hia póe手機á，舞啥物迷眾頁，你tio̍h ài ná學看án怎處理公事，替人民服務。」
公主聽了有淡薄á受氣，我經營迷眾頁是閣án怎--ah，你家己m̄是mā規工tī hia teh phah電動！
Chit時王后跳出來講：「我聽講樹林á內底有人佔用國有地，tī hia起別莊，無你派咱chit ê寶貝á公主去調查看māi，hō͘伊hoⁿh，有1寡正經代誌通做。」
公主無想beh做代誌，m̄-koh王后teh伊耳空邊，ka講細聲話：「乖，我叫人chhōa你去食好料--ê。」
聽tio̍h食好料，公主隨應好，王后閣講：「你免煩惱，我派1 ê殺手…m̄是，是護衛hâm你去。」
王后手ia̍t--1-ē，to̍h看tio̍h 1 ê面有1蜞ê查甫人行--入-來，公主看chit ê生份人，講：「Ĕ？Chit ê人我nah ē m̄-bat看--過？」
「伊外包--ê-lah。」
To̍h án-ne，公主hâm chit ê生份人，chah 2粒便當，行出城門，ùi樹林á行--入-去。
Hó͘--ò͘！林á內ê樹á發kah有夠ōm，kā公主in 2人cha̍h-tiâu--leh，看無影，聽無聲，害我soah m̄知欲講啥，ah無咱今á日ê節目to̍h先講到chia，感謝ta̍k-ke收聽咱狡怪囡á古，白蔥á公主！
Chit ê故事，是由咱做工á人工作室製作，編劇：Chiá-siông，演出：Bí-leng，音樂／影片：Niau-tāu，字幕／校對：A-chin in ang。今á日ê故事聽了若感覺有趣味，請kā阮chhi̍h讚，注文，tàu相報，lín ê每一份鼓勵，攏會成做阮閣拚--lòe ê氣力！Ló͘-la̍t！再會！
【Pe̍h-ōe-jī pán】
Kok-ūi sòaⁿ-téng ê thiaⁿ-chiòng pêng-iú, ta̍k-ê pêng-an, ta̍k-ê hó, hoan-gêng siu-thiaⁿ Chò-kang-á-lâng phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h, góa sī chú-chhî-jîn Bí-leng! Kóng chhù-bī ê Tâi-gí, chò chhù-bī ê tāi-chì, “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘” chit ê chiat-bo̍k sī iû lán Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok, kin-á-ji̍t beh kóng--ê, sī lán “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú” tē 2 chi̍p, ông-hiō teh kā kong-chú siōng-khò. Eh! Lāu-su teh kóng-ōe, ta̍k-ke ài jīn-chin thiaⁿ heh!
Thâu 1 kang kā kong-chú siōng-khò, che ông-hiō ké--chhut-lâi ê khì-chit, to̍h ián bē lo̍h--khì, i siūⁿ kóng: “Chit-má ê gín-á sī án-chóaⁿ haⁿh? Nah ē chiah pháiⁿ kà! Goán sè-hàn ê sî-chūn nah ū án-ne!” Tē 2 kang, lesson two, kà keng-chè. Ông-hiō siūⁿ tio̍h kóng: “Góa chò chà-phiàn kâng pián chîⁿ, chîⁿ ùi pa̍t-lâng ê khò͘-tē-á cháu ùi góa chia lâi, che to̍h sī 1 chióng keng-chè ê liû-thong--ā! Góa thàn tio̍h chîⁿ, sa khì o͘-pe̍h khai, bé góa kah-ì ê phôe-pau-á, che tio̍h sī chhī-tiûⁿ ê su-kiû, chhiúⁿ-siong to̍h ē chhut koh khah chē, koh khah hó khòaⁿ ê phôe-pau-á lâi bē--góa, che to̍h sī kiong-kip. Ū su-kiû, ū kiong-kip, chit ê phôe-pau-á ê chhī-tiûⁿ m̄-chiah hoat-tián ē khí--lâi.” Nā sī kóng tio̍h kah chîⁿ ū koan-hē ê tāi-chì, che ông-hiō to̍h chin-chiàⁿ ū i ê choan-gia̍p, m̄-koh i koh bē-tàng kā i koái-chîⁿ ê keng-giām the̍h chhut-lâi chhàu-phùi, i to̍h siūⁿ kóng ài iōng kán-tan ê hong-sek, lâi kà Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú. Ông-hiō chún-pī 1 ê 50 kho͘ ê tâng-sián, hâm 1 nâ phōng-kó, i kā tâng-sián khǹg tī Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú bīn thâu chêng, koh oa̍t thâu khì the̍h 1 lia̍p phōng-kó, tú beh kā phōng-kó khǹg tī toh téng ê sî, soah khòaⁿ tio̍h kong-chú kā tú-chiah hit ê 50 kho͘, tē ji̍p khì i ê lak-tē-á lāi-té, liân 1 siaⁿ to-siā to bô kóng. Ông-hiō hoah: “Eh! He sī kàu-châi neh, the̍h--chhut-lâi!”
Siūⁿ bē kàu kong-chú soah tùi i hàiⁿ thâu, chhiò-chhiò-á ìn kóng: “Bú-hiō, lí ê khì-chit--leh? khì-chit, lâi, tòe góa kóng 1 piàn, khì-chit.”
Ông-hiō sī khì kah phi̍h-phi̍h-chhoah, m̄-koh i sī choan-gia̍p ê pián-sian-á, i ngē ka jím--lo̍h-lâi, chhiú chhun ji̍p-khì lak-tē-á lāi-té, koh the̍h lēng-gōa 1 ê 10 kho͘ ê gîn-kak-á chhut--lâi, oa̍t thâu soah khòaⁿ tio̍h kong-chú chhiú chhun tn̂g tn̂g, chún-pī beh kā gîn-kak-á chiap--kòe-lâi, koh khah hàm--ê sī, tú-chiah khǹg toh-téng hit lia̍p phōng-kó, í-keng ho͘ sa khì khè kah chhun 1 pòaⁿ--ah! Ông-hiō khì kah kiōng-beh tn̄g-náu-kin, tōa-siaⁿ lé: “lí chit ê put-siū-kà ê iau-kúi sí-gín-á!”
Siūⁿ bē kàu Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ba̍k-chiu thí kah chiok tōa lúi, chhiú kí i ê phīⁿ-á kóng: “Lí…Lí kèng-jiân kā góa mē, lí kám m̄ chai-iáⁿ goán lāu-pē sī siáng? Ŏ͘-ò͘, góa to̍h chai, lí ê khì-chit sī ké--chhut-lâi-ê, Góa…Góa beh khì kā goán a-pah kóng!”
Kóng soah, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú to̍h ùi kàu-sek chông--chhut-khì, tùi ông-hiō sin-khu piⁿ cháu--kòe ê sî, koh sūn-chhiú kā hit nâ phōng-kó sa--khì, chit siaⁿ, ông-hiō ê chà-phiàn chu-kim hâm chong-pī lóng khì hông koái liáu liáu, kiong-kip, su-kiû, hâm chhī-tiûⁿ, kui ê chóng hāi--khì. I khì kah kiông beh thò͘-hoeh, m̄-koh i chin kín to̍h léng-chēng--lo̍h-lâi, siūⁿ kóng: “Góa to̍h iáu-bē ùi kok-ông hia phiàn tio̍h chîⁿ, chit-má koh ke liáu 50 kho͘, bē ēng--chit, tāi-chì choa̍t-tùi bē-tàng tī chit-sî piak-khang!” Ông-hiō kûn kha láng--khí-lâi, kóaⁿ-kín cháu khì chhōe kok-ông, i chhiong kah chok chheⁿ-kông, cháu kah bē-hù ké siok-lú, it-ti̍t kàu cháu ji̍p khì kok-ông ê pān-kong-sek, khòaⁿ tio̍h kok-ông chin bô-êng, khû tī piⁿ--á teh phah tiān-tōng, ông-hiō chiah kóaⁿ-kín sin-khu khiā ho͘ ti̍t, kek kah chin tōa-pān chin iu-ngá. Kok-ông thiaⁿ tio̍h siaⁿ, thâu giâ--khí-lâi, mn̄g i kóng: “Honey, siáⁿ tāi-chì?” “Ĕ? Ah Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú--leh? I nah ē bô tī chia?”
Tang-sî-á lán Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú, ùi kàu-sek chông--chhut-khì liáu-āu, to̍h bē kì tit beh chhòng-siáⁿ, i siūⁿ to bô siūⁿ, ti̍t-chiap ùi tû-pâng chông--khì, the̍h hit nâ phōng-kó, kah lâng ōaⁿ 2 ki ke-thúi, si̍t-hiān siōng goân-sú ê kau-e̍k, jîn-lūi ê keng-chè to̍h sī án-ne hoat-tián--khí-lâi-ê, jî-chhiáⁿ i ê ho̍k-bū koh chiok hó, “He nâ-á góa sa-bì-suh--ê, bián sè-jī.” Kóng soah, 1 ki ke-thúi the̍h tī chhiú-thâu, lēng-gōa 1 ki ti̍t-chiap that tī chhùi--ni̍h, oat--leh to̍h koh chhut-khì. Beh lî-khui ê sî, tû-pâng ê mn̂g koh sūn-sòa tùi gōa-kháu ka só--khí-lâi.
Kóng tńg-lâi ông-hiō chit pêng, sui-bóng Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú bô lâi chia tâu i ké-pai, m̄-koh i kám-kak tio̍h seng kā kok-ông chù 1-ē-á ī-hông-siā. Ông-hiō kā kok-ông kóng: “Lán chit ê cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ hoⁿh, chin chiàⁿ sī sè-hàn pháiⁿ io-chhī, tōa-hàn pháiⁿ kà-sī--lah, i chiok ài kóng pe̍h-chha̍t, i nā-sī kā lí kóng siaⁿh, lí chhian-bān to̍h m̄-thang sìn.”
Kok-ông ná phah tiān-tōng ná ìn kóng: “Taⁿ lí sī teh kóng siaⁿh? I sè-hàn sî a̍h m̄ sī lí io-chhī--ê.” Ông-hiō koh siūⁿ beh kóng-ōe, kok-ông soah sòa-lŏe kóng: “Sui-bóng i ū tām-po̍h-á khah phî, m̄-koh ta̍k-ke lóng chiok ài--i. Ài kah siáⁿ-mih thêng-tō͘--o͘h? Chhin-chhiūⁿ lán ông-kiong kū-nî ê bóe-gê, thâu-siúⁿ sī siaⁿh hō͘ lí ioh, sī kong-chú ê chhiam-miâ siòng-pìⁿ! I koh chiok tah-sim, ke kah 1 kha i chhēng--kòe ê boe̍h-á, ta̍k-ke lóng siūⁿ beh thiu tio̍h hit ê chióng-phín--nē!”
“Hăⁿ? Boe̍h-á? Nah ē kan-na 1 kha?”
“Ah to̍h i boe̍h-á thǹg--lo̍h-lâi to̍h o͘-pe̍h tàn, 1 kha phàng-kiàn, chhun--ê hit kha to̍h sa lâi chò chióng-phín--ā.”
“Án-ne mā ē-sái o͘h?”
“Góa kā lí kóng, chhun 1 kha sǹg bē-bái--ah, ū sî hoⁿh, i kui siang lóng ē-sái phah bô--khì-o͘h!”
Ông-hiō siūⁿ kóng: “Lí chhōa góa lâi chò bó͘, kan-na kā góa kóng lí ū 1 ê súi cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ, mā bô kā góa kóng lín cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ sī 1 ê si̍p-koàn hiah-nī bái ê kâu-sí-gín-á, kám kóng…Góa khì tú-tio̍h chà-phiàn?”
Kok-ông koh kóng: “Iû-kî sī i ê fans hoⁿh. tùi i chin hó, hō͘ i chiâⁿ chē tō͘-né o͘h, lí khòaⁿ i pêng-siông sî sì-kè teh bé sì-siù-á, lóng sī chia̍h i ka-tī thàn--ê neh. Chhun ê chîⁿ, góa to̍h ka tòng-chò sī âng-pau, ka siu siu--khài, thè i pó-koán. It-ti̍t kàu kū-nî, lán chit ê kok-ka, ū pah hun chi jī-cha̍p ê ī-sǹg, sī khai Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ê tō͘-né--lah!”
Ông-hiō kiaⁿ 1 tiô, siūⁿ kóng: “Ăⁿ? M̄ sī kóng thè i pó-koán? Ná-ē chŏaⁿ ka tha̍h khì chò ī-sǹg? Hāi--ā hāi--ā hāi--ā, chit kho͘ chiah-nī bô liông-sim, góa chin-chiàⁿ khì tú-tio̍h chà-phiàn--ah!”
Ông-hiō siūⁿ siūⁿ--leh, koh mn̄g kóng: “I bú he siáⁿ-mih bê-chiòng-ia̍h, chò he siáⁿ-mih bāng-chhèng, he kám chin-chiàⁿ chiok hó thàn?”
“He tàu-té sī siaⁿh, góa mā m̄ chai, m̄-koh i chin-chiàⁿ thàn bē chió--lah.”
Ōe kóng liáu, kok-ông to̍h kè-sio̍k tī hia bô-êng phah tiān-tōng, sim-sîn lóng ho͘ kau kau--khì, kan-na chù-ì teh khòaⁿ tiān-sī ōe-bīn lāi-té hit sian ang-á, tī hia thiàu--1-ē thiàu--1-ē, tin-tong, ŏ͘-ò͘, 1 pah hun!
Khòaⁿ kok-ông bô koh kóng-ōe, ông-hiō mā thâu oat--leh kiâⁿ--chhut-khì, i it-ti̍t teh siūⁿ thâu tú-á thiaⁿ--tio̍h-ê, kóng he kong-chú thàn chin chē, ông-hiō to̍h siūⁿ kóng: “Hò͘ⁿ, i kui-kang kò͘ teh chia̍h, bô-tāi-bô-chì to̍h tī hia hip siáⁿ-mih chiú-mi ê siòng-phìⁿ, án-ne to̍h ē sái thàn-chîⁿ o͘h? Che chin-chiàⁿ bô thian-lí! Put-jû, góa ka-tī mā lâi chò bāng-chhèng.”
Ông-hiō to̍h ka-tī khì sin-chhéng 1 ê bê-chiòng-ia̍h, hō chò “Choân sè-kài siōng súi ê ông-hiō”, i pún-té to̍h chin gâu chng, koh o̍h siàu-liân gín-á cosplay, ta̍k kang chhēng bô kāng su saⁿ, tī hia ké i chiok ū khì-chit, he siòng-phìⁿ hip liáu, seng iōng PS kā i chhú-lí--kòe, PS liáu-āu, chiah koh PS, to̍h án-ne bú kui kó͘-goe̍h, i ê fans hoⁿh, chóng-sǹg sī cheng-ka kàu 87 ê! Ông-hiō chiok hoaⁿ-hí, i nā-sī beh piàⁿ kòe Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú, kan-na chha…180 bān ê fans niâ. Sòa--lòe i liân khì Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ê bāng-ia̍h khòaⁿ, khòaⁿ tio̍h kong-chú chăng thoân 1 tiuⁿ siòng-phìⁿ, siòng-pìⁿ lāi-bīn, i chhùi--ni̍h kā 1 ki hang ian-chhiâng, chiàⁿ-chhiú koh pí 1 ê chiú-mi, nā m̄-sī tò-chhiú beh the̍h chhiú-ki-á hip-siōng, hoān-sè i ē tī hia ó͘ phīⁿ-khang! To̍h hit tiuⁿ siòng-pìⁿ hoⁿh, ùi chăng kàu chit-má, í-keng hông chhi̍h kah 50 bān ê chán--ah neh! Ông-hiō khì kah beh sí, khì~kah beh sí, lín chó͘-má kám ē su hō͘ lí chit ê sí-gín-á?
Ông-hiō ê oàn-tò͘ tùi Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú oân-choân bô éng-hióng, i lâng iû-oân sī kui châng hó hó. It-ti̍t kàu ū 1 kang, ông-hiō hō͘ lâng só tī ka-tī ê pâng-keng lāi, khì kah beh hāi--khì, chū án-ne sim-koaⁿ lia̍h thán-hoâiⁿ, koat-tēng beh kā kong-chú chhòng ho͘ sí. I to̍h khai-sí àm-tiong an-pâi 1 kóa tāi-chì, piān-nā ū ki-hōe, to̍h tī kok-ông hīⁿ-khang piⁿ kóng 1 kóa êng-á-ōe.
Chū án-ne, chóng-sǹg sī tán kàu hit 1 ji̍t, kok-ông kā Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú kiò--kòe-khì, kóng: “Lí hoⁿh, tōa-lâng-tōa-chéng--ah, mài kui-kang kan-na ē-hiáu tī hia póe chhiú-ki-á, bú siáⁿ-mih bê-chiòng-ia̍h, lí tio̍h ài ná o̍h khòaⁿ án-chóaⁿ chhú-lí kong-sū, thè jîn-bîn ho̍k-bū.”
kong-chú thiaⁿ liáu ū tām-po̍h-á siūⁿ-khì, góa keng-êng bê-chiòng-ia̍h sī koh án-chóaⁿ--ah, lí ka-tī m̄ sī mā kui-kang tī hia teh phah tiān-tōng!
Chit sî ông-hiō thiàu chhut-lâi kóng: “Góa thiaⁿ kóng chhiū-nâ-á lāi-té ū lâng chiàm-iōng kok-iú-tē, tī hia khí pia̍t-chong, bô lí phài lán chit ê pó-pòe-á kong-chú khì tiâu-cha khòaⁿ māi, hō͘ i hoⁿh, ū 1 kóa chèng-keng tāi-chì thang chò.”
Kong-chú bô siūⁿ beh chò tāi-chì, m̄-koh ông-hiō teh i hīⁿ-khang piⁿ, ka kóng sè-siaⁿ-ōe: “Koai, góa kiò lâng chhōa lí khì chia̍h hó-liāu--ê.”
Thiaⁿ tio̍h chia̍h hó-liāu, kong-chú sûi ìn hó, ông-hiō koh kóng: “Lí bián hoân-ló, góa phài 1 ê sat-chhiú…m̄-sī, sī hō͘-ōe hâm lí khì.”
Ông-hiō chhiú ia̍t--1-ē, to̍h khòaⁿ tio̍h 1 ê bīn ū 1 khî ê cha-po͘-lâng kiâⁿ--ji̍p-lâi, kong-chú khòaⁿ chit ê chheⁿ-hūn lâng, kóng: “Ĕ? Chit ê lâng góa nah ē m̄-bat khòaⁿ--kòe?”
“I gōa-pau--ê-lah”
To̍h án-ne, kong-chú hâm chit ê chheⁿ-hūn lâng, chah 2 lia̍p piān-tong, kiâⁿ chhut siâⁿ-mn̂g, ùi chhiū-nâ-á kiâⁿ--ji̍p-khì.
Hó͘--ò͘! Nâ-á lāi ê chhiū-á hoat kah ū kàu ōm, kā kong-chú in 2 lâng cha̍h-tiâu--leh, khòaⁿ bô iáⁿ, thiaⁿ bô siaⁿ, hāi góa soah m̄-chai beh kóng siáⁿ, ah bô lán kin-á-ji̍t ê chiat-bo̍k to̍h seng kóng kàu chia, kám-siā ta̍k-ke siu-thiaⁿ lán “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘”, “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú”!
Chit ê kò͘-sū, sī iû lán Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok, Phian-kio̍k: Chiá-siông, Ián-chhut: Bí-leng, Im-ga̍k/Iáⁿ-phìⁿ: Niau-tāu, Jī-bō͘/Kàu-tùi: A-chin in ang. Kin-á-ji̍t ê kò͘-sū thiaⁿ liáu nā kám-kak ū chhù-bī, chhiáⁿ kā gún chhi̍h chán, chù-bûn, tàu sio-pò, lín ê múi chi̍t hūn kó͘-lē, lóng ē chiâⁿ chò gún koh piàⁿ--lòe ê khùi-la̍t! Ló͘-la̍t! Chài-hōe!
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By Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek 做工á人工作室
講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】是做工á人工作室製作ê全新單元，歡迎收聽【白蔥á公主】，真ló͘-la̍t，真感謝。
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以下內容是漢羅kah pe̍h-ōe-jī原稿，有需要歡迎ta̍k-ke來參考。
【漢羅版】
各位線頂ê聽眾朋友，ta̍k-ê平安, ta̍k-ê好, 歡迎收聽做工á人phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h，我是主持人Bí-leng！講趣味ê台語，做趣味ê代誌，【狡怪囡仔古】chit ê節目是由咱做工á人工作室製作，今á日beh講--ê，是咱「白蔥á公主」第2集，王后teh kā公主上課。Eh！老師teh講話，ta̍k-ke ài認真聽heh！
頭1工kā公主上課，che王后假--出-來ê氣質，to̍h演bē落--去，伊想講：「Chit-má ê gín-á是án怎haⁿh？Nah ē chiah歹教！Goán細漢ê時陣nah有án-ne！」
第2工，lesson two，教經濟。王后想tio̍h講：「我做詐騙kâng諞錢，錢ùi別人ê褲袋á走ùi我chia來，che to̍h是1種經濟ê流通--ā！我趁tio̍h錢，捎去烏白開，買我kah意ê皮包á，這tio̍h是市場ê需求，廠商to̍h會出閣較濟、閣較好看ê皮包á來賣--我，che to̍h是供給。有需求，有供給，chit ê皮包á ê市場m̄-chiah發展會起--來。」Nā是講tio̍h kah錢有關係ê代誌，che王后to̍h真正有伊ê專業，m̄-koh伊閣bē-tàng kā伊拐錢ê經驗the̍h出來臭屁，伊to̍h想講ài用簡單ê方式，來教白蔥á公主。王后準備1 ê 50 kho͘ ê銅sián，hâm 1籃蘋果，伊kā銅sián khǹg tī白蔥á公主面頭前，閣oa̍t頭去the̍h 1粒蘋果，tú beh kā蘋果khǹg tī桌頂ê時，soah看tio̍h公主kā tú-chiah hit ê 50 kho͘，tē入去伊ê lak袋á內底，連1聲多謝都無講。
王后hoah：「Eh！He是教材neh，the̍h--出-來！」
想bē到公主soah對伊hàiⁿ頭，笑笑á應講：「母后，你ê氣質--leh？氣質，來，tòe我講1遍，氣質。」
王后是氣kah phi̍h-phi̍h-chhoah，m̄-koh伊是專業ê諞仙á，伊硬ka忍--落-來，手伸入去lak袋á內底，閣the̍h另外1 ê 10 kho͘ ê銀角á出--來，oa̍t頭soah看tio̍h公主手伸長長，準備beh kā銀角á接--過-來，koh較hàm--ê是，tú-chiah khǹg桌頂hit粒蘋果，已經ho͘捎去khè kah chhun 1半--ah！王后氣kah kiōng-beh斷腦筋，大聲詈：「你chit ê不受教ê iau鬼死gín-á！」
想bē到白蔥á公主目睭thí kah足大蕊，手指伊ê鼻á講：「你…你竟然kā我罵，你kám m̄知影goán老爸是siáng？Ŏ͘-ò͘，我to̍h知，你ê氣質是假--出-來-ê，我…我beh去kā goán阿爸講！」
講soah，白蔥á公主to̍h ùi教室chông--出-去，tùi王后身軀邊走--過ê時，koh順手kā hit籃蘋果捎--去，chit聲，王后ê詐騙資金hâm裝備攏去hông拐了了，供給、需求，hâm市場，規ê總害--去。伊氣kah強beh吐血，m̄-koh伊真緊to̍h冷靜--落-siàⁿ來，想講：「我to̍h猶未ùi國王hia騙tio̍h錢，chit-má koh加了50 kho͘，bē用--chit，代誌絕對bē-tàng tī這時piak-khang！」王后裙腳láng--起-來，趕緊走去chhōe國王，伊衝kah chok青狂，走kah bē-hù假淑女，一直到走入去國王ê辦公室，看tio̍h國王真無閒，khû tī邊á teh phah電動，王后chiah趕緊身軀khiā ho͘直，激kah真大範真優雅。國王聽tio̍h聲，頭giâ--起-來，問伊講：「Honey，啥代誌？」「Ĕ？Ah白蔥á公主--leh？伊nah會無tī chia？」
當時á咱白蔥á公主，ùi教室chông--出-去了後，to̍h bē記tit beh創啥，伊想都無想，直接ùi廚房chông--去，the̍h hit籃蘋果，kah人換2 ki雞腿，實現上原始ê交易，人類ê經濟to̍h是án-ne發展--起-來-ê，而且伊ê服務koh足好，「He籃á我sa-bì-suh--ê，免細膩。」講soah，1 ki雞腿the̍h tī手頭，另外1 ki直接that tī嘴--ni̍h，oa̍t--leh to̍h閣出--去。Beh離開ê時，廚房ê門koh順sòa tùi外口ka鎖--起-來。
講轉來王后chit pêng，雖罔白蔥á公主無來chia tâu伊假pai，m̄-koh伊感覺tio̍h先kā國王注1-ē-á預防siā。王后kā國王講：「咱chit ê查某囝hoⁿh，真正是細漢歹育飼，大漢歹教示--lah，伊足愛講白賊，伊若是kā你講啥，你千萬to̍h m̄通信。」
國王ná phah電動ná應講：「Taⁿ你是teh講啥？伊細漢時a̍h m̄是你育飼--ê。」
王后koh想beh講話，國王soah sòa-lŏe講：「雖罔伊有淡薄á較皮，m̄-koh逐家攏足愛--伊。愛kah啥物程度--o͘h？親像咱王宮舊年ê尾牙，頭賞是啥hō͘妳ioh，是公主ê簽名相片！伊koh足搭心，加kah 1腳伊穿--過ê襪á，逐家攏想beh抽tio̍h hit ê獎品--nē！」
「Hăⁿ？襪á？哪會kan-na 1腳？」
「Ah to̍h伊襪á thǹg--落-來to̍h烏白擲，1腳phàng見，chhun--ê hit腳to̍h捎來做獎品--ā。」
「Án-ne mā會使o͘h？」
「我kā你講，chhun 1腳算bē-bái--ah，有時hoⁿh，伊規雙攏會使phah無--去-o͘h！」
王后想講：「你chhōa我來做某，kan-na kā我講你有1 ê水查某囝，mā無kā我講lín查某囝是1 ê習慣hiah-nī bái ê猴死gín-á，kám講…我去tú-tio̍h詐騙？」
國王koh講：「尤其是伊ê fans hoⁿh，對伊真好，hō͘伊chiâⁿ濟tō͘-né o͘h，你看伊平常時四界teh買sì-siù-á，攏是食伊家己趁--ê neh。Chhun ê錢，我to̍h ka當做是紅包，ka收收--khài，替伊保管。一直到舊年，咱chit ê國家，有百分之二十ê預算，是開白蔥á公主ê tō͘-né--lah！」
王后驚1 tiô，想講：「Ăⁿ？M̄是講替伊保管？Ná-ē chŏaⁿ ka the̍h去做預算？害--ā害--ā害--ā，chit kho͘ chiah-nī無良心，我真正去tú-tio̍h詐騙--ah！」
王后想想--leh，koh問講：「伊舞he啥物迷眾頁，做he啥物網chhèng，he kám真正足好趁？」
「He到底是啥，我mā m̄知，m̄-koh伊真正趁bē少--lah。」話講了，國王to̍h繼續tī hia無閒phah電動，心神攏ho͘鉤鉤--去，kan-na注意teh看電視畫面內底hit仙ang-á，tī hia跳--1-ē 跳--1-ē，tin-tong，ŏ͘-ò͘，1百分！
看國王無koh講話，王后mā頭oat--leh行--出-去，伊一直teh想頭tú-á聽--tio̍h-ê，講he公主趁真濟，王后to̍h想講：「Hò͘ⁿ，伊規工顧teh食，無代無誌to̍h tī hia hip啥物chiú-mi ê相片，án-ne to̍h會使趁錢o͘h？Che真正無天理！不如，我家己mā來做網chhèng。」
王后to̍h家己去申請1 ê迷眾頁，hō做「全世界上水ê王后」，伊本底to̍h真gâu妝，koh學少年gín-á cosplay，ta̍k工穿無kāng軀衫，tī hia假伊足有氣質，he相片hip了，先用PS kā伊處理--過，PS了後，chiah koh PS，to̍h án-ne舞規個月，伊ê fans hoⁿh，總算是增加到87 ê！王后足歡喜，伊若是beh piàⁿ過白蔥á公主，kan-na差…180萬ê fans niâ。Sòa--lòe伊連去白蔥á公主ê網頁看，看tio̍h公主chăng傳1張相片，相片內面，伊嘴--ni̍h咬1支烘煙腸，正手koh比1 ê chiú-mi，若m̄是tò手beh the̍h手機á hip相，凡勢伊會tī hia挖鼻孔！To̍h hit張相片hoⁿh，ùi chăng到chit-má，已經hông chhi̍h kah 50萬ê讚--ah neh！王后氣kah beh死，氣~kah beh死，lín祖媽kám會輸hō͘你chit ê死gín-á？
王后ê怨妒對白蔥á公主完全無影響，伊人猶原是規châng好好。一直到有1工，王后hō͘人鎖tī伊家己ê房間內，氣kah beh害--去，自án-ne心肝掠坦橫，決定beh kā公主創ho͘死。伊to̍h開始暗中安排1寡代誌，便nā有機會，to̍h tī國王耳孔邊講1寡閒á話。
自án-ne，總算是等到hit 1日，國王kā白蔥á公主叫--過-去，講：「你hoⁿh，大人大種--ah，mài規工kan-na會曉tī hia póe手機á，舞啥物迷眾頁，你tio̍h ài ná學看án怎處理公事，替人民服務。」
公主聽了有淡薄á受氣，我經營迷眾頁是閣án怎--ah，你家己m̄是mā規工tī hia teh phah電動！
Chit時王后跳出來講：「我聽講樹林á內底有人佔用國有地，tī hia起別莊，無你派咱chit ê寶貝á公主去調查看māi，hō͘伊hoⁿh，有1寡正經代誌通做。」
公主無想beh做代誌，m̄-koh王后teh伊耳空邊，ka講細聲話：「乖，我叫人chhōa你去食好料--ê。」
聽tio̍h食好料，公主隨應好，王后閣講：「你免煩惱，我派1 ê殺手…m̄是，是護衛hâm你去。」
王后手ia̍t--1-ē，to̍h看tio̍h 1 ê面有1蜞ê查甫人行--入-來，公主看chit ê生份人，講：「Ĕ？Chit ê人我nah ē m̄-bat看--過？」
「伊外包--ê-lah。」
To̍h án-ne，公主hâm chit ê生份人，chah 2粒便當，行出城門，ùi樹林á行--入-去。
Hó͘--ò͘！林á內ê樹á發kah有夠ōm，kā公主in 2人cha̍h-tiâu--leh，看無影，聽無聲，害我soah m̄知欲講啥，ah無咱今á日ê節目to̍h先講到chia，感謝ta̍k-ke收聽咱狡怪囡á古，白蔥á公主！
Chit ê故事，是由咱做工á人工作室製作，編劇：Chiá-siông，演出：Bí-leng，音樂／影片：Niau-tāu，字幕／校對：A-chin in ang。今á日ê故事聽了若感覺有趣味，請kā阮chhi̍h讚，注文，tàu相報，lín ê每一份鼓勵，攏會成做阮閣拚--lòe ê氣力！Ló͘-la̍t！再會！
【Pe̍h-ōe-jī pán】
Kok-ūi sòaⁿ-téng ê thiaⁿ-chiòng pêng-iú, ta̍k-ê pêng-an, ta̍k-ê hó, hoan-gêng siu-thiaⁿ Chò-kang-á-lâng phá-kheh-su̍h-to͘h, góa sī chú-chhî-jîn Bí-leng! Kóng chhù-bī ê Tâi-gí, chò chhù-bī ê tāi-chì, “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘” chit ê chiat-bo̍k sī iû lán Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok, kin-á-ji̍t beh kóng--ê, sī lán “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú” tē 2 chi̍p, ông-hiō teh kā kong-chú siōng-khò. Eh! Lāu-su teh kóng-ōe, ta̍k-ke ài jīn-chin thiaⁿ heh!
Thâu 1 kang kā kong-chú siōng-khò, che ông-hiō ké--chhut-lâi ê khì-chit, to̍h ián bē lo̍h--khì, i siūⁿ kóng: “Chit-má ê gín-á sī án-chóaⁿ haⁿh? Nah ē chiah pháiⁿ kà! Goán sè-hàn ê sî-chūn nah ū án-ne!” Tē 2 kang, lesson two, kà keng-chè. Ông-hiō siūⁿ tio̍h kóng: “Góa chò chà-phiàn kâng pián chîⁿ, chîⁿ ùi pa̍t-lâng ê khò͘-tē-á cháu ùi góa chia lâi, che to̍h sī 1 chióng keng-chè ê liû-thong--ā! Góa thàn tio̍h chîⁿ, sa khì o͘-pe̍h khai, bé góa kah-ì ê phôe-pau-á, che tio̍h sī chhī-tiûⁿ ê su-kiû, chhiúⁿ-siong to̍h ē chhut koh khah chē, koh khah hó khòaⁿ ê phôe-pau-á lâi bē--góa, che to̍h sī kiong-kip. Ū su-kiû, ū kiong-kip, chit ê phôe-pau-á ê chhī-tiûⁿ m̄-chiah hoat-tián ē khí--lâi.” Nā sī kóng tio̍h kah chîⁿ ū koan-hē ê tāi-chì, che ông-hiō to̍h chin-chiàⁿ ū i ê choan-gia̍p, m̄-koh i koh bē-tàng kā i koái-chîⁿ ê keng-giām the̍h chhut-lâi chhàu-phùi, i to̍h siūⁿ kóng ài iōng kán-tan ê hong-sek, lâi kà Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú. Ông-hiō chún-pī 1 ê 50 kho͘ ê tâng-sián, hâm 1 nâ phōng-kó, i kā tâng-sián khǹg tī Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú bīn thâu chêng, koh oa̍t thâu khì the̍h 1 lia̍p phōng-kó, tú beh kā phōng-kó khǹg tī toh téng ê sî, soah khòaⁿ tio̍h kong-chú kā tú-chiah hit ê 50 kho͘, tē ji̍p khì i ê lak-tē-á lāi-té, liân 1 siaⁿ to-siā to bô kóng. Ông-hiō hoah: “Eh! He sī kàu-châi neh, the̍h--chhut-lâi!”
Siūⁿ bē kàu kong-chú soah tùi i hàiⁿ thâu, chhiò-chhiò-á ìn kóng: “Bú-hiō, lí ê khì-chit--leh? khì-chit, lâi, tòe góa kóng 1 piàn, khì-chit.”
Ông-hiō sī khì kah phi̍h-phi̍h-chhoah, m̄-koh i sī choan-gia̍p ê pián-sian-á, i ngē ka jím--lo̍h-lâi, chhiú chhun ji̍p-khì lak-tē-á lāi-té, koh the̍h lēng-gōa 1 ê 10 kho͘ ê gîn-kak-á chhut--lâi, oa̍t thâu soah khòaⁿ tio̍h kong-chú chhiú chhun tn̂g tn̂g, chún-pī beh kā gîn-kak-á chiap--kòe-lâi, koh khah hàm--ê sī, tú-chiah khǹg toh-téng hit lia̍p phōng-kó, í-keng ho͘ sa khì khè kah chhun 1 pòaⁿ--ah! Ông-hiō khì kah kiōng-beh tn̄g-náu-kin, tōa-siaⁿ lé: “lí chit ê put-siū-kà ê iau-kúi sí-gín-á!”
Siūⁿ bē kàu Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ba̍k-chiu thí kah chiok tōa lúi, chhiú kí i ê phīⁿ-á kóng: “Lí…Lí kèng-jiân kā góa mē, lí kám m̄ chai-iáⁿ goán lāu-pē sī siáng? Ŏ͘-ò͘, góa to̍h chai, lí ê khì-chit sī ké--chhut-lâi-ê, Góa…Góa beh khì kā goán a-pah kóng!”
Kóng soah, Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú to̍h ùi kàu-sek chông--chhut-khì, tùi ông-hiō sin-khu piⁿ cháu--kòe ê sî, koh sūn-chhiú kā hit nâ phōng-kó sa--khì, chit siaⁿ, ông-hiō ê chà-phiàn chu-kim hâm chong-pī lóng khì hông koái liáu liáu, kiong-kip, su-kiû, hâm chhī-tiûⁿ, kui ê chóng hāi--khì. I khì kah kiông beh thò͘-hoeh, m̄-koh i chin kín to̍h léng-chēng--lo̍h-lâi, siūⁿ kóng: “Góa to̍h iáu-bē ùi kok-ông hia phiàn tio̍h chîⁿ, chit-má koh ke liáu 50 kho͘, bē ēng--chit, tāi-chì choa̍t-tùi bē-tàng tī chit-sî piak-khang!” Ông-hiō kûn kha láng--khí-lâi, kóaⁿ-kín cháu khì chhōe kok-ông, i chhiong kah chok chheⁿ-kông, cháu kah bē-hù ké siok-lú, it-ti̍t kàu cháu ji̍p khì kok-ông ê pān-kong-sek, khòaⁿ tio̍h kok-ông chin bô-êng, khû tī piⁿ--á teh phah tiān-tōng, ông-hiō chiah kóaⁿ-kín sin-khu khiā ho͘ ti̍t, kek kah chin tōa-pān chin iu-ngá. Kok-ông thiaⁿ tio̍h siaⁿ, thâu giâ--khí-lâi, mn̄g i kóng: “Honey, siáⁿ tāi-chì?” “Ĕ? Ah Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú--leh? I nah ē bô tī chia?”
Tang-sî-á lán Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú, ùi kàu-sek chông--chhut-khì liáu-āu, to̍h bē kì tit beh chhòng-siáⁿ, i siūⁿ to bô siūⁿ, ti̍t-chiap ùi tû-pâng chông--khì, the̍h hit nâ phōng-kó, kah lâng ōaⁿ 2 ki ke-thúi, si̍t-hiān siōng goân-sú ê kau-e̍k, jîn-lūi ê keng-chè to̍h sī án-ne hoat-tián--khí-lâi-ê, jî-chhiáⁿ i ê ho̍k-bū koh chiok hó, “He nâ-á góa sa-bì-suh--ê, bián sè-jī.” Kóng soah, 1 ki ke-thúi the̍h tī chhiú-thâu, lēng-gōa 1 ki ti̍t-chiap that tī chhùi--ni̍h, oat--leh to̍h koh chhut-khì. Beh lî-khui ê sî, tû-pâng ê mn̂g koh sūn-sòa tùi gōa-kháu ka só--khí-lâi.
Kóng tńg-lâi ông-hiō chit pêng, sui-bóng Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú bô lâi chia tâu i ké-pai, m̄-koh i kám-kak tio̍h seng kā kok-ông chù 1-ē-á ī-hông-siā. Ông-hiō kā kok-ông kóng: “Lán chit ê cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ hoⁿh, chin chiàⁿ sī sè-hàn pháiⁿ io-chhī, tōa-hàn pháiⁿ kà-sī--lah, i chiok ài kóng pe̍h-chha̍t, i nā-sī kā lí kóng siaⁿh, lí chhian-bān to̍h m̄-thang sìn.”
Kok-ông ná phah tiān-tōng ná ìn kóng: “Taⁿ lí sī teh kóng siaⁿh? I sè-hàn sî a̍h m̄ sī lí io-chhī--ê.” Ông-hiō koh siūⁿ beh kóng-ōe, kok-ông soah sòa-lŏe kóng: “Sui-bóng i ū tām-po̍h-á khah phî, m̄-koh ta̍k-ke lóng chiok ài--i. Ài kah siáⁿ-mih thêng-tō͘--o͘h? Chhin-chhiūⁿ lán ông-kiong kū-nî ê bóe-gê, thâu-siúⁿ sī siaⁿh hō͘ lí ioh, sī kong-chú ê chhiam-miâ siòng-pìⁿ! I koh chiok tah-sim, ke kah 1 kha i chhēng--kòe ê boe̍h-á, ta̍k-ke lóng siūⁿ beh thiu tio̍h hit ê chióng-phín--nē!”
“Hăⁿ? Boe̍h-á? Nah ē kan-na 1 kha?”
“Ah to̍h i boe̍h-á thǹg--lo̍h-lâi to̍h o͘-pe̍h tàn, 1 kha phàng-kiàn, chhun--ê hit kha to̍h sa lâi chò chióng-phín--ā.”
“Án-ne mā ē-sái o͘h?”
“Góa kā lí kóng, chhun 1 kha sǹg bē-bái--ah, ū sî hoⁿh, i kui siang lóng ē-sái phah bô--khì-o͘h!”
Ông-hiō siūⁿ kóng: “Lí chhōa góa lâi chò bó͘, kan-na kā góa kóng lí ū 1 ê súi cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ, mā bô kā góa kóng lín cha-bó͘-kiáⁿ sī 1 ê si̍p-koàn hiah-nī bái ê kâu-sí-gín-á, kám kóng…Góa khì tú-tio̍h chà-phiàn?”
Kok-ông koh kóng: “Iû-kî sī i ê fans hoⁿh. tùi i chin hó, hō͘ i chiâⁿ chē tō͘-né o͘h, lí khòaⁿ i pêng-siông sî sì-kè teh bé sì-siù-á, lóng sī chia̍h i ka-tī thàn--ê neh. Chhun ê chîⁿ, góa to̍h ka tòng-chò sī âng-pau, ka siu siu--khài, thè i pó-koán. It-ti̍t kàu kū-nî, lán chit ê kok-ka, ū pah hun chi jī-cha̍p ê ī-sǹg, sī khai Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ê tō͘-né--lah!”
Ông-hiō kiaⁿ 1 tiô, siūⁿ kóng: “Ăⁿ? M̄ sī kóng thè i pó-koán? Ná-ē chŏaⁿ ka tha̍h khì chò ī-sǹg? Hāi--ā hāi--ā hāi--ā, chit kho͘ chiah-nī bô liông-sim, góa chin-chiàⁿ khì tú-tio̍h chà-phiàn--ah!”
Ông-hiō siūⁿ siūⁿ--leh, koh mn̄g kóng: “I bú he siáⁿ-mih bê-chiòng-ia̍h, chò he siáⁿ-mih bāng-chhèng, he kám chin-chiàⁿ chiok hó thàn?”
“He tàu-té sī siaⁿh, góa mā m̄ chai, m̄-koh i chin-chiàⁿ thàn bē chió--lah.”
Ōe kóng liáu, kok-ông to̍h kè-sio̍k tī hia bô-êng phah tiān-tōng, sim-sîn lóng ho͘ kau kau--khì, kan-na chù-ì teh khòaⁿ tiān-sī ōe-bīn lāi-té hit sian ang-á, tī hia thiàu--1-ē thiàu--1-ē, tin-tong, ŏ͘-ò͘, 1 pah hun!
Khòaⁿ kok-ông bô koh kóng-ōe, ông-hiō mā thâu oat--leh kiâⁿ--chhut-khì, i it-ti̍t teh siūⁿ thâu tú-á thiaⁿ--tio̍h-ê, kóng he kong-chú thàn chin chē, ông-hiō to̍h siūⁿ kóng: “Hò͘ⁿ, i kui-kang kò͘ teh chia̍h, bô-tāi-bô-chì to̍h tī hia hip siáⁿ-mih chiú-mi ê siòng-phìⁿ, án-ne to̍h ē sái thàn-chîⁿ o͘h? Che chin-chiàⁿ bô thian-lí! Put-jû, góa ka-tī mā lâi chò bāng-chhèng.”
Ông-hiō to̍h ka-tī khì sin-chhéng 1 ê bê-chiòng-ia̍h, hō chò “Choân sè-kài siōng súi ê ông-hiō”, i pún-té to̍h chin gâu chng, koh o̍h siàu-liân gín-á cosplay, ta̍k kang chhēng bô kāng su saⁿ, tī hia ké i chiok ū khì-chit, he siòng-phìⁿ hip liáu, seng iōng PS kā i chhú-lí--kòe, PS liáu-āu, chiah koh PS, to̍h án-ne bú kui kó͘-goe̍h, i ê fans hoⁿh, chóng-sǹg sī cheng-ka kàu 87 ê! Ông-hiō chiok hoaⁿ-hí, i nā-sī beh piàⁿ kòe Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú, kan-na chha…180 bān ê fans niâ. Sòa--lòe i liân khì Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú ê bāng-ia̍h khòaⁿ, khòaⁿ tio̍h kong-chú chăng thoân 1 tiuⁿ siòng-phìⁿ, siòng-pìⁿ lāi-bīn, i chhùi--ni̍h kā 1 ki hang ian-chhiâng, chiàⁿ-chhiú koh pí 1 ê chiú-mi, nā m̄-sī tò-chhiú beh the̍h chhiú-ki-á hip-siōng, hoān-sè i ē tī hia ó͘ phīⁿ-khang! To̍h hit tiuⁿ siòng-pìⁿ hoⁿh, ùi chăng kàu chit-má, í-keng hông chhi̍h kah 50 bān ê chán--ah neh! Ông-hiō khì kah beh sí, khì~kah beh sí, lín chó͘-má kám ē su hō͘ lí chit ê sí-gín-á?
Ông-hiō ê oàn-tò͘ tùi Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú oân-choân bô éng-hióng, i lâng iû-oân sī kui châng hó hó. It-ti̍t kàu ū 1 kang, ông-hiō hō͘ lâng só tī ka-tī ê pâng-keng lāi, khì kah beh hāi--khì, chū án-ne sim-koaⁿ lia̍h thán-hoâiⁿ, koat-tēng beh kā kong-chú chhòng ho͘ sí. I to̍h khai-sí àm-tiong an-pâi 1 kóa tāi-chì, piān-nā ū ki-hōe, to̍h tī kok-ông hīⁿ-khang piⁿ kóng 1 kóa êng-á-ōe.
Chū án-ne, chóng-sǹg sī tán kàu hit 1 ji̍t, kok-ông kā Pe̍h-chhang-á kong-chú kiò--kòe-khì, kóng: “Lí hoⁿh, tōa-lâng-tōa-chéng--ah, mài kui-kang kan-na ē-hiáu tī hia póe chhiú-ki-á, bú siáⁿ-mih bê-chiòng-ia̍h, lí tio̍h ài ná o̍h khòaⁿ án-chóaⁿ chhú-lí kong-sū, thè jîn-bîn ho̍k-bū.”
kong-chú thiaⁿ liáu ū tām-po̍h-á siūⁿ-khì, góa keng-êng bê-chiòng-ia̍h sī koh án-chóaⁿ--ah, lí ka-tī m̄ sī mā kui-kang tī hia teh phah tiān-tōng!
Chit sî ông-hiō thiàu chhut-lâi kóng: “Góa thiaⁿ kóng chhiū-nâ-á lāi-té ū lâng chiàm-iōng kok-iú-tē, tī hia khí pia̍t-chong, bô lí phài lán chit ê pó-pòe-á kong-chú khì tiâu-cha khòaⁿ māi, hō͘ i hoⁿh, ū 1 kóa chèng-keng tāi-chì thang chò.”
Kong-chú bô siūⁿ beh chò tāi-chì, m̄-koh ông-hiō teh i hīⁿ-khang piⁿ, ka kóng sè-siaⁿ-ōe: “Koai, góa kiò lâng chhōa lí khì chia̍h hó-liāu--ê.”
Thiaⁿ tio̍h chia̍h hó-liāu, kong-chú sûi ìn hó, ông-hiō koh kóng: “Lí bián hoân-ló, góa phài 1 ê sat-chhiú…m̄-sī, sī hō͘-ōe hâm lí khì.”
Ông-hiō chhiú ia̍t--1-ē, to̍h khòaⁿ tio̍h 1 ê bīn ū 1 khî ê cha-po͘-lâng kiâⁿ--ji̍p-lâi, kong-chú khòaⁿ chit ê chheⁿ-hūn lâng, kóng: “Ĕ? Chit ê lâng góa nah ē m̄-bat khòaⁿ--kòe?”
“I gōa-pau--ê-lah”
To̍h án-ne, kong-chú hâm chit ê chheⁿ-hūn lâng, chah 2 lia̍p piān-tong, kiâⁿ chhut siâⁿ-mn̂g, ùi chhiū-nâ-á kiâⁿ--ji̍p-khì.
Hó͘--ò͘! Nâ-á lāi ê chhiū-á hoat kah ū kàu ōm, kā kong-chú in 2 lâng cha̍h-tiâu--leh, khòaⁿ bô iáⁿ, thiaⁿ bô siaⁿ, hāi góa soah m̄-chai beh kóng siáⁿ, ah bô lán kin-á-ji̍t ê chiat-bo̍k to̍h seng kóng kàu chia, kám-siā ta̍k-ke siu-thiaⁿ lán “Káu-koài Gín-á-kó͘”, “Pe̍h-chhang-á Kong-chú”!
Chit ê kò͘-sū, sī iû lán Chò-kang-á-lâng Kang-chok-sek chè-chok, Phian-kio̍k: Chiá-siông, Ián-chhut: Bí-leng, Im-ga̍k/Iáⁿ-phìⁿ: Niau-tāu, Jī-bō͘/Kàu-tùi: A-chin in ang. Kin-á-ji̍t ê kò͘-sū thiaⁿ liáu nā kám-kak ū chhù-bī, chhiáⁿ kā gún chhi̍h chán, chù-bûn, tàu sio-pò, lín ê múi chi̍t hūn kó͘-lē, lóng ē chiâⁿ chò gún koh piàⁿ--lòe ê khùi-la̍t! Ló͘-la̍t! Chài-hōe!
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