Be It Till You See It

A sunshine filled conversation with LL and Brad, chatting about everything from Brad’s cactuses to finding the people that make lift your soul. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Brad’s cactuses show
• Finding the things that create alignment for you 
• Pursuing excellence through using your gifts 
• What to do when the elevator breaks down

Episode References/Links:

• Level up MVMT
• The WeLLthy Mindset

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:01  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the fabulous convo I had with Brittaney Delsarte Chatman in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now, go back and listen to that one. And then come back and join us. (Brad: Come back and join us.) Alright, Erika Quest and LL that's me are like about to just like go on tour but at home.

Brad Crowell 1:11  

I was like, "Are you?" (Lesley: No) I got really excited. (Lesley: So, I...) And look, "Really? Wow!"

Lesley Logan 1:14  

I know. I know. Well... (Brad: Tell me more.) Someday, I mean, so we we have stage names. She is awareness. And I am Lady Gaga. (Brad: Oh, yes.) And we're gonna go on tour. But actually, every year since last year, so this is our second one, we've decided to make an annual thing. We created a month long program that is called The WeLLthy Mindset. So with Erika, LL, so WeLLthy - W e L L t h y. I've already sweet about that. I think it's really creative. And I mean, we're real...

Brad Crowell 1:44  

Me too, Babe. I think it's so creative. (Lesley: I'm really proud of it. So,) I'm really proud of you. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 1:46  

So last year, we did it and it was super awesome. We had almost 50 people in a group for four weeks. (Brad: Yeah) And this year we're ...

Brad Crowell 1:54  

It was, it was impactful. We got, I got, I heard the feedback from people, they were really fired up about it.

Lesley Logan 1:59  

I know so that we're doing another one. It's From Failure to Flow. So we've (Brad: Cool) got four pillars on that one, which is like character, construct, um ... courage and consistency. So it's you know, how about a consistency and so what happens is like, each week, one of us teaches a movement practice around that and the other one teaches a business thing around it and so it is really about like moving your body, shifting your mindset and growing your business all in four weeks and so we're doing that you can go to levelupmvmt.com for that. And also but before that (Brad: Before that.) before, but before we can go from failure to flow, I'm I am going to appear on Level Up MVMT for the first time. (Brad: Oh, cool.) I have a ClasterMind. (Brad: Oh, yes, you do.) I mean, obviously if we have Wellthy spelled with two l's, no "a" then we have, we have to have a ClasterMind.

Brad Crowell 2:52  

And that, that is two l's, too. (Lesley: I don't know. I think it's ...) C l l a s t e... (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 2:58  

Well, no, no, no. She does ClasterMind with other people. This is my first time. It's a my talk less teach more workshops. So it's basically really helping, it's for teachers to help their like their themselves and their clients have more autonomy in the method and also like, ditching burnout. I think a lot of times people are talking too much when they teach. And then we wonder why clients are not paying attention to what we said. (Lesley laughs) Because you're talking too much. So anyways, both those things can be found on levelupmvmt, which is mvmt.com. The ClasterMind is on the 27th of March, and then The Wellthy Mindset will be in April. If you're curious about the other Wellthy Mindset, you can actually buy that as an evergreen product. The ...

Brad Crowell 3:42  

The first one (Lesley: Yeah) from last year. And what was that one?

Lesley Logan 3:46  

We did, you know, it was a year ago. So, I'm being put on the spot. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Oops.) But I we actually did a lot on imposter syndrome and your money mindset niche, finding your niche and and it was just a really, really cool four weeks where we got these women from all over the world to truly own their business. And one woman took action right away as soon as we said things and she got like articles, clients like it was really awesome. So you know, these are these are very much actionable steps that we're giving people in these things. And so yeah, you can get that one on the, on the Level Up MVMT already.

Brad Crowell 4:30  

Yeah, so I just pulled it up - Stay accountable and your movement and Pilates practice. Discover, determined and define, deliver your movement and business goals. And then measure and mobilize your mindset.

Lesley Logan 4:40  

Yeah, yeah, I know we are ... (Brad: That was the one.) We love alliteration.

Brad Crowell 4:44  

Ah. I couldn't tell. (Lesley and Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 4:47  

Anyways, Erika Quest is amazing. And I'm so excited to be over at Level Up MVMT on March 27. And then also for The Wellthy Mindset to start to really spend some time in a really awesome container with some epic people. (Brad: Yeah) Okay, so here's the deal.

Brad Crowell 5:02  

You get to ask this question.

Lesley Logan 5:04  

I know. Um, I've been stalling on asking those questions but (Brad laughs) we haven't getting sent. We, I mean, me, but therefore, Brad, so people are DMing me to show these things to Brad. And it's like, TikTok videos about this guy like who's got his plants like, "This is Julie, this is Anna." And then there was another one where people are naming stuff. Oh, a woman has a cactus named Alloy and ...

Brad Crowell 5:27  

Oh, and guess who sent me that? (Lesley: Who?) Erika Quest.

Lesley Logan 5:31  

Erika Quest. (Brad laughs) Yes. And so funny. That so funny ...

Brad Crowell 5:35  

I just watched it this morning. (Lesley: Yeah) It's really hilarious.

Lesley Logan 5:38  

That one Alloy has a unicorn and a house in this whole thing. (Brad: Yeah) And so ...

Brad Crowell 5:41  

He's got like a vacation trailer everything.

Lesley Logan 5:44  

Yeah. So basically, after I got the TikTok with the guy who names the succulents, they asked me, "Does Brad name his cactuses?" So Brad, why don't you give people an update on your cactus garden? (Brad laughs)

Brad Crowell 5:58  

Yeah, so this is Brad's cactus show. (Lesley: wooot) I'm so excited. We have planted three cuttings of of a Saguaro, an Argentine Saguaro that fell over in our neighborhood. And we had to cure them for like months before putting them in the ground. And they are now settled in the ground, settling them in the ground took a week. It was like a whole process. Every day I was out there with like, the right tool and like I'm effectively sifting the dirt so that they don't get blown over and the wind because, you know, there's no braces on them or anything, (Lesley: No) you know,

Lesley Logan 6:33  

And also, like, not even a week later, we had like, 45 miles an hour wind ... It was insane.

Brad Crowell 6:37  

Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I had, you know, batten down the hatches as it were. But (Lesley: They stayed up. They're straight.) Yeah, they're still there. And the ...

Lesley Logan 6:49  

When do we know if they're doing anything, like when do we know if it's working?

Brad Crowell 6:52  

Yeah, yeah. (Lesley: We don't know.) Yeah. (Lesley and Brad laughs) So apparently, the Argentine Saguaros can grow up to 12 inches a year, so they won't put down roots. We're not allowed to even water them until like June. (Lesley: What?) Yeah, no, they go in the ground and then you don't water them for like another four months.

Lesley Logan 7:12  

How do cactuses live? (Brad laughs) I don't understand. I don't understand, I thought they're like cucumbers. And then I need to drink more water to be a cucumber. Anyways, okay.

Brad Crowell 7:21  

So so then then basically, we'll be able to start watering it, the summer, them this summer, and and then we will really start to see you know, it should be relatively dramatic within a year. We're gonna go, "Holy cow, that's clearly taller."

Lesley Logan 7:38  

So they're either going to grow or they're not going to grow and that how (Brad: Yeah) well, know. Apparently this... (Brad: Yeah) Okay. So anyway, stay tuned, but we've got three ...

Brad Crowell 7:42  

No, I have more news. (Lesley: Oh. Tell us more.) Yeah. Guess what? Our purple pancake cactus which you love the one out front by our mailbox? (Lesley: Yeah. The mailman almost kicked it over.) Has like six little buds on it right now.

Lesley Logan 7:58  

Oh cuz, oh my gosh, you guys.

Brad Crowell 7:59  

It's about some like, "boom."

Lesley Logan 8:01  

Okay, you guys. We are like, we are like days away from springtime, real spring. We're in third winter (Brad: Yeah) here in Las Vegas. Well as a time of this recording, but we're probably it currently as you listens in springtime. So watch my stories, because I'm going to be putting up pictures of our cactus flowers all day every day, because they only like bloom for a little bit. And then they stopped but like, I'm really excited for this purple pancake because I love the purple pancake ...

Brad Crowell 8:29  

Yeah, it's really beautiful. And we have a beaver tail in the backyard that's also growing, which is also purple and green. That one's really fun. (Lesley: Yeah) And then ...

Lesley Logan 8:37  

Oh my cupcake is growing.

Brad Crowell 8:39  

Yeah, the cupcake is getting larger.

Lesley Logan 8:41  

She's got little things. I think she's gonna have some babies on me. I'm really excited about her.

Brad Crowell 8:45  

Yeah, and then we have we have an unidentified five foot tall cactus. It's now five and a half foot tall. I don't know what kind of column cactus it is. It's like could be an apple cactus, but I don't think it is. It's you (Lesley: What?) know... Yeah. (Lesley: You don't know what is this cactus is?) It's not quite a pipe organ cactus. No, I can't figure out what it is. Anyway, that one has four, 1 2 3 4, 5 new arms are growing on it. So, (Lesley: Yeah) y'all are gonna see them if you're here with us on the the retreats that we do. (Lesley: Yeah) Profitable Pilates retreat. (Lesley: Yeah) And I'm very excited. And I keep chasing the dogs. They decided that the cactus garden is the obstacle course. (Lesley: Yeah) And they literally run through them. I'm like, "This is, a) you're gonna mess up my cactus, b) I'm gonna have to take a thousand fucking needles out of you. Stop running through the cactus." (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 9:36  

Oh I found a needle in August's head, remember? I was like (Brad: Oh, yeah, right ...) Yeah. (Brad: Oh yeah) I was like, "Oh, my God. I just pulled the cactus thing." Anyways. (Brad: Okay) Alright, well, thank you for asking ...

Brad Crowell 9:45  

Alright, well, I could talk about them forever. Thanks for asking.

Lesley Logan 9:48  

If your cactus, if you would like to have a segment of the show to be about cactuses. Let us know. 

Brad Crowell 9:53  

Yeah, I just bought some century plants. Ooohh.

Lesley Logan 9:56  

Oh my goodness. (Brad: Trouble, trouble.) Okay, well, let's talk about Brittaney Chatman. (Brad laughs)

Brad Crowell 10:01  

Okay. All right. Now let's talk about Brittaney Chatman. A girl full of sunshine, spirit and soul. Brittaney Chatman has a wealth of knowledge in journalism and marketing to now has and she shifted into producing her own music. She is awesome blossom, constantly evolving and bringing her own dreams to fruition. So, I definitely love the two of you kick in these different ideas back and forth. (Lesley: Yeah) You were digging a lot of of gold out of what the two of you were chatting about.

Lesley Logan 10:37  

Just call me a gold digger over here. (Brad and Lesley laughs) Well, here's what I love that she said, "When you are happy that means you're you're doing things that are in alignment with you." And I actually think like ... my dog is letting me know that he is over this. So sorry. But I actually back to what is happiness? I'm in alignment August. I don't know about you. (Brad laughs) Um, I actually, I think a lot. I mean, we had Rob Mack on about, about like happiness islands and finding where your happiness is. And I actually think that it's she's 100% on point, like, when you are happy, you are doing something that's alignment with you. And so if you're unhappy, it means you're probably out of alignment. And so ... (Brad: That's episode three.) Yeah, so she enjoys the process of making a song and it's healing for her. And so you know, you don't have to be a singer songwriter, you could be a knitter, you could be a cactus gardener, you can like ... (Brad: She actually described it as poetry.) Yeah. And so you know, it's like, finding if we're in the, we're in this workshop called The Artist's Way, right now. And like, one of the things to do is go in the artist's states, if you don't know, it's like, making you happy. If you're not feeling, you're in alignment, it's time to go do a bunch of different things and see what happens. (Brad: Yeah) And so you know, she took action. And we as we know, it's the antidote to fear and something blossomed from it. (Brad: Oh, yeah.) I'm really proud of myself for figuring out. (Lesley and Brad laughs) What did you love? 

Brad Crowell 12:08  

Alright, so she said, she said, "Use your gifts to fulfill you first to pursue excellence." (Lesley: Mm-hmm) And I mean, that's like, totally everything we talked about with OPC, you know, prioritizing yourself, making sure you get your own practice in. And when you fill your cup first, then you can actually be there to fill others. And I thought that was interesting that she talked about using your gifts to fulfill you first. You know, as, obviously, we talked about it with movement. You know, but you know, I think it forces you to know yourself, if you're using your gifts to fulfill yourself first. (Lesley: Yeah, yeah) You know, and I think it kind of goes hand in hand with the, you know, if you're happy, then you're doing something that's in alignment with you, like, you know, when you are, when you identify your gifts, they come easy. You know, (Lesley: Yeah) that stuff comes easy to you.

Lesley Logan 13:06  

Well, it makes me think of like, when you looked at StrengthsFinder 2.0 and you took a quiz. And then you like saw, "These are your strengths." And you're like, "Oh, (Brad: Right) those are the things that I actually do over here and over here." And then all of a sudden, you stop seeing some of those things as like, weird things that you did or like, "Why am I doing this?" And you start realize, like, "Oh, this is like the thing that like, I'm actually really good at." And like, then other things flow to you.

Brad Crowell 13:29  

Yeah. Well, the, I think that I knew that I was good at them. But I didn't know what they were. I didn't know what I was doing. Right? So like, I knew that I was like, the guy who organized the band. And like, you know, I don't know, we booked gigs. And we played and got people there or whatever. But I didn't know that I was strategic. (Lesley: Yeah) Right? So like, I didn't know that that was actually my my skill. And that skill of strategy could be applied outside of a band setting. You know, and so actually, I think this is a great pivot into into promoting StrengthsFinder 2.0. (Lesley: I know.) Go figure out your top five strengths because all of a sudden, everything that you're doing in your life today right now and and you know that you're you kind of innately know, "Yeah, this is who I am. I'm good at this thing." But you can't like tangibly put you know a name to it. Changed my life when I could do that.

Lesley Logan 14:26  

Yeah, yeah. So I agree and I think that's going to kind of help you help help, anyone listening to this who does that help you really start to understand yourself more and like the more we know ourselves, the easier it is to do things and Be It Till You See It that just like gonna put that out there. (Brad: Absolutely) Okay, BE IT action items, Babe. Let's go. All yours. 

Brad Crowell 14:44  

All right. Let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action was can we take away from your convo? She said, Brittaney said, "If the elevator stops, just get off and take the stairs." And ...

Lesley Logan 14:45  

Yeah. I love it. (Brad: I thought it was pretty ...) It's like, why wait for an elevator to get fixed? You know what I mean? Like, people do this all the time. They're like, "Oh, well, when this gets fixed, then I'll do it." It's like, well, you could just like ...

Brad Crowell 15:09  

Or "When this happens then I'll do it," (Lesley: Mm-hmm) or "I'm waiting for someone else," (Lesley: Yeah, yeah) you know. And yeah, I mean, you know, the, I think that it's a fascinating idea of stick to itness. You know, like, like the idea of tenacity, you know, being willing to, (Lesley: Well ...) well, what we were just talking about this in our last recap of like, what is the fear? What is the hurdle and getting up over that hurdle? And this ties directly into that were (Lesley: Totally) you know, if the elevator stops, and this is like your path, you're you're riding the elevator, and then like, "It only hit like, floor 15. But we're supposed to go to floor 30. Now, what am I going to do?" You got to come up with another way to ... to get the floor 30. You could still take the stairs.

Lesley Logan 15:57  

Yeah, like Everything is Figureoutable. It's Marie Forleo. But like, truly it is and, and so it's okay to give up on the the original plan to get to the place, but (Brad: Yeah) don't give up on the dream that you, that puts you on that journey anyways. (Brad: Yeah) Yeah. (Brads: Love that. What about you?) Well, of course, surround yourself with the people to lift you up. So (Brad: Yeah) here's the deal, y'all. (Brad: Y'all) You gotta stop like, you got to be mindful of who you spend your time with. Like, I was at Tim Ferriss who said this or does he just keep quoting it? "You are the average of the five of the people you hang out with the most." Right? So if you hang out with a bunch of negative people you're of course going to be on the negative side. Right? So really, like think about lifting yourself up with other people. And I asked this question, I think it was on a podcast, it's coming out. But like, literally, it's like, "Well, what if you only have negative people in your life? Like what do you do?" And it's like, (Brad: Right) listen to podcasts that lift you up. (Brad: Yeah) Consume books that lift you up. So surround yourself with like, was it Hazel Ortega, who said that like J. Lo was one of her mentors. Like just like, (Brad: Right) "I don't actually have..." (Brad: She doesn't know J. Lo.) She doesn't know J. Lo, but like she ... (Brad: "She's my mentor.") She's her mentor. So like, like, literally find a way to surround yourself with people who lift you up whether those people know that you are using them or not. (Brad: Yeah) Because it's going to truly make it easier for you to do things in your world.

Brad Crowell 17:26  

Absolutely.

Lesley Logan 17:26  

Well, I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 17:28  

And, I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 17:29  

Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so grateful you are here. How are you going to use these tips in your life? Let us know by sending us a DM to the pod on Instagram. Share this episode with friends like we are truly wanting to get into more people's ears because the more people are being it until they see it, the easier it is for all of us (Brad: Yeah) to be it till we see it.

Brad Crowell 17:45  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 17:48  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 18:21  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 18:32  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 18:36  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 18:45  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

A story of possibility. A story that shows taking small actions leads to large realities, that you have been gifted a specific skill set, and that a person is never just one thing. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• The beginning of Awesome Blossom, Fabulous and Fantastic 
• Taking your power back by recognizing your purpose 
• Using your gifts to pursue excellence 
• Small goals to achieve a large dream 
• How to figure out your life purpose 

Episode References/Links:

• Instagram
• Twitter
• Call Me Blossom
• Brittaney Chatman Website

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Hey, Be It Till You See It listener. Welcome to the show. What's up? What's up? Okay. Wow, this is a really fun episode. I actually really enjoyed... I was smiling the whole time like I couldn't stop smiling. She is so much joy and you're gonna hear her introduce herself like, oh yeah, you can picture how much joy she is. This is one of those divine appointments, those divine moments of meeting someone because actually, I was randomly in New York in the fall, I got to see Clare Solly you remember her from one of our episodes in the beginning? She's my slingshot friend. And I said, "Yeah, I need some more guests. I need some more unique guests that like really are gonna inspire people because I, I think like we need to hear more stories." When you hear more stories of possibility. And we hear more from more people who are still in the works of it. And she's like, "Oh, you got to talk to Brittaney Delsarté." And I was like, "Perfect, great, do the introduction." And not only that, we get the intro happening within like five minutes of her saying her name, but she'd already scheduled her up and I was like, "I love it. She's a take action person. I'm in." We are recording this during Retrograde. So you're gonna hear some little Retrograde Gremlins taking over her internet. But I the the interview is so good. That just no like it's a word here and there. It's not it's a whole sentence not going to drive your ears crazy. And she has so much love, joy, positivity, and drive. And if you are someone who's like, "I wish I had an ounce of that." I want you to listen because she shares her tips along the way. She shares how she makes it happen. And I really just loved her actions items at the end. They're so honest. And they show so much possibility and they're really like, the this journey we're all on is not linear. Y'all, it is not. And we talk a lot about that in this interview as well. So here's the deal, you are amazing. And I know you're scared. And I know sometimes you don't know what the next step is. But if you can just get freakin' clear on what you're wanting to be in this world. Who you are, it's gonna happen, you're gonna look back and go, "Whoa, look at that," you know. So so I really I really I know, it's I know, it's not easy. I know that every day, there's something weird that happens. I swear. Like, one day, we got a link that was working and in the next day it's not and I'm like, "Why is this happening still?" You know, or one day everything is going really great in some relationships. And the next day, there's an argument and you're like, "What, how did that happen?" And it can be distracting and you can go these things just keep popping up, life keeps getting in the way. And I think it's important that you know, that's all part of the journey you're going on. And it's all part of what makes you "you" and it's what makes you actually stand out and this makes people feel comfortable talking to you and sharing their story with you and and supporting you. You know, we always say it here and nobody wants to be friends with perfect. So stop trying to be perfect. Allow it to be messy. And, and and wear, wear some sunshine, find out your power color is, you're gonna hear about Brittaney's in this episode. So I'm going to stop talking so you can hear the words from her. Thank you for being here. Thank you for listening. Thank you for sharing every episode. It really does make a huge differnce. I'm on a mission, okay and I can't do it alone. And that that means you, means you sharing each episode that you love that brings something to you that teaches you something. If you could text it or post it on Instagram or share it wherever you love to hang out that is going to help other people hear this podcast. So here you go after this brief message, Brittaney Delsarté.

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

All right, Be It babes. Oh my goodness. I have someone so special for you. She came to me by way of a very special woman. We'll talk about her in a second but we've got Brittaney Delsarté and aahhh she is such a bright light and such a joy in her smile... I get to see her smile. If you're watching on YouTube, you get to see her smile. It's just making me have a better day, already. So Brittaney, thank you so much for being on the Be It Till You See It podcast. Can you tell everyone, who you are and what you're up to these days?

Brittaney Chatman 4:45  

I, well, thank you so much for having me. First of all, I wore yellow especially for you. Yellow is my energy color. So I'm giving you the the awesome blossom color. All glow energy of life today. (Brittaney laughs)

Lesley Logan 5:00  

You are, you're such a sunshine. (Lesley and Brittaney laughs)

Brittaney Chatman 5:02  

I try, I try. I mean and we're also in the middle of Mercury Retrograde. So I just feel like everybody just needs some some light, some positive vibration, so I'm here to bring it. Hi everyone, I'm Brittany Delsarté. Awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic. It's my brand. I'm an artist and multi hyphenate person. I'm producer, I used to be a journalist, you know, just exuding black girl magic.

Lesley Logan 5:30  

Ooh, (Lesley laughs) you are, you are. And oh my goodness, I know. While we're recording this, it is Mercury Retrograde. It's like, "Come on," but also the podcast interviews never stop, you have to do (Lesley laughs) whatever's happening. So, so okay, you called yourself "awesome blossom" all these things? When did, when did you become this? You were in, you're used to be a journalist and now you're doing music. So like, what was the journey? Can you take us down the road?

Brittaney Chatman 5:55  

Yes. So awesome blossom started, I was in a pageant when I was in middle school. And the person asked me to describe myself using four words. And off the top of my head. I was like, "awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic." And ever since then, it just stuck with me. But of course, you know, with throughout my life trajectory so far and when I reflect back on, you know, just being that that bright eyed, bushy tailed kid with pigtails and glitter in my hair. Just dreaming of being an artist and just being this multi hyphenate person and see where I am now, I realized that that that name Awesome Blossom, it has a different meaning for me now, because I'm just with in my life, I've I've experienced highs and lows. Right? But it's always, I've always found it fascinating how I've been able to hold resilient through all of the things that I've gone through, and still been able to just set my dreams to fruition. And to do it with excellence and to do it really well. Even though I've, I've hit a lot of obstacles and a lot of you know, curveballs have come my way. So when people say, "awesome blossom," I'm like, "Yeah, like it is because I'm able to do all of these awesome, amazing things. And yet, I'm still learning. I'm still growing. I'm still evolving. So, I'm still blossoming," (Lesley: Oh) you know. Yes.

Lesley Logan 7:24  

I have so much, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like loving it because first of all, we all have the obstacles, right? Like, it's just a nature of the game. And I think sometimes, some of us can like rise through those obstacles. And sometimes we let those obstacles get us and it just depends on you know, what you've been through and what you've said resiliency, and I want to say like, when you say awesome blossom, it almost helps you like even if you're like hit an obstacle, it's like, "I'm awesome blossom." You can't, you can't not go to the next thing. Right?

Brittaney Chatman 7:53  

Yeah, exactly. And that's what it's about, it's about, you know, taking your power back, and realizing that, you know, if you, if you know your life's purpose, and you know what you're supposed to do, you cannot afford to just stay in this tight bud. Like it that is almost too painful than it is to go out and just take a chance on yourself. And whatever it is that you want to achieve, you know, so you can do it. I mean, awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic. Have that confidence and know that you will get from point A to point B, if you just keep working at it.

Lesley Logan 8:23  

Yeah, you're... yeah, I'm like, I feel like everyone's gonna start going around, "Awesome blossom, fabulous and fantastic." It's like a little new mantra, we can all say. And I you know, I have to just point out she said, like, you can't, we also survive, we can't stay that way. It's actually really painful to stay that way. You know, what are like, can you think of a time where like, maybe you were letting yourself stay in your bud shape? And like you you finally got through the blossoming part. Like is there any point in your journey that you kind of just felt a little nervous? Because it is hard and scary to go up against the obstacles.

Brittaney Chatman 8:53  

Yeah, absolutely. Um, I want to say I've always been someone that has never, I've always been fearless. And, I give credit to my family for that, they always nourished my dreams. Anything I want to do if I said, "I could believe, I could fly." They'd be like, "Okay, girl, we know you can. And how high do you want to fly?" You know what I mean? (Brittaney laughs) So when I moved to New York, I actually left my career as a journalist. I was in news broadcasting, and actually got my startup at CNN, at 21. (Lesley: That's insane.) So that was my first... Yeah, it was ...

Lesley Logan 9:30  

Go big or go home. It's like, that would be the scariest place to start being a journalist is like, at the like, pinnacle of like, where everyone wants to probably be as a journalist.

Brittaney Chatman 9:39  

... pinnacle. Exactly and that's where I got my start, that's where I learned. And I had just graduated from college, University of South Carolina. And I was like, "Okay, but why am I not taking these full time positions?" Because deep down inside, I knew I wanted to go to New York and you know, achieve my dreams and see where I can, what I can do with my art and so I got into grad school moved to New York, and 2018 I graduated and I found myself. Billy Porter said it perfectly. It, he called it being an a... "In the Precipice of Obscurity." And I felt myself being in that place where it's like, alright, you know where you want to go, but you still, but you can no longer see the road ahead of you. I'm someone that's a futuristic thinker, I can visualize something futuristic and see the outcome. And it may not come into fruition until months or years later. But it got, it came to a point where I was like, "I'm not sure what direction I'm supposed to go in." And I think it's because I might have experienced postgraduate depression, where you graduate, and then you see other people have started getting married, (Lesley: Yeah) and having families and yet you're still trying to break into such an industry that's tough. Like, you know, there's so many people that want to pursue acting and, and singing and, you know, not everyone makes it. And that's just, you know, that's just me being realistic. And it got to a point where I felt like I was relying more on my, you know, my degree because then I went into marketing and advertising just to survive in New York, because it's expensive here. (Brittaney laughs) So (Lesley: Yeah) you know, I got to a point where I was just like, "You know what, like, it... What if I never, what if I'm never able to leave this? What if I'm always going to be here? And the reason why I came to New York is in vain?" So I, I became fearful, it got scary. But music was the thing that healed me and brought that life and vitality back to me. I felt like I just needed to uplift myself, I recorded my little rap song "Call Me Blossom." It was not meant to be taken seriously at all. But all of these people started coming in the studio. And they were like, "What is this song? But I can hear this on the radio, like, this puts me in such a good mood, like, I love this song. I can't get it out my head. It's so catchy." And from there, I was just like, "You know what, like, I really enjoy the process of making the song. And it was healing for me." So I just decided to keep going. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) And it really it was the music that sustained me and brought me back because being in New York, I don't have family here. And, you know, I I felt like I was I didn't know what I was gonna do. I was like, "Please give me the courage. Let me just figure out what I needed to do to reset." And I think like creating this album, like put me in a place of like, "Oh, now I remember why I'm here. Now I know what to do. (Lesley: Well...) Now I know how to get back to me."

Lesley Logan 12:38  

I mean, I just want to so y'all, Brittaney and I were introduced ... Clare Solly, who is my slingshot friend. We are each other's slingshot friends and she moved to New York. And it's true, like it gets really, it's like LA, it's everybody's there with a dream. And it really is those who like keep at it. It's it's it's not as you can be the most talented. And if you burn out, if you give yourself only six months, you'll you know, like it's just like, it's just time being there consistently and showing up. And I love what you said about Billy Porter's like, "In the Precipice of Obscurity." It's like, it's it is really hard to be there because it's such an uncertain place. And it's, and it's you don't know the road ahead, but you you like have an idea where you want to go and so I freakin' love that. You know, what you just said. How, as you were describing that what I, what I heard is like, you'd be you said, "I came really fearful," and you were a fearless person and then you started taking some action. I always say like that "action is the antidote to fear" that when you take some action and so here you are not a singer yet, not doing those things you went to school for and having what I think Christine Hassler calls it like "Expectation Hangover," like having graduated (Brittaney: Yes) is amazing thing you should be so proud of, and anybody else back home be like, "I'm so proud of her." And you're in this place of like, "I'm lost. I don't know. I'm gonna just go back and do these things, because I need to make some money." But when you took this action of going down and making the song, whatever it was, like, the fact that you were like, "I don't even, it's just, I'm just gonna go have some fun. I'm not even gonna, I'm just gonna do this thing." I think that's where the magic happens because I every time I hear someone stories, I hear the fear. And then I hear action was taken, and then something blossomed from it.

Brittaney Chatman 14:18  

It's true. And the beautiful thing about being an artist and the beautiful thing that I just admire about all artists is that, you know, underneath this, this strong or fearless exterior that a lot of artists have is a lot of vulnerability. And sometimes we use that to serve other people. We want other people to come and get a cathartic experience from us that we don't use a lot of that power for ourselves. (Lesley: Hmm) So for me to go into the studio and to actually write the songs and compose the music and to arrange and to really use a lot of those gifts for me, and it wasn't about like, "Oh, like how many impressions can I get? How many streams I could get?" It wasn't about that it was just about the experience itself. And just writing and really seeing how, you know, the way that I think, the way that I feel, the things that I want in life. How it's changed. How it's evolved. And how I can really pull myself together again with my gift, to, in order to empower myself to get back to that relentless pursuit of excellence, "Girl, you've got this. Trust your gut. It's magical," you'll always put yourself in a position to blossom that way, if you just trust your instincts, and allow your, your gifts to nurture you sometimes. So ...

Lesley Logan 15:37  

I think that's such (Brittaney: Yeah) a great call to action. And I what, what I was thinking about as you're saying, that is, there's gonna be someone listening is going "Okay, but thanks, ladies, I don't, I don't actually want to be a professional singer." And what you're saying is like, it's not about making the money on that gift. It's about using the gifts to fulfill you first. And I like, I think, you know, you said it, like we do things that other people have an experience. We're doing all these things to make sure that other people feel good, that other people are taking care of. And so little are we doing things to like, make sure we're fulfilled, that we're our, our cup is filled and so I really think this is very beautiful. Can you tell me, so you're you're rapping apparently. (Lesley laughs) I'm in the (Brittaney: Yeah) presence of a rapper. (Lesley laughs) So okay, where I'm with your music, because that's what you're doing now? Are you, are you, are you showing up into different like places to sing, open mic nights? Are you being invited? Like where are we at on this journey? Like, what's the next step? Are we, are you just kind of like seeing what happens? You're being famous and fantastic and see what lands in your place?

Brittaney Chatman 16:40  

Yeah, so you know, I'm a Virgo. So there's always going to be a strategy in place. The way that my brain works like, there, there's a method to the madness. So last August, I actually dropped the EP, it's called "Call Me Blossom." So just five songs, just to you know, give people an introduction about me and who I am and not only hasn't given me a artistic rebirth, but for me, I want people to understand where I come from, because yes, I moved to New York, but I'm a Southern girl. So the songs are, are about just my southern roots and my upbringing. Umm, what, you know, my 90s childhood, you can tell that a lot of when you listen to my music, a lot of the the sounds that drift between R&B and jazz and hip hop and dance pop are a lot of like, 90s inspired. Right? And just my poetry. So when I released that in August, I released the music video for the first single, which was Southern Life. And the video did really well it got about 65k views. I just (Lesley: That's amazing.) before... Yeah, thank you. So, so before Christmas, I actually went and shot the music video for my second song, which will be called "Talk to Me." And it's going to drop in February. And I thought it would be very fitting because you know, the song is about love. And it's just about when you finally meet someone, but they don't really want to articulate what they will bring to a relationship because they don't know if they actually really want something long term and sustainable. My song is saying, "Ah ah no. Before you get with me, before I make any commitments to be in the relationship, you're going to have to articulate to me what you're, what you're willing to offer me. Because if I can do that for you, then you need to do that for me." So with that said, with that job, I am planning to do something really special because we're still in a pandemic and I'm still nervous to perform live. So I am going to do a virtual concert. This will be my first one. Um, I'm in the works of producing that with my team (Lesley: So good) and they will... Yeah. And then we'll see what happens but there's definitely a plan and that's how I do it. Like I just allowed myself to have small goals. So the first goal was just, "Alright, like release the EP, get it out. Alright, now let's release the music videos. Alright, once that's released, alright, let's do a live concert so people can enjoy your your music live and get that experience (Lesley: Yeah) from you." And then the next level is, "Alright, like, let's get these deals. Let's see what, let's pitch. You know, let have (Lesley: Well...) the material, show them what you got."

Lesley Logan 19:15  

Thank you for sharing that because I do think people think, "Oh, you release an album you get a deal." And when I can't wait for Brad to listen to this episode because he it wasn't, when I met him he was in a band, he was in a pop band. (Brittaney: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) And and, you know, so I have seen like the behind the scenes on that and it's it's it's hard y'all, but what I love how you broke that down because even if you're not like here, listening to this to release an album y'all, like listening to her. She's like, "Okay, I'm just gonna do this small goal. And then I'm gonna do this small goal." And that (Brittaney: Yeah) really does help boost your confidence because if you look at the whole big picture, get get on stage, book a deal, get an album out there, get representation, it can feel like impossible and also hard to see how far you've come? Because until you hit that goal, you've achieved anything, but you're like, "Nope, I'm gonna just write a song. And then I'm gonna record a song."

Brittaney Chatman 20:09  

Exactly. And you know, the beautiful thing about being a multi hyphenate person is that I was really able to take all of the skills that I've learned and developed over time. I always tell people, the beauty of being a multi hyphenate is that one domain and seizes the other. So I really took my time to say, okay, like, well, I don't have to hire people to market for me or to help me create my brand because as a marketing advertising person, that's what I do on my own. I have a communications degree, I know how to write so I can I know how to pitch myself. I can do my own EPK's. I can do my own social media marketing campaigns. You know, like, I can create creative, direct my own music videos. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) I can executive produce my own projects. So I really took all of the things that I've learned over time, and really invested into bringing this project to life. So I really took my time with it.

Lesley Logan 21:05  

So for the, for the listener, who is like, "What is a multi hyphenate?" They might be thinking like three last names. So can you, can you share, like, what that is? Because I actually, what I'm loving is that you basically wrote down like, "Here all the skill sets I have." But can you just, can you just break it down (Lesley laughs) for the person who might not know if they are one or not?

Brittaney Chatman 21:25  

Yeah, you know, and I'm still trying to figure out how to, like, break that down. But I always tell people, like I consider myself to be like a millennial renaissance woman. Because being a multi hyphenate just means that you know, you, you don't just settle for one, one career (Lesley: Mm-hmm) industry or one career field that you can jump between multiple industries. So (Lesley: Yeah) for instance, like, yeah, like I, I am an actress, I am artist, but I was also in the journalism field as a reporter, (Lesley: Mm-hmm) and as a news producer. But then when I graduated, I went into marketing and advertising. So it's just being able to, (Lesley: Yeah) balance multiple careers at one time.

Lesley Logan 22:08  

Yeah. Well, and also, it's like, the beautiful thing about that is you don't have to like just be one thing. And I think back, it sounds like we're about the same age. I'm an elder millennial, though. (Lesley and Brittaney laughs) Yeah, well, it's... (Brittaney: Where? Where? Why?) Y'all, my birthday is, in two days from this. I'm very... I don't know, when you're listening to it. It's been, it's been passed, but you can wish me happy birthday. But, um, yeah, no, Brad and I are elder millennials. And I have a funny story about about that. But at any rate, I think like, you know, my mom is a teacher, my dad was a manager. Like to, like, you know, back in the day, you had like a title. And now because, like, because of the way the world works, because at how things industries change, because we're allowed to go, "Hey, I only have to work here for four years." You can experience all these different things, and some people would see that as, "Oh, my God, look at me, I just keep switching jobs," and see it as a negative thing. And instead by saying, "I'm multi hyphenate." (Brittaney: Yeah) You're like basically to me, you're like owning all the experiences and show, and using the tools from that to help prepare your career forward. And I think that's really cool. I think if we all stop beating ourselves up for like, changing jobs so much and actually saw it as like, nope, the stepping stones are all going to equal up to like having this handbag of awesome, awesome tools you can use (Brittaney: Yeah) as you need. Right? I think that's really (Brittaney: Yeah) fun. Yeah, no, (Brittaney: Yeah) I was at okay, so I was (it was, gosh when was this?) probably like 20, I don't know, 14 15. I was in this like at this cafe in Montecito, California. Y'all, it's like a tinier town from Santa Barbara. (Brittaney: Oh, wow.) It's like we're Oprah's houses and like Prince Harry. It's like this specific town. Right? So I'm at this the only brunch spot and I'm sitting there working on my computer. And this guy looks over and I mean, like I definitely dress like a kid from the 90s still like you know like I'm an elder millennial. So he looks at me goes, "Are you a millennial?" And I said, "Yeah. I am." He's like, "I knew, I knew you people worked." (Lesley laughs) Like we work a lot. Millennials work a lot. (Lesley laughs)

Brittaney Chatman 24:13  

You know what they're just mad because the week we're at this point in our lives where we're not just gonna stay on some job and be miserable just because it we make good money, okay? You'll be lucky if we turn into two weeks notice. This is a lot worse and we just know that rest is revolutionary that's all ... (Lesley: Oh, my God.) We just learned from the baby boomers and said, "No, we're gonna just do it. We just got to switch it up so that you know we can have more fulfilling lives." No, you know no shade to the baby boomers but you know.

Lesley Logan 24:42  

Yeah, but I think (Brittaney: It's evolved over time.) I I love it. Rest is revolutionary. Oh my God, and he's going to wall but you're, (Brittaney: Yeah) I mean, I think like, I think it is we get to learn from the people who came before us and that is the best thing we can, the best owed to them that we could do is go, "You know, that doesn't look so fun. Didn't look like you're all a bunch of happy people." (Lesley laughs) You know

Brittaney Chatman 25:02  

Exactly. (Lesley: Yeah) Exactly.

Lesley Logan 25:04  

So but I just think it is, I love what you're saying. I think if you're listening to this, it's like, look back and write down all of the best skill sets that you had from every job. I used to be a barista, you know what I was really good at getting people to do? "Put whip cream on that." Like, I was like, "It's only two calories, you can do it. (Lesley laughs) "Enjoy, (Brittaney: Exactly) have some fun in life." But I was a barista. And then I worked at a doctor's office and I then I worked in the mall, and I had, like, all those things lead you up, and they give you some experience that allows you to see the world from a different place. And that's a skill set. And you don't have to do it the way that other people did it because you're different. And I think that's really, really cool.

Brittaney Chatman 25:42  

Exactly. Thank you, I appreciate that. I just, you know, from and I think to the reason why it's probably so easy to do that it's because I've just always been inspired by the future and what it could be. And growing up in my household for about eight years, I was the only child. So there was just me, and my wild, relentless imagination. And so I was able to energize myself with the visions that I've had in my imagination along with what I wanted to see for myself in the future, and then just easily turn those visions into thoughts and then those thoughts into action. And so I always tell people that I'm like, as long as you understand what your life purpose is, or you discover that, then the rest of it is really just easy. It's all about implementation at that point. You know, I, I've always wanted to live a life in artistry for as long as I can even remember. You know, I've always wanted to sing, and write and act and dance and direct and play instruments. And, you know, I understood that, okay, like, I feel like my purpose is, yeah, I just want to express the truest highest expression (Lesley: Yeah) of my creativity, and I want to use that to nurture and to heal, and to just, you know, relate and be of service to people. So as long as I knew that, I figure, alright, as long as I put myself in positions, to be able to make that happen, then I can just trust that, the universe and the spirit will meet me in the middle. And together will will bring it, will bring whatever visions I have to life together.

Lesley Logan 27:15  

Yeah. So okay. Um, couple people are listening and going, how do I figure out what my purpose is? I don't know, how to, how like, is it something that you journaled, meditated on? It came to you in a dream, like, where like, how do you if people are to ask you like, "How do I, how do I figure out my purpose is?" What do you tell them? What worked for you?

Brittaney Chatman 27:38  

Wow, well, you know, I, like I said, I was raised down south, and we're all about community and gathering, and my family, something that we, I mean, I'm just really grateful that we, that we've been doing this is that we gather in the living room or in the kitchen, and we talk. And, you know, my family is always like, ask me questions about "What makes you happy? You know, what do you love to do? Like if you do it was taken away or made you feel like a zombie or that you was just a shell with no life? Like, what would that thing be?" And really allowing myself to write into journal about that. And, yeah, that really helps. And I know it sounds cliche, oh, journal like that. But no, or either ask your friends or ask your family members, like, "Hey, like, what is it that you see in me? You know, that could be helpful in a particular industry." You know, like my sister, you know, I always tell her, she's a, she's a Cancer. Right? But I've always known that she she had this thing about her that's so nurturing, and she's soft spoken, and she's able to, she has this ability to get people to relax and to, to be calm, she has this calmness about her. And so I always believed in speaking life into her saying, "You know, wow, like, you'll be really good at working with children or older people." And now she wants to become an orthodontist and work with kids and then she also wants to be a counselor. So I have people do that for me too. I just have people even down to like the elementary schoolroom nurse look at me and go like I could see you you know, using your voice for good, you know, you just whether it be through song or a public speaking like this, there's just something about you that when you speak openly you stand on a stage people pay attention (Lesley: Yeah) and people constantly speaking life into you. So I think it's also to surrounding yourself around people that you know see something in you and not afraid to speak life into you and to let you know, because that's also can help him be affirming. 

Lesley Logan 29:50  

Yeah. Oh, I mean, there's so many great things in there. I really, (Brittaney: Yeah) I really love that your family ha... I'm like sits around ask these questions to each other. I think like you know, I almost think like for y'all who are still single, listen to the questions people ask on dates and notice when you light up. Because, like, you know what I mean? Cuz sometimes like maybe your family is like, I don't know, watching the television and not asking people questions. But like, start to ask these questions are really great discussion questions. I was thinking, like, bring them on a, on a car ride sit in traffic, "Okay, what are your three favorite colors? What something you like..." But no one knows about you those kinds of things. And notice what comes up, notice what sticks with you. But then you also said, you know, listen to what other people are saying about you, listen to what they notice about you. Because I think we, we are too in our heads around others. And we're not noticing, like, what we're actually putting out there and what they're receiving. And, and it's just feedback, y'all, you also don't like you can also go, "No, I don't think so." But like, listen, because it might, it might spark a thing or, and I know people think (Brittaney: Yeah) journaling is so cliche, but like, I find journaling to be so freakin' relaxing and like it gets the stuff out of my head. Like it just get it out there. And it's like, "Okay, now it's now their space in this room."

Brittaney Chatman 31:04  

Exactly. And that's what it does, especially if you're someone who's over analytical like me, and all you Virgos and even Aquarius is like, we got to, we got to work on that. (Brittaney laughs)

Lesley Logan 31:16  

I know, I know, like, I know, that's... Hello, hence the morning pages and the breath work and the multiple to do lists everywhere like it's, and then I'm like, "I told you that." And they're like, "Nope, never did." And I'm like, "Oh. You're probably right." (Lesley laughs)

Brittaney Chatman 31:31  

Exactly, exactly. But it helps, it helps put things into perspective. And also, when you go back and read those things, sometimes it gives you a aha moment. Talk about Oprah, like, I love when she says like, "Oh, I had a aha moment" because it's true. Because I've gone back in journals and look back and go, "Oh, yeah, did say that I wanted to do that. And like this makes so much sense. Now I understand why I went down this path instead of this path." You know, so it's just, it's an amazing thing to do when whenever you can write these things down, and then go back and read them because you, you kind of see like, wow, like, the way that I've been charting my course, is, is is telling me that I need to go into this direction, perhaps this is what I was meant to do. This is what I was born to do. Because I noticed that from 2001 when I started writing and seeing what happened in writing now, this just makes sense. And this always has been a constant steady thing in my life. (Lesley: Yeah, you're...) So yeah, it's a beautiful thing.

Lesley Logan 32:33  

You're you're right. I mean, like I love the vision board. I need to collect some magazines and do another one because I made a vision board in 2013, y'all and then like, I live in a 500 square foot apartment. So I didn't want my vision board out for like every stranger come through. So I like put it in a closet. And when I pulled it out, like a year later, it was like almost everything on that vision board had been dealt, like done, like and I wasn't looking at everyday, (Brittaney: Wow) but I just made it. Right? And so, you know, it's kind of it's really fun. I've kept it. I still have it. Gets moved with us. Like I'm like this is the original. (Lesley laughs) This is the best one. Oh my gosh, Brittaney, I could talk to you forever because you're just I mean you are sunshine. But you're also full of so much positivity and enthusiasm and I want our listeners to hear. Alright, Brittaney, where can they find you, follow you, listen to your music? What's, what, where do you hang out the most?

Brittaney Chatman 33:25  

Yeah, so you can follow me on Instagram at @brittandbroadway - b r i t t and broadway. I'm also on Twitter at @AwesomeBlossomB. I'm on LinkedIn, I'm on Facebook, you know, Brittaney Chatman, just type it up and I'm there. Also, if you want to stream and tune into my EP - Call Me Blossom. I am streaming on all platforms. So whether it be Spotify, Title, YouTube, whatever it is that you use a stranger's services, please look me up. The support will be amazingly cherished. 

Lesley Logan 34:02  

Yes. Oh, I love it. I love it. I love it. I'm gonna, I'm gonna listen to it. Actually, I'm gonna make and extra Brad does too because I'll be so fun to talk about you and the song when we do our recap. Okay, so people are in love. They're like, you're like the positivity queen and you're just making magic happen in your life. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted steps do you have, advice do you have for people listening to this? What should they be doing to prioritize themselves?

Brittaney Chatman 34:28  

Mm hmm. Wow, um, you know what? Yeah, it's okay to give up. You can give up. Just don't quit. You know, if the elevator stops, just get off and take the stairs. You know, um, when you're, when you're happy. And you're doing things that are in alignment with you. When you're not giving in, when you're not settling. That's when everything starts to happen. So that is why you cannot quit. And also, I would say that, you know, it's not about being dependent on anyone else to give you your heart's desire. It's, it's the work that you're putting into it. And when you decide to plant those seeds, you'll start to see that everything else will unfold, and you will see success, just do not stop. And don't have your expectations so high, especially for people because people will disappoint you. People will undermine you. People will invalidate you. But you have to shed, those people shed those relationships. You need to have people around you that's going to lift you up and speak life to you, and encourage you, believing you're all individuals that you believe in. And if they're in a room without you, and they hear an opportunity that can help you that they will not be afraid to throw in your name. Right? So have those people around you that support you a village, a tribe, a creative tribe, any any type of tribe, it doesn't have to be artistic creative tribe. (Lesley: Yeah) But you know, especially if you are though, in the industry, the entertainment industry at at large. Um, you know, this is an industry where you want to get noticed, and it is about getting attention, but you got to understand that you're not meant to be of the norm, you're not meant to conform at any means to make people follow you. So, understand who it is you are, you have to constantly decipher what you want, and, and what's important to you, because nobody will be able to take that away from you. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) And the other thing that I'll say is, you know, especially I just want to talk to women, you know, we are so celestial. So we we deserve a place in, in any space, whether it be business, corporate, you know, the art, education, you know, we are really able to advance the collective growth, especially of women in any soci... in any platform, at in any society at large. Right? So just stay true to yourself. Understand your power and never let anyone take that away from you.

Lesley Logan 37:24  

Beautiful those are some bold and an intrinsic BE IT action items if I've ever heard them before like that's beautiful. Thank you Brittaney for being here. Everyone, how are you going to use these in your life? Like what, what stuck out to you. Do as a humungous favor, screenshot this episode, tag Brittaney and myself @be_it_pod on Instagram, so we can see those, we can cheer you on, so we can be part of that group that's like, "Yes, you got this." And, (Brittaney: Yes) and also so that other people who need to hear these words, can because it's so much easier when everyone around you is being it till you see it.

Brittaney Chatman 37:59  

That's right. That's right. And thank you so much for having me. Like I really enjoyed... You're right, I could talk to you forever. It's such a safe and fun space. So I appreciate that.

Lesley Logan 38:11  

Ah, well, thanks and I cannot wait. We'll have to do another, we'll have to have one with you and Clare on. Ah ... (Lesley laughs)

Brittaney Chatman 38:17  

You want and me Clare together at once. Oh gosh, (Lesley laughs) trouble.

Lesley Logan 38:20  

I might not get a word in edge wise. (Brittaney: trouble) (Brittaney laughs) Oh my gosh, everyone. Thank you so much for listening. And until next time, be it till you see it.

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production up 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 39:02  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our associate producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 39:13  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 39:18  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 39:27  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 39:39  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

There’s a wall keeping you stuck. How you climb that wall may be easier than you realize. Dive into today’s convo with LL and Brad to discover how and simple mindset shifts to change behavior.   

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe. 

In this episode you will learn about:

• Finding your mission
• Creating your reality with your thought process
• How to believe you are enough 
• Hypnosis vs hypnotherapy
•   The line between where your conscious and subconscious 
• The five fears and getting to the other side of the fear wall

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:01  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the elevating convo I have with Taylor Carr in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one. And then come back and join us. (Brad: Join us.) So Brad is going back to Cambodia soon.

Brad Crowell 1:07  

Yeah, I'm really fired up. I can't wait to be back there. And now that things are settling down with all the travel requirements and all this stuff, you know, plus being vaccinated. You know, basically I get to go fix everything that the jungle has destroyed over the past two years.

Lesley Logan 1:27  

I know. I'm so jealous and also not because I want to go so bad (I want to go so bad.) But I don't want to fix any doors. (Brad laughs) I just want to be there. So, I'm going to let you and made my Dad, go.

Brad Crowell 1:40  

I think it's a combination of doors, electricity, washing machine. You know, what has really gone incredibly well in the past two years as we have an incredible building manager who loves gardening. (Lesley: I know.) Loves it. (Lesley: It's a freakin' beautiful.) And she has turned our property into a jungle, all on its own. And it's (Brad laughs) she was just showing us around. (Lesley: I know.) And it was like, "What? There's a tree there now?" (Lesley: Yeah) How that... It's only been two years.

Lesley Logan 2:10  

Yeah, she planted it two years ago. So that's what happens in the jungle things grow really quickly. (Brad: Pretty cool.) The ear flapping you are hearing is... (Brad: That one was Gaia.) Uh-huh. And Bayon did the ear flap. (Brad: Yeah.) And also... (Brad: He followed.) Oh, we have to put his bed down. That's what's going on here. (Brad: Hmm) Okay, there you go bud. So anyways, um, Brad's gonna be going there. And I don't know, I guess if we haven't recorded episodes while you're gone. I'll just have to have like, past guests take your place.

Brad Crowell 2:38  

Oh! Or I know, I know one person who volunteered.

Lesley Logan 2:42  

I know, Clare.

Brad Crowell 2:44  

Yeah, she's (Lesley: Clare) so excited. She's like ... (Lesley: which is so fitting.) "He could totally take a break and I could take his place. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 2:50  

Well, and it's so fitting because today's guests we're recapping is actually a friend of Clare Solly. She's the reason (Brad: Oh) why we talked to her. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: How about that?) Yeah. So anyways, well Brad can do that. And then we'll hopefully be back to tell you about some amazing retreats we're gonna have in Cambodia soon.

Brad Crowell 3:09  

Yeah, (Lesley: fingers crossed) we're planning one towards the end of this year. So stay tuned. If you're interested in more info on that. Go to onlinepilatesclasses.com/retreats. (Lesley: Mm-hmm, yeah) And you will be sent to the waitlist.

Lesley Logan 3:24  

Wonderful. Did we have an audience question this week?

Brad Crowell 3:27  

We totally did. Which is a really a great question. Somebody DMed saying, "I'm working on knowing my mission. Is there a specific episode on the @be_it_pod covering this subject? If so, which one? If not, would you please record one?"

Lesley Logan 3:43  

Well, luckily, we have some episodes that are gonna be, really great. And, and again, this dogs are doing things they were sleeping until we hit record and then of course (Brad: Literally, yeah.) they are like, "Oh, we should make noise in all the rooms." (Brad laughs) So anyways, here are the episodes for you who was wanting to know about know your mission. Sandra Chuma, episode 17.

Brad Crowell 4:06  

Yeah, she talked about, "How do you know if you've been chasing the wrong thing?"

Lesley Logan 4:11  

Mm-hmm. Yeah. And I really love how she discovered that for herself. And I think it's a really inspiring story. And ...

Brad Crowell 4:17  

Well, I think it's inspired how she discovered it was through a full blown breakdown. So that part of it not so fun, but, you know, the advice that came from that, fantastic.

Lesley Logan 4:29  

Yeah, but I think also like, you're not supposed to take anyone's rock bottoms away. So you know, like that is, yeah, so I think it's really great. I hope the person listening to this is not trying to hit a rock bottom to find their mission, but there you go. Okay, so then we have Kareen Walsh, episode 27 - "Is your hustle now just a hassle?"

Brad Crowell 4:50  

Yeah, anything that comes to like business or mission or future, you know, like, like trying to figure things out. We we always go back to Kareen. She is one of our coaches. Oh, my goodness, she is just brilliant.

Lesley Logan 5:08  

She really is. So listen to her on that and then dive into all of the two things like go to both those ladies on Instagram and just deep dive on them. And (Brad: Yeah) I promise you, you'll be like, "Oh, oh, yeah, this will actually be ..." (Brad: They'll be like, "Oh.") Oh, (Brad: Oh) Oh. Anyways, (Brad laughs)

Brad Crowell 5:25  

I love it. All right. Now let's talk about Taylor Carr. Taylor Carr is a clinical hypnotherapist and a success and manifestation coach. After healing herself from an incredibly incurable, an incurable disease, (say that three times fast) (Lesley: I know) in her early 20s, she dove into the world of natural healing and discovered the law of attraction, energy, mindfulness, sensual healing and the power of the subconscious mind. She now helps people around the world infuse their work with the feminine, and create the success, confidence and love they desire. So this was a very interesting episode to listen to her, talk about how she really felt like the, the, you know, life had pulled the rug out from her (Lesley: Yeah) in her early 20s. When she was like just getting to LA, it was just about to go do her thing. And then it was like, "Congratulations, incurable disease."

Lesley Logan 6:21  

I mean, but also talk about another week of like things happening for you. Because if she hadn't gone through that she would never have made that video and then she wouldn't be on the path that she is. And now she loved what she's doing. And so it is, you know, you can like, "Woe is me." And just like go, "have an incurable disease," or you could take some action and, and go for it. And it's just kind of it's really inspiring.

Brad Crowell 6:44  

Well, I mean, she said it, she actually said, it's the best thing that ever happened to her. And I thought, wow, that ... that is an incredibly powerful statement to to hear, "I had an incurable disease and it's the best thing that ever happened to me." (Lesley: Yeah. And I ...) Changed her life dramatically.

Lesley Logan 7:01  

We have an episode come out in a couple of weeks, where and another similar thing like, injury illness issue that like, basically put her on the path to her career. So super excited to hear that. So, I really loved that she taught ... just about so many things. There's so many things. Of course, I am a SHE-EO, working on it. (Brad laughs) You know, (Brad: Heck yeah) even though I'm not the CEO, but I want to be a SHE-EO. Yeah. But I really did love the knowing you are enough. You're strong enough, you're courageous enough and you can get through it. And I think like, if you are like, "Yeah, yeah, people say that time." No, like, would help. Like, I just finished with Elevate weekend number two, and I had them, we had them on, we had them on mute and I did a breathwork session with them. I had them to say out loud because no one can hear them but themselves, "I am enough," over and over again. And you know how hard it was for them to say it. Some of them were not saying as I can read lips. Either move your lips or you're not moving your lips. And when they started even to saying that, "I am enough." That's when it gets really emotional. Like when you actually say the words out loud, not in your head out loud. And so I think, um ...

Brad Crowell 8:06  

"I'm enough."

Lesley Logan 8:07  

 Mm-hmm. Yeah. And say it again, (Brad: I'm enough.) And again, (Brad: I'm enough.) And like, things change in your body like ...

Brad Crowell 8:14  

... (Lesley: Right) I literally feel like it does ... that was weird. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 8:20  

Right. It's like, it's like, it's like, all of a sudden, it's you are, and now you can't unfeel that and you can't unknow that. You can pretend, (Brad: Yeah) you can pretend and then that's when things get out of alignment.

Brad Crowell 8:31  

It's very vulnerable.

Lesley Logan 8:33  

Yeah, I know. I know. So, but, but that's like, hello, St. Brené - vulnerability is the way. Like, so I just I really love that she brought that up because I think if if even if nothing else resonate with ... in her interview with you like just trying each day to just tell yourself you are enough and remember that (Brad: Yeah) you are going to be, you're going to be unstoppable, unstoppable

Brad Crowell 8:58  

I think that's where the lipstick on the mirror kind of thing comes into play, you know. When you wake up in the morning and it's written right there, you literally cannot avoid it. You can't, you can't unsee that. And you know when I think that it will strike a chord with you again, each time you see it. You know, having gone through that vulnerability with yourself.

Lesley Logan 9:21  

Yeah, yeah, and maybe I'm gonna change I was just thinking I was saying that like as I pour the water from our new pot that takes over a minute and I had to switch my morning routine because it takes a minute to pour this water. I don't know why it takes a minute but it does. So I started doing a gratitude practice while I'm like, "Okay, I'm really grateful for this." And I'm like, "Do you like know how many gratitude you can put in a minute? A lot even talk slow." So ...

Brad Crowell 9:44  

It's got the gooseneck, (Lesley: It's really beautiful.) a thing. And it's, it is but ...

Lesley Logan 9:48  

And it heats water up so fast. I love it. But (Brad: Yeah) anyways, I think I'm gonna write out a bunch (Brad laughs) of like these mantras and put them on the frigerator and then as I'm pouring to say those because (Brad: That's cool.) that I think I've been doing my gratitudes and my morning pages. And so now I'm like, "Well, I already did my gratefulness." And so now I'm just watching water pour (Brad laughs) We're changing it up. Thank you, Taylor. All right, what did you love?

Brad Crowell 10:14  

Okay. Well, okay, so she kind of glossed over this in the middle of the interview, but I, I latched on to it because I didn't quite follow it. And I literally pulled up a bunch of, you know, "Doing what Brad does." I Googled a bunch of shit. And I came back and I was like, "Okay, this is way more clear to me now. And I wanted to pass this along." So she talked about stage hypnosis. Right? And then, and I was a little confused, because I thought, like, that's what she was saying that she does. And I started reading stage hypnosis versus, you know, and then it came down. There's hypnosis and there's hypnotherapy. (Lesley: Okay) Right? And so the stage hypnosis is what you might see in the movies, it's more of an entertainment kind of thing. And I copied all this down here because I'm not an authority on the subject. So according to hypnotic.com - A stage hypnotist aims to put on a show for the volunteers and audience to have fun, have a fun, entertaining time and stage hypnotists give suggestions that only last for the duration of the show. And then they are removed after the volunteers are awakened at the end. Right? As opposed to what Taylor Carr does and what she is, she's actually a Clinical Hypnotherapist. And so it's, it's it's almost, it's a similar methodology. But it's got a completely different end game. It's completely different purpose. Right? A hypnotherapist gives suggestions that are intended to remain beyond the session. Post hypno... hypnotic suggestion this is again, according to hypnotic.com. In order that the client experiences long term change in various aspects of his or her life. And as, as Taylor actually put it, hypnotherapy aims to take long term effects, it takes roughly 20 minutes or so to get into the wavelength right before you sleep, you feel really safe, you're and this is where when your subconscious mind is actually able to come forward and really absorb the line, she says is at that point that the line between the conscious and the subconscious dissolves. And then what she does when you are in that state as her client, all the conversations that the two of you had discussed about the things that you're struggling with or that you want to feel. She is then basically telling your subconscious, those things which are kind of like what we just did. "I am enough." (Lesley: Yeah) "I am enough." Right? But the point is to do it when you're in that, that like phase between conscious and subconscious, so that you're speaking directly to your subconscious and and it can be absorbed. Right? So she then regurgitates the words back into their subconscious mind that they've told her that they want to feel.

Lesley Logan 13:13  

That is, um, I really am grateful. This is our second hypnotherapist we've had on and now I feel like I understand. Now, I feel like I understand hypnotherapy even more. And I mean, it does make me think of like the office, not the office. What's the movie called? The Case of the Mondays. So also the office? (Brad: I have no idea.) Everyone listening knows but you know, like, he was put into hypno...nosis and the guy was like, you know, telling them like all these amazing things to remember. And then the hypnotherapist had a heart attack and died and like left them in that state. He like slept for like days. It was not the office the show, but it was like a movie - Office Space.

Brad Crowell 13:55  

Oh, it's Office Space. It's the beginning of (Lesley: Yes) Office Space.

Lesley Logan 13:57  

Yes, yes. So now I feel like I understand that whole scene more. (Brad laughs) I feel like ... but life is complete. Okay, well, I love, I think there's just go back and listen, if you haven't listened episode, there's so many other points in there because she really does like tell you a lot of things about what she's doing and how she got there. (Brad: Yeah) I think people will resonate with different talking points. And so I love to hear which one you resonate with.

Brad Crowell 14:24  

Alright, so finally let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your convo with Taylor Carr? I'm going to jump right in and say she talked about evaluating your thoughts because they create your reality. So she said looking at your, look at your thoughts to change your reality because thoughts create your feelings and your feelings create your reality. And this, I read this, resonated with me I really connected with this because when I was younger, I I had, like a whole sequence of like, you know, then it turns into what you speak, you know. So you're like, your thoughts create your feelings, and then your feelings are creating reality. But your, your thoughts are creating your feelings, your feelings are going to change how you speak. Right? And your, the way you speak is what comes into existence and it becomes the reality that you're that you're creating. So it's kind of, it's kind of crazy to (Lesley: Yeah) think about that.

Lesley Logan 15:27  

It's like a whole confirmation bias, you just put yourself in a loop and you just stay there and (Brad: Yeah) you prove yourself correct. And so then it becomes a belief (Brad: Yeah) that is really hard to undo.

Brad Crowell 15:37  

Yeah, so if you know, like, like, mull that over, like, think about that, how do we, how we think ultimately shapes our own reality. Right? And so what influences how we think?

Lesley Logan 15:53  

Well, things that we hear, things that we see, people we hang out with, you know ...

Brad Crowell 15:57  

Yeah like everything that we're influenced by, whether that's from, you know, TV, to books, to magazines, to movies, to you know, people to where we you know, how we grew up, you know, the environments that we put ourselves in, all of that stuff shapes how we think. So it's very, very, (Brad laughs) I mean there could be a whole podcast on literally this topic, (Lesley: I know. Let's find the guest.) all by itself.

Lesley Logan 16:20  

Anyways, I real... I agree, I like that one to. (Brad: Yeah) My BE IT action item that I loved is leaving fear behind and doing the thing anyway. She said, "You're never going to be ready. If you wait to be ready, you'll wait for your entire life." I think, like that. I think that you wait so long that it goes by whatever you were trying to be ready for. And so you're like, "Oh, I can't do that. Now. It's been done by a million people. No one wants it anymore." And so then you, then you're almost scared with another idea like you and going back into the (Brad: Yeah) this like vortex you put yourself in and you ... (Brad: Right) The reality is is that like, you know, you're just gonna be ...

Brad Crowell 16:21  

What exactly this, it ties in directly to what we just talked about.

Lesley Logan 16:30  

Yeah, you're you're gonna be scared. You're doing something that you've never done before. You're going to be scared. If you're not scared. You should go see someone I think you might be like a sociopath, narcissist, psychopath. Like, there's something else going on there, you know, like to tell like, I know if you've listened to podcasts ever before. You've heard me say it. But like, I literally do things scared. I'm scared all the time. I'm afraid it's gonna be like, like when Maya Angelou said that quote, like, "Someday, they're gonna find out that I'm talking about." I'm like, "Yep, all the time." (Lesley laughs) And I'm like, "If Maya Angelou was afraid of being found out," then like, y'all, like, she was one of those confident, powerful, like women in the world, right? So I think we've just need to get over the fact that you're just not going to feel ready, you're going to be scared and like, okay, but how, like, what is something you can do to get over that and practice doing that? Because everything you want is on the other side of fear. You remember that guy, Michael Goodman, I think we talked two years ago, and you talked about the five years, we were in that one coaching group with Lori and Chris. And he came on and talked about the five fears. And, and I think you've been said like, "I don't think I'm afraid of anything." I think like he figured out like you were and like because we all have it. But he said, "Literally think of fear as like a wall. And on the other side of that wall is everything you want. And all you have to do is face the fear and you can climb the wall, and you get the thing." But like, we're literally just sitting there on this side of the wall, like hanging out with our fear, instead of having the thing that we want to have on the other side of the (Brad: Hmm) wall. Seek to climb the wall. And then so I just I think like, please, please, please, whatever you're afraid of doing, like just do it. What's the worst case scenario? Probably that no one even knows you did it? Probably like, like, I mean, like, just give it a try and see what happens if as long as you're not gonna die. You're gonna be here another day to try it. (Brad: Yeah, yeah) That's a really ... (Lesley laughs) stiff type duck, you're not gonna be dead. So you can (Brad laughs) still (Brad: So you might as well just try.) might as well try it. (Brad: ... you're not gonna die.) You're not gonna die, (Brad: So, you know,) and then do it again because you didn't die. (Brad and Lesley laughs) Well, they get it, they get it.

Brad Crowell 16:30  

Yeah. I have 100% like, no recollection of that conversation with that guy. (Lesley: I know. I'm looking at you.) I don't know who even that is.

Lesley Logan 19:15  

Guys, I'm looking at him. And I like kept telling the story thinking that it would come. (Brad: No ...) I was in Australia in a hotel room, you were in LA. And I'm going to pull up my notes because I took all these notes. He had the five fears. He's five fears. You're scared of fear of rejection, fear of success, fear of responsibility, fear of failure, fear of loss. And like ...

Brad Crowell 19:36  

Hmm. I'm impress she just rattle those up.

Lesley Logan 19:37  

I share them all the time. I share them all the time, every single fear you have falls under one of those categories. (Brad: Hmm) You know what, let's reach out to Michael Goodman say, "Hey, remember, like three years ago when you gave a free talk in another group. (Brad laughs) We want to have you back for a free talk on these things?" (Brad: Yeah.) All right. (Brad: We're bring him on the pod.) Someone on the team needs to find Michael Goodman. I'm sure that's a very common name. (Lesley laughs) We'll get on it. (Brad: I'm in) Anyway. I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 20:02  

And I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 20:03  

Thank you for so much for joining us today. We're so grateful you're here. How are you going to use these tips in your life? Let us know by send us a DM on the pod on Instagram. Tag us, tag Taylor Carr, text it to a friend. And until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Brad Crowell 20:16  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 20:19  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 20:52  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 21:03  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 21:07  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 21:16  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 21:28  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Natural healing to natural empowerment, today LL and Taylor Carr show how manifestations and archetypes can impact your reality.  

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe. 

In this episode you will learn about:

• Naturally healing interstitial cystitis
• The importance of unlocking your bad girl to allow a fully multi dimensional human
• Looking at your thoughts to change your reality 
• Taking pleasure in the small things 
• Stage hypnosis
• Being HER now
• The five archetypes 
• Knowing you are enough

Episode References/Links:

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Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

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Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Hey, Be It listener, how are you? Oh my gosh, okay, so we're gonna have some fun. This is this is definitely for my ladies in there and Taylor Carr is our guest this week, she reached out to me and I just saw such a Be It Till You See It story that I wanted to have her on and share that with you. And she is really like not only did she now seeing what she was being before, but she is helping other women do the same. And so if you have been struggling, if you are like, "I get it, I get it, I get it." But you are like, holding back, I think this will be a really fun interview to help you step into that power and help you step into that thing. And I really, I really think you're gonna enjoy it, I had some fun, I learned a lot of stuff, I love it. And I just want to say like, it's okay to listen to all this and, and have really good ideas and really good thoughts. And then either forget it, be overwhelmed, or not take the action. I don't want any one of you to ever shame yourself for listening and then not taking action. Because the reality is, is that you're actually putting all this really good stuff into your brain. And there will be a day when it just freakin clicks when you're like, This is the day. And I think, you know, I think it's a lot to put pressure on yourself, added pressure on yourself to be perfect and do the things we're telling you to do that sound really good to you. We're not perfect, and that's boring. Remember, that's what we say around here. Action does bring clarity, though. So what I would say is ditch the perfection, and take the action as you're ready towards the person you're wanting to be. And it doesn't have to be a lot and you'll hear a Taylor say that I asked her a question about like what to do when you're overwhelmed when you're busy. And I really loved her. I really loved her answer to that. So I can't wait for you to hear it. But I just I just had to say that because I do think it's really easy to start avoiding good, solid, awesome advice. Because you're like, Well, I'm not doing it. So I'm just gonna, like I'm wasting their time, you're never wasting our time. You know? And, and the reality is, is that all these doses of goodness, they get into your brain. And then one day, they change your thoughts which change your beliefs, which changes what you do. And so I'm so grateful for you, thank you for listening to each and every episode. Thank you for telling me your bold moments, you can always DM those bold moments, to the Be It pod on Instagram. We want to share those with people and inspire people how you're being it till you see it. And, you know, thanks for sending this to a friend because we grow because of you. And I'm so so grateful. And today's guest happened because of this podcast. She heard it, she had a story. And I was like that's a Be IT thing. So I'm really grateful. And now without further a do, except for that little a do, that happens between now and the guest, Taylor Carr.

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Alright Be It listener, I got Taylor Carr here. And I'm really excited to have you because we have talked about hypnotherapy in the past with a past guest but the way you've used it has been incredible. And y'all I can't wait for you to hear her whole story because what she has been able to do in her life is literally be till she sees it. And she's she's embodying it and teaching women how to do the exact same. I've been looking at what she's been doing on Instagram, and it's really cool. So Taylor, thank you for being here. Can you please tell everyone who you are and what you're rocking out right now?

Taylor Carr 4:02  

Lesley, thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited especially to be kicking off the New Year with you. So thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Hi, everybody. I'm Taylor Carr. I am a manifestation coach and a feminine success mentor. So what I do is I help women manifest the life that has been pinned to their vision board for way too long. And I do so using practices that are very spiritual, but also that are very scientific, like clinical hypnotherapy. And that means rewiring the subconscious to make money, you know, an easier more delicious thing in your life. To make love something that doesn't seem so far away to make the success that you want completely tailored to you. And not this like patriarchal version of what we think that we're supposed to want.

Lesley Logan 4:45  

Oh, I mean, like, right? Like everyone's like, "Okay, I'm so sorry, what? You're gonna help me do take the vision board and be the thing"? Like, I think that's really cool. Can you like, how did you start doing that? Because that is not something like first of all, that's not on a kindergartener. like vision board, like, I'm going to be a manifestation coach ...(Lesley laughs) You know, like so you know, and maybe it is if your mom was one but like, how did that come about? How did you come into this this role in your life?

Taylor Carr 5:12  

So in kindergarten, I'm just kidding. (Lesley laughs) In Kingergarten I learned about the law of attraction. No. So what happened was long story short, in my early 20s, I was diagnosed with an incurable pain disease called interstitial cystitis, it completely affects the bladder, the womb, the Yoni all of these beautiful spaces, and it just completely took away. My womanhood is what it felt like, you know, like I was 21, I moved to a new city, Los Angeles, I was just like, I wanted to get out there, I wanted to date I wanted to do all the things. And I couldn't do any of it. I couldn't drink I had to be like a complete raw vegan, and even that, like was super limited, because I was allergic to citrus, and caffeine and gluten and like all the things, so I was like really eating just kale, if I'm honest, and celery, and then I was going through all these treatments. And, you know, through our, through our medical system, I saw that there was nothing there for me. I was going through really invasive treatments, my legs were open for all these different doctors that were poking and prodding at me. And I was like, like, nothing's happening. Nothing's working. I'm still in extreme pain. It was so traumatic. It was so shameful. And I just remember, like, I went into my doctor's office on like, the fifth treatment. And it was so embarrassing. The liquid fell out of me in in the ah what's it called? (Lesley: the examine room?) The waiting room waiting, (Lesley: oh, gosh) the waiting room in front of people while I was leaving. And they were like, you know, your treatments aren't really working. We could put you on this medication, but you might lose your hair. And there's no evidence that it'll work. And I was like, "What did like that's, that's not, that's not a result. Like that's, that's not helpful." So I remember I came home and I like turned on my little HP computer camera. And I was like, Hello, YouTube. YouTube was like pretty new. At the time, I was like, Hello, YouTube. My name is Taylor Carr, I've interstitial cystitis, I'm going to heal this naturally, or I'm going to die trying. Is basically what my first video said. And I just documented myself trying to heal myself from this incurable pain disease. And what I found was not only was it the diet that helped me, but more so the mindset. It was like the deep rewiring of like my own feminine lineage. The trauma that was in my family, the sexual abuse, all of this stuff that was like literally causing pain in the place where my family had caused, like had pain and trauma, and shame and all of this stuff. So that's where it began. And as I went through my journey, you know, I was just like seeing little elements here. And here, like, felt like full spiritual awakening definitely comes from, you know, being ill and not knowing if you're going to survive it. And interstitial cystitis to be fair does not kill you. But the pain of it has taken a lot of lives. (Lesley: Yeah) And so and so I was just like, like, if I can heal myself from this, other people can do the same. And I was like, coaching people around the world for free. And I got my, you know, I started seeing a hypnotherapist because I became a hypochondriac. Every little pain was like, oh my god, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna get some other illness. (Lesley: right, right) And I saw the power of that. And then the spirituality, the manifestation portions, and all of it, I was like, life gets to be so much easier than what we've been told. So many of us are walking around with these illnesses and these pains, and the shame and the trauma and all of the things. But we're never taught to be present. We're never taught to be grateful. We're never taught to be here and now. And as a women, it's even bigger, it's even worse, because we're actually just told to like, sit down, shut up, be pretty, smell nice. All the things...

Lesley Logan 8:34  

Don't brag, dont' don't talk about those embarrassing things. Like don't talk about your cystitis, because that's gonna, like, make someone uncomfortable. Like

Taylor Carr 8:42  

I had a man tell me you really shouldn't talk about your illness so much because nobody wants to love a sick girl. And I was like, "nobody wants to love a sick girl?". Like, this is my body. This is my life, you know, so so it's just, it was quite the magical journey. And I'm so like, I'm so grateful interstitial cystitis was the best thing that ever happened to me. Because it opened me up to more pleasure, more love, more life.

Lesley Logan 9:06  

Well, you know, that's what's so interesting is I think, you know, it's really hard to say it to someone who's going through something like what you're going through, but like, truly trying to own it and believe that whatever is happening for you, right, like whatever's happening is like happening for you and that you wouldn't be on this journey, you probably wouldn't, maybe you would have discovered some of these things along the way because you seem like a very curious person, but like to literally be living the life that you're living and being this person and taking people on a journey. You would not have explored all of those things or even understood them to the depths you do because you had a hit, not a rock bottom but like a traumatic like a very painful space. And I do think like they always say like that there's like it's the darkness before the light right? Like the like the eye of the storm is like, like all those things. They're not cliches for like, for no reason. They actually are because people have gone through this and what I think is so interesting is, you know what you're doing now. Like what you what you proclaimed on YouTube, right is like you literally were being it till you saw it like, you're like, I'm going to do this. I don't even know ...(Lesley laughs). I'm gonna do this and I think so many people get stuck on like, but I don't know what the next step is and you didn't really have a next step you just were like I'm marking this in the sand. This is what I'm going to start going as and then you took the next steps as you could. And I really hope people are having heard that in your story because it is, it is not easy to do that. Like that's not an easy thing to do. It might have been the easiest thing you did, probably along your journey was proclaiming to YouTube, but I commend, thank you for sharing this because I do think there's a lot of women who have something going on in their bodies that they're either afraid to talk about, don't talk about, think that someone won't love them if they talk about it. But really, like as women, there's so many things that as we talk about them, you know, I am had stomach issues for so long. And when I started talking about them, I found out everyone had stomach issues, and everyone is covering them up and everyone's not dealing with it. Because I want to talk about gas and diarrhea and all that stuff. But like, and I understand when you said like, became a hypochondriac. I it took me a long time to understand that having a gas pain didn't mean I was going to have same stomach issues again ...(Taylor laughs) Actually, no, you just ate too much. Like that's normal. That's a normal digestive process. So I can understand becoming a little bit like on on the on the edge of it. So, okay. You your curiosity took you down this path. One, when you meet with women who are either I don't want to say playing it safe or holding themselves back because I think they're just being what they were told to be. But like, when you're seeing women not step into their amazingness what, what do you tell them? Like what's what do we what do you need to hear? You know, what does that look like?

Taylor Carr 11:38  

There's so many things you know, because I also come from a very traumatic background, of course, you know, this is the oldest piece and it was, you know, the abuse the drug addiction. I lost a parent at 15 to drug abuse, you know, like the codependency. We were homeless after he died. Like all of these things, I realized played into like the perfectionism, the being really small, playing it safe all of that. And so you know, it's so funny. I my clients always joke that they have like a little quote. they're like, "I spank you" cuz I'm always like, "I spank you." But it's, it's, I always tell them like, like, who is your inner bad girl? And why have we locked her away? Why do we make her be bad? Why do we think that the things that she has to say, the feelings that she feels her desires? Why do we think that she's bad? I asked, I asked my clients, let her out of the closet. Have tea with her, sit with her, find out why she wants what she wants. Because if our bad girl is in the closet, or also like to color the lioness, if she's in the closet, then you're not being all of you. You're not being whole and to be the whole woman you want to be, to create the success you want to be to be multi dimensional. You have to be all of it. You have to be bad, good, sexy, dark, light, like all of it. It's important.

Lesley Logan 12:46  

Well, it is 100%. And I can totally understand like, you know, compartmentalizing, and going, "oh, well what will people say? What people think if I like..." all that stuff, and you know, you bring up you brought up the trauma. And I want to we've had some guests who work with those who've gone through trauma in different ways as guests. And one of the things that's interesting is that people are starting to actually look at trauma, they're actually starting to like, understand it in a different way. Like there an amazing book, What Happened To You, and like the more I read that I like, want to reread it, though I've just finished it. It's like, somebody was asking my dog, like, what's wrong with you? And I was like, it's actually what happened to him. Like, we should really wonder what happened to him. And like, because people become people pleasers, based on what happened to them, people become perfectionists there because of what happened. And like, all those things happen. And there's all the stuff you talked about, like ancestral trauma, like stuff that went through your parents that came into you. And so it is, it is not for, like random reason that this happened to you. It's because of all of those things that happened. And because you're a human being everyone else has a different times having those same things and they're locking things away, like, Oh, when I did this, this happen, so I won't do that anymore. I won't be that anymore, because then people won't like me or people will leave or people might pass away. So. So I do love that you have the bad girl they have to have tea with ...(Lesley laughs) (Taylor: Yeah), yeah. So okay, so in your journey of doing this, what what have you seen women be able to do once they step into that power? Like what are some of the transformation stories you've seen?

Taylor Carr 14:16  

I have seen women ask for a raise at work by multiple 1000s of dollars and get it. I have seen women rise into leadership. You know, I was just, you know, just having this conversation with my client earlier, I'd actually love to share it here. She had a very difficult meeting. She's a manager at a tech company. And, and she had a very difficult conversation with a man in his 60s who wanted to challenge her. And she was like, I need to bring the spice and the lion and the fire and the bad girl and all the things. And I was like, listen, you're powerful already. You know, like, we don't have to be bitchy and spicy and all these things like your bad girl is for you. And you can unleash it however you want. But at the same time, like when you are calm in your power, when your nervous system is relaxed your power. You don't have to prove yourself to anyone. And that's the thing that I really want to like drive home is like, you don't have to prove yourself, you're enough as you are, you're powerful, powerful as you are, you've done your training, you've done your work. You know, if you find yourself in a position of getting defensive, then you don't believe that you're actually (Lesley: Yeah) powerful. So

Lesley Logan 15:20  

That's not even Being It like that's like playing another role. Is actually what that is. 

Taylor Carr 15:23  

Exactly. (Lesley: Exactly), exactly. So that was a really powerful moment for her today. I have seen my one of my clients left her teaching job, and then immediately manifested a trip to Mexico with her dream job where she got paid to, like be a photographer for these beautiful women on this on a business retreat in Mexico. And now she's doing it full time completely. She was booked out through the end of last year ...(Lesley: wow) Let's see any anyone else... I mean, there's so many, I'm like ... okay. 

Lesley Logan 15:50  

Okay, those are, those are amazing ...(Taylor laughs) So for the person who's like, "Wait, how do I manifest"? Like 101 manifestation? What do you got? ...(Lesley laughs)

Taylor Carr 16:00  

Manifestation 1 0 1. It's all about your frequency, right? It's all about your energy. And and this is where your subconscious mind is really playing. It's really at play. Because we have these programs, our computer, our brain is a computer. And it runs these programs every single day. And we become really, really used to, "Oh like, I look fat. Oh, I don't look good. Oh, there's not enough money. Oh". Like these, these are on repeat. So the first thing that I would have anybody do is just take a look at your thoughts. Because your thoughts, create your feelings, your feelings, create your reality. And make no mistake, you are always creating your reality, which is like amazing, and also super sucks when we're not super in control of our minds. (Lesley: Right) But it always comes down to like, look at your thoughts. And what do you choose to think instead? I can look in the mirror and think like, Oh, my pores are so big. And I wish that my my double chin was smaller or whatever, you know, or I can choose to think like, well, I'm good enough as I am like, I am beautiful as I am, and and focus on something else. It's really where you focus is where expands in your life. So choose differently. And that doesn't mean we won't go through experiences that are hard. That doesn't mean the shadow doesn't exist. It absolutely does. But it's how you choose to rise. It's how you choose that you deserve something. It's how you choose that you belong somewhere.

Lesley Logan 17:15  

100% I mean, like we because thoughts become like we thought to become facts, but to be careful what we believe because whatever believe like, we're like, that's a that's a fact, right there. It's like actually ...(Taylor laughs) like, you know, so I always like to look for evidence of what I believe to be true. And so like one of the things that I struggled with is like a fear of success. And we're just like a thing that people like watching me for that I'm like, Well, it's because the thing actually when you're when you're raised to think like don't brag because people won't like you. And then also like you don't see people in your family or life like rise to these big things. You actually don't see women create these. Now we do but I didn't grow up with that. So I have to like really retrain like the thought. So I like look for evidence. So when I just heard Beyond Yoga sold for $400 million to Levi's. Like female owned. I'm like way to go lady, I'm like, you know my friend (Taylor laughs) Jamie currently, and I'm like, whoo, $1.1 billion. Love it. Like, I'm like all the ladies like making billions. I'm like, Okay, look at all these women who started from nothing, who didn't have that. Because like, you have to look for the evidence so that you can change your thoughts so that you can change your feelings, you can change your reality and, and it's true. Like if you wake up feeling sick, then what do you say like, Oh, I I don't feel good. I don't feel good. Instead of like, this part of me doesn't feel very well right now. And we start to act like a like we're sick. And then we don't have energy and we don't have we don't have the capacity to make things. But if you're just like, Oh, I'm actually having the sniffles right now this is not feeling really good. I have you can actually change. You can actually still have control over something, you're not how you feel. So I love that because it makes the manifesting even easier, because it's not like, oh, I want this. It's like what are the thoughts that I'm playing in my head? What's the program that's running so that I can have the feeling so that I can actually take the actions from those feelings that make the thing I want to have happen. Love that. Okay, (Taylor: Yes) So, um, you said something earlier, I want to go back to and it's not coming to my head right away. So we'll come back to that. But you know, Taylor, I think for a lot of people, they get stuck in the, "Well that's so nice for them. I'm really busy. I've got a lot going on. I've got all these bills to pay. I've got you know". Da da da. For the very busy person for the person who's overwhelmed and this sounds lovely but this sounds like a dream world. What is the five minute version of it? Like is there a small like it can they dip their toe in? Is there a way that like, you know, like, you know, you can knock the door of the first domino forward for them like what does that look like?

Taylor Carr 19:35  

For you know, I think that for those types of people it's it's pleasure in the small things you know, so if you're walking to your car, and you're like running late or whatever, can you take a moment to like look around and see the cloud formations in the sky and get really present have like, that is really beautiful, or you know, smell a flower that's you know, a common saying stop and smell the roses. Right? Or like a butterfly flies by and that becomes something sacred because the truth is, is that we are in a busy world and things are chaotic. And you know, and there's a pandemic, and there's all the things and it's a lot and all the politics. But if you can just take a moment to remember why life is beautiful every day. That really could be enough.

Lesley Logan 20:13  

Oh, love that. That is yes, because I, yes. I really can't wait for like the sun to start rising earlier because my favorite thing to do on a walk is to watch the sun come up. No matter how low it is. I just love to see the colors. And right now I've been I've been doing my walks. I'm like, the sun is not up until I go on the peloton. This is not fun for me ...(Taylor laughs) Like I don't want to notice the sun on my peloton. I want to notice this when I'm outside. Anyways, this is my own thing that I have to work on. Okay, I know I remember when I was. Clinical hypnosis for the person who is still believing that hypnosis is you know, the quacking like a dog and all the stuff that we've all been seeing on whatever. We raised for raise without on like the Maury Povich show. What a clinical hypnosis and like, how do you know that you need it? What What Why would you seek it out?

Taylor Carr 21:00  

Yeah, so so stage hypnosis is just completely different. It's like a performance act. And it's amazing. And it's not the same process at all, it's completely different. So what I do the clinical hypnotherapy piece of this, it really is like you're going into the deepest meditation of your life, your whole body becomes very, very calm. So this is great for people who are like anxious, or they're really struggling to like slow down, your body gets extremely calm your brains, which is into alpha, and then to theta wave length, which is like that, that wavelength right before you're asleep, right. And when you're in that wavelength, and you're so relaxed, and so peaceful, and you feel really safe, your subconscious mind is able to come forward and really absorb in a new way. The line between the conscious and the subconscious dissolves. So what I do when I get them into the state, which takes roughly 20 minutes of like different visualizations and practices. I then regurgitate the words back to their subconscious mind that they've told me they want to feel. So most of the time I see the fear of success. I see like, there's never enough money. I see, you know, like, I'm not lovable, or I'm not worthy. Like the amount of imposter syndrome in women, like every single woman has it. Right? So it's that like, you, you tell me what you want to feel? And then I hope you feel it on autopilot?

Lesley Logan 22:20  

Well, because the subconscious, like people for like, subconscious, so malleable, you can tell the subconscious anything. But the problem is, is we just, we just thought the subconscious tells us what we've told it before.

Taylor Carr 22:30  

Yeah, and it totally is running the show. You know, it's it's doing everything, every single time that you think a thought that's like, Oh, I'm not good enough to do this. It's because you learned it somewhere else in, maybe in your childhood or in your teen years. And it got stuck in there. And you really believe it now because it's been playing so much. So that's why it does take more I mean, you can get results after one session, but I always say like three to six, because three to six times of me telling your subconscious mind how deeply worthy and beautiful and magnetic and radiant you are. You're going to walk into any room feeling that way and you're not even going to have to try.

Lesley Logan 23:02  

Yeah. Oh, okay. Well, that I'm that maybe I need that ...(Lesley laughs) I, so Okay. Pardon me. So you're working. So I'm doing so many, many amazing things. I want to know like, what are you actually working on being right now? Like, what are you stepping into right now? Can you share?

Taylor Carr 23:22  

Yeah, I'm so excited. I did you know, I'm currently sick entering this New Year sick, which I totally manifested. Because my word for this year was health. And so my body was like, let's get it out of the way. Now. I was like, "Thanks, body" ...(Taylor laughs) But what I'm working on Being is um, oh how do I share this? I haven't shared this yet, actually ...(Lesley laughs) This year for me is less about money in numbers, and it's more about impact and influence. So my work right now is really embodying the celebrity archetype, which is something that I embodied at the beginning of last year when my business went from $0 to eight and $9,000 months within the span of just a few weeks. The Celebrity archetype is one of my five feminine manifestation archetypes. And it's really about being the woman who is unapologetic about exactly what she wants and going to get it. And it's the woman who's not afraid to be spiritual and you know, connected to the universe and all of these things, bouncing my chakras, but also kind of being a bad bitch and wanting to wear sequins and glitter and drink champagne and be all of it at the same time and still allow that to be sacred. (Lesley: Yeah) And you know, I want to have the type of business that I want. I want to have the type of money that I want. I want to have the nice things that I want and not shaming myself for it. So this year is all about stepping into my celebrity. Stepping into that energy of like, I do more podcasts, I, I get on stages, I do keynote speaking, I get in magazines and articles. Less selling on Instagram, less of that hustle and more of being the woman I want to be and having massive impact.

Lesley Logan 25:05  

That's really cool. So I do want to type I don't let me forget I want to the other archetypes are because I think of like, "Wait, what are there five? Let me know. But so, so what you're doing it what you're saying, I don't wanna put words in your mouth, but like right now that you're like, actually to, you're actually making sure that you're being those things like each day, you're trying to do one of those things so you can continue to make your reality that Celebrity archetype. Is that what you're doing? Yeah,

Taylor Carr 25:29  

It's being her now. I have this, this this little story that I tell. And I talked about how like, I was always chasing my future self. I was always like, trying to catch up to her. And the way that I see her in my head, is this woman is glowing, radiant woman in a room filled with people wearing black and she's wearing red. I'm like the woman in the red dress. How do I become the woman in the red dress? And, and, and one day, I was like, "Oh, I just put the red dress on." So every day I'm putting the red dress on (Lesley: and playing a song lady in red...) ...(Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 25:54  

I'm old ...(Lesley laughs) (Taylor: I don't know we might be close to the same age.) That's, I love that. I love that. Thank you for sharing that I was just today in this moment, I was like, I'm just gonna ask people how they're what they're Being right now. (Taylor: Yeah) Just like I just like, yeah, why are we not doing that? Like duh Les. That's like what this podcast is up. So other archetypes so that in case you were like, "Oh, that celebrity one sounds really great." But like maybe what are the other ones?

Taylor Carr 26:27  

Yeah, so they are made up of the Romantic, the Chemist, the Lioness, the Seductress and the Celebrity.

Lesley Logan 26:35  

Okay. Very cool. So the one that stood out to me, what's the Chemist? This one sounds really cool.

Taylor Carr 26:42  

The Chemist, Yeah. So the Chemist archetype is actually the number one archetype that people get when they take my quiz. But the Chemist archetype is is the woman who like they know, manifestation is real. They know the whoo is real, but like, they really need that tangible scientific evidence. They're more into like, listening to Dr. Joe Dispenza. And listening to like quantum science and like, really trying to understand the why that this is happening versus the magic is happening. And that's wonderful. It's like, no, I need the concrete evidence, but I know it's real. But show me the evidence ...(Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 27:14  

So Joe Dispenza is on my audible right now and ...(Lesley laughs) (Taylor: he's all the way to Chemist) like, I'm like, I'm like, love this guy. Love it. He's saying everything I believe, perfect. I just need a I definitely like, like, just give me that. Like, there's a little bit of evidence because, (Taylor: Yeah) because I think like, sometimes I'm like, I'm like, Oh, I know this stuff. And then I find the book that actually validates that I'm like, Oh, well, perfect. Now there's actually sign. So sometimes I just like to have the science because I'm like, I don't want to be the savant. I want to (Lesley: laughs) want to really when someone tells him I just read Joe Dispenza. He's like, really awesome. Okay, so the Seductress and the Lioness. Quick, what are those?

Taylor Carr 27:50  

The Lioness is like the She E O, she is like loving, fierce, that ferocious energy. She's all the way a leader. She's all about compassionate, empathetic, feminine leadership. So that's like, everything is done with love, no matter how ferocious it is. It always comes back to love. She loves nice things. She has the designer handbag, she likes the private jets.

Lesley Logan 28:09  

I'm the lion. I want to be, well I am the Lioness. And I want me to be the Lioness because we're saving for the... I am because I'll just tell you, why. Not that you don't know this about me already. Y'all. We don't have a car because I keep telling my husband not until I can have the electric G Wagen that they're gonna come out with. (Taylor: wooh!) we're just gonna have that and I'm having fun party. And everyone's like, you don't even like to drive. I'm like, I'll like driving that. I will love driving that so there coming a electric version. I want the G Wagen. I like to sit up tall and yes, I will have my Selena, my Louis Vuitton, with my with my sandals and my ripped jeans ...(Lesley laughs) (Taylor: Yes! Lioness vibes all the way) Okay, so I think I think that that's the one that I have to step into for this year. So thank you so much. I'm gonna have to look her up. You must have her on your website. Yeah. (Taylor: Yeah, the quiz is on there). Perfect. So then the Seductress and there was one other. What are those?

Taylor Carr 28:58  

Okay, so the Seductress is what we call the highest level archetype. And it's funny because you wouldn't think that but you kind of have to go through all the archetypes to be comfortable in your Seductress. I believe that the Seductress is the closest to God. I believe that her body her sexuality, her experience, she leads with it. She manifests with it. She has the universe really like craving to provide for her and and this is the type of this is the type of woman who just she radiates confidence. She is all of it. She is orgasmic and proud. She is sexy and proud. She's connected to God, she's connected to her body. And she she really is she really is special. She's difficult to get to she takes the most work to heal, and that's why we call her the highest level. The Romantic is the other one and a lot of people go, "I got the romantic (cries) I don't like like I don't want to do love stuff right now. I just want money." But I always challenge them because I believe that love is actually the center of money. I believe that love is the center of all things in the feminine experience. So for the woman who's able to soften and see that love is a beautiful thing. And she would rather you know, take a beautiful stroll down, you know, the the block during sunset, like, drink her, you know her coffee and it's slow and it's beautiful and she loves the berries at the farmers market. That's really the romantic, she's very present. She's very soft.

Lesley Logan 30:19  

Very good. Thank you for walking through all of those, I think (Taylor: Yeah) you're stepping into the Celebrity archetype. This year, I'm going to step into the Lioness because that's really, um, it's already calling to me, and I just need to (Taylor: Yes) take the next step. So we're going to be that this year. Okay, so this has been really fun. Um, I think a lot of people are like, hold on, there's more. There's more. Alright, Taylor, where can people like find you work with you get to know like, they're like, Okay, "hold on, I gotta step into the Seductress archetype." Where, where can they go to learn more about this?

Taylor Carr 30:48  

Yeah, so my website is upgradewithtaylor.com and you can find the quiz on the website. And actually, that is held with me and my colleague, Sarah D'Angelo. So you'll see some emails come in from both of us. And there'll be like a breakdown of all the archetypes and what you got. And it'll be super fun. It's a really fun experience. On Instagram, I'm at Tayfemme. And, and then on Facebook, I have a private group free group, it's called the Activated Woman Collective. And we have lots of beautiful like trainings and challenges and devotions. And it's a really beautiful place.

Lesley Logan 31:21  

Cool, love that free group. All those will be in the show notes below. So at Tayfemme on Instagram, okay, so Bold, Executable, Intrinsic, Targeted steps people can take to Be It Till they See It. 

Taylor Carr 31:34  

Whooo... you know, I think the biggest thing is leaving fear at the door and just doing it anyway because the truth is, is that you're never going to be ready. If you wait to be ready, you will be waiting your entire life, but when you put the red dress on and you go ferociously and powerfully in the direction of your dreams, you cannot miss. You will not lose and there will be times that are hard, and you have to be courageous enough to get through them and you are. And that's the piece I really want to drive home too, is like you are. You are strong enough, you are courageous enough, you really can't get through it. And on the other side, it's really magical and I really really want you to get there.

Lesley Logan 32:13  

Taylor, thank you so much. I mean I when you say that you have so much conviction and because you say from a place of experience and and you are living it as well and so I do think a lot of people can say just didn't do it despite a fear but like you have actually done that with the with the things you've overcome in your life. So thank you for sharing your story. Thank you for for taking us on this journey. Like I am like filling my fem, I'm filling all my stuff. This lioness is like ready to rock. Watch this. (Taylor: Yeah) She E O over. ...(Taylor laughs) Everyone do me a huge favor and Taylor, tag at tayfemm and the Be It pod with what your takeaways were, what your favorite part of this podcast was? How are you going to use these things in your life? We want to know. I know that we will definitely be cheering you on from the sidelines. And also, it's how more people hear this message. And when all think about it, if all the women surrounding you were doing these things, wouldn't it be so much freakin easier to do these things. So we have to change the collective that we're in because otherwise we're like surrounded by the people with the old messaging. So this is how you change your friends minds so you can change your mind and Be It Till You See It.

Taylor Carr 33:24  

Thank you so much, my queen.

Lesley Logan 33:28  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day! 

Be it till You See It as a production of As The Crows Fly Media.

Brad Crowell 34:00  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 34:11  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 34:16  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 34:25  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Perdoso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 34:37  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

In today’s episode LL and Brad talk about the awareness and hardships of foster youth, where fear leads, and following your gut.  

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Lesleys experience with foster youth 
• The path is not always linear to where you are headed 
• Fosterpreneur 
• Showing up for yourself and following your gut 
• The intersection of opportunity and preparation 
• Fear as a flashlight 

Episode References/Links:

• Profitable Pilates retreats
• The Gift of Fear

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:01  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the eye opening convo, I had with Kelly Slattery and Marisa Polvino in our last episode about foster youth. If you haven't listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us or you can listen to Brad sing again, (Brad: Oh, yeah) cuz I definitely did not leave enough time for them to edit that out and that's fine. (Brad laughs) Okay, well, so as we speak, today is Mama Lisa's Birthday. (Brad: Whaaat) Happy birthday Mama Lisa.

Brad Crowell 1:20  

Happy birthday Mama Lisa. If you're wondering who that is.

Lesley Logan 1:24  

That's my mom. (Brad: Oh, here we go.) And she goes by Mama Lisa to everybody. (Brad laughs) (Brad: Yeah) And it's her, I mean shout it out because whatever. It's her 60th (Brad: Whaaat?) birthday.

Brad Crowell 1:34  

That's a big deal.

Lesley Logan 1:35  

I know. This year, we got her 60th, your 40th, my dad's 70th. I'm the freaking youngest one here. (Brad: Yeah) Thank the Lord.

Brad Crowell 1:42  

Yeah. (Lesley: Anyways) Those six months, whoo! (Brad and Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 1:48  

Oh get planning on your birthday because I'm already planning mine. But um, anyways, Happy birthday Mama Lisa, we love you.

Brad Crowell 1:54  

Happy birthday.

Lesley Logan 1:55  

You too can wish her happy birthday. I actually don't know her Instagram handle as we're speaking but I don't even know that she just does it. But she's (Brad: I was gonna say, I don't think...) on Instagram. She's Lisa Friesen. And she will love it. She'll love the shoutouts. If you want to just actually ... to do this. If you want to just screenshot this podcast and put "Happy Birthday Mama Lisa" and tag me the @be_it_pod. I will send them to her. So let's just do that. Let's just do that. (Brad: That sounds fun.) Yeah. So we'll just shower her on her birthday.

Brad Crowell 2:27  

And now I'm on a mission. I'm gonna find it.

Lesley Logan 2:28  

I know. I think it has numbers in it. It's, you know. Okay, the other thing that's happening right now is that we're in the middle of the Profitable Pilates in real life, (Brad: Oh, yes) retreat.

Brad Crowell 2:41  

It's happening all around us (Lesley: Oh, my God.) this moment.

Lesley Logan 2:44  

Bassness. It's so freakin' awesome. (Brad: I think, it's technically badassery.) It is badassery. (Brad laughs) I love it. I love it. I'm into it. So everyone arrived yesterday and we are in deep and workshops today. (Brad: Oh yeah) And, you also you too, can actually snag one of the last few spots left because we opened up the doors for the next in real life business retreat.

Brad Crowell 3:08  

That's right. If you are feeling all the FOMO right now A. (Lesley: of course you are) should be, (Lesley and Brad laughs) B. get yourself to the next retreat that we are going to host here in Vegas, in the fall.

Lesley Logan 3:24  

Yeah. We're in the fall, oh my gosh, the weather and the fall. It's like the best days of summer wherever you are minus humidity if you're from the south and so y'all are welcome we actually rent out Airbnb's for y'all. We take care all of it. You just have to get yourself on a plane, get your booty here and we have self care and all and that is involved with all community. And all the tactics that actually are what you need to grow your business. (Brad: Oh yeah) And and I actually love that we're talking about this on this episode because it goes with some of my talking points you know when we get to them you'll hear why. But the reality is is like you cannot, like you can absorb all you want on a podcast (thank you so much) on on social media. You can take all the courses but there is something very special unique about getting in person down and dirty into your business with other people doing the exact same thing. Brad and I have made sure we've done in person business stuff. Gosh, since 2018 and (Brad: Yeah) it's changed our world. So anyways, profitablepilates.com/retreats.

Brad Crowell 4:29  

Yeah, (Lesley: So all details are there) just just make the deposit and lock in your spot. (Lesley: Yeah) Don't wait because the last one filled up in literally a week.

Lesley Logan 4:37  

It sold out in a week. Mm-hmm. Yeah, did. Oh, my God, I'm frickin' I'm in love with my week right now. Okay, so babe (Brad laughs) you have a question?

Brad Crowell 4:46  

Yeah. Okay. So, I decided that thank you for submitting your questions. But I decided to push everybody else off a week, because I have a question for Lesley. (Lesley: Okay) And, I kind of this question comes from the convo that we had in the last episode, where we were speaking with Kelly and Marisa. And something I didn't know about you was that you have a big heart for foster youth. And, you know, the foster care program. You have some experience with that. And when we were first talking with the ladies, a couple months back, that was news to me. (Lesley: Oh, I know, you had no idea.) Yeah. (Lesley: Okay) So I wanted to ask you to share your story and your experience.

Lesley Logan 5:41  

So y'all we were, we were just having a call with Kelly. I didn't actually know we were gonna have this call. We're on the road and Brad's like, "We have a meeting with, you know, this company." And I was like, "Okay," I was actually not feeling super hot. And I was, we're even driving for a week at that point. And I hadn't showered for quite a few days. So anyways, we get on the call. And I'm really excited because once Kelly started talking, I frickin' obviously, as you heard, fell in love with her and Marisa and their mission. And anyways, as you heard on the podcast, we were looking for particularly a retreat or a treat. Clearly, I got retreats in my mind, were looking for a charity that had to do with, you know, climate change and things like that for OPC. And I...

Brad Crowell 6:22  

I'm like, super passionate about plastic waste. (Lesley: Yeah) I can't deal with it. (Lesley: He can't deal.) It makes me like, it frustrates me beyond, I can't understand how much plastic waste we create as a so... a so... (Lesley: society) society. (Lesley: Yeah, that's a lot of whistling there.) It frustrates me. Yeah. shh shh shh. I know.

Lesley Logan 6:40  

I hijacked the charitable organization at that moment because to be honest, I as we're talking with Kelly and Marisa and their mission on this planet, and what they're doing with Barely Canadian. I said, "Oh, I'm obsessed with foster care." I'm I like, I'm really truly like, obsessed with it. And so, so what I did was, I just said, "We're gonna donate this year's OPC donations to one of your organizations." And Brad was like, "What?" And I was like, "Well, I grew up with the fos... with foster care in my life. Well, here's what happened. So growing up as a kid, I, my parents, my dad worked for the post office, everyone. So the the funny joke growing up was, I was, my father was the mailman because I guess like back in the 80s. The joke was like, "if the baby didn't look like the dad, then it must have been the mailman." I don't know, weird jokes, anyways. But my dad was mailman. And one of his co workers from, you know, like, mail times was this guy and his wife who had three girls and they're really young. And they had this huge property, huge massive property. And they had this big house, all these spaces, and their daughters were getting older, and they like missed having young kids. And so they became foster parents. (Brad: Hmm) So we would go to their house because either their daughters would babysit us or we would go to their house. And they had all these kids all the time, all the time. And like there was cribs with babies, and there was kids of all ages. And I just grew up knowing about foster care and foster youth and like that these kids were there because either their parents were going through some hard times, or like they really were careful to make sure that I treated these kids as like, they are just part of the family. (Brad: Yeah) And my parents tried to be foster parents, but we didn't have an extra room for fos... the foster kids. So we couldn't be foster parents. (Brad: Gotcha) So my parents actually took in teenagers who were kicked out of their parents house, because... (Brad: Oh, my parents did the same.) Were they pregnant because my mom... (Brad: No, no) (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 7:59  

They were, they were usually guys.

Lesley Logan 8:56  

Oh, yeah, no, ours were pregnant. And I think each time when they got taken back home because their parents finally let them in. My mom was sad because she loved the babies. But (Lesley laughs) anyways, anyways, that's another story. So I, but what's funny is I grew up lining my dolls up and adopting them I was never the mom, I would just adopt like I just thought that's what you did like it's just normal thing everyone does babies. And um, so anyways, I just have this passion for people who work with the foster care system because it is, look it is, it's like, it's like, it fostering dogs has more like win (Brad: support), more support (Brad: Yeah) and also like just more, there's just more out of it like when you foster kids and youth, it's it's actually like really freakin' hard because there's so much trauma that comes from it. Kids are getting pe... they get bounced around. (Brad: Yeah) And it's just really ...

Brad Crowell 10:03  

Like establishing trust is not even impossible, I mean.

Lesley Logan 10:06  

And the people who are foster care parents? Foster, (Brad: Yeah) whatever, (Brad: foster parents) yeah, they, they themselves are a special unique person, because they're less likely to be business owners or people who are working 40 hours a week and more like people who have the ability and have the time. But maybe it's just, it's just hard. So anyways, here's the deal, what I saw was, babies get adopted all the time. And when the kids are over five years old, they're not getting adopted. (Brad: Right) And I saw this with as a child, because, you know, I would go over there and like the babies would disappear but the older children didn't. And my parents' friends would actually ended up adopting several of these adult children, and that that they were allowed to adopt. And that's beautiful and that's amazing. But they couldn't adopt every one of them. And also, like, I never was the person who is like, I'm going to like, go and have kids in my life. But what I do see is, are at least in this particular country that we currently live in. The as we talked about in the episode last week, the majority of the homeless population is because of foster care systems. So these 18 year olds, they they age out whether or not they're still in school or not. Can you just imagine, like, imagine how you were at 18?

Brad Crowell 11:30  

I just want to clarify, I don't, don't, I don't know if majority is the right... 

Lesley Logan 11:34  

Yeah, they said (Brad: were) over 50%. (Brad: They said over 50%?) Yeah. Marisa is very in on this. (Brad: Oh) Yeah. (Brad: Well, the that's...) (Dog bark) 30% of the homeless is, is from the foster care system.

Brad Crowell 11:45  

We actually met a whole bunch of kids who lived in the park near where we lived in LA, (Lesley: Yeah) who, now that I'm aware of this statistic (Dog bark) makes me wonder if they were also part of the foster system.

Lesley Logan 12:00  

Yeah, it's like, it's a really sad thing because like, I don't even know how you fix the problem. So what all these different charities that are working with, you know, foster care and foster youth and helping out with adoptions. They're really trying to do the best they can to, to work within what the system is. And I I. So I am passionate about it, because yes, we lived in LA with lots of homeless people. And they're homeless for a variety of reasons. And then I grew up with this. And so I, I just see, like, how, how can we help the future adults in this world have love, support and possibility. And if you grow up, you know, Tiffany Haddish, she also was in the foster care system. And she has a charity where you actually give your used suitcases to (Brad: Yeah) to foster kids because they move around so much. And they most of their clothes get put in trash bags. And her whole idea is like, if your clo... if you are moving with a trash bag, then what else are you supposed to think about yourself? And like having a suitcase (Brad: totally) makes you like, like, that is (Brad: a human) a human being. (Brad: Yeah) And so anyways, like, (Brad: totally) y'all, I teach Pilates, I teach business. If I didn't do any of this, I clearly I have a thing for the kids in Cambodia and for the and the youth here that don't have that, that may not see the light at the end of the tunnel. They may not see possibility that I was given. I was told if I work really hard, I can have whatever I wanted. (Brad: Sure) But that's also because like, even when I was homeless, I wasn't homeless, you know. And these kids, if they're homeless, we're talking, they're homeless. And so I just this is why I'm very passionate about it. I'm freaking obsessed with Barely Canadian, I'm obsessed with Echoes of Hope and, and Kidsave and what they're doing. And if, if, if ... watch out (Lesley laughs) if I end up getting involved too much, I may just be like, "Oh, who else is teaching?" (Lesley and Brad laughs) But anyways, this is my thing. And while we currently are not fostering or adopting, I don't think it's outside of the realm of possibility for us, but for right now. We'll take our our extra income and give it to those who can use it to help these kids.

Brad Crowell 14:28  

Yeah. Well, thanks for sharing that. Definitely ...

Lesley Logan 14:32  

It's a long story. Sorry, everyone, but that's the question. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 14:35  

No apology needed. Not at all. Yeah. Okay. Now let's talk about Kelly Slattery and Marisa Polvino. (Lesley: Aren't they the coolest duo?) Yeah, they're really, they're really ...

Lesley Logan 14:48  

I can't wait. Also, Marisa posted some tennis shoes. And she's like, "Yeah, these are up my alley." (Brad laughs) And I was like, "Oh, well, me too." So we are, so amazing how like attracts like.

Brad Crowell 14:59  

So, a connector, a Canadian and a creator. Kelly Slattery is a former film producer, actor, singer, singer songwriter, oh sorry songwriter and singer, a foster care advocate with a heart for foster youth who are aging out of the system. Kelly founded Barely Canadian with her two foster kids. Barely Canadian is a social enterprise that donates 20% of proceeds to nonprofits that support foster youth. (Lesley: Yeah) And Marisa Polvino is a passionate film producer and founder of Straight Up Impact. A content agency that creates thought provoking work, works, including feature length films, to drive positive social change. Partnering with Barely Canadian, Marisa is also dedicated to showcasing the systemic issues in the foster care system. And I think she even referenced it on the episode. She's working on a documentary about it right now.

Lesley Logan 15:55  

Yeah. So I mean, I mean, obviously, these two women knew each other. And ...

Brad Crowell 16:00  

Yeah, they've known each other for a long time. (Lesley: And it's ...) And Kelly said that she started it. And Marisa was like, "Why am I not involved?"

Lesley Logan 16:07  

Yeah, I love it so much. And I hope that like you're inspired by that in your own way. But um, I think it's so interesting, because if you look at their bios, you might not even expect them to be doing this, because like, they're singer songwriters in the industry. (Brad: Sure) And so I challenge you listening to this, like you... you don't have to, like have gone a certain linear path that leads you down this road. Like a road to doing something that you are passionate about, like, you didn't even know, I was like (Lesley laughs) that I wanted to support this. And we found a way to, to weave it into the thing that we already are an existing and doing and so I just love what they're doing. I love how they're using their connections, their their skill sets, and, and the power of the community that they've already cultivated. And then they're learning along the way like this inspiring AF. 

Brad Crowell 17:01  

So it's, it's really cool. I mean, I if you go back and you look at Barely Canadian, I thought it was really neat to see her kids like so they started it because they wanted to create an example for their two foster kids. And she and her husband were talking about and they're like, "What if we started a business that they could participate in, to show them that we don't necessarily have it all together, either. We're still learning we're growing, we're figuring it out." And what a better way, then to create something that they can get excited about and start to see actual impact through the way that the company is growing, and then working and donating and supporting these other organizations. So I thought that was brilliant.

Lesley Logan 17:52  

Yeah, I really do love it. And I love their mission behind it because obviously, she is working, she's adopted one and they're working on adopting the other. (Brad: Yeah, exactly.) Yeah. So that's really cool. (Brad: They both in their teens.) What we didn't get to talk to about which we'll bring them back for another episode is their fosterpreneur thing. And I share this with you because you all if you're listening to this, and you want to make an impact. Like, if you can help teach people. It's that whole cliche, is it a cliche? Is it a meme? It's like, if you if you teach a person a fish then they can eat forever, like the thing? (Brad: Oh ...) What's the thing like the it's ...

Brad Crowell 18:31  

Hold on. Give a fish versus teach them to fish.

Lesley Logan 18:34  

Yeah to give them the fish they eat for an evening, if you teach them fish they eat forever. So it... they all can look it up. Anyways, um, they know what I'm talking about. To be honest. It's been around.

Brad Crowell 18:43  

If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. (Lesley: Yeah) If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime. (Lelsey: Yeah, so...) I guess we'll call that a parable. (Lesley: A parable) I don't actually know what it is.

Lesley Logan 18:53  

Yeah, it's like ASAP stables. So um, so what I loved about the fosterpreneur thing, and oh my gosh, if, like when we're involved, watch out. Like, (Lesley laughs) I feel like I'm so excited about this because (Brad laughs) what I do love about it is like, I can only imagine if I knew how to run a business 15 years ago, where I would be (Brad: Right) today ...

Brad Crowell 19:16  

 At 15 or whatever. (Lesley: Yeah ...) I don't know how old their kids are but yes.

Lesley Logan 19:20  

Yeah. But if I, but when I was a teenager, I didn't even know you could work for yourself. I lived in a town where you worked for other people. (Brad: Sure) And you had to ask for a raise that was 25 cents an hour. And so I didn't know that you could actually work for yourself. And I love about this fosterpreneur thing is like let's just say these, these kids don't end up with parents. Right? This program really does teach them how they can create their own business and what what Kelly is doing with her with her kids is showing them this because you know what the other the other side of the coin is like where the world is going is the more, you, they is that people who have ideas that are going to leave this world. If you have ideas, and so I just love it so much. I'm so into it. So anyways, one of the other things that they said, obviously I'm in love with them, they're my new best friends. Is Kelly mentioned, like learning as you go and learning with others. And I love this because perfect is boring. You don't have to have all of the I's dotted the T's crossed before you hit go. Like you. Sometimes just like starting the engine, you're gonna get some ideas, and you're gonna learn from your mistakes. And like, it's better to do that than like, wait, wait until you know everything because you're not going to know everything. There's all the way technology changes on a daily basis, the way that social media (Brad: Yeah) changes every frickin' week. You know, it's like get started and then the learning with others. It's like being in community like, she has Marisa and then they're and they're working, we're collaborating together.

Well, I mean, it goes right back to the kids. Learning as you go and learning (Lesley: Yeah) with others. Right? So she's learning and with her kids and setting an example for them.

Well, it's an example that like, you don't have to have all the answers to get started. (Brad: Right) And I, gosh, can you imagine? Like, what if that was what you were told when you're a kid? If that was ... (Lesley laughs) (Brad: It's pretty powerful.) I love it so much. What did you love that she said or they said? (Brad: So ...) This our first duet.

Brad Crowell 21:24  

Yeah. (Lesley: It's a they) Is it? Yeah, I think it is.

Lesley Logan 21:27  

Mm-hmm. We (Brad: Alright) we have a threesome coming on. But ... (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Trouble, trouble.)

Brad Crowell 21:31  

I really loved when Marisa was talking about showing up for yourself and following your gut. And I thought, I thought that this fit in totally with, you know, be it till you see it. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) Because I actually, you know, it made me what it made me think about was my coach who told me, "Brad, you are using language that is non committal. And you're not even committing to yourself."

Lesley Logan 22:09  

Oh, who said that?

Brad Crowell 22:11  

Adrian said that. (Lesley: Oh) My coach.

Lesley Logan 22:14  

When is Adrian coming on the pod?

Brad Crowell 22:16  

Yeah, great question. Yeah. We're gonna have to, we'll have to get him in. But he, you know, show up for yourself and follow your gut. And the show up for yourself part really, like struck a chord with me, because, you know, what is showing up for yourself mean? It sounds good. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) But like, what does it mean? Right? And, and that's, I think that we, we make a commitment to our jobs, we'll make a commitment to our kids, our families our whatever, that kind of stuff. But then like, when it comes to making the commitment to, to Brad, to me, I've just kind of like, "Well, that's all good, whatever, like, I don't really need to get up and do my workout." I don't really need to, you know, whatever. Like I said, I'd eat healthy, but I'm only letting down myself. So it's all good. You know, and, and Adrian really challenged me on that because my, my, the the lack of boundaries that I was setting for myself was actually spilling over into the rest of my life without me even realizing it.

Lesley Logan 23:25  

Oh, yeah because you (Brad: Yeah) can't you can, we all can feel like we can compartmentalize, but you actually can't. (Brad: you know ... well, yeah) You're the same person, everybody the same.

Brad Crowell 23:34  

So so for me, it was deadlines, right. I was like, not really committing to a deadline. And then that meant when with the team, I was not holding the team to deadlines, either. And I didn't actually realize that, that that was happening. So anyway, showupping, show up for yourself and follow your gut. So the second half of that, following your gut, that's interesting, you know, there's a lot of intuition there. And there's a lot of like, you know, being in tune with your, yourself, your body. But there is, we have these notions that just happen to us, like, "Do I trust this person? Or do I not trust this person?" And even though you know, like, we have the mental capacity to override our gut, because of the way we think.

Lesley Logan 24:25  

Well, logical. (Brad: Right. Yeah) That's not what you're supposed to do, though. (Brad: No) It's intuition.

Brad Crowell 24:29  

Yeah. And following your gut, you know, it's, it's ...

Lesley Logan 24:34  

We quoted this book already, "The Gift of Fear." We quoted it like two episodes ago, y'all frickin' read the book ...

Brad Crowell 24:39  

I was, I was gonna talk about, I was gonna talk about our dogs.

Lesley Logan 24:42  

Oh, tell me about the dogs. How amazing they are at not being great. (Brad and Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 24:47  

Yeah, about how many times they've already barked in this episode a lot. (Lesley: This episode, specifically.) No, like I think that it's a common you know, preconception that well, dogs know, when a person's trustworthy or not (Lesley: Mm-hmm) No, they that's like the I would say that that's what most people would, would say. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) And I think that we also know when a person is trustworthy or not.

Lesley Logan 24:48  

We do. This, so in the in, so the guy who wrote the book - The Gift of Fear, he literally did an interview saying, "Your dog barks that person because you don't trust that person."

Brad Crowell 25:25  

Right? So it's actually the dog reflecting you. (Lesley: Yeah) You're just aren't in tune with you.

Lesley Logan 25:30  

No, cuz you're (Brad: Yeah) using logic to go, "Oh, if I don't get an elevator with this person, they're gonna think that I'm being judgmental." No, you didn't like that person. There's something in you that was like, "Hmm, this is not a good person." And now you're trying to like justify, like, "I don't want to be mean. And I want to be a bevers..." Get in a different elevator. Your dog doesn't like that you don't like that person. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 25:51  

Right. Yeah. Yeah, totally. (Lesley: Yeah) Anyway, I thought these two things were incredibly profound. And she had just said them in one sentence, "Show up for yourself and follow your gut." And I was like, "Let's dig in."

Lesley Logan 26:06  

Let's dig in. And also like, I would love to know what that means for you. If you're listening to this. I mean, I love these I think just that can be, you can make your own personal definition of that. And I hope that you all do. Okay, (Brad: Yeah) BE IT action items.

Brad Crowell 26:18  

Alright, so finally, let's talk about the BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from our convo (Lesley: I know cuz you were on the episode.) with Kelly and Marisa? Yeah, by the way, if you didn't see me on the episode, don't worry. I was still there.

Lesley Logan 26:34  

But if you're listening to the episode, you did hear him. So (Brad: Yes) there you go. And if you're watching, you still heard him you just watch someone else's face. (Brad: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) Okay, what did you like? (Brad: Yeah) What did you get?

Brad Crowell 26:45  

So you know, Kelly had a quote at the end that she attributed, attributes to her dad and I thought it was amazing. And he said the harder you work, the luckier you get. (Lesley: Yeah) And I love this for I think that there's like this... First off, I don't want to promote working like 80 hours a week kind of thing. That's not what I, that's not what this is but... (Lesley: No, quality over quantity. But...) Yeah, I think there's an intention about moving forward and you know, it allows you to be prepared for when the iron is hot. Right? And and when you are on your game and focused and really moving the ball forward and an opportunity comes across your plate... (Lesley: Well, isn't that what luck is...) Right? You're you're prepared (Lesley: opportunity meets preparation) you're you're ready for taking advantage of that. (Lesley: Yeah) You know and then yeah becomes you know, that's the luck (Lesley: Yeah) kind of thing.

Lesley Logan 27:47  

Opportunity meets preparation equals luck. (Brad: Yeah) And I love this quote by her dad. I don't know why I'm seeing like the scenes of like, you know, the babe... and like league of their own but I am. (Lesley laughs) No and I think it's like, I think a lot of people are waiting for the right opportunity to put in the work and the reality is is that like showing (Brad: Yes) up (Brad: that's exactly) and doing the best you can.

Brad Crowell 28:18  

I will, I will work hard when the right thing comes around.

Lesley Logan 28:21  

When the right thing comes around. "Well when this happens then I'll actually put the work in. Well when this happens then I'll do this. Well when this "(Brad: Right) Wow, you're gonna wait for a frickin' long time (Brad: Yeah) and what I can tell you is like, we are very intentional, we have goals, we have a calendar, we have a launch calendar we have all these things and yes, dates get moved, things get shifted, new surprises come in, Brad didn't even know that I was interested in foster care. There's divine opportunities that happen. But if you're just waiting until hmm someone's gonna call you, someone's gonna suggest something, you're like, you all be waiting for a long time.

Brad Crowell 28:56  

Or or it's like we end up waiting for like the "right time" to do the thing whatever the thing is, right? So start a business, start a family, quit your job. (Lesley: You know what?) It could change, move, like all these things there's never the right time.

Lesley Logan 29:13  

You know there is not and I tell you as every one of my friends who had a baby never got pregnant when they are expecting to (Brad: Sure) and then somehow figured it out. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 29:21  

Right. So yeah, yeah.

Lesley Logan 29:24  

So anyways, I think I just really love that quote from her dad. (Brad: Yeah) Kelly's Dad, thanks so much. (Brad: Yeah) And again, I do agree that it's not that you're working 80 hours a week or 100 hours a week. It's just that you, you put in legitimate effort towards what you want and and and it will, it will absolutely like luck will happen because opportunity meets preparation and boom, you're in the intersection. (Brad: Yeah) You don't want to be one block behind when that happens. You're gonna be pissed. Maybe honking my horn for yourself. (Brad laughs)

Brad Crowell 30:00  

At yourself. (Lesley: Yeah. Okay ...) All right, what about you?

Lesley Logan 30:03  

Don't let fear guide you. So I think fear is like a flashlight. It is showing you actually like, oh, this scares you. And on the other side of the sphere is like what you really want. And it's a place, it's like an opportunity to do some healing, some explorations, some curiosity around you. But it's not the guide, because if it guides you, you're just gonna stay in your comfort zone. But guess what, we've talked about this before your comfort zone gets smaller, actually gets smaller, like you become, like you become less okay with things. You know, because the that you were okay with before because like, the, the earth, momentum doesn't stop, the earth inertia doesn't stop. So everything is expanding, expanding, expanding. And so what happens is because you're in this comfort zone, the world is expanding, and you, yours is getting smaller, because it's been big ...

Brad Crowell 31:02  

Or even if yours is staying the same, it's actually getting smaller, (Lesley: Yeah) because the world is expanding.

Lesley Logan 31:07  

Thank you, thank you for making that shorter, and more concise. (Lesley laughs) So anyways, I just, you know, there's five fears that Brad and I learned about from a life coach we loved, which is there's a fear of success, fear of responsibility, fear of loss, fear of rejection, fear of failure. And pretty much every fear you have falls into one of those five. And if you can actually identify the fear, like literally go, "I'm having a fear of success right now". Then A, it actually like takes like literally goes like it just the power is taken away from the fear, it can't guide you. And therefore you can get curious, you can explore, it can be the flashlight of where you need to work on things, and also what you actually care about, like what you care about, right? And then you can go on the other side of this wall of fear is everything I've wanted. So don't want to guide you because it's taking you away from what you want.

Brad Crowell 32:02  

Well, I was just looking that up. Can you go down those five again?

Lesley Logan 32:08  

Yeah, I think it's from Mike Goodman. I want to say it's Mike Goodman. Chris Goodman? We have notes on this is from 2019. (Lesley laughs) Okay, here they are. The five fears are...

Brad Crowell 32:22  

Five primal fears.

Lesley Logan 32:23  

The five fears are - the fear of success, the fear of failure, the fear of, of responsibility. Fear of success, fear of failure, fear or responsibility, fear of rejection, (Brad: rejection) fear of loss

Brad Crowell 32:40  

and fear of loss. Yep.

Lesley Logan 32:42  

I really do think his name was Chris Goodman, or Mike Goodman. And sorry, Mr. Goodman for confusing your name. (Lesley laughs) But we're so grateful for you.

Brad Crowell 32:52  

Maybe Ken Goodman?

Lesley Logan 32:53  

No, no, no, (Brad: no), no, no, no.

Brad Crowell 32:57  

Anyway, the ... I feel like, what this made me think of ... 

Lesley Logan 33:02  

His name is Chris Goodman. (Brad: Chris Goodman) Chris Goodman, hello. It's not my fear. It's not my mind. It's the fear and the mind from Chris Goodman. "Everyone is processing the thought and fear according to their framework" as another quote from him. We need to have him on, let's call him up. (Brad: We're gonna do it.) But you should ask yourself, "Do I have a fear of failure? Do I have a fear of success? Do I have a fear of responsibility? Do I have a fear of rejection? Do I have a fear of loss? If I do this next step? Am I going to blank insert the fear. (Brad: Hmm) So if I do this, am I going to be afraid of what?" And so that was like such an eye opening thing because I had no idea and a fear of success. Like who does that? Who has a fear of success? Who has a fear? Me this one, right here. And so, so but some people have a fear responsibility. So figure out what your fears are. We'll get Chris on to explain this all to you because clearly, it's not our information. (Lesley laughs) Well, there's being it till we see on the spirit coaching thing, but, I'm really, I just love it. So.

Brad Crowell 34:07  

Awesome.

Lesley Logan 34:08  

I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 34:09  

And I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 34:10  

Thank you so much for joining us today. We are so grateful that you're here. How are you going to use these tips in your life? Which fear do you have? How are Kelly and Marisa story inspiring you to do something that you have no idea how it's going to work out? (Brad: Yeah) Let us know by sending a DM to the pod on Instagram, and we'll catch you on the next episode.

Brad Crowell 34:28  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 34:31  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production up 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 35:04  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 35:15  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 35:19  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 35:28  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 35:40  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

This eye-opening convo exposes the reality many foster care youth face and shows what following passion instead of a path can achieve. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe. 

In this episode you will learn about:

• The backstory to Barely Canadian 
• Tackling a large problem and believing in the impact
• The foster care system and “aging out”
• Learning as you go and learning with others
• Leading with your heart for success 
• Finding something that you want to be a part of 

Episode References/Links:

• IG @barelycanadian
• Website Barely Canadian
• IG @kellyslattery
• IG @marisapolvino
• IG @straightupimpact
• Echoes of Hope Website
• Kidsave Website

Guest Bio:

MARISA POLVINO

Co-CEO/Founder STRAIGHT UP FILMS and STRAIGHT UP IMPACT

With a career spanning over three decades, Marisa Polvino is a prolific producer and entrepreneur with a skill for identifying, packaging, and producing quality, star-driven entertainment across all genres and budget levels. Presently, Marisa is Partner and Co-CEO/Founder of STRAIGHT UP FILMS a fully integrated multi-media production company that has worked alongside top-name Hollywood talent, including Natalie Portman, Rosario Dawson, Jesse Eisenberg, Gina Rodriguez and Johnny Depp.

Polvino identifies and shapes projects that align with the company's ethos. Presently, she oversees a top flight feature slate which includeHow to Set a Fire and Why, directed by award winning director/actress Lisa Edelstein, Dissonance, a YA love story set in the multiverse directed by Catherine Hardwicke, Joseph Merrick - The Elephant Man to be directed by Rupert Sanders and a film adaptation of Viktor Frankl’s iconic memoir Man’s Search for Meaning.

Recognizing the profound effect cinema can have on culture Polvino co-founded Straight Up Impact. The companies mission is to create, produce and finance thought provoking content that appeals to human emotions, shifts perspectives and inspires positive social change.

Polvino uses her entrepreneurial spirit and know-how and focuses on forging relationships with likeminded partners while also overseeing much of the company’s business strategy, development, marketing and operational structure. In 2019, she created the “Power On” series for Google’s computer science in media division which was a short-film series directed by leading actresses and designed to promote greater gender and racial diversity in STEAM fields. Polvino is currently producing the "Meaning in Madness" film series which centers around the systemic issues contributing to the mental health crisis facing young adults and teens today and the importance of meaning and purpose in their lives.

Marisa is inspired by her two children and encourages them to follow their passions, pay attention to what matters most in life and to always work hard and be nice to people.

KELLY SLATTERY 

Kelly Slattery, a native Canadian and songwriter by trade, made an interesting progression from writing music for such companies as Lionsgate, CBS and Disney, to writing screenplays and producing for film, to philanthropy and now, Barely Canadian, her social enterprise clothing line.

Down for Life which premiered at the Toronto Film Festival, was Kelly's first feature, followed by subsequent Lionsgate projects like House of the Rising Sun and Cougars Inc, with Hijacked and Breaking Wind soon to follow, released by Anchor Bay.

Kelly was a founding partner of Therapy Content, the production company for Dave Grohl’s Sound City and Sonic Highways, and was fortunate to touch so many impactful products, although she eventually ventured off on her own after selling one of her TV comedies she co-created with Lee Aronsohn (co-creator of Two and a Half Men) in the room to ABC networks, along with signing a surf drama to Legendary Pictures. Whilst in development on her own projects, Kelly works as a consultant in the Film and TV space; developing, packaging and setting up projects at various studios.

Kelly felt inspired to step into the nonprofit space years later, when she and her husband adopted their then 16 year old daughter from foster care. Starting at Venice Arts as the Director of Advancement, Kelly was quickly recruited by Film2Future as their Executive Director and went on to increase their operating budget by 83% in her first year while deciding to complete her family, Kelly and her husband foster to adopt her then 16 year old son.

Barely Canadian was created to show their children that an idea can become a business and how to see an idea through to fruition. The moment friends and family got their hands on Barely Canadian, they quickly knew this business training idea had just become a company. As a Social Enterprise company that supports foster youth, it was important for the brand to feel as "home" and cozy as possible to align with their messaging about helping foster youth find their forever homes, hence Barely Canadian's mainstay of super soft clothing. Barely Canadian is proud to share that they source and hire all locally and donate 20% of our profits to foster youth organizations like Kidsave and Echoes of Hope.

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Hey Be It babe, what's up? Okay, I this is just I'm like glowing. I'm like can't stop smiling. I have two guests on today's interview. Two women who, gosh, their, their passion and purpose, like what they care so much about. It's like, freakin' like, it's contagious and like, like the only best way can get a contagion can be. Anyway (Lesley laughs) anyways, like it really is though like every time I get off a call with them I am sitting a little taller, flying a little higher, buzzing a little bit faster. And, and Brad actually joined today's interview as well. So we have a foursome. In fact, I met Kelly, because of Brad. And Kelly and Brad go way back in time. And Kelly is such a connector, which is why we're probably like, just to like kindred spirits there. But um, Kelly and Marisa have this amazing company Barely Canadian what you're gonna hear about. And I really can't wait for you to hear how they answer all their questions. Because I think that too often we're trying to figure out how do we organize all the thoughts? How do we organize all the dots before we start something. And that's not how things work. And even if you could connect all the dots, even if you had everything in place, and you're like, "Okay, I've got the plan. I've got the plan, here it is." Something is gonna come and rip that plan right out, water is gonna spill on that plan you're gonna miss, you're gonna lose a couple of those dots. And that's okay. And that's what makes that but it's also what makes you realize what's worth fighting for. And so these two women are super, super passionate about foster youth, and the organization's could save and echoes of hope. And they have a social enterprise, which is like they created a product that I can't wait for you to touch in your own lives. And it supports these organizations. And, you know, now more than ever, I think it's really important that we follow our passions and our purpose and it really does make you light up and make you want to show up when you're scared to death, to do something. So these two women are really doing something for a great cause. And they don't have all the answers to how they're going to do things but they are being it till they see it as they do it. And I'm really passionate about what they're doing. Brad and I are so freakin' stoked to be working with them and find different ways to collaborate with them and I can't wait for you to also witness that journey because we are still figuring it out. And that is what makes it super super fun and I can't wait to see how we can continue to support them in all our ways with our Profitable Pilates business and with OPC. I just the more more time and more excuse I can do to spend time with these women and what they're doing I will. So without further ado, here is our first two guests interview and with Brad joining in so it's special treat and I hope you enjoy it and I really can't wait to hear your takeaways. Please tag us, tag @barelycanadian. And let us know how this affected you? How this helped you? How this show do some light and some inspiration? All right, thank you so much. Here it is.

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

All right, Be It Till You See It listeners. We have a very exciting adventure for you right now. There has there's not only one guest, there are two guests and Brad's joining us. So we have (Brad: What? woot woot woot) we have an actual foursome happening (Lesley laughs) on this podcast. Um, you've got Kelly Slattery and Marisa Polvino, I hope I said their names correctly. And I am just really delighted to bring these two women to you. They are doing something so amazing. And there just proof that like taking an idea and just going for it no matter how many obstacles or what people might think about going into a somewhat crowded market. And they're doing it because they care so much about a special cause, I'm not let them tell you about but I just I had to have these women on because they're I think they're going to inspire you to Be It Till You See It and not let, not let anything get in your way. So Kelly and Marisa said thanks for being here. Can you each introduce yourselves?

Kelly Slattery 4:37  

Yeah, Marisa so you go ahead (Marisa: What?) and you'll talk... I always talk first. (Lesley laughs) You have to realize that I'm gonna be a gentle lady and say, "You talk first." (Lesley laughs)

Marisa Polvino 4:46  

Good morning Be It Till You See It people. Um, my name is Marisa Polvino. I am a film producer and content creator. I have a company called Straight Up Impact which creates thought provoking gain content around global issues that are most urgent. I also make films but I've been over the years moving more into the social impact space because my heart and my soul needs to be a little more fulfilled than what the customary film industry can do to one's heart and soul. (Lesley laughs) And Kelly and I've been friends for a long time and I and when she launched Barely Canadian. As a social enterprise company, I immediately wanted to jump on board with her and help build out one some of the most snugly, softest, comfy where ever but also one that provides money towards foster youth and supporting foster youth. And I happened to be making a short film about uncovering the systemic issues in the foster care system. And what we can do as a community to come together and help these foster youth live a fruitful, powerful, beautiful life after the foster care system after they age out. (Lesley: Oh) So that's about me and you can find me on Instagram at @marissapolvino and at @straightupimpact.

Lesley Logan 6:07  

Amazing. Okay, I want to dive into that but we have to we have to hear back from Kelly first. So Kelly, tell us how (Kelly: So many) got here.

Kelly Slattery 6:15  

Gosh such a tale. I'm a, I'm Canadian. My name is Kelly Slattery. And I came to America because I had a song in a Lionsgate Soundtrack, American Psycho 2. And I was an artist in Canada. So I was like, "I'm gonna move illegally to Canada, I mean to America," (Lesley laughs) to your country. And so I made the journey. It was interesting that later on in life, I actually wrote a TV show about that experience of being an illegal alien, it was about, it was about an illegal Canadian who lives in with illegal Mexican family and works in construction. We did sell it to ABC. I had the co-creator of Two and a Half Men and Big Bang, as you know, my showrunner. So I went from like, then I started producing films. I was a founder of a company that we produced for Dave Grohl. We did Sound City, we did Sonic Highways. But I left actually pretty much when I sold that show that I had written. And then we had another... Anyways, I've always been involved in entertainment, as a as a songwriter, as a singer, as a producer, and as a writer. And when we adopted our kids, initially, my daughter from foster care at the age of 16, I decided to convert my life to service and so I joined the nonprofit space, which was really interesting. And, and really challenging. And, and it's unique. Let me, let me just leave it there as calling it a very unique space, you know, but I learned a lot. And I learned that what I really want to do is something that makes a difference in the world. I always reference this film I had done for Lionsgate that I produced in Michigan, it was overnights, it was winter, it was exterior, it was awful, because (Lesley laughs) it was freezing and just like like physically traumatic, I would say just the cold even as a Canadian, which is why I'm called "Barely Canadian," because I'm always freezing. But anyways, I realize this ended up in the Walmart bin for 2.99 on sale. I gave two years of my life and my heart to this, I'm not doing this anymore. So trying to really find purpose in my life. When we adopted our son, we're actually in the process of adopting our son, we brought him into our family, we wanted to show them that an idea can become something and just with little steps and progression and just like due diligence of basic, you know actions every day or every week, you can build something. So that was the purpose of Barely Canadian was to show them how to be entrepreneurs, how to acquire basic business skills. And anyways, long and short people really liked the product and boom, it's it became a company. And we give 20% back to foster youth. And Marisa started coming to the pop ups I was doing and she just was like, "I love everything about this. Can I participate?" I'm like, "Hell yeah."

Brad Crowell 8:59  

Did you know, did you know each other prior?

Kelly Slattery 9:01  

Yeah, we had been engaged in some film projects together and and just became really fast friends. When Marisa moved out here from New York. So

Marisa Polvino 9:11  

Yeah. I moved in New York, Kelly was the first one of the first people that I met outside... Well, wi... within industry, but outside of the industry friends that I had when I moved here and we fell in love immediately. It really was love at first sight.

Lesley Logan 9:24  

Well, (Kelly: Yeah) you all have that because I, Brad's known Kelly for a long time. But as soon as I got a call with you both I'm like, "Oh, I'm in love with these women. These women are amazing." (Marisa laughs) We are donating to their cause... (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 9:35  

She was talking about you both for like a day and a half later. (Lesley: Yeah, yeah.) (Kelly: Oh my ...) It's really a great convo.

Kelly Slattery 9:39  

Well, we can find kindred spirits, right. Like I think we connect because we were connected already. (Lesley: Yeah) I think, you know, and we're taken by your gorgeous red hair. So that's why we're here. (Lesley laughs) Yeah, and then with Marisa the whites of her eyes were so white and I didn't want to shoot you know, but honestly the whites over eyes are so white. It's extraordinary. (Lesley: Oh my gosh) I remember that when I first met her.

Lesley Logan 10:04  

Oh, ladies, I love you... I so I want to go, Marisa, you said something. And maybe the two of you can talk about this, I kind of feel like working, doing a social enterprise, working in a nonprofit space trying to make an impact, you almost have to be like, act as if what you're doing is making the difference that you are hoping to make some day because it is so I don't know, I won't answer the question for you. But I feel like it's so hard to show up every day for a cause that has so much systemic problems, that if you don't act as if it's like, what you're doing is making the difference on a daily basis. It's kind of hard. So can you speak to that? Like, what is it take to? I think a lot of people want a part of social impact. And like, what does it take to do that? Like, how do you start?

Marisa Polvino 10:50  

You want me to start? (Lesley: Yeah) Well, I mean, I think everything is hard, right? Whatever, whatever you endeavor to do, is, it is like pushing that boulder up the hill, and finding certain projects, be it in the film side of the things, or in an apparel line. If you have a passion around what that product is bringing to the marketplace. And if you strongly believe that that messaging, that brand messaging around it, any kind of a product is one that the world needs, and that it can enact a change that is most vital, then it's easy to get behind it. Because everything, everything is difficult. And you know, somebody, many, many years ago, you know, one the persistence of vision, but two like, if you do what you love, the money, the success, whatever it is that you're hoping to achieve from it will follow. And to not just lead with your passion, lead with what you love to do. And what the messaging is and what what that content, that material, that peril, whatever that is brings to the world can add value to your soul and add value to your audience that you're presenting it to. And I think what's really easy is you know, like I'm wearing this sweatshirt. Yes, it is like shameless promotion. But it's also like really super comfortable. I was taking my dog for a walk earlier, I had the sound like, "Oh, I'm just... I was not intending to wear it." but like, "Oh my God, it's so comfortable. I don't want to take it off." (Lesley: Okay...) And ...

Lesley Logan 12:22  

I have to say yes because I have three Barely Canadian sweaters and I wore them five days in a row. Like I just, I went through a cycle ... (Lesley laughs) (Marisa: I can't take it off. I was waiting) 

Kelly Slattery 12:31  

You know actually ... Lesley texting you need one for Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, (Lesley: Yeah) Saturday, Sunday, like the designated and I thought we should do that. Remember how they used to do underwear? (Lesley: Yeah)

Marisa Polvino 12:41  

It has the labeled underwear? I was just thinking. 

Lesley Logan 12:42  

... I'm so glad you picked up on that because I was like, "I hope she knows I'm talking about. I'm talking about when you were a kid, the underwear." (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Slattery 12:51  

Yeah. Yeah, (Brad: That's a...) But a kind of, I think it's a great idea - is a fun little throwback though, you know. (Marisa: I love it) Why not?

Brad Crowell 12:57  

I think somehow I missed that one.

Lesley Logan 12:59  

I don't think they had it for the boys. I think it was a (Lesley laughs) 80s girl thing.

Kelly Slattery 13:03  

... wonder rose. We had wonder rose. (Marisa: We had wonder rose.)

Brad Crowell 13:06  

Wonder rose. No idea what that is.

Kelly Slattery 13:08  

It gotta be in northeast thing. (Marisa: ... underwear)

Lesley Logan 13:11  

So um, so you know, Kelly, you you started Barely Canadian. Before that you mentioned you wrote songs. And you know, you have this incredible story about like, a vision you had you you were in your grandmother's house? And can you actually talk about that? Because I do think, you know, Barely Canadian came from the all the little steps along the way. So can we go back in time a little bit.

Kelly Slattery 13:35  

It's so funny. You should say that too because I do think that Barely Canadian is everything I tend to do is like an ode to my country, to my country. (Lesley laughs) Like it's always like a salute, some kind of call back, some kind of like love letter, you know, to Canada. But but when I was, I had wanted, ultimately I, I'll go back even a little bit more just to disappoint you in lengthening the story. But so I... had moved to Ottawa. I had heard about an open mic across the street. A friend of mine said, "You should go." I said, "No, I'm not, I don't sing anymore." Long and short she made me go. The place asked me to start playing there the next day. I hadn't like sung in forever. My sister came down heard me playing at this residency. Bought me a guitar. And she said, "You need to actually learn how to play the guitar because you cannot depend on other people." With from that moment, nine months later, I recorded my very first album. I'd written all the songs. I recorded the album, and suddenly I found myself in HMV superstore. I was the, I was the only album blockbuster carried nationally. But I did all of that myself, right. So, I believe in, I think that was the empowering moment. You learn how to learn, play the guitar, you learn how to record yourself, you learn how to do all of this shit. Because if you think you can bank on anybody else, you cannot and it's really empowering is as disabling as that might feel. So for me, I had received this guitar my grandmother had passed. I'm sitting as I offer didn't say amongst a garden of clothes on the floor, just kind of distraught but watching the Grammys on this really shitty TV. And I thought, "I'm going to go there." Like, "I'm going to go there one day for sure." You know, and I wrote this song called My Life. This life is on its way, it's actually on my first album, and, and it was like this kind of up, happy, happy song. Cut to two years later, I'm invited to the Grammys by EMI, which is pretty incredible, you know, then cut to about 15 years later, and we had done a film with Dave Grohl, that the album was nominated for a Grammy. And so we went to the Grammys. And coincidentally, I brought Marisa as my date.

Marisa Polvino 15:40  

 (Lesley: I love it.) That's right, I remember that ... (Brad: How about that.)

Kelly Slattery 15:44  

So you know, manifestation, I totally believe that it comes from a deep rooted place, and that what you focus on will most certainly reveal itself. But at the same time, if you if you don't focus on it for a moment, don't worry, like your path is there. The road is windy, the road is rough. I feel like there's a rhyme in there somewhere (Lesley: Yeah) that I should finish with ...

Lesley Logan 16:06  

Thank you for sharing that because I do, I do think a lot of people think it's so linear. I don't know why we think anything is linear, and nothing is ever done that way, like, (Lesley laughs) you know, but we anticipate that and so when we hit an obstacle, or we get distracted or something in life happens, and we have to take a pause from that. Thank you for sharing that, like, you know, don't worry, it's your the path is there. Because sometimes it picks up in a spot we didn't realize, you know, so. Okay. I want to talk about you both got involved, maybe for different reasons. And I would love to hear it in helping foster youth. And I want to hear like, what, what was that? Because I think some people we've had people on before talking about working with charities and thing like things like that. It's like, there's so many things you could be focusing on. Like Marisa said, "She wants to make an impact." There are so many problems in the world. How did you choose this? What what led you to that? And, you know, can you share more about that?

Kelly Slattery 17:03  

I've always had an obsession with this notion within America, which is family is everything and this obsession that there's a whole population of young kids, if family is everything, and I don't have it, where does that leave me? Right? (Lesley: Yeah) So I've always just kind of really focused on that. And when I first moved to America, I start tried to start a charity called Home Base. And it was you don't have to make a commitment to have children live in your home. But how about you just become a home base? How about at Christmas, on their birthday? They have somebody that they can connect with, somebody when they want to buy their first car? How do I go about doing that? So that was what home base was about. And in the process of trying to put this together? A friend of mine was on the board of Echoes of Hope, which is coincidentally one of the charities that we do support through our efforts at Barely Canadian, and said, "Why reinvent the wheel?A really good friend of mine has this nonprofit. Why don't you meet with her?" Her name is Stacy Robitaille, who I now call sissy, because she is like my sissy. And we first met, we just had this immediate connection as as you do, as we do, you know, with those people that are meant to be in our lives. So I started volunteering with foster youth. I'd always wanted to adopt a foster child. And coincidentally, I think what helped put that into place was meeting my husband on our very first date, learning that his mother was in foster, and learning that he also wanted to adopt a foster child. So that was a big deal for me, because as you get older, and you decide to focus on career, instead of personal life, you think, "Gosh, I've missed the opportunity to have a child. But I, I've always wanted to adopt and have a child, I hope I can meet a guy that is okay with me not being able to have my own child." Right? That's the big fear for women as you get older. And so to actually have that first date with him, and that was very important to him. And a goal of his as well in life was incredible. So cut to what I guess three years into our marriage, we started to begin the process of becoming a foster parent, which is a very long process, but a very worthy process. And like anything else, little steps, and suddenly you're there, you know, after a year's time, and of course we we are a foster adopt family, we have fostered a couple of other kids and adopted or adopting our son and we have adopted our daughter. So you know, the whole population of foster youth out there is important to us. We helped our kids and our help kids helped us, find our forever home because truly kids save created our family for us. But within barely ...

Brad Crowell 19:35  

Kidsave as the organization?

Kelly Slattery 19:37  

Yeah, Kidsave is how you can meet older kids to adopt. Because otherwise they're going to age out. And so yeah, it was just ...

Brad Crowell 19:46  

Can you talk a little bit more about this age out thing and just, you know, (Lesley: Yeah) what does that mean? I think, I think a lot of people ... like we (Kelly: I'm okay) I grew up hearing about adopting and then I sort of heard about fostering but didn't really I understand the concept of it. And I certainly never understood the ramifications of aging out.

Kelly Slattery 20:05  

Yeah. So if you don't find it forever family, by the time you hit 18 years old, even if you're in a foster home that you might have been domiciled for five years, but that family more often than not go, "Okay, you're 18. See you later." And they don't have ...

Brad Crowell 20:20  

Domiciled means actually living with family.

Kelly Slattery 20:23  

Living within that home, within that family. But by the time they're 18, it's like, "Okay, sorry, but we're not kind of covering this anymore." I think some people quite sadly, foster because it's an income for them, versus wanting to really help a child ... 

Brad Crowell 20:40  

So (Lesley: Yeah) while, so while the kids with the family that they're getting the families getting a check?

Kelly Slattery 20:45  

The family is. And by the way, it's it's a minuscule check, it's nothing that's going to be substantial. But if you are super low income, (Brad: mm-hmm) and, you know, maybe even disabled, sometimes, like, you know, it's extra income for them. And, (Brad: mm-hmm) and I've met people that were super low income and not necessarily physically capable, who are incredible foster parents, you know, (Brad: sure, sure) so it's not to say that that's always the case.

Brad Crowell 21:10  

Yeah, yeah, I don't want to paint a bad light, but that there is (Kelly: Yeah, not at all) there there is, you know, some ...

Lesley Logan 21:15  

But the way the system (Brad: room) works, when they turn 18, no matter, no matter, like, you know, unless the person that is with them is able to afford to keep taking care of them and has the space, they're going to age out because they're no (Kelly: Yeah) longer being supported by the system.

Brad Crowell 21:29  

Yeah, I guess that's, that's fair. I mean, it may simply be a matter of finances as well, maybe they cannot continue to afford to support them.

Kelly Slattery 21:37  

Well, that's the there you go, you know, there's a plethora of reasons. And so it's when you age out that the state does give the child some money, depending on the state is how much money they're going to give them. They do have healthcare till their, you know, 25, they do have, you know, a train ticket or bus pass or whatever. But think about, what is it maybe $1,000 that they get a month, you're 18 years old? Think about, you know, yes, our generation also, we, if you had parents, we felt very capable of leaving the house at that time, we also knew we had this amazing safety net behind us. These kids do not, (Lesley: Yeah) not at all. So so yeah, so we, we want to help kids, we want to encourage people to be open to learning about Kidssafe, which is you go in the weekends, you meet these kids, you play board games with them, make vision boards, get to know who they are. And you might even feel inspired and think I think I could be that child's parent, you know, and that's what those meetings are about. Kidsave actually has a Emmy winning documentary on A & E that we were actually featured in, but the process of adopting. And it's really, really interesting, some kids get adopted, some kids don't. But part of what we want to do at Barely Canadian is if you don't find your forever home with the family, it doesn't mean you can't create your own forever home. And so we want to help with that. Hence, our fosterpreneur program that we're developing. Here's how you can do it on your own. You know, you don't have to bank on other people, right, kind of coming back to that if you don't have the family to bank on, bank on yourself, and still always bank on yourself. (Lesley: Yeah)

Marisa Polvino 23:09  

Always think that yourself. (Lesley: Yeah, Marisa ...) I think what's interesting, just to add on that is, you know, these kids in foster care, they have a staff of people, you know, they have their casa, they have their social worker, they have their therapists, (Kelly: attorney) their attorneys, they have a whole staff, (Brad: Wow!) but they don't have a person, (Kelly: Right) like who's that person that's in their life, that is without economic gain. Right? Who's that person that's not there to get the paycheck to be there for that kid? And where's the community around that child or those groups of children that can give them the love, the self worth, the community, the skill set, so that when they do age out, they have a shot out there. And they are not then repurposing the foster care system because a lot of these kids that don't have that come out with substance abuse problems, they're teen mothers, those kids go back into the foster care system. And so it's a vicious cycle. So getting these kids like through this fosterpreneural program, giving them the skill set, and the self value, the self worth to actually follow a dream, see it through and create a life for themselves outside of a system is a real huge goal. And we think what we can do as just individuals want a couple of people providing this, this life for kids outside of a system to give them something so much more than living off of a system that's not really there to support them.

Kelly Slattery 24:39  

And to kind of piggyback on that, just that we're just learning ecommerce. We're just figuring this out, and it's new to us. So, I think there's value to that when teaching a young person, you know, gosh, I'm you know, how much older than you and I'm just learning this you're young with a fresh mind. You grew up with technology. So also kind of like I think adults show that vulnerability like we're just figuring this out too. And I think (Marisa: Yeah) it's a great way for anyways has been a great with for my kids to learn, you know, as Marisa knows them well. Just seeing how they've found growth and knowledge through this process.

Lesley Logan 25:11  

I think you're 100% correct there, because so many times I work with people, and they're like, "Well, who am I to teach? So and so I'm just started." And it's like, you just have to be one step ahead. And, (Lesley laughs) you know, like, you don't, you know, like, um, this one woman I listened to on a podcast, I can't I can't remember which episode it was... But she said, "If you want to learn the piano, you're not gonna hire Billy Joel to teach you." Right? Like, you're gonna hire someone who knows the key, like the first few keys, like, that's who's gonna teach you and then you'll, you know, like, have an either they'll grow and you grow with them? Or do you find the next one, but like, I think, I think that vulnerability is so great for kids to see and also see that like, not everyone knows everything. And the people doing it are often making big guesses. And so it kind of allows them, maybe it ditches imposter syndrome, or allows them to see possibility, I think that's really cool.

Kelly Slattery 26:03  

Yeah, and it's funny, you should say that too, because it's also fun to do things together. So even though what will be a little bit step ahead, when you have somebody doing it with you, it feels safer, it feels like you have that team, you have that support. And that's something I'm really enjoying, with Marisa wanting to get involved in the company. You know, it's, it's, it's fun to bounce something off somebody, and it's fun to have that support. And also even, you know, adults tend to be, parents tend to be accountability coaches. So that's the other thing that you kind of offer when you're when you're teaching a young person. So but yeah, we're, we're, we're excited. We're building this out, and we're pumped, and we can't wait to talk to you guys more about it as well, knowing that you also do business coaching, you (Lesley: Yeah) know, in a really, really unique way.

Brad Crowell 26:49  

Before we get into the fosterpreneur concept, which I think is really exciting. And I can't wait to hear more about the the adoption or the excitement of the customers looking at Barely Canadian. Do you think that the social aspect of the company as a whole and the story behind it are what are lighting people up? Or is it really like the sweaters are just that amazing? Or is it a combination of both?

Kelly Slattery 27:22  

I, okay, first of all, when people feel our product, they literally go, "Oh my God, this is so soft, relevant, soft and cozy, and the feeling of home." Right? Because we're all about finding forever home. So it's all about feeling at home. But I definitely think that our kind of unique proposition as it were, is that we are in fact, an authentic story. I mean, we we started this to teach the kids, we really are a foster adopt family. You know, coincidentally, Marisa is doing this documentary on foster care and learning so much about it. That she's she's feeling fired up. So, I think when we, I do think when we share the story of how we came to be, why we came to be which, if I might make mention, we're Barely Canadian, because I am always freezing this I kind of intimated off the top. But additionally, my husband was like you are, we just need to make you some summer mittens, summer sweaters for California summer, because (Brad laughs) you just cannot handle it. And that was that's our first product are these super soft sweaters and super soft mittens that Lesley was wearing. And she gave us this great line. She was like, "I've been smitten." You know and (Lesley, Marisa and Kelly laughs) "we're starting to use that. I love it." (Brad: That's funny.) But but I think all of those really authentic pieces make a difference that that is what makes us stand out. So in answer to your question, I think it is definitely those pieces folded in and presented in the package of real and heart directed, which is would you agree, Marissa?

Marisa Polvino 28:50  

Absolutely. Absolutely. I think you know, in talking about a crowded marketplace, like you know, there's a brand that continues to come up every time I'm not going to give them any kind of nod on this because it's all about Barely Canadian. But you know, there's the brands that come up and there's the cops. Like, well, is it this? Or does it fit like that? Or, (Brad: sure) you know, how much of it is sustainable? And there's, you know, all the things that come up and it's like we can, we are our brand. The it's super soft. It's very comfy. We're giving back to foster youth. We love it. You're gonna love it and it's for everybody. There's not just one demographic that's being targeted. Everybody wants to feel soft and cozy and warm and feel like family. (Lesley: Yeah) What the brand is all about.

Lesley Logan 29:35  

Your sweatshirts are unisexy. Correct? (Marisa: It's unisexy.) (Brad: Yeah, they are.) (Lesley and Brad laughs)

Marisa Polvino 29:40  

And luckily, it's okay for boys to wear rainbows today. (Lesley: Yeah.)

Brad Crowell 29:45  

So when, when I, when I first saw Barely Canadian, it was through I think an email or maybe it was a post by Stasia and I just clicked it and open it and I saw you know that you were I think I don't know if she was too talking about you or somehow I knew you were involved Kelly. And, and I just opened up your Instagram and I was looking at it. And I was like, "This is so cool," you know, and I was really connected to the colors of it. And I, you know, I saved it and I showed it to Lesley. And it wasn't for like another month that I actually looked at your website. And when I went to the website, I didn't actually know any of the story. And, and I, I started reading a little more, and I and I started to understand like, Oh, wow, it's, it says, it's almost as if the, the profit of it is was like the last thing. It wasn't driven by this idea of like, "I'm gonna start a business so I could go make money." Like it wasn't, it doesn't come across that way. And that was really interesting to me, as an entrepreneur who I've started, like, a lot of businesses to do exactly that. And and this was, was really a surprise. And then the more I started understanding, I thought what a cool example for, you know, some kids plus, you know, what a cool project to have with them. Because it made me then begin to wonder like, "Who built the website? Was it you or was it the kids?" Or like, "Who wrote the copy? Was it them?" Like, "Who picks the products? Was it them?" Obviously, they're in like the photos and they're trying the things on. I thought, "Man, this is a really interesting journey." And I think it's really amazing, you know, and when we got the products, I was like, "Okay, (Kelly laughs) alright, this is cool."

Kelly Slattery 31:27  

I love that observation, because I hadn't framed it that way before. But that is exactly how it happened. So I just love that. You're kind of helping us even understand what you're right. We kind of went backwards, right? We started with "Let's do this for the kids. We want to do something for the kids. Oh, right now, this is a business. How cool is that?" You know, and so no, I love that. I really appreciate that insight. You guys are very good at perspective, (Lesley laughs) marketing and cool things like the smittens. (Lesley: Yeah)

Marisa Polvino 31:59  

I think also like do the, you know, this is a new thing, as you're talking just about being being an entrepreneur. Right? And trying a lot of different businesses. I think a part of one is like, figuring out what is our competitive edge? We don't know. So it is, it's about trial and error, and getting products and maybe, you know, the rainbow on the back of this sweatshirt isn't big enough. So yesterday we were together. And how can we like augment, like turns into lemonade, right? It's not perfect, but let's make it, let's add to it. That just enhances kind of what our messaging is. Let's take it and evolve it and learn as we go. And we're like, "Oh, next time. We'll, we'll do it this way." But by the but then maybe the zippers won't be right. So then (Lesley: Well, so ...) figure out how to make the zippers right. And the whole thing is a good entrepreneur and building the business. It's like, shits gonna go wrong (Brad: Yeah) and have to pick up and roll roll with it and figure out how to make it right.

Brad Crowell 32:55  

And now you got a hundred sweaters that have the thing wrong. You're like, "Oh my God, what do we do with all these? We put the money in, we got to get rid of them somehow." (Marisa laughs) (Marisa: Yeah) Like, yeah, it's a journey.

Lesley Logan 33:03  

Yeah, I mean, we've we've gotten to the... what we do create product. And it's always, it's an interesting process, I'll say, but we around here like to say, "Perfect is Boring." And like all of our (Marisa laughs) all of our merch that says that people look at it weird because it's on backwards. And I was at the TSA (Lesley laughs) and I was like showing the guy my ID and he's like, looking at me and like, you never want the TSA guy to look at you funny. Like, that's not a good time. (Marisa laughs) And I was like, well, he goes, "What is your hat say?" And I was like, "Oh, it's like, perfect is boring, dude you had me scared." (Lesley laughs) It's like, "Oh my God, I'm getting pulled into a room." (Marisa: Yeah) Um, but but we say that be I say that because like, the rainbow might not be perfect. But like, is there a perfect rainbow? No, like, all the rainbows are different like, and I do think you know, what I love what you're talking about. I hope everyone who's listening is hearing this, they didn't actually have all of the plans in place. They're like, we love helping this group of people. We want to create something that helps this group of people. And we like soft things. So this is what we're gonna start with. And so like ... (Marisa laughs) I think ...

Kelly Slattery 34:06  

It's exactly it. (Kelly laughs) (Lesley: I think ...) (Marisa: And I'm always cold.)

Lesley Logan 34:09  

Yeah. You know, I've been wearing my spins around the house. And (Lesley laughs) I'm like, I'm like, "This is perfect because it's a Vegas house." It's either it's too cold, it's too cold. You have AC on or now it's, you know, 40 degrees outside. So, but I think people get stuck on why have to have it all figured out. I have to make sure I have all the things in place. And like, more now more than ever, I think it's actually just about getting started and, and putting the thing out there and hearing what the questions are because then you hear people go, well, you know, like, what's your, what's this is like this and then you can like, however you argue back or whatever you say back helps you identify another answer.

Kelly Slattery 34:48  

Yeah, no, it's so true. It's so true. And then it's funny because when we do introduce Kidsave and Echoes Of Hope to other organizations or companies like your incredible company, both of your companies and your multiple companies. It people are inspired and they want to get behind it, you guys made an actual substantial donation. You know, in December, it was really incredible. And so for us, that was our big we'd been alive for all of three months, we kicked off end of September, I had some serious health issues in October. And, and then, and then by December, we were able to donate to both, you know, nonprofits (Brad: Wow!) and but but but that was just one piece of it. But then you guys did this massive surprise of like, "What Kidsave? What oh Echos?" And giving these donations anyways, that that that those are the those the fields, that's what it's all about for us, you know. So you're right, when you're leading with, with with the heart, when you're leading with the true messaging purpose, and derivative of why this all began, that's when you'll always win. It's almost like when you're writing. Like in television, you have that log line. That log line is so hard to do, right? It's such a hard succinct thing to really pack everything into a sentence or two ...

Brad Crowell 36:03  

Yeah. As was I say for Tracy out there. (Lesley: I know ...) (Lesley laughs) I'm stealing, I'm stealing (Lesley: It's from Smartlace) from Smartlace here. (Lesley: for Tracy in Milwaukee) Explain to us what a logline is.

Kelly Slattery 36:13  

All right, let's talk to Tracy .... (Marisa: Let's talk Tracy Milwaukee. What do you want ...) Yeah. What's up Milwaukee? (Brad and Lesley laughs) As you're, as you're going along, it's always go back. What is that logline, you can't completely depart from that. And that's similar to if it's all about the heart, it's all about doing something that makes you feel like you're doing something right in this world. Stick with that, you know, always make certain you stay at the core of it. That's what is the goal because ...

Brad Crowell 36:36  

I think we would call our our listeners probably be more familiar with an elevator pitch where it's like, you know, (Marisa: Right) how do you explain it in one or two sentences?

Lesley Logan 36:46  

(Kelly: Right, right. Yeah and it's true.) I want it. So Marisa, you're working on a documentary? Is that how you got attracted to this particular cause? Or like, because I think, you know, you saw this and you're like, "I'm jumping on board with that." And I, and I want to point that out, because I do think sometimes people maybe don't know how to get become part of something. And so I want to kind of go into that, like, how did you go, "Okay, Kelly, I'm in." (Lesley laughs)

Marisa Polvino 37:15  

Um, well, one in terms of foster care in, in general, I've been watching Kelly and have gone to some of the fundraisers. And I've also been with her through this process of her adopting both of these kids. And it's really incredible, what, what it takes to become a foster parent. How, how much and how difficult if they don't make it easy. Right? And these kids are also coming from a place of trauma. And, and, in taking that in and taking that on is something really incredible. I think like I honor Kelly for creating such a beautiful warm home for both of these kids. And I think she's created that kind of a home for everybody that's in her life, right? She's has just the widest network and the most incredible group of friends and family and loved ones and created family that that surrounds her. So I've always been inspired by her. 

I mean Kelly changed my life and I know you (Marisa: Yeah, me too) know that. But you literally took me down a different path because of a text message from like, after like a year later, after we had met. Changed, literally, that's like a very defining moment ...

I kind believe that. (Kelly: I love connecting. I love it.) Yeah, she's, she's really a wonderful, beautiful, powerful spirit. And we've been for years wanting to work on something. And it has always been in the film side and the content side. (Lesley: Yeah) Let's find a project to do together. And we have some projects that we've been dancing around for a really long time. And so just this the opportunity for Barely Canadian, you know, just to be with her and to help her I mean, started off with like, "Hey, let me just help you. I want to come help sell... sell a sweatshirts. And I love these, I want to promote it." And, and I'd also been thinking like, "What, what do I want to do ... in two years, three years in the making?" And of like, "What do I want to do in addition to being a filmmaker? I want to do something. I don't know what it is. I have all these skill sets. What do I want to do with it?" And when this popped up, it just was something that felt right. It felt something like I'm just just soulfully, naturally, authentically felt like something I wanted to become a part of. And we had already had this friendship and a shared vision and love of have the similar similar things, similar people. So that was an easy thing. In terms of making a film about foster care is. It's an overall series about the systemic issues that are contributing to the mental health crisis of our (Lesley: Yeah) youth today. And so we've already done two films. One of them was, "Have you, have the education system?" And the other one was "The pharmaceutical drug industry and the overprescribing of drugs for our youth today." And then, because of what Kelly was doing in foster care, we were like the foster care system is such a broken system. And it's a view of like, "What are we doing to our kids? (Lesley: Yeah) And how can we tell a story through the voice of a child," because all of these films are through the voice of kids, to let them share their experience and give them a voice, empower them to take control of their destinies. And so I think it all like I think everything was very symbiotic because that's the right word. (Brad: Right) (Lesley: Yeah) Like, is it all synergistic in terms of how it all happened. 

Lesley Logan 40:47  

But I also just want to point out, in case someone, like, missed it. She'd been looking for something for a couple of years, she was like, "What (Marisa: Yeah) else am I doing?" And I think we get stuck on I don't know the answer, I need, like, need to like, and you I'm sure you weren't sitting around twiddling your thumbs, you were working, you're making these films and you but you had this question in your mind, "What am I going to do? What am I going to do?" And so then, when this came up, your body was like, "This, this is, this sounds really good. This feels really good." Oh, so it happens to be really soft. So, I think I thank you for sharing that.

Marisa Polvino 41:17  

So it was also... Can I just add like, it was also like it this is for everybody, cuz it gets like it can, you can start pulling your hair out. Like, "I want to do. I don't know what I want to do. I have to do something." But it was also like, "I want it to be a product, like a physical product that I can get behind and sell like a product that people are going to want, a product that people are going to need, a product that they don't even know that they need that they want." And when this happened, I was like, "This is so weird." Like, this is actually the product and I never viewed it as, "Oh, this is the product." It just felt like, "Oh, my God, light bulb. Hello." This is what you've been putting out to the universe, (Lesley: Yeah) energetically.

Lesley Logan 41:57  

Yeah. That's I mean, and that's just it goes back to what Kelly's saying earlier. It's like, the path will find you. Like it's okay, it's like you're not focused on it 24/7. It's going to find you. I have got chills. Ladies, you guys are... Your lines are friggin' amazing in powerhouses. And I, I have I cannot believe that Barely Canadian is only from September, I feel like I'm like this been around like, I'm in. (Lesley laughs)

Kelly Slattery 42:18  

I know, it's it's ... (Marisa: ... summer line) Yeah, we, um, we launched in September, by October, Nov... No by November, we had like a winter line. (Brad: Yeah) Let's get into the next season real quick. (Brad laughs) And it's been, it just kind of happened really quickly. It was so organic. It's really everybody's reaction to the product is really and it's not just the product. It's the, I daresay community, because we don't have that yet. We're so new, you guys have built this gorgeous community, you know, and you guys are so authentic with what you're doing. And I can't say we have a community yet, but we have, there's just an energy when people get engaged with us. (Lesley: Yeah) (Brad: Sure) And what we want to do, they want to also you know, participate and and so it's not, when you buy one of our products that that helps you know, a kid find a forever home. And that's a wonderful thing. But it's kind of, I don't know, where I don't know how or why. And this isn't speaking very much to what you're trying to kind of touch on because, you know, you're trying to help people understand how to get to where they need to go. Right? And so, so just kind of letting it be and whatever it's going to become, I feel what it's going to become, I just can't name it yet, right. But I do hope it's the kind of community that you guys have. It's just so flush and full of heart and authenticity.

Lesley Logan 43:35  

I think that you actually just explained what I'm trying to help people do. So you're literally being it till you see it meaning, you're just being you're you're the love, you're the drive, you're the, you're the feeling you want people to have around you, you're already doing that and tell we see where this is going. So actually think you're exactly what I want people to hear, what exactly what I want people to see because sometimes it's not as easy as acting like a CEO, you know, sometimes as easy as acting like, you know, you are the business owner. Sometimes it is a little bit more complex, a little convoluted, but you have the passion, the story and the love. And you're you're literally just being all of those things to see what comes next. What comes next for Barely Canadian? What comes next for all these charities and these kids? And so I thank you for (Lesley laughs) for sharing that because like I said what I hear I don't know, Brad, what do you think?

Brad Crowell 44:25  

Yeah. Well, and also I think we haven't touched on the fosterprenuer bit. So I think we're gonna have to have you back on to dive into that a little more, you know, down the road. But you know, I think well, I'm going to ask Lesley's question here. We ask every guest this, if you were to give our listeners one or two BE IT action items. BE IT being bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items that you have been doing or that you have tips for them when you were starting this pro... you know, Barely Canadian. What would you offer them?

Kelly Slattery 45:10  

For me, be bold, is just be you, you know. You can't, you can't please everybody all the time, let alone every time, let alone any time. So do the best you can and be you. I always like to reference that, as I always put the great American poets Nikki - "You do you," you know. You do you, I mean, the most kind of perhaps ill equipped person to give life advice at that time when this girl (Lesley laughs) was on Jersey shores. But nonetheless, that is the most succinct way I could think of, you know, to how to live your life. But I would also say, you know, my dad always said, "The harder you work, the luckier you get." And that's what you tend to find, you know, in Canada, where we like to align ourselves with our great hero - Terry Fox, and you just kind of put your head down and work. And when you look up, you're often surprised what you built, you know, but just focus on what you're doing, put your head down and do the work. And every time you look up, you're going to be shocked, like, "Wow, and now we're here." This whole working thing, this diligence, this, just focusing on the task at hand really works.

Lesley Logan 46:17  

That's so true.

Marisa Polvino 46:19  

Love that. I love your snooky. Something that I think about often is this quote, "Fear Eats the Soul." And so I think a lot about that, because it can be really scary to start something new, and put yourself out there. And so I always put fear in the back in my back pocket. So that would be one thing I would say is, "Don't let fear guide you." It's a false narrative. Show up. That's the first step. Just show up. Show up for yourself and follow your gut. And stay true to your vision. Like persistence of vision is there and allow yourself to fall down, make mistakes, learn from, learn from the mistakes and just keep showing up every single day.

Brad Crowell 47:05  

I already feels like that's been happening with Barely Canadian in such a good way because of the way it's taking shape. It's really exciting.

Lesley Logan 47:15  

Yeah, and that's so beautiful. Just I mean like that, just like put your, put your stuff at the market, go to the thing, like get in the room like (Lesley laughs) (Kelly: Yeah) sometimes the universe ...

Marisa Polvino 47:25  

It's the people that show up, that win. Truly most people don't show up.

Kelly Slattery 47:30  

Yeah, just like buying a scratch and win. (Lesley and Kelly laughs)

Lesley Logan 47:36  

Oh my gosh. Ladies, okay, real quick. Where can people find you? On Instagram, it's @barelycanadian?

Kelly Slattery 47:43  

So at @barelycanadian on Instagram. I'm at @kellyslattery but really I just care about at @barelycanadian and then barelycanadian.com is our website. And if you happen to spell it with a bear instead of a bear so b e a r versus b a r e l y. Don't worry, you'll still land with us. We still will catch you. We got you. (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 48:04  

Way to, way to grab the URLs. And Marisa, you're @marisapalvino at Instagram, on Instagram?

Marisa Polvino 48:10  

Yeah, in Instagram and at @straightupimpact.

Lesley Logan 48:14  

Okay, I'm with Brad we're having you back. We'll have to do the fosterpreneur and and just also here like what's going on because, um, y'all we are very much going to be involved with these women and what they're doing... I'm really, there's it's so many different passions and impacts I've wanted to make in this planet that you know, not always teaching Pilates can help. (Lesley laughs) So being involved in different ways and collaborating is huge and, and we'll share those things as they come up. But um, definitely take the, check out the links in the show notes. And check out Barely Canadian and grab yourself some smittens and a summer sweater and, and y'all until next time, Be It Till You See It.

Marisa Polvino 48:51  

Be It Till You See It. (Brad: Bye now.)

Kelly Slattery 48:53  

Be It Till You See It. Thank you.

Marisa Polvino 48:55  

Thank you so much. Bye.

Lesley Logan 48:58  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 49:31  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 49:42  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 49:46  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 49:55  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 50:07  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Is your ego holding you back? Is the illusion of safety keeping you in burnout? In today’s episode LL and Brad discuss how acknowledging, accepting, and creating an alternative action can transform your life in more ways than one. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe. 

In this episode you will learn about:

- How to overcome burnout 

- Pain, suffering, and ego 

- The BEING method 

- The three A’s: Acknowledge, Accept, Alternative Action 

Episode References/Links:

Profitable Pilates retreats: https://retreats.profitablepilates.com/lp-irl-retreat-waitlist

LL FREE WEBINAR: https://resources.profitablepilates.com/lp-ditching-busy

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:01  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co host in life, Brad and I are going to dig into the captivating convo I have with Lena Franklin in our last episode. If you haven't listened to that episode, that interview, feel free to pause this now and then travel back in time to listen to that one. Or listen (Brad: back in time) to this one first... Yeah, well, you know, it's it is sort of. It happened already. Or listen to this one and then go listen to that one. I think you have to listen that one anyways. But you know, you're already on this one. So do it backwards. It's all good. I, we are, y'all we're in the middle of the Full Body in 15. And it is so, so fun. It's it's just amazing to help people feel Pilates in their body in a really unique way. I think a lot of people just assume that Pilates is an ab exercise only or just for women or just for dancers or just for flexible people. And what's been really fun is watching super strong people, super athletic people, like actually realize that they're missing strength in awesome places and also people who are just trusting themselves to work out for the first time. So I'm having a good time.

Brad Crowell 1:52  

We're having a good time.

Lesley Logan 1:53  

We're having a good time. And that's an inside joke for Brad and I, if you didn't get that. Don't worry about it. (Brad laughs) Speaking of inside, we're literally days away from our business retreaters showing up at our house. 

Brad Crowell 2:09  

Yeah, Profitable Pilates. Our first retreat for Profitable Pilates. (Lesley: Yeah) And it happens to be here with us in Vegas.

Lesley Logan 2:17  

Yeah, yep, yep. So anyways, it sold out so fast. If you had never heard about it. (Lesley laughs) Well, you're not alone. It just happened really quickly. And we are so excited because we have people from all over the world showing up. And we have like four and a half days of workshops and self care, and photo shoots. And I'm just, I'm excited because also our teammates, our team members are coming in, two of them. So we actually get to work with our peeps.

Brad Crowell 2:44  

Yeah. (Lesley: in person) It's really exciting. It, it definitely was like hardly, I feel like we hardly announced it and it filled up so fast. And I'm going to tell you a secret.

Lesley Logan 3:00  

Oh. Do I know the secret?

Brad Crowell 3:02  

Yeah, you might. (Lesley: Okay) Well, here's the deal. We would love for you to come and dig into your business for five days and four nights... Four days and three nights? (Lesley: Yeah) Four days. (Lesley: If they arrive on a Wednesday.) They leave on Sunday. (Lesley: They leave on a Sunday.) Yeah. (Lesley: Yeah) Anyway, we would love for you to come join us and dig into your business. We are going to be running another one, later this year. (Lesley: Oh I did. We already talked about this.) Yeah. (Lesley: Yeah, I'm so excited.) And you can get on the waitlist by going to profitablepilates.com/retreats. But keep in mind, I think that we're going to open the doors, like the first week of March to get your deposits in for the next retreat. (Lesley: Well....) So mark your calendar now. That was the secret. The secret is that nobody knows this. But we're opening the doors.

Lesley Logan 3:53  

I didn't know that either. (Brad laughs) So, oh my goodness. All right, well get on the waitlist because the waitlist people will have first access to to sign up. So anyways. Alright, before we get into our recap with Lena, what is our audience question?

Brad Crowell 4:08  

Okay, this was a really, this was a really heartfelt question from someone who joined us in Agency Mini recently. And then also from some of our Agency members, where we coach people on their fitness businesses. And the question was, "How do you avoid burnout? Or what do you do, if you already are in burnout?"

Lesley Logan 4:35  

Yeah, so this is, I think this is a really important question. And I also do think that you may need to change this as you go through life because your needs are going to change. So what worked for you before might not work for you now? And it's just really important to ask yourself like, "How do I want to feel right now?" And then it's a little easier to work backwards and the other thing I would say is, if you're in burnout currently, I need you to actually, like you actually, they actually have to stop like, "Stop." You cannot even scale back, you have to do a hard stop, which is going to be scary and hard. But you're going to have to like, just call up all your peeps for the next 48 hours and say, "I'm so sorry, I'll be back on this date." Don't even like reschedule, nothing, it'd be really awesome if you could do this on a mass email, if you had a newsletter. But anyway, what I want you to do is find a way to quickly put the pause on everything. I need you to do things that actually make you feel good. Take a nap, right? Take a long bath, go to a spa. Like really, you need to just pour into yourself, eat all of your favorite foods, like take some time. And I need you then to look back and think about when was the last time you didn't feel like you were in burnout? Go all the way back. And then you actually have to figure out like, what were the red flags that you ignored? That is advice I got for my therapist regarding dating, and it helps with burnout as well. (Brad: Hmm) And then, and then you'll actually have those signs and you tell the people who are around you, the people who are near and dear to you. These are the red flags that I'm in burnout. (Brad: Hmm) And that way, you can start to spot them as they come up. Now you have to choose to ignore them or see them as a sign. But that you know, that's a different question that might require some actual therapy on that to figure out like, why you keep ignoring the red flags, when you see them. But that's what I would say to avoid to when you're in burnout, you do a hard stop, which is very scary and might even sound really privileged. You might be like, "Lesley, I need the money." And I'm going to tell you, you need to be alive. (Brad: Yeah) And burnout is like, I'm not being dramatic here. Burnout is real, it's stress and 99% of all illnesses, cancers or diseases are all from stress. So we need to put the pot. As far as ...

Brad Crowell 6:54  

Yeah, also, I mean, burnout, burnout is like a, you know, it's a precursor to a panic attack that can land you in the hospital. (Lesley: Right) You know, like, it's, this isn't just like, "Oh, I'm mentally drained." You know, so if, you know, you're, like, completely fried. Like, I think we were talking about this in our, in our last recap, (Lesley: Mm-hmm) you know, effectively, we're talking about overwhelm. (Lesley: Yeah) And with overwhelm, we were talking about how it's a, it's kind of a, it's a learned behavior, and we assume that like, we should be, we assume that we should be maintaining the consistency of like, you know, our current, like, effective. Like, I'm going to, I'm going to start, I'm going to start the whole thought back over, because I'm going down this weird road, when we kick it into fifth gear to get through the shit. You can't stay in fifth gear forever. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) Okay, that's like, it's that starts the burnout process, but the overwhelm processes when you're in fifth gear, and you're like, "I'm losing it, I'm not going to be able to manage all the things I just feel like, aahhh. And I've never had the chance to, like, sit down with myself and I barely get the breakfast." And you know, and, you know, the reality is we, it's a learned behavior, (Lesley: Yeah) we put ourselves back into this situa... situation, because the other side of overwhelm is busyness and busyness feels productive. Busyness feels like we're making progress and moving it forward, and we're doing the thing, whatever the thing is... (Lesley: Might not be able moving anything forward.) Right. And and, and, you know, we talk about this all the time with our coaching clients, it might be that you know, you're working in your business instead of working on your business. And what I mean by that is working in your business could be scheduling your clients and, you know, reorganizing your desk and like getting through your emails and all the things that you have to do anyway. (Lesley: Right) You're not necessarily moving your business (Lesley: Well...) forward, you know, working on it.

Lesley Logan 8:54  

All those things first, feel safe. (Brad: Yeah ...) And safety doesn't actually mean you won't burnout. In fact, they have done studies that your comfort zone actually gets smaller over time. So what what actually was in your comfort zone a year ago, because technology, things advance, your comfort zone actually gets smaller. So as far as how do you avoid the burnout? You have to have to be filling your cup first. (Brad: Yeah) If you're filling your cup first, you are not going to, to actually get to a place of bur... of a burnout where you have to do... a whole stop. You can do some little pauses or slow downs. You can reevaluate, reassess, correct and continue. But like avoiding, like the best way to avoid burnout is just make sure that like your priorities, your values, you (Brad: Yeah) are in your schedule first. So, I I feel for anyone who's in it, I've been there. Well it will happen because again, what leads you to bur... like, how you recover from burnout and stuff, that that can change over time is what your needs are. But if you are filling your cup first and you're constantly asking yourself, like, "How can I like make sure that like, my cup is full?" You'll, you'll do some a lot of adjusting along the way and you don't, burnout doesn't have to be part of your life. Like, just because other people are in burnout doesn't mean like you have to get there to be part of society. In fact, I think society better if we all could avoid it in the first place.

Brad Crowell 10:14  

I was just talking to someone who moved to Paris, and she said, "The French have a completely different perspective than Americans (Lesley: Yeah) about work." And she's like, "Nobody works on the weekends here." People people like ...

Lesley Logan 10:28  

You know it's actually, like, if you're like, emailing outside of work hours, it's a little weird.

Brad Crowell 10:33  

Right. Like, people clock out, and they're done for the day. And you know, you know, especially with COVID, and working from home and all the things like, I mean, I feel like I work 24/7 now, you know, and that's... (Lesley: It's so easy we can do it.) Yeah. And also, there's no break between, I was just listening to another pod talk about this, where, you know, before we at least had our commute, where we used to bitch and moan about our commute, but it was a breather between, you know, get up and flurry around in the morning. And then you have like 30 minutes, or whatever your (Lesley: Yeah) commute is to get to the office and you can think and you're generally alone, or whatever, and then you then you hit the office and then on the way home, you have this another pause. And we don't have that anymore, because our commute is, (Brad laughs) I got up, I went to the kitchen and then I went to my (Lesley: We do...) my desk.

Lesley Logan 11:18  

have a very long hallway. (Brad: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah) We have a long hallway. (Brad: It's like 15 steps.) Yeah. But what I would say is, (Brad laughs) if you are like, "Lesley, I hear you. I hear you, Brad. Like, okay, but like, I don't like my schedule doesn't allow me to be in it." Okay, profitablepilates.com/gemstones, watch it, (Brad: Yes) free webinar on how to have an ideal schedule.

Brad Crowell 11:34  

I was going exactly there. (Lesley: Yeah) If you want to know how, you know, like, because maybe you can't just like, I was thinking maybe you can replace yourself at some of the things that you're doing. You know, and you can... (Lesley: That's more advance ...) you can outsource, you can whatever. But if you don't have that luxury, then the best thing to do is go watch Lesley's free webinar on how do you prioritize yourself first in your own schedule, so that you can still get all the things done, and go to profitablepilates.com/gemstones. (Lesley: Yeah) So.

Lesley Logan 12:07  

Alright, I love the questions. You all can send your questions into the @be_it_pod on Instagram. We love them or your bold moments. We also love sharing those as well. So keep them coming. If you're like, "What the heck is Instagram?" You know, I'm sure somewhere in the shownotes (Brad laughs) as a contact thing, and you can just hit that or you can just put in your reviews (Brad: Yeah) on Apple and iTunes. Not only does it help me, but then I look at read your bold moment and I'll share with everybody.

Brad Crowell 12:30  

Yeah. All right. Now let's talk about Lena Franklin's (Lesley: She's amazing.) Lena... It was a great, great interview. (Lesley: Thank you) Lena Franklin is a Modern Medicine Woman. She's a Transpersonal Psychotherapist and a Transformational Speaker. She has a Bachelors in Psychology and a Masters in Social Work. Her passion for bringing ancient eastern practices and healing approaches to our clients led her to create the East Institute with her husband, guiding individuals to optimize their best human embodiment. Through meditation, Lena now teaches others how to optimize and transform their pain and suffering into their greatest strength.

Lesley Logan 13:11  

Yeah, she's just really cool and I love how life just like, set like, I mean, it's one thing she also said like everything has happening like in a divine timing for you. And her like just like who her parents were and how she was even raised. So she could be this person. Like, it's just really beautiful. So one thing I liked that she said was resistance points are really access points into transformation. (Brad: Hmm) The reason I like this is there's like cliche saying, like, "What you resist, persists." But actually we who do hear this say, "What you resist is an assistance for where you need to go." And in Pilates when I'm teaching people (Brad: Oh) the exercises you don't like are the ones you need.

Brad Crowell 13:54  

It was, it was Sharon won't the sculptor. Sharon... (Lesley: Oh, from The Artist's Way.) Yeah. And she she's doing The Artist's Way program...

Lesley Logan 14:04  

Yeah. We're studying with her. (Brad: Yeah. Gainsbourg.) So now... (Brad: Sharon Gainsbourg) Yeah. If you ever listened to an episode, I said, "I didn't actually read the book." We're reading the book now. So we just do things backwards. We started the art and started the pages and now we're in the book. Anyways, yeah, so what so she, so Lena said like resistant points are really access points into transformation. So think of them as a flashlight. What you're resisting is the assistance for what you need to be doing. In Pilates what you don't like your body needs. So what what Lena is saying is like, think of whatever your resistance like a little flashlight on, "Oop, this is where I'm supposed to go for to be transformed." So I just really enjoyed that because I do think we avoid the things we need. And it's so funny because as soon as you do them and you have that transformation, like why I was like... I ... I made fun of Pilates, and then I went I was like, "This is the best thing that ever happened to me." (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 14:59  

Well, this kind of goes hand in hand with another thing she said, where basically, pain is inevitable. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) But suffering is optional. (Lesley: Yeah) And I thought (Lesley: It's a choice) I thought, "wow, that's interesting." She said, "Everything is working in support of our evolution. It's not happening to you. It's happening for you." That's like a whole lot of heady stuff right there. But pain is a teaching tool. Pain is inevitable. But suffering is optional. And I thought that we were just talking about dwelling in the, in dwelling in the moment. I want to say again, last episode. (Lesley: great episode) Yeah. (Lesley and Brad laughs) And actually, but or it would have been the last recap episode, but you know, it, then if pain is inevitable and suffering is optional. Okay. So suffering is dwelling on the pain, but pain becomes the, it's the access point to transformation, like you're just talking about.

Lesley Logan 15:58  

Yeah. Um, so I just, I think, what I love is that she said that, and she is a woman who lost her mom at a very young age. (Brad: Yeah) Like an early adult. (Brad: Yeah, very unexpected.) Very unexpected. And I and I, the reason I bring that up is I think a lot of people, including myself, will say, "Everything's happening for you." And on the outside, (Brad: Sure) you'd be like, "Okay, Les easy for you to say." Well, yeah, cuz you don't might not know all the things I've been through. But specifically in this interview, you heard her say she lost her mom, very unexpectedly. And that loss is exactly what put her on the track that she's doing right now. (Brad: Yeah) And so if sure, if her mom had not passed, then the world might not have Lena, and what she's doing to help people. So anyways, whatever, you're resisting little flashlight, little flashlight. What did you love?

Brad Crowell 16:47  

Yeah, so I, I really loved she kind of, well, she talked to... for a little bit, but she said, "Our ego is actually the illusion of safety." Okay (Lesley: Hmm. I believe that. I get it. I get it) So, yeah. So you know, when we think we're in control, or we think we've got, you know, we've got a handle on things or whatever, you know, or maybe our ego is causing us to, you know, act irrationally or whatever. But so our ego is the illusion of safety. And I thought, first off, I thought, you know, it made me think about the book - Ego is the Enemy.

Lesley Logan 17:26  

Oh, I know, I need to reread that. It's been too long.

Brad Crowell 17:28  

And it made me remember the definition of ego is not the one that I like... when he defined ego as the enemy in the book. Or when he defined ego in the book, (sorry, Ego is the Enemy.) He basically said, "We think of ego as like, like bravado and arrogance," and like rrrrr, bang your chest kind of like, you know, like, kind of a thing. And he said, but the that is one extreme. The other extreme is being like completely diminutive and being like, like, "I'm not worthy," or looking down. (Lesley: Yes, yes) Like feeling like you're not valuable enough, or whatever. He said, "That is just as much ego. (Lesley: Mm-hmm) It's just the other extreme of what we imagine ego is. It's all ego." (Lesley: Yeah) And...

Lesley Logan 18:17  

...I mean, we'll also to... want to talk about like, this is the my my brain went here. People pleasing is a form of control.

Brad Crowell 18:24  

Yeah. And that is, that's also (Lesley: ego) ego. (Lesley: It's crazy.) Yeah.

Lesley Logan 18:28  

It's crazy. We think ego is egotistical, but really, it's just like, it's all the things that are actually keeping you from, like, being here on this planet. And then the real thing, it's, it's... everybody needs to read that book. Anyways...

Brad Crowell 18:42  

Yeah. And, and what I thought was really neat about what Lena said is, she said that we don't want to demonize the ego. We just want to soften it enough so that our true authentic self can shine through.

Lesley Logan 18:54  

I love that she said that because and a lot of the studies that I'm doing and in a lot of the groups that I'm in, I can hear people demonizing the ego and like, almost aspiring to be like in some, like, alien parallel universe. And I'm like, "No, I don't think that that's a light enlightenment either." (Lesley laughs) But I think it is it's, you know, because also, part of the ego does keep you safe in some ways. Like, (Brad: Yeah) you know, it's just that when we lean too much into it, and we are like riding on the control of it and using it, that's when it gets to the thing. So I do love it (Brad: Yeah) she soften it enough.

Brad Crowell 19:28  

Yeah. Yeah. Well, let's talk about the BE IT action items. (Lesley: Yes) So, (Lesley: You go first) what bold, executable intrinsic or targeted action items can we take away from your combo with Lena Franklin? Well, right off the gate, she said she had like a systematic approach, which I think that the conversation kind of took you away from concluding because she covered "BEING," B E I N G. (Lesley: Yeah) Right? (Lesley: Yeah) And we got through B E I and N, but we never actually heard about G. So...

Lesley Logan 19:58  

Oh (Brad laughs) ... I knew what the G was for growth.

Brad Crowell 20:03  

Maybe it was growth. Yeah. (Lesley: Yeah) Actually, you know what... it's what's naturally happening. And we're gonna we're gonna call it growth. I love that. (Lesley: I'm almost positive. Lena if I'm wrong, just hit us up.) Alright. Well, so B is being aware of your thoughts. E is understanding that enlightenment comes through awareness of your thoughts. And then we have I is igniting your intention, now that you're aware of your thoughts. And then finally they ... then they have N is what is naturally going to happen now that you've ignited that attention. And then lastly, yeah, growth. (Lesley: Yeah) So BEING. And I thought that was interesting, just to think through that path.

Lesley Logan 20:42  

Well, I mean, just even being aware of your thoughts, like if you just (Brad: Yeah) all start there, like because I understand, like, "Oh, my God, that's so many letters." If you just start with awareness of your thoughts, then you've already done E, by the way, cuz awareness is the thing. It's a domino effect because the more even like, when I started The Artist's Way, I just did the pages, just doing the pages, I became aware of like, "Wow, I keep having the same fear." (Brad: Hmm) And then you're like, "What's the natural thing? Why do I have this fear? What is this fear? (Brad: Right) Is this fear real?" Like you just... like it is a domino effect. So if you can just actually start with being aware of your thoughts, you are going to like, literally see growth 10 times over so fast.

Brad Crowell 21:24  

Yeah. And we were just talking about that last episode, too. We're talking about anger. People just like, feel angry, but they don't think, "Why am I angry?" (Lesley: Yeah) And this, I think, is like, you know, goes hand in hand.

Lesley Logan 21:37  

Maybe that's why we have so many different versions of being curious as BE IT action items from all of our guests. (Brad: Hmm) Like, the curiosity like, and I think like, even Joanna Vargas is one who really taught us as like, questions, questions, questions, question marks are the best thing ever. Like she's all the asking questions. (Brad: Right) And, you know, put a question mark on as many things as you can tomorrow, because you'll become aware of your thoughts.

Brad Crowell 21:58  

Yeah, well BEING, I thought that was really, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, clever. And it's a great, it's a great way to think about that. What was your biggest takeaway?

Lesley Logan 22:06  

Okay, come on. Three A's. (Brad: Yeah) Acknowledge, Accept, Alternative action. Boom! I mean, you know how much I am about taking action, messy action, everyone, because that's where clarity comes from. So acknowledge what is happening, like acknowledge that like, like, it's not like, where it's not like when you have when you soften the ego, you don't blow up at something. You know, you blow up with the dog. You're like, "Oh, my God," and then it's just like, "Okay. Oh, I did not actually like how I handled that." (Brad: Yeah) And I accept myself for handling because I'm a human being. 

Brad Crowell 22:37  

Yeah. She said, "Acknowledge the thoughts you don't want to feel. Acknowledge to the judgment. (Lesley: Yeah) Acknowledged the negative, negativity."

Lesley Logan 22:44  

Yeah. And then take an alternative action. And ...

Brad Crowell 22:47  

With well, then you have to accept. Right? So (Lesley: Oh so sorry) acknowledge ...

Lesley Logan 22:51  

... I thought I said that already. I accept ...

Brad Crowell 22:53  

You're accepting it with compassion. (Lesley: Yes) Yeah.

Lesley Logan 22:56  

Yeah. With compassion, space and grace, space and grace. You're going to be imperfect because remember, perfect is boring. Nobody wants to friends with perfect. I was on something last night, and we were talking about how like, "What am I doing yesterday? Was on someone else's podcast. I don't remember the day." Anyways. Oh, it's on my own podcast. I was interviewing people on my own podcast. (Brad laughs) Anyways, those episodes will come out soon. Whoo. And I was like, somebody brought up like, think about those perfect people. Like, do you want to be friends with them? And it's, we really, like accept that you're not perfect, because it's you, it's impossibly perfect. (Brad: Yeah) And like you could not and perfect is like in context. So like, accept that you're not perfect. That wasn't how you wanted to handle it. You're a human being space and grace. And then, and then we come up with an alternative action. So (Brad: Yeah) yelled at the dog didn't like that. So okay. (Brad: Yeah) Space and grace, she was barking nonstop. And she didn't stop. And then what do I want to do instead? And it's like, okay, kinder, softer voice, "Get the F over here, please." (Brad and Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 23:57  

Please. (Lesley: Please) Comma please. (Lesley: Comma please.)

Lesley Logan 24:00  

So anyways, I hope that I feel like that is like...It's simple.

Brad Crowell 24:04  

Acknowledge, accept and alternative action.

Lesley Logan 24:06  

It's simple. It's not easy. But it's it is a simple thing. And even if you start with acknowledge just like becoming aware, (Brad: Right) feeling good. All (Brad: Yeah) right. I'm Lesley Logan.

Brad Crowell 24:15  

And I'm Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 24:16  

This is so fun. Thank you for joining us. Thank you for listening to Lena Franklin's interview. Please tell us your takeaways. Post a screenshot, text it to a friend, you don't even know how to post a screenshot, just text it to a friend. You are how this podcast gets out there and we want what, we all want to hear what your takeaways are. We want to hear what your BE IT moments where, your bold moments and so we can catch you on the next episode.

Brad Crowell 24:37  

Bye for now.

Lesley Logan 24:39  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 25:12  

It's written, produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 25:23  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 25:28  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 25:37  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 25:49  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

How can pain become a power tool? How can the experiences that create resistance lead to transformation? Lena takes listeners through the BEING method and tips to becoming more mindful everyday. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• Knowing your passion, but waiting to know how to apply the passion
• Your souls purpose is not a coincidence
• Pain is a teaching tool, suffering is optional
• Processing the pain to transform yourself
• The BEING Method : Being aware of your thoughts & Enlightenment comes through awareness 
• Cultivating a more mindful present life with intentions
• The fear of power and owning your own power
• The Three A’s: Acknowledge, Accept, Alternative Action

Episode References/Links:

• Lena’s Website
• The East Institute
• Lena’s Instagram
• EAST Instagram

Guest Bio:

Lena Franklin is a Modern Medicine Woman, Transpersonal Psychotherapist, and Transformational Speaker, offering the ancient practices of meditation, energy medicine and psycho-spiritual healing in an accessible way for a modern lifestyle. Formally trained with a Bachelor of Science in Psychology and a Master of Science in Social Work, Lena is dedicated to guiding others on a journey of embodied purpose, presence and liberated wholeness.

Lena has taught transformational workshops and retreats all over the globe, guiding thousands to transform their suffering into strength by accessing their multi-dimensional existence. Raised in a hybrid Buddhist/Christian home, Lena was introduced to meditation as a young child and now integrates Eastern philosophy with Western neuroscience in her healing and teaching work.

Lena is the co-founder of The East Institute, a global organization that exists to support the healing and awakening of humanity and the planet through ancient embodied practices, plant medicines and cutting-edge science.

Lena is also the creator of The BEING Method ~ a systematic method for igniting your highest human potential through meditation and The Meditation Membership ~ a global community for awakening where members receive weekly meditations and transformational teachings transmitted by Lena.

Lena has been featured on Bravo, Lifetime, the cover of Yoga Magazine, and in The NY Times, Telegraph, World Travel Magazine and more. Visit her website to learn more about her practice and schedule of meditation journeys, transformative workshops, corporate and continuing education offerings: www.lenafranklin.com

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Hey, Be It listener, how are you? Ah, okay, I can not wait for you to hear this episode. So I am going to try not to ramble because I just want to get into it because Lena Franklin is just, she's amazing. Like, here, a woman who's just so in touch with her, her purpose on this planet. And there's something about being around people like that, that makes it so much easier to step into your own power and awesomeness. And we talk a lot about stepping into your power and the fear we can have there. And I just share this with you. Because here's why, I didn't grow up with people around me who were doing things that I wanted to be doing. I didn't, I didn't know a lot of people who were being their true selves and unapologetically being that I didn't know a lot of people who weren't being in their eat, like working with their ego. I didn't know a lot of entrepreneurs, I didn't that this didn't happen. I didn't see that. And so I can, I understand if you're someone who is walking through this life and just going, it must be so easy for them. Because it wasn't I don't, I don't know that I don't recognize that. And I say this to you because what I did is, was scary. It was really hard. I felt like an imposter all the time. But I constantly tried to seek out people who were doing or had done the things I wanted to be doing. I kept seeking out those relationships. And here's the thing, every single one of us has a gift. And so what I learned in doing that, and putting myself in rooms and putting myself in conversations, putting myself in places with people who had a quality or a skill or had done something I wished I had. I had some that they wanted, because we all have amazing gifts. And I say that to you because this this new year it can be anything you want it to be and if you're listening to this, and another year, this day can be anything you want it to be and I can't wait for you to listen to her be it tips because she'll explain how you can do that. Because I don't I know I say that people go, "yeah, right Leslie like today's a bad day for me." But like get to the end of this podcast cuz you're gonna freakin love that you can. You have every day to have an opportunity to step into the person you want to be actually multiple moments in each day. And Being It Till You See It is not like a light switch. "I'll just turn it on, and now we're it." And it's not that it's going to be easy, everyday. Some days, it's going to be easy to Be It Till You See It and other days. It's gonna be like "what in the world I don't know what I'm doing. I'm scared. I'm afraid I'm tired. I'm freakin exhausted. Hello, like I can't be it today." But it's a practice. Everything we're doing is a practice and it's about the reps. And, and I just challenge you to keep listening. And keep Being It Till You See It and take those tiny action steps each day because they add up they add up it's like a snowball effect. So I love you. I'm so grateful for you. Thank you for listening to this podcast. Thank you for sharing it. You you need to know that every single download you do is a massive impact on so many others because every single download you have actually helps other people find this podcast every time you share this podcast, whether you text it, tweet it, Instagram at all those things. It is how people's lives get changed and if we're all Being It Till we See It doesn't make it easier for you? Right? It does. So thank you for being you. And after this quick message, Lena Franklin...

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started. 

Alright Be It listener, what's up! Okay, so I'm so excited for today because I was listening to this amazing woman, when you hear voice, you're just gonna be like, "Okay, I could just listen to for hours." But I was listening to her while on my holiday vacation and she was talking with my dear friend Amber Shaw, we've had on the podcast so if you haven't listened to that when you go back. But I was I found myself talking to the two of you on the podcast and I wasn't not involved in the conversation. So I was like I just have to have her on so we ...(Lesley laughs) so I'm so excited to have you on here Lena that this is amazing. Can you please tell everyone who you are? What you're rocking like what you're doing in this world? Because it's beautiful.

Lena Franklin 4:56  

Mmhm, Thank you Lesley. I'm so grateful to be here. with you. So I'm Lena Franklin. I'm a modern medicine woman. I'm a transpersonal, psychotherapist, and transformational speaker. And my work is really all about sharing ancient eastern practices and ancient healing approaches, modalities here in the modern world in an accessible way for anybody to really optimize their human embodiment, to really be the best, most expansive versions of themselves. And I am honored to do this work. So I actually learned meditation originally, when I was a young child, my mom taught me meditation because I grew up in a Buddhist Christian home. So my whole life's journey has been this kind of interesting integration of East and West. 

Lesley Logan 5:51  

That okay, so first of all, that is an incredible, interesting childhood to grow up with, and I think (Lena: yea) it's so amazing how things set us up. But I, you know, I, as I mentioned earlier, before we start recording, but also our listeners have heard like, Brad and I go to Cambodia a lot. And there's something when you go to a place where they practice these eastern practices, like really practice them. You can be you can come and be stressed out. And then that plane lands, it's like, you you're going to get ground. They're grounding you. Like it's happening. And you can go with it, or you can fight it. But I remember when I landed there, we got in the, in the tuck, tuck, and I was like, "Babe, My soul is home". And he goes, we haven't even it's dark. It's 10pm. We haven't seen anything. And I was like, "No, I feel so at peace right now." And then you go and you like, we're so great when they teach us a few things on, on honoring the Buddha and the temples, but also, like, just sitting still, and it is so it's so it sounds so common sense to sit still. But like it's so hard for us here to do that. (Lena: uhhu) And so I think it is so cool that you grew up with both of those as parents and your life. Because I think you can relate to people so well, because I mean, if you I was raised Christian, but even if you're not like just being in that Western society with one pair, and then having the Eastern practices from the other, like, you can actually like translate it really well.

Lena Franklin 7:14  

Totally, totally. I mean, it was so interesting. My dad's Christian, he is Presbyterian. And it's... we need I feel these eastern practices now more than ever, because of the the state of the world. And just it kind of feels like we're living in a pressure cooker. But yeah, I grew up witnessing my mom sit at our ancestral altar and light incense and all the rituals. And you know, when something horrific or painful was going on in the world, she would make us as kids sit in silence and tune into the compassionate heart, the energy that flows through our heart in really sharing it with the world in this intentional way. So, you know, at the time, I thought it was kind of strange, obviously, weird, like "mom's being weird. And her monk robe again doing, doing her, all her little woowoo spiritual things." But it planted these incredible, just powerful seeds within me, that didn't blossom until much later in my life.

Lesley Logan 8:18  

And I want to talk about that. Because like, I can imagine as a child, you're like, but none of my friends moms do this. Like my friend's mom, something bad happens. And they're like, probably panicked, like, and you think that that's the normal thing to do? Like, Mom, why aren't you doing this? And so, did you? Did you grow up knowing you were going to go into teaching this? Or did you kind of like, wind your way and come back around?

Lena Franklin 8:42  

Yeah, that's a great question. So I did not know as a child that I was going to be teaching this, but my mom did. So she would say things like, you're meant to bring people back to my homeland. So my mom was from Vietnam. Okay. So that's, that's where my maternal lineage is from. And I'd be like, "okay, Mom," you know, I have no idea what you're talking about. But just, she had that mystical, kind of healer energy, but because we were in a very conventional Western, you know, society in town. It wasn't fully acknowledged it wasn't fully honored. And so I didn't really realize the gift she was sharing with me at the time. But, you know, as I continued to, to evolve on my own path, I realized, you know, people will just gravitate towards me naturally. Not school, when when friends would be having issues or problems or you needed some support emotionally. I was naturally the person they would gravitate towards. So eventually, I realized I was meant to help other humans. I just didn't know exactly what that looked like.

Lesley Logan 9:47  

Yeah. So how, because I, I mean, I don't know. I don't want to like insert my life, but I think of like, I had no idea what that heck I was gonna be. So (Lena: yeah) like, and so as your as you're doing this, like, how, how did you go from like, "Okay, people are coming to me." And then to where you are today, which is you teach people like you're a life coach and you teach all these practices like, what was that shift? And then? And was it easy for you? Like, you're like, Oh, this is natural for me like, of course I'm doing this or did you feel like you had to work towards it in any way?

Lena Franklin 10:23  

Yeah. So most of my childhood life, like, even through high school and into college was very focused on physicality. I was a high level athlete, I played soccer, I got a full ride to play soccer at the University of Georgia. So it's all about physicality, competition, sports. And what, what really changed the trajectory of my life, Lesley was, was really my own pain and suffering. My mom actually suddenly passed when I was in my first year of grad school. So actually, you know, at that point, I knew I was meant to help people. I was in grad school for social work. So I was getting my master's in social work. And she suddenly, you know, died of a stroke healthy, you know, didn't have any any health conditions, but just had a sudden stroke one day literally I had talked to her earlier that day, she had been to a friend's horse farm and had the most beautiful, joyful day. And she had a stroke that evening, and was in a coma for a few days until we could see her and then she transitioned. So it was really through my experience of grief and loss and pain, that I fully committed to my yoga and meditation practice. And that's, that's what sent me on this trajectory, I realized, you know, sitting like you said, sitting still, it was more healing than the traditional therapy I was in at the time, because I could see myself in a way I'd never seen myself before, I was so much more expansive than the pain I was experiencing was almost like I was having this existential experience through the pain I was experiencing. And my mom, in that moment of her transition, she became a spiritual teacher in soul form, outside of, you know, human form. And so it was our souls contract together, you know, she was she was meant to transition when she did. And that's what sent me on my journey of helping, you know, so many other humans on their path

Lesley Logan 12:31  

That is so powerful, because I think so many people like, of course, my instinct is to say, I'm so sorry, because that is a terrible, tragic thing to lose that someone who's such a person in your life, such as support, but then also for that to be the reason why you are, who you are and doing what you're doing. It's almost like, if that didn't happen, how would we get how would you get here, you know?

Lena Franklin 12:55  

Exactly. It's like, you know, what you see in the Buddhist temples, the mandalas, and all of the, like, everything is shifting in divine sequence. And that was what was meant to happen, like a domino effect to set me on this, this path of really living out my soul's purpose in this particular lifetime. And then now, it's no coincidence that a big part of my work is teaching people how to alchemize and transform their pain and suffering into their greatest strength because those resistance points are really access points into our deeper healing and transformation.

Lesley Logan 13:35  

Okay, thank you for bringing that up. Because I was like, "How do I get the listener at home? who's like, okay, Lesley, that's great. She was set up her mom totally trained her set her up for this, it was, but that didn't happen for me. Like, that's not how like mine was so..." Like, how, how do you like, what is the thing that you can use to get people that you use to help people see that this great pain is actually their greatest default resource? Or? (Leana: Yeah), yeah. Like what? I don't know. I don't know if you can answer that. But like, do you know what I mean, like, how do what how do you tell someone who's sitting there and pain and suffering like this is actually going to be the greatest thing that ever happened for you?

Lena Franklin 14:13  

You know, it's important for someone to get that message. But they're not actually going to see the fruits of their pain until the fog subsides a bit. So it's what I would say to those listening because as humans none of us are exempt from pain and suffering. I mean, our the pain is inevitable suffering is optional, because the suffering is us fighting with ourselves not wanting to feel this present moment experience. So in that, whatever you're experiencing right now, whatever challenge, painful situation, piece of suffering. The most important question that you can ask yourself is, "what is this pain trying to teach me"? And if we If we think about that, like that everything is working in support of our evolution, even the most dark, painful moments, then we can flip the perspective and transform our lens to receive life in this much more easeful way, because of we're here on this planet, and we're going to feel challenging moments, then why not transform them into our greatest lessons, because that's actually why we're all here. So it's, it's trusting something that is beyond you, it's trusting the, that you're supported, and that you're loved, despite the pain that you're going through. And it's also I think, this is a really important piece, it's like getting out of our own way, releasing that victimhood that you know, we all actually possess during our life at some point. And then when we go through our deep healing, we can transform it, but this is not happening to you, it's happening for you. And that universal truth is so key. In all of this. 

Lesley Logan 16:02  

You know, it is so key. And it's, I think it's like, I wish people I wish, like when you're young, and it's like I wish my parents had said, this is happening for you, you know, as opposed to not say anything at all, because having to unlearn that victim stuff. And some for some people, a victim mentality gets them attention. And so then they learn behaviors. Now, this is the thing that they're keeping. And so like, I think I would be the first one to say like, I have a really I have a hard time meditating, like, sitting still, (Lena: yep) like, yoga practices. Like, I finally found a teacher who talks the whole time I'm like, thank you so much. Like, please, my chatter is you got to talk over this. So. So I that's why I like found myself with breathwork. Because I really, when you talked about that expansiveness, you're like, I have felt that and like until you feel it, it's kind of like, what are they talking about these people? Right? But it is, it is a breath. That is a way I've been able to meditate. So how do how do you help the person who's like, "Okay, ladies, I'm hearing this. I've heard it many times. I'm ready to buy in. How do I sit? Still? How do I do this? Like, do you have tips for that?"

Lena Franklin 17:10  

Yeah, so okay, what I'll say is some, okay, we only use such a small part of our, percentage of our human brain, you know, like, 3% something very, very small. So much is happening within your consciousness within your body, beyond your human awareness. Every time you sit so many times, and I tell this to my meditation students all the time is a successful meditation is sitting still, from the first bell when the first bell rings, to when the last bell rings, it's a commitment to stillness, even if you're not perceiving anything, we'll say expansive happening. So for someone who's like, okay, that's, that's great, but like, I, when am I going to feel the benefit? It will come, you know, it's like, trusting this process that is deeper and more multi dimensional than what you can even perceive. So as humans, we know so little part of this is like just admitting, like we know so little. And going back to the basics is one of the most powerful things we can do. Connect to your breath, breathe deeply into your belly, sit still. Listen to your inner self, and cultivate the greatest relationship you'll ever have, which is the relationship you have with your soul. And I promise you, if you commit to that every day, you will begin to feel different, and you will begin to deepen and expand and transform yourself.

Lesley Logan 18:47  

Yeah, I mean, I, you are correct. And it's interesting. I was telling someone earlier today on another person's podcast asked me like, how did you even get into Pilates and I said, "It's the weirdest thing. I really didn't think I was gonna love it. I really thought this is gonna be this dumb thing." And I went, and in one moment, for the first time, even though I was moving, I wasn't sitting, I was doing the 100. But my brain and my body like had this like, it's like they saw each other for the first time and like, I felt parts of my body I never felt and I, I that that led me to be able to sit still from at least one belt to another, but it's the practice of it, right? It's like trusting like, Okay, I wasn't really good at this today. But I got down on the ground and that I do it again. And I do like it's your give. I giving my body confidence that I can do this. And so when I started doing breath work and mindfulness trainings, I was like, "Okay, I'm not going to be great. I'm gonna be a beginner at this." And I'm not, I'm not going to have the expanse of things because just like when I was beginner Pilates, I couldn't do the roll up. But you you do get there and it is this interesting thing because your brain is eventually going to once you get past like sitting still from bell to bell and going okay, so nothing crazy happened. I just sat here and like, nothing bad happened either the ceiling didn't fall in the world didn't float, I think that's another thing that people have to get used to is like, it's gonna be okay. (Lena: Yeah) If I just sit here for this amount of time. So you know, you you work with so many people and and you do some really awesome work and just helping people. I was listening to Amber's relationship with you and like what you've helped or do. And is there a framework or a system that you like to use with people? Is there something that you do that really helps people kind of step into their own power? Like, what is that something that you work with?

Lena Franklin 20:35  

I do, I would say, you know, one of my specialties and parts of my purpose really involve coaching and stepping people into the fullest expression of who they're meant to be. So in essence, like their daring, authentic power, and one of the portals into that is meditation, because that's, you know, that's a way that we intimately know or get to know ourselves. So there's a method that literally came through me one morning in meditation, and I have a, we have a meditation temple here at the house, and I was sitting there and you know, it's like, amazing, when you do open up and you become a clear channel, what, what moves through, because you actually have the space to hear it and to listen. So it's, um, it's called the Being Method. And it's a way that we can work with our in our life, our emotions, our thoughts, in order to kind of what I call like, clear the space and to embody this authentic power that exists has always existed within us, but maybe has been tamped down by different thoughts, belief systems, different dense energies. So kind of briefly, I can move through it, (Lesley: Yeah) that was the Being Method and it's really helpful, you can use it outside of traditional meditation. So the B of being is become aware of your thoughts, you know, becoming aware of what's moving through your mind, we can't hear what we're not aware of. So what are the default modes of thinking that you experience on a day to day basis, because you have to begin identifying that so I teach a lot of kind of conscious mindful journaling, as people are on unveiling deeper layers of awareness. So become aware of your thought process. What are you thinking in a pattern way. The E is Enlightenment begins at the moment of your awareness. So I like this one because we think enlightenment is something outside of ourselves, something that is so far away that only Jesus, Buddha, other Ascended Masters were able to experience. No, the moment that you become aware of something that's in your consciousness is a moment of enlightenment. So we can have many moments of enlightenment throughout our day. So when you're becoming aware, it's you. Yes, you are in an active process of transforming yourself and healing yourself and you become aware. So it's like to me that that one gives a lot of hope.

Lesley Logan 23:03  

Cool, because yeah, we know you said enlightenment, I'm like, "Okay, I know, I don't know, that's like Navanna, that's like your floating on clouds." You're like, no, actually, won't you just became aware, like, enlightened? I'm like, "oop, I'm in."

Lena Franklin 23:18  

Yeah, I mean, and we can enlighten ourselves all day long, because we can become aware all day long. So I think that's a really important distinction, for you know, for for anybody, you know, in this realm, who wants to really cultivate a more mindful present life. Yeah. So the I is to ignite intention, you know, being so committed to what you want to call into your life, how you want to live, how you want to feel, and committing to that every day through thoughts and action. So what is your intention? What are you going to ignite in your life, for me this year is all about expansion and expansion, unapologetically in all ways. So my thoughts, my words, my actions are going to align with that intention. So being getting very clear, and of course, our intention shifts over time, you know, one month or one year, some intention may serve us but giving ourselves permission to allow that intention to, to evolve as we evolve. So, the end is all about non attachment, which is, you know, is actually a very traditional Buddhist psychology tenant. So and it can be one of the most challenging steps because when we desire something, we have an attachment to the outcome. But as much as you can, when you set your intention, and you commit to align to action, if you can release, you know, align with the energy of release, releasing that intention into the universe, to unfold in its own timeline, than that is key to creating the inner and outer life that you deeply desire. So that non attachment piece because your Higher Self operates from non attachment, it's your ego that operates from attachment.

Lesley Logan 25:08  

So that makes me think of just really quick side note, we had a guest, her name is Hazel, and she talked about miracle goals. And like, like not just going, oh, I want to have a house. She's like, I want to have a pimp mansion. I want movies and music videos, a film, I want to have big parties, right? She had no money, like, none. And then she's like, and but she's like, I'm gonna have this, I believe it. I have that intention. And then she like, did the first little tiny step. Right. And then nine months later, she's freaking in this mansion there. Yeah. But like, I when you say that, like I because I'm in a process of like a really big goal. And I'm like, I am really that's one I struggle with. Because it's like, I have to take the action every day. And so like not letting the action taking get attached to the you know what I mean? Like, it's like, because you got to do the things that some...you know ...(Lesley laughs) So that's a challenge.

Lena Franklin 26:05  

It is a challenge. Yeah. And so that's why it's a practice you you work with it every day, you set the intention, you make the aligned action. And then I love and this is a very kind of shamanic practice, but literally breathing, using your hands out from your mouth, from your body, and really aligning so deeply with that non attachment piece, that release piece, it actually creates a swifter result. It feels counterintuitive, but it creates a swifter result.

Lesley Logan 26:34  

I love that. I'm doing. Yeah, I'm borrowing that. Thank you so much ...(Lesley laughs)

Lena Franklin 26:38  

You're welcome. And then the last step is, is just what naturally happens, growth naturally happens when you practice the steps before in the Being Method. Your true nature is expansive evolution, your true nature is power, its success, its abundance. We're simply getting out of our own way, by working with our thoughts and reprogramming what's not in alignment with what we deeply desire. So the Being Method to me is, is such an accessible way to do some of this work.

Lesley Logan 27:13  

Okay, this is beautiful. I mean, I couldn't think of like it, that's a great way to be until you see it, because it's like, become aware of your thoughts. Yes, enlightenment, which have awareness, and then, and then you keep going through it. And I just What I also like about it, thank you for making remind people to practice because I do think that everything really is, isn't it? And we get hung up on, I didn't do it right. Today. I didn't do it. Oh, that's not working. And it's like, no, actually, that's part of practice, like, you're gonna stumble, you're gonna make mistakes, you can make tweaks and you're going to realize, "Oh, I'm totally attached today, I'm really attached. And now I'm aware of that thought." And, you know, so I think this is really helpful, because I do think you said fullest expression of ourselves. And I, I find that a lot of people struggle with, with either trusting that that's a possibility for them or being comfortable with that.

Lena Franklin 28:10  

Yes, yeah, I believe that, you know, one of the things that we're most fearful of is our power. It's really our power. And that's, that's where we carry so much resistance is like in that metamorphosis expansion, because all of our, all of those old, outdated belief systems get triggered, you know, "who am I to fill in the blank". And that's where I think we can't practice these things without compassion, self compassion, because we are imperfectly perfect humans, we're gonna falter, we're gonna make mistakes, we're gonna have heavy days. But this if we treat our whole life, like as its own living meditation, that our whole life is a practice, I think we can have more grace with ourselves. But this, you know, it's not, it's not easy. These practices may be simple, like, some of the concepts are simple, but they're not always easy to implement.

Lesley Logan 29:07  

Isn't that the truth simple is rarely easy. I, I'm so grateful we're having this conversation. Because it's like my first like, my second day back in my office, and I. And, you know, we're doing a big scary thing tomorrow, like I'm, we're, I've been wanting to expand on one of our companies big time, and I had to get away of like, the attention of when that was going to happen, because like, I wasn't seeing the growth that I needed to see. And so I was like, trying to like, control that growth. And I was finally like, okay, we're just going to pick a date. Where we're going to bring on these new teachers into the program because I do believe that if everyone has a Pilates practice, even a 15 minute one, they get connected to themselves. They connect to themselves and connect more to others, right? And they're practicing doing hard things through movement. So if you can't do it that day, how you talk to yourself on the mat is information for you. If you can't do it, but you pick something else, you just told yourself, I can do hard things I can find another way I can do this stuff. And so we're constantly reminding them. But I needed to have other people, other voices, because not everyone can hear mine. Not everyone's gonna understand the words that I use versus someone else's. And I've been scared to death because I'm like, of course, there's that ego. But what if no one likes him? What if people don't like that? What if this and this all this stuff. And I'm like, okay, hold on. We were feeling so good about this yesterday. You know, and so it's like, knowing that, you know, it's, it's not, it's not like when you get that enlightenment on that one Awareness Day, it's not the end, it's like, tomorrow's a new day. And there's a new thought later on and, and just being kind to yourself, and I love that you talk about grace, it's like, it's really not easy to work on this, but it gets easier, the more you do it.

Lena Franklin 30:53  

Totally, totally, it's almost like, like the client I had right before I jumped on with you. We've talked about this being her spiritual training, you know, like, training. Whether you're training your mind, your soul, your body, you're going to go through resistance, you're going to have sore muscles, you're going to feel creaky sometimes. But it's pushing through that resistance in order to discover a power that maybe you haven't tapped into yet. That's why I think I love what you do, because it's, it's all integrated. This mind, body, soul existence, whatever the access point is, it's all very, you know, can be a lesson that we take in every domain of our life.

Lesley Logan 31:37  

So I want to thank you, I, and I think it's like, you know, whatever gets you in, like, you start to get on the journey, right? So I want to go back to the afraid of our power. Because I do think like a lot of people here like often, like, because the reason I named this Be It Till You See It is because people ask me all the time, like, "how are you so confident?" I'm like, I'm freakin scared. I'm scared to death. I'm scared. People aren't gonna like me. I'm like, literally afraid of what people are gonna say. So I just Be It. I'm like, "well, if I wasn't scared, if I didn't care what people thought what would I do"? But I, I think a lot of people nod and go, yes. And then there's that fear. A lot of people don't talk about but that fear of the power of like, what they're capable of? And? And is that that because of the learn behaviors as a child? Or is it that we just haven't seen a lot of good people step into there? Like, what, what is that? Why are we so afraid of that?

Lena Franklin 32:29  

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... so it's a big piece of it, I would say the predominant piece is the ego, the individual ego, but also the collective ego, because we, the ego thrives on fear, and are the systems and you know, so much in society is thrives on fear. And a lot of the well meaning, you know, not always but but generally well meaning parents that we've had, they try to teach us things, but a lot of the lessons a lot of the belief systems are based in fear, you know, and some rightly so to try to keep us safe. But when we then are on this path will say, you know, spiritual growth or personal development, trying to be the fullest expression of who we're meant to be. Those outdated, I call them viral systems that we've been programmed with get activated, because our ego is the one that continues to keep us small to keep us in the, what I call the illusion of safety, not actual safety. And so inevitably, in order to embody your, your authentic power, we have to be willing to do the shadow work of unpacking, what are the belief systems that are still entrenched in my fear based ego? But I think a lot of it is conditioned, is programmed. (Lesley: Yeah) Throughout our life. 

Lesley Logan 33:58  

Yeah. No, it's your so correct. Because I, I had an accountability coach from a program I did. And I was telling them what I was worried about. It's like, three years ago, I just started the company. And I was like, "well, I'm so afraid, because like, if my pl... my platform gets really big, then my friends who own their platform when they get mad at me, because I'm not trying to take their people." And she's like, and I heard myself say it right. I said it out loud. Yeah. Which is always interesting. And then she's like, "you have such a fear of success". And I was like, who would have a fear of success? Like, right, that sounds so dumb, but like it as you say, like a fear of our own power, it that's it. Right, like, because why? You know, like, for whatever reason I was I had this belief that I like I bragged, or I did better than other people wouldn't be able to do but who knows what that came from. But as you say that I'm thinking like, how interesting it kind of correlates. It's like, if you haven't seen it, if you haven't seen that around you or if you if for whatever reason you were told, like "hey, don't you'll hurt people's feelings. If you talk about the good things that you're doing." You know, that's bragging. Like, we, we do get that and then the ego is keeping us safe. Because it's like, well, don't do that cuz you're gonna get hurt, like you're going to hurt someone like all that stuff. And it's so interesting because we don't even know it until like we're going through life. And then it gets it causes issues, it causes friction, it causes us frustration in us and, and so it's just it's so fascinating, but I'm just going to this thing and I'm like, oh my god, it's such a, like, as I say, who have a fear of their own power. I'm like, Well, I have such as fear of success that I have to call it all that like, "oop, this is my fear of success talking". 

Lena Franklin 35:31  

Totaly, and I know it's so interesting, because our, our initial response is like, who would be afraid of that? Like, who would be afraid of success or expansion or power or whatever. But when you really unpack it, it's like, oh, yeah, that's like a deep part of our core, you know, growth area is owning is owning our true power. Because true authentic power has nothing to prove. You know, and I'm sure you've, you've because you've interviewed so many amazing people. It's like when you're in the midst of that, of someone's presence, that that embodies that, there's like this lack of striving or just lack of pushing, it's like, they just are because they know their worth, and they love themselves. Deeply.

Lesley Logan 36:14  

Yeah, it's your that is so true. Like I would, I remember in my, like, major hustle days, not the fun hustle, not the like hustle that kind of has to like, come like you have to do a little bit of work. But like in the striving, like, I just got to push this boulder up a mountain, I would look at some of these people that I like, admired so much. I'm like, they just look like this. They just make it look like they're at ease. Like they are like, like, so chill. And it's. And it's, I thought maybe it comes with time or practice. But I the more I dive into this and like listening to you, it's like, no, they just start getting that ego out of the way more often than not ...(Lesley laughs)

Lena Franklin 36:51  

Corect, yeah, exactly. Exactly. It's like, okay, we don't want to demonize the ego, we just want to soften it enough. So our true authentic self empower can shine through.

Lesley Logan 37:02  

Oh, my gosh, girl, I could talk. I feel like I could talk for hours. I'm like, how do we just.(Lena: I agree) Like, when do I get, how do I get to work with you more? Okay, so where do you like to hang out? How do people get to work with you? 

Lena Franklin 37:14  

Okay, so you can check out more of my work on my website, lenafranklin.com l e n a franklin.com And also, my husband and I just launched the East Institute, which is a learning institute that embodies ancient healing modalities. And we support people and work with people through the East Institute as well. And that's the EastInstitute.com and (Lesley: oh that's so cool). Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, um, it's been amazing. It's a global organization, that really, we think of ourselves as a bridge between East and West, and really bringing ancient practices to the West in a really accessible way. So check it out.

Lesley Logan 37:58  

Oh my gosh, I'm going to also anytime I hear someone works with her husband, I'm like, Oh, hi, me, too. (Lesley laughs)

Lena Franklin 38:04  

Yeah, I love that we have that parallel. Because it's, yeah, anyhow, that's a whole another conversation. (Lena laughs)

Lesley Logan 38:09  

Yeah, yeah well, someday we can go. This is how you work with your husband.

Lena Franklin 38:14  

This is how you work with your husband and survive. Yeah.

Lesley Logan 38:19  

Well, amazing. Everyone, check out Lena Franklin on Instagram and the East Institute. Before I let you go. I mean, you've given us so many great tips that Being I'm gonna like, put on my wall. But any other bold, executable intrinsic or targeted tips that people can take away and take some action on in their life from this conversation.

Lena Franklin 38:41  

Yeah, there's a call like a mindset mindfulness hack that I use every day throughout the day. And it has been one of the tools that has been so accessible and transformative for my own life, my own growth, but also for my clients and students. So it's called the three A's and it's, it's a way for you to reprogram your thoughts and align more deeply with what you truly desire. I mean I'll just run through it real quick. So people have it. But the first the first A is to acknowledge. Acknowledge the thought you don't want to feel, acknowledge the judgment, acknowledge the negativity. So again, with compassion. The second A is to accept you're just having this thought because you're human. You know, this is a part of your human humaneness. We all have thoughts we're not proud of that we don't want to think or we don't want to own. So this is like the action piece of you know, shifting into your heart and just acknowledging that's a part of your humaneness. And then the third A is the transformative piece piece and that's alternative action, what are you going to do differently? So it could be implementing a mantra, a thought that you want to feel that you want to embody. It could be changing your habit, you know, little micro shift every day to shift a habit. It could be grounding yourself in the moment to shift from that hyper mental energy into your body, that that alternative action piece is the transformative piece of change and transformation. So the three A's, it's like how I work with my own mind on a day to day basis. And it's really, it's really helpful, very powerful,

Lesley Logan 40:19  

So powerful. I like envision myself just going through those steps in that alternative action. It's like, that's the best part because it's like, you can actually, like, make the decision to change in the moment. (Lena: Right, exactly) That's so empowering. Thank you. You're amazing, beautiful, I hope to we have to figure out ways to run into each other I'm going to definitely become your new best friend ...(Lesley laughs)

Lena Franklin 40:45  

On this day, let's do it.

Lesley Logan 40:47  

Wonderful. Well, the listener thank you so much for listening to this. How are you use these tips in your life? Do me a huge favor. Screenshot this tag, Lena Franklin, tag the Be It pod and let us know. And and you know, what do us a favor send the link to this pod to a friend because I I If this changed for you and something in your head. It's going to change for someone else. And if we as a collective even just actually understand being aware of the first part being aware, we can like really change the world there. Thank you so much for being here, everyone. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day! Be it till You See It as a production of As The Crows Fly Media.

Brad Crowell 41:54  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 42:05  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 42:09  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 42:18  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Perdoso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 42:30  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

What has your body been trying to tell you? Wisdom from Bree Gordon inspires LL and Brad to discuss trauma informed care, what your body holds onto, and how to deal with disappointment. 

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe. 

In this episode you will learn about:

• Recognizing and dealing with discouragement 
• The expectation hangover
• Becoming trauma informed 
• How movement releases trauma 
• What’s staying with you? 
• Filling your cup first, so you can show up for others
• 
  

Episode References/Links:

• Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle
• Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself from Your Past, Change Your Present and Get What You Really Want

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• OPC Flashcards are on our site

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Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:01  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Hello, welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap, where my co host in life, Brad and I are going into dig to the beautiful convo I have ... (Brad: beautiful) I have with Bree Gordon in our last episode. It was really pretty. She's amazing. If you haven't yet listened to that interview, feel free to pause this now. Go back and listen to that one and then come back and join us. (Brad: Do it.) Alright, um, I'm so grateful for like random connections, Bree is someone I, we are in a group together and I don't participate in the group very much. (Brad laughs) And that's not because a group isn't amazing, it's just, there's only so much time in the day and I give myself full permission to not engage. And but I did reach out and say, "Hey, I would love to share my podcast." And she's like, "Oh, I have a podcast." And I never would have met her and she is just kicking butt. Just being herself, being it till she sees it. And she had like a pandemic baby and all these things. Anyways, I (Brad: Yeah) like, what the reason I'm sharing this is y'all, you never know who you're going to meet when you just say ... raise your hand, "Hi, I could use some help here." And she and I had the most amazing conversation probably when the best conversations I've ever had on a podcast ever, on her podcast... (Brad: Her pod. Sure.) Yeah, The Mindful Mentor. (Brad: Yeah) Please listen to it. It is not, you also have to listen to mine. I mean, it's amazing that you can listen to other people's. But I'm just so grateful that I get to know this person and who she is. So, I can't wait to dag, dig in.

Brad Crowell 2:15  

Well, I was, I was shocked when she said she was in her early 30s. Because the amount of well like wisdom that she was speaking didn't, I felt like she was, you know, far, far (Brad laughs) older (Lesley: This is not ...) and has a lot more life experience in that.

Lesley Logan 2:34  

This is not her first time here. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 2:36  

Well, I, also, we found out at the end that she was a radio host and I was like, "Oh, I get it now." (Lesley: Yeah, yeah) Cuz like she's just so polished on on the mic. And it was like and, and also she knows what she's talking about. So combine those together. I was like, (Lesley: I know) "Tell me more."

Lesley Logan 2:51  

I know she I don't think she said like one time, "I need to take a journalist class." Where they like (Brad and Lesley: um, um, like, like um) Okay, anyways, (Brad laughs) here's the deal, y'all, Brad and I are super stoked, because in three days, we are doing our first and very necessary, very planned out, very much like this is the time, Full Body in 15. And when I say "we" I mean, actually, we, Brad is totally going to do this class because I created... Look, here's the deal even listen to the ads and you're gonna hear more. I need you at this event. If you have ever thought about doing Pilates, if you've ever thought you're not good enough for Pilates, if you've ever thought. "I just don't understand it," if you are like trying to get it, if you are just even curious on how to spell it. I want you at this program. It starts on the 20th. We are going to kick off, there are replays. Zero excuses, I don't want to hear them. I'm going to teach you a 15 minute workout. That's your full body, you're going to strengthen and get stretch between aka mobility, aka injury prevention. (Brad: Yeah, and feeling better.) And feeling better. I'm also going to teach you how to teach yourself the exercises. I know, I know I'm giving it away. Because the reality is, is I want you to have this particular cross training in your life. It is going to make everything you already do better. (Brad: Yeah) Which means "doing life better," which is what we're all about. It is a week long program because we're gonna meet up together three times live. And yes, there are replays and by the end of the week, you will have a 15 minute workout that you can confidently do (Brad: Yeah) on your own wherever you are. Before and after your favorite workout or on the days when all you have is 15 minutes. So I'm excited ...

Brad Crowell 4:31  

For me this is really cool because I'm like, I'm the guy who asks a hundred questions before actually doing a move. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) Like with in yoga, befo... the reason that I was willing to get like dive headfirst into yoga is because I didn't dive headfirst into yoga. (Brad laughs) I took a class with a 75 year old like "Yogi lady" who was not doing any of the fancy stuff and all I did the whole time was ask her a hundred questions about, "How do you do triangle? And what are muscles should I be using and all that kind of stuff." If you are that kind of a person like me, then this Full Body in 15 is going to be perfect for you. Because we're going to break down the exercises, so that you can understand why you're doing what when, where all the things, how they connect together, what muscles you're supposed to be doing, so that you're not actually just straight up hurting yourself. Like right now, I'm actually taking an intro to barbell class here in Vegas, you know, at a local studio. And it's important because especially with weights, like, you could really hurt yourself. And so it's 100% necessary to take a class like that. But I feel like we skip that stage when we're jumping into (Lesley: Yeah) other modalities. And you know, you can totally hurt yourself doing anything. So this is a great place to get started.

Lesley Logan 5:46  

Well, and also we tend to think that intro or beginner means easy. (Brad: Oh, yeah, not so much.) It's, here's the thing, if you're doing it, right, Pilates is always going to be a little challenging, and also going to meet you where you are. And so yes, this is a class for a newbie. But it doesn't mean it's easy. It's actually going to literally change the form of your running. It's going to make your weight training better. (Brad: Yeah) For all of you who are doing deadlifts and not reaching through your heels because what and you have to like buy special shoes or do a certain thing. I don't even have to think about it. I don't even. I take intro every other week. (Lesley laughs) I like to, I like to moonlight in my intro classes and I, but I promise you like the reason I can, on, without having deadlifted in... Since before the pandemic, I deadlift of more than my body weight because Pilates helps me work from my core out first. And so I want you at this. So go to onlinepilatesclasses.com/fullbodyin15. That is Full Body i n 1 5. Okay, what is our audience question, my love?

Brad Crowell 6:57  

Okay, we got a great question from a very, very, very sweet woman. And she asked, "What do you do when you're discouraged?"

Lesley Logan 7:09  

Yeah, and I just... how brave to ask that question because you wouldn't ask that question unless you were feeling that way. (Brad: Right) And I just think like the vulnerability that requires that question is to be honored. And I wish we all lived our lives that way. And so first of all, I'm just so grateful for this question. And second of all, first of all, I don't know, second of all, first, like, can you just pat yourself on the back for I understand that you are in that spot? (Brad: Yeah) So few people actually are aware of how they're feeling. (Brad: Yeah) Like at all and, and also like, they try to excuse the thing away, and so instead of feeling discouraged, you're like, "Well, I'm just tired. Well, I'm just overworked."

Brad Crowell 7:50  

Well, I think they're feeling it, but they're not like, they're not like taking a step back and being like, "Oh, I'm angry now. Why am I angry?" (Lesley: Yeah) They're just like, "angry." (Lesley: Yeah) The technical term.

Lesley Logan 8:01  

Yeah. And I I feel like, I feel like what how you handle discouragement? Is that a word? Okay, great. (Brad: Hit the word.) (Brad and Lesley laughs) I think that, A it takes time, and like, screwing up how you feel when you're discouraged, like, I'm sure when you're younger, and you're discouraged, you like throw things at a wall, you know, you get upset. And as you get older, you understand that you can't just like scream in the in the ethers. But if you can do it, I think you'll feel better. (Lesley laughs) I think it's like, important to let the feelings out. And then the other thing is like, I think you have to take a step back, like a 30,000 foot view. (Brad: hmm) Why are you doing what you're doing? Because if you can go back to the "why" then the discouragement is more of an obstacle than it is like a 50 pound weight, like pushing you down a hill. (Brad: Right) You know what I mean? Like, I think if you, if you can go back to why.

Brad Crowell 9:01  

That's, that's really interesting to think about it as like, the discouragement could be something that you can navigate around instead of something you have to carry with you.

Lesley Logan 9:10  

Yeah. Wow, thanks for saying that. I don't, I didn't even know that's what I was saying. Um, I'm having an outer body experience everyone. No, but I think like, if you can go back to your why you can actually see the discouragement and you'll actually either navigate around it, instead of carrying it or you'll actually be able to see like, are you even discouraged about the right thing? Like what you're discouraged about does have anything to do with your purpose on this planet? With why you do, what you do? (Brad: sure) Or is it just the fixation on something you can control or you thought you could and you can't and so you're like, "I'm discouraged."

Brad Crowell 9:46  

Right. The problem may be like one level above what has, you know, caused the immediate discouragement? (Lesley: Yeah) And so it's almost like you're getting discouraged over the symptom rather than the root.

Lesley Logan 10:00  

Brilliant. Wow, we are just making magic together.

Brad Crowell 10:03  

On fire.

Lesley Logan 10:04  

 So, so I, I think, what do I do when I'm discouraged? I really do have to take a step back. So 30,000 foot view, look at it. Is the thing I'm discouraged about having anything to do with my why? If so, what can I do? When we're discouraged, we're focused on what's not working.

Brad Crowell 10:28  

Sure.

Lesley Logan 10:30  

And the the reality is, is there's always gonna be things that are not working. So what is possible in that moment, and then the next thing is make a decision, just make a decision. Make a decision, make a decision to not do it, to take a step, to put pause on, you can also make a decision to think about it in three weeks. (Brad: hmm) Right? You can also like, put it go, "You know what, this problem I'm having? I'm just trying to think about it until on this date at this time." (Brad: Yeah) And if you can make a decision, that's action, it brings clarity. It's the antidote to fear. Boom! Second, it really is going to free up some emotions and I think we get attached to an outcome. And that's why we're discouraged because we're not getting the outcome we wanted. And if and so just like taking that step back really does make sure that you're actually working on the outcome you want in the first place.

Brad Crowell 11:23  

Yeah, I mean, also to can allow you to evaluate your expectations.

Lesley Logan 11:28  

Yes. Which oh my gosh, girl, like as a recovering perfectionist and overachiever. Like I struggle with expectation hangover, big time. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 11:40  

Expectation hangover.

Lesley Logan 11:42  

I didn't make that up. That is actually we should have her on the pod. Oh, my God, we should have her on the pod. (Brad: Let's do that.) Her name is it'll come to me, Christine Hassler. Boom! (Brad: I'm impressed.) She's got a book. It's called Expectation Hangover.

Brad Crowell 11:55  

I'm very impressed. (Lesley: Thank you so much.) Well, we'll look like like, you know, I hope that that was helpful. I feel like we like from from a from an actual practical perspective. What do you do when you're discouraged? Journal, speak with ... with someone about it, that could be a therapist or your bestie. You know, but you know, the important thing is to, to get it out and talk about it, so that you're not dwelling on it and dwelling on it and dwelling on it. (Lesley: Yeah) If you are discouraged, and you're having trouble going to sleep, I love to have a notepad on the side of my bed. And I just write it down, because it gives my mind permission not to keep circling it over and over and over again, because I won't have to like, "Forget it." I know in this case, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, it's not quite that something you're, you know forgetting. But it just helps you set it aside for the moment.

Lesley Logan 12:45  

I have one more thing. Ask yourself. Like, "Okay, what if I just stopped doing the thing?" (Brad: Oh, yeah.) "What if I just stopped doing the thing? That's not working, that I'm discouraged about?"

Brad Crowell 13:02  

Be aware if you ask that of somebody in your life, because they may get angry. (Lesley laughs) ... discouraged. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 13:08  

Now, if you do get angry. That means that you want to fight for it. (Brad: Yeah) And if you feel relief, that's a sign. (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 13:19  

Then you can, then maybe, maybe this is something you need to let go.

Lesley Logan 13:22  

Let go. And it's okay to let go of our things. Did you know that crossing out a goal is the same as checking it off? It's same. (Brad: Right) It's the same, deleting a goal is the same as checking it off. And so I just encourage you, it's okay to, I don't know if it was raised like we don't quit, but you can... quitting is not a weakness. If you like are taking that 30,000 foot view and your body is telling you like, "I don't want to fight for this anymore." (Brad: Yeah) It's not it's it's like actually allowing you to create space for something else. So how is that quitting? Anyways, that's a great question. (Brad: Wow) I freaking loved it. Wow, what a beautiful. (Brad: Yeah) Thanks, Brad for having that conversation (Brad: Yeah) with me. (Brad: That was a journey.) I feel like we have to take a deep breath. (Brad: Yeah) (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 14:07  

I mean, we can do that. Breathe in

Lesley Logan 14:12  

Through the nose. Out through the nose. I feel better.

Brad Crowell 14:18  

Okay. All right. Let's talk about Bree Gordon. Okay, using music to connect, which I got really excited about. Bree Gordon is a board certified Music Therapist, mother, podcaster, public speaker and innovator of new wellness programs. And she is a beautiful believer that music is the universal love language has created a career in helping others process and heal from trauma.

Lesley Logan 14:44  

Okay, so I knew you would get so stoked when you heard that. I was like, "Oh, my God, Brad's gonna freak the fuck out." (Brad laughs) But also do you know I just came to my mind? (Brad: Tell me.) I think it's easy to like go nod and go, "Yeah, music is a universal love language." But there is this Daily episode, we're not going to link it, you're not to find it yourself. It's a Sunday read. This journalist was trying to search for his father. He finally found him. His father was like, technically a pirate. Anyways, (Brad: Oh, yeah) he, he was playing some jazz music, I want to say it was jazz music. And like, was like, you know, his dad was like, like humming along, knew the beat, knew all the things, it might have been some sort of classical music. But anyways, it was music that like people recognize from the old times. And then he put in a CD (spoiler alert, he found his father.) He put in a CD and the da... his dad was like listening to it and like moving to it. And he was like, "Who is this? I've never heard this before." And he's like, "This is mine." And it was the same type of music that his dad loved. And they never knew each other. And they love the same music. Universal love language. Okay. (Brad: Pretty crazy) So I'm so grateful for her. And one thing I love that she said, is something that I've been really focusing my training education around is being trauma informed. She said, "You're not waiting for them to tell you they have trauma, you're acting as if they do." And so this is if anybody, if you did listen to the episode, we talked about this, and and the link is, in the show notes from the episode on Monday. It's not about asking what's wrong with you? It's about asking what happened to you? (Brad: Yeah) And when you are trauma informed as a person. In this... you can be trauma informed in any business, it doesn't matter what your business is, you're basically coming in to an environment with the assumption that people have had a traumatic experience and not wait for them (Brad: Yeah) to tell you.

Brad Crowell 16:32  

I mean, especially if you like, for example, something very relatable, if you even work in fitness, and you have taken a client through a workout and they cry afterwards. Right? Like something connected for them. And it could be I mean, it could be something they're experiencing now, or something that they experienced a long time ago. But like working it out, physically working it out, actually, like touched a nerve or touched a memory that triggered something there. Right? So anyway, being trauma informed would mean that, you know, you're going into teaching that person understanding that it's possible that they could have a reaction to it.

Lesley Logan 17:12  

Yeah. You're not you just, you don't even have to ask because a lot of people are unaware of especially childhood traumas, things like that they buried them so long. So you're basically just assuming that there is trauma there and giving people full permission in that way. And for my Pilates instructors who are listening to this, "Hello, I love you." You know, this is something like we put people on their backs, we put them in some interesting positions. And the weight movement specifically is how trauma is released in the body. And so if you can take some time to understand what being trauma informed is, and like ask yourself different things. And it's really interesting, I was talking with our, with my therapist about this, like, I don't like mirrors in my studio. I actually was never in a studio that had a lot of mirrors when I did Pilates. When I was training it didn't have mirrors, the only studio I had that had mirrors was Equinox. And those mirrors were so funny because you, you would look funny when you looked at them. And I was like, "I hate mirrors." But I specifically didn't have them. And that allowed a lot of women who had body image issues to feel comfortable and safe in my space. I didn't know I was doing it. So the point is, is like it's uh, I really love that you talked about being trauma informed. And it doesn't matter what, who you are listening to this and what you do, you can take some trauma informed classes. And if you're like, I don't even know what that means. Read the book, "What Happened to You?" You will instantly be educated in a way that will allow you like, even over Christmas as I was reading that book. I heard someone in our family say, "What's wrong with you?" to one of our dogs. And I was like, "It's what happened to him." (Brad and Lesley laughs) So anyways, okay, what did you love that she said?

Brad Crowell 18:47  

Yeah. Um, so, um... the, sorry, I was just thinking about everything that you were just saying there. (Lesley: Oh, it's okay.) Yeah. (Lesley: We can keep talking about it.) Well, I, I like the idea for me, it kind of connects with the idea of being prepared. (Lesley: mm-hmm) Right? Because we are, we are in a position of authority, you know, when we're, you know, if you're working with a client, so going back to that example, you know. And it's, it's actually, like really important to be prepared, if someone you know, is because I think you said something you kind of glossed over it, but you said, "Movement is how trauma is released from the body." (Lesley: Yeah) And I think that it's really important to understand that especially people who work in fitness. If movement is how trauma is released from the body. I mean, just think about that for just a second.

Lesley Logan 19:40  

Well, not even just who work in fitness, if you are in fitness, like if you take a fitness class. So if you are a listener who just likes to work out or is thinking about working out or if you're a listener who teaches people how to move. Both parties need to be informed because you might not know you might not be aware of the trauma that has happened to you. (Brad: Sure) You might be in a class and you might cry. I remember thinking something is wrong with me when I cried during elephant. And I don't even know what it was that it was bringing up...

Brad Crowell 20:09  

For Tracy out there elephant is it move and Pilates. (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 20:13  

So, I was doing this exercise and I cried. And I had something of, a voice came out of me that said to my teacher, "Today is actually not the day to teach me this exercise." (Brad: Hmm) And I and I, when I said it, I didn't even know whose voice that was. But not every person who has had trauma will have that voice come up for them. And so basically, like, movement is how trauma leaves. So there's a book by Two Sisters, I want to say it's called Burnout. I want to say it Brené Brown interviewed them. It's a great interview. Anyways, they say, like, ladies, especially since that's what most of you are. And to my men, then tell your girlfriends about this, the ladies in your life. If, like, if you had, if you've been ca... called on the street, and you bury that inside you...

Brad Crowell 21:07  

Emily and Amelia Nagoski. (Lesley: Yes) The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle.

Lesley Logan 21:12  

Yes. So they even say, obviously in that moment, you can't scream and yell at the dude who just drove pass with this cat call of something that then when you ignored it, they say something else, which is also more invigorating and traumatizing. It's traumatizing. The idea is though, that you cannot hold that within you because that's going to build, it's going to stay in your body. (Brad: hmm) And it's going to cause illness injury. We'll get into that later on this episode. But like, basically, they say, "If you can't in the moment, let the trauma out, let the let the feelings out of your body." Then as soon as you can, you need to let it out, punching a pillow, screaming, you know, things like that. You have to let it out. And so there are things that you didn't... Now that you've heard this, maybe you'll do that for in the future, but there's stuff in the past, and it's going to come out and it usually comes out through movement. So anyways, (Brad: Wow. Okay) Okay.

Brad Crowell 22:03  

Well, that is that is like super deep. Okay, one thing that I loved that she said, which is actually it's kind of perfect. I had I had chosen that your body will tell you, "What's going on?" (Lesley: Yeah) So I mean, it's we kind of covered it, you know, but But it's in addition to the emotional side of things where it's pulling out, you know, the trauma you may have experienced you, your body... So trauma is the event. The, like trauma actually is the event. Right? But then that is stored in your body. (Lesley: Yeah, if you don't let it out.) If you don't let it out. It's stored in your body. Right? And a perfect example of this is when Bree was talking about her experience from leading three summers of a trauma likes, like week, like a like, like a boot camp kind of a thing. (Lesley: Yeah) And she said the third time through she she literally came out of it. She needed a cane to walk. (Lesley: Yeah) And she realized that she wasn't she was absorbing, you know, their like, you know, she was taking on their stress, their trauma, (Lesley: mm-hmm) you know, into her and wasn't releasing it. And it was like affecting her. She had herniated discs. (Lesley: Yeah) How crazy is that?

Lesley Logan 22:11  

It's, I mean, like, it's, it's crazy. It's also not surprising. So your body will tell you what's going on. I'm grateful that you brought this up. So y'all I'm gonna, I'm finished in a breathwork training because I can't wait to add this to my retreats and also the coaching that we do. But, for example, if you've got stuff going with your lower back, that's a common place to store anger. If you've got stuff going on with your stomach and intestines, that's a place where you store fear. Heart and chest is heartbreak and sorrow, neck and shoulders is resentment or holding on to burdens. Voice and throat problems is oppression. And so those are just simple, right? But if you actually want to study this, there's like, there are people who are body workers who can tell you like your hip thing is like your mother's money problems like there's, it gets deep and I know that can sound like a double "whoo." It is a one whoo thing like there's a reason why the book - The Body Keeps the Score is exactly point, on point. And we need to start listening to our bodies and not our brains all the time. Because like you have a brain but you have that logical part. And then you have this like, there's an old brain is a subconscious brain. And so I think it's really important, (Brad: hmm) like if we actually start listening to our bodies, and instead of you mentioned earlier symptoms, instead of going to a doctor with symptoms (Brad: hmm) and getting medication to get rid of the symptoms, really trying to understand what is the problem here. (Brad: Yeah) What is the problem here? (Brad: Gotta get to the root.) Yeah. And so for Bree, she wasn't actually taking care of herself. In those moments she was taking on everything, she's taking, "I'll take on your panels," and for our caregivers listening, our mamas and like the people who have like aging parents, if you are taking care of them and not you, your body's going to tell you. (Brad: fascia workers) Mm hmm. (Brad: Yeah) But you know what I will say, a lot of body workers that I know, depend on if they were trained well, like my fascia and my rafters, a Reiki, they learn social workers learn this, to take care of themselves, to have (Brad: Yeah) boundaries. (Brad: boundaries) And a lot of people outside of those specialties, there's no training whatsoever on boundaries and taking care of yourself. (Brad: Yeah) Okay.

Brad Crowell 25:49  

Well, let's talk about those BE IT action items. What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted action items, can we take away from your convo with Bree Gordon? Well, I, she, she actually had a couple, but at the end, she said, "I'm only going to share one." But we, we're going through, there was a couple of recurring themes. But this one that she shared, which I'll talk about, is figure out what life looks like on the other side of trauma. And basically, it is it does take a moment of identifying that you're experiencing pain. You're experiencing this, you know, whatever it might show up as grief, you know. And you kind of do have to have this, this awareness that you're in it, but you don't have to stay in it. You will stay in it if you if you just keep dwelling on it. And she's saying, "To move on, you need to imagine what life will be like, when it's not, when you're not in it anymore in the same way." Right? And so, you know, she, she, she compared it to a mountain, and we're treating it like a mountain. And we're and we just imagine that we're never going to get to the other side of that mountain. But what does life look like on the other side, and when you can, when you could take a minute and envision that. And maybe you literally write it down like this could be where a dream board comes into play. (Lesley: mm-hmm) You know, where you actually have it on your mirror or on the wall, or on a thing in your wallet or it's on your dash in your car like something somewhere where you're going to see it on a consistent basis. That you know, like life isn't like this forever. And yes, it's painful. And it's never gonna like go away forever, but it will change and it won't be the same as it is today.

Lesley Logan 27:51  

Oh my gosh, you just made me think of Amy Cuddy because she had a traumatic experience. Amy Cuddy is the inspiration for the title of this podcast, by the way. (Brad: Oh, right.) And my assistant did DM her. I don't even know who told her that I approved that. (Brad laughs) Because like nothing could bring me more fear than (Lesley laughs) than if I'm asking her to be on this podcast. And if she might say "no," and we'll learn how to say no. And we'll just take and they go, "That's a great way to say no, we'll take that for ourselves." But anyways, she had a traumatic brain injury. And she had a mentor in college and a grad grad school say to her like this is you're gonna ask a question every single day in every single class so that you can feel like you belong here. And that's how and she didn't even realize that she was actually being the life, what life looked like on the other side of that trauma (Brad: Yeah) and how someone came up to her when she was at a working at a school and someone came up and said, "I don't belong here." And she's like, "Oh, you're gonna ask a question everyday." (Lesley laughs) So um, that's I think that's amazing and that's you know, we should even what even if you don't think that you're someone who's suffering from trauma in this moment, figure out what life looks like another set of whatever discouragement or problem you've got going on and (Brad: Yeah) will be really helpful.

Brad Crowell 29:10  

Yeah, well, what about you?

Lesley Logan 29:12  

My biggest takeaway - show up for others but do it with accountability for yourself. Hello, fill your cup first. She she was there as a giver and I think so many of us are, we're just give, we like are such givers. But you if you do not ...

Brad Crowell 29:28  

When we say she was there, are you talking about leading the trauma camp?

Lesley Logan 29:31  

Yeah, she's leading a trauma camp. She was doing these other things. And like she was just doing all these things to like, take care of so many people, (Brad: Yeah) to take care of their problems. But she was ignoring herself. (Brad: Yeah) And you all the plane literally says, "air mask on first, parents." Right? And that's for all of us, "air mask on first." I can't put Brad's air mask on for him if I have put my own on. So I know that it's hard. I know that the people that you are taking care of you are just like, you just want to be there for them. But if you are not being accountable to yourself first, you are not actually giving them everything that you could. Just not...

Brad Crowell 30:11  

Yeah, I mean, we talk about this all the time with with OPC, with onlinepilatesclasses.com, where, you know, the reason that you can do life better, is because you've prioritized yourself. You you aren't putting yourself on the back burner, right? Because when you especially with working out we are we know all the science behind why, you know, working out and you know, Pilates is amazing for your brain and your body. You know, and it's obviously logical too, like when you feel better about life, you're going to go do life better. (Lesley: Yeah) You know, so but what happens so often is, we don't prioritize ourselves. We don't make sure that you know, we have protected time to you know, get a workout in or read a book or whatever that might be that is, is you know, what, you're what you need. And and then, you know, at the end of the day, we're resentful, we're frustrated, we're tired, we're angry, we're, you know, and it just builds, it builds over time. And you know, after a while it becomes (Lesley: Yeah) it's like a path to burnout, straight up.

Lesley Logan 31:17  

Yeah, it is and so, or discouragement because, (Brad: or discouragement) you're putting so much in and not getting what you want out. And that's because you are not taking care of yourself. So I (Brad: Yeah) just I love this conversation. (Brad: Yeah) What a beautiful interview. (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Yeah. This is a great one) Patting myself on the back. But ... (Lesley laughs)

Brad Crowell 31:38  

You mean, you and me, I was also referencing the one when you have with Bree. That was also a great one. So, yeah. (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 31:45  

Um, you and I, but also yes, but Bree. No, especially with Bree, I just meant myself. I was just being (Brad laughs) that humble person I am. (Brad: My wife.) (Lesley laughs) (Brad: Amazing) Someday will have a show. It's called My Wife and it's basically ...

Brad Crowell 32:01  

It's gonna be me shaking my head. Yeah. (Brad laughs)

Lesley Logan 32:03  

About how humble I am. Y'all, thank you so much for being here. I'm so grateful for you. We are so grateful for you. You really matter to us more than we could ever actually tell you. But we could tell you if you screenshot this episode and share it with your takeaways. I will actually tell you in your DMs how grateful I am for you specifically. But please, you know, we can't change the world without sharing these messages with people. If you are nodding your head along with this and you're loving it, then please send it to the person that you know needs to hear it. If you want to text it to them, or if you want to share it on the Gram. That'd be great. And let us know how you're using these in your life. And we'll catch you in the next episode.

Brad Crowell 32:43  

Thanks so much.

Lesley Logan 32:46  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 33:19  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 33:30  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 33:34  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 33:43  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 33:55  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes, so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai

Bridging the gap through music, Bree Gordon joins the podcast today to discuss her experiences with music therapy, trauma informed care, and how to recognize what your body is telling you.

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] .

And as always, if you’re enjoying the show please share it with someone who you think would enjoy it as well. It is your continued support that will help us continue to help others. Thank you so much! Never miss another show by subscribing at LesleyLogan.co/subscribe.

In this episode you will learn about:

• How we stop living in survival mode
• Showing up even when you don’t know your next step
• Your body will tell you what’s going on
• The connection of trauma
• Being trauma informed 
• The heart of the Mindful Mentor Podcast
• Sitting and listening to others

Episode References/Links:

• Mindful Mentor Podcast
• IG @mindfulmentorbree
• FB @mindfulmentorbree
• Website mindfulbree.com
• Email: [email protected]
• Non-Profit: House of Lovezillionaires
• The Gift of Fear
• The Body Keeps the Score ... by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk

Guest Bio:

Bree is an experienced speaker on trauma and connection. She has worked with dozens of universities, non-profit organizations and for profit businesses from around the United States including the University of Miami, the Alzheimer's Association and the Stoneman Douglas community in Parkland, Florida. Bree has been featured in multiple national media platforms including NPR, BroadwayWorld and VeryWell. She also hosts a weekly podcast, The Mindful Mentor, focused on building a culture of self-awareness and empathy. With a degree and board certification in Music Therapy and 13 years experience working in medical and community settings, Bree is highly respected for her clinical work as well as her success in creating jobs in the field of creative arts therapies. Bree has served as the co-owner and Director of Creative Arts Therapies of the Palm Beaches since 2012, staffing and developing clinical music and art therapy programs for over 100 organizations throughout South Florida.

OPC Flashcards:

• OPC Flashcards are on Amazon
• OPC Flashcards are on our site

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating and leave us a review on iTunes, Podcast Addict, Podchaser or Castbox.

Resources

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube!
• Lesley Logan website
• Be It Till You See It Podcast
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube
• Profitable Pilates

Social Media

• Instagram
• Facebook
• Tik Tok
• LinkedIn

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

Hello, Be It Till You See It, listener. What's up babe? How are you? Ah, I can't wait for you to talk like hear this woman's words. And then I have homework for you, I want you to go listen to her Mindful Mentor podcast and listen to the episode we were on in the binge out. She's really an amazing, unique person. And, you know, definitely a be it till you see it like person, didn't even know she's beening until she see it, saw it until she was but um, it's there's some great tips in here. And also we talked a lot about the trauma informed and activating and how words and sounds and things can be activating. And so I definitely, I'm excited for you to kind of hear that because I think we talked about trauma, we talk about trauma informed, but sometimes don't always know what that means. So, I hope that this really helps give you some more information. She also gave some great resources for those who are interested in being a little bit more trauma informed in your careers because there's different trauma informed trainings for different industries. And so definitely check that out. There's some great books that she talked about. I have read - The Body Keeps a Score, I'm gonna reread it actually, because I read it so long ago. I think it's time for a reread. Anyways, I'm gonna let Bree tell you who she is, and really dive into how she got to where she is. But I just want to say, just a huge thank you for you being here with your earbuds and on your walk, taking the time to let other people share their stories with you and inspire you. And one thing a little spoiler alert in there is that like it's not easy, right? It's not easy what you're doing. It's not even, it's not even easy to say, "Yeah, you don't have to turn on this podcast right now." That's actually a choice. It's hard to do. Like you're, you're weighing the options of what other things you should be doing or binging out on. Or maybe you should be doing an extra hour of work. And so I just want to say thank you for making a choice to get a little dose of inspiration and hear a tip on how you can be it till you see it. So without further ado, I found out that she's a fellow Scott woman like myself, (Lesley laughs) right before we went on. So my team had to edit out a little pre intro intro. But here she is Bree Gordon.

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guests will bring Bold, Executable, Intrinsic and Targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Alright, Be It listeners. I have Bree Gordon here. She is a fellow Scottish family member, although I don't know maybe related somehow. We just discovered this five seconds ago that we're both Scottish. Um, anyways, Bree and I met because I put myself out there and I said, "I want to do a podcast swap." And I think it's important that you hear that because I could have totally been rejected, I could have totally heard crickets. And she's like, "Hey, I want to do that with you. And I only have 7pm, Eastern Time. (Lesley laughs) And we'll get into that." So Bree, welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast. Please tell everyone who you are. And also maybe why we only can talk at 7pm on a Tuesday.

Bree Gordon 3:41  

Happy to cover all those things. First of all, thank you so much Lesley for having me on for reaching out. That is just how all this beauty is getting created right now. I feel like since we are getting back into the real world, I guess. But after coming out of a year and a half or close to two years of having to make connections in a new way like social media. I appreciate so much that you did reach out. For those with exceptional hearing, you may be already able to identify why the 7pm Eastern Standard Time is my talk time. That is the beautiful vocal jazz stylings of my seven month old that you hear in the background. So just going to go ahead and call that out for the beginning. But again, so thankful to be here. Again, my name is Bree Gordon, hence the Scottish connection we were able to tell with our last names there. I am a few different things. I am a Board Certified Music Therapist by day I guess as they say. I am a mother as we covered. I am a podcaster as well, public speaker and I have in the last two years started developing ... a new LLC that helps with wellness programs as well. So my background as a Board Certified Music Therapist, and working in medical music therapy for the last 13 years, has just connected me to the realization, one, what I already knew is that music truly is not to be cliche, but truly is a universal language that can connect all of us. But in also working with so many different people from such different walks of life, different cultures, languages, ages, all the things that could divide us been able to find so many things that connect us, and so many commonalities within the human experience, which is why I have kind of expanded my view not just from music therapy, but just to wellness in general, specifically, recovering from trauma. So, I am located in South Florida, originally from Toronto, Canada, grew up in upstate New York ... (Lesley: Oh, my goodness) move down to South Florida, basically just moving on and down that East Coast, you know. (Lesley laughs) Moving on down, that's not how the song goes. 

Lesley Logan 5:55  

... to go all the way down to the East side, right? You're on the East side. (Lesley laughs) (Bree: Through the East side) Oh, my gosh. (Bree: Exactly) So you know, what I love about meeting so many guests is, and maybe it's just because like attracts like, but no one is just doing like one thing. Like there's a couple of things that we're doing. I think it's because like no one is just anything. What, but I think we have to go into music therapy for trauma. Can you explain kind of what that even what does a day in that look like? And how did you get started doing that? Like, did you know that you wanted to be when you grew up?

Bree Gordon 6:27  

No... Well, there's a couple ways to answer that. I knew that I wanted to do something in music. And I knew that I was not called to be a teacher in this life. (Bree laughs) So that forced me to kind of explore other options. So back up, all the way to being a young kiddo. My mom and I moved to the States, when I was three, my mom worked as a CNA in a nursing home. And being a single parent, and I was only I am an only child, there was not always a lot of childcare options. So like days that I didn't have, you know, daycare or school, I'd be going to work with mom. And so mom tells me I don't have clear memories of this exactly. But being in the forum of the nursing home as a three year old, holding court and (Lesley laughs) just singing in my little heart out. And I remember my grandma took me to a high school production of Fiddler on the Roof. And I'll just be honest, I come from where I grew up in New York, you know, it was a part Scottish part Dutch, like group Dutch Reformed and everybody around me was a Dutch farmer. And everybody looks the same and talk the same and worship the same. And so Fiddler on the Roof was a very odd choice for the local high school to do but it was my first Broadway show. And I remember looking at it and saying, "I want that. I want to do what they're doing. I want to be that free on a stage. I want to step into a new role and be a new person." At like five, I (Lesley: Yeah) was just like connected with that. So we had these home videos of me doing if I were rich man in my front yard, like (Lesley laughs) this is how I would entertain. Well, I didn't realize truly that this was such an exceptional experience to be so comfortable with people outside of your generation, outside of your own life experience until later in life. So when I started to look up options for careers in music, and realize music therapy was one of them. I had been working for my mom and my mom was working in homecare private home duty at the time, so would help her out. So I knew I wanted to help people and I knew I want to be in music. So I went to school for music therapy and everybody wanted to be with the kids. Everyone wanted to do early education, you know, sit on the floor with the kids and play music and I did not again feel called to that. So I didn't realize how special it was that I already knew how to bridge this gap between myself and someone different than me through music. So, I started doing all the senior placements and I did like geriatric psych psychology, locked unit, hospice care all these things, eventually ended up moving to South Florida for an internship in hospice care, and worked in that field for seven years. And then went into private practice and started working in Oncology and with seniors with alzheimer's, dementia, all these things. Fast forward to 2018 when we had the tragic shooting here in Parkland (Lesley: Yeah) at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School. And, so I volunteered my time and got a team together to join our art therapists in the area to just create a space for (Lesley: Yeah) this community. They had like two, 10 days to two weeks off of school. So for the students, the parents, siblings, all that to come and have a space to just be, to just create, to feel safe, to feel supported. And out of that I was hired to work with the students for the next few years. So I've done a lot of programming. Through that work ...

Lesley Logan 9:50  

That's ... I'm so sorry to interrupt. (Bree: Yeah) That's interesting because I was looking over your bio, and I'm like, "How did you end up with trauma?" And it's because trauma happened in your like backyard.

Bree Gordon 10:01  

Literally. I mean, people say that right? It's our backyard. This was before we even knew what was going on. My staff was calling me, "Hey, I can't get to the site, the roads are blocked, I see all these flashing lights, I see all these media vans, I see helicopters. I can't get to, you know, the afterschool program for kiddos with on the autism spectrum that's just down the road." So before we even knew what had happened, before we would turn on the television, (Lesley: Yeah) I'm getting you know, calls from my staff, "There's something's big going on. I can't get to work." So once I started doing this work and studying more about trauma informed music therapy, and basically what that means is that trauma informed is a lens in which you treat through. So knowing that sounds that images, that references, that things can be activating. And I purposely use activating instead of triggering, because I work so much with gun violence survivors, we try to avoid any language, I... again just want to mention the seven month old in the background ... (Lesley laughs) just in case you missed the top of this podcast, that's what's happening in the background. (Lesley laughs) And so anything that you are bringing in which music lyrics can be very activating, right? The sounds of drums being (Lesley: Yeah) hidden or activating, so having that lens in the education before walking into a room is really important. So through that work, I realized, well, I've been doing that all along. My seniors in hospice care and my memory care groups, are World War II, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, active war, active duty ward veterans, Holocaust survivors, again, I live in South Florida, we have the largest amount of hospice, (I'm sorry) Holocaust survivors in our community, then I think anywhere other than New York City, for the United States. I work in addiction recovery, a lot of early childhood or adverse childhood experiences, that are traumatic that they have survived. So this whole time in my career, I really have been focused on working with individuals who survived a trauma. Well, not only that, but then expand the worldview even further, which has led me into my newer project of The Mindful Mentor is, that's all of us. (Lesley: Yeah) That's not just someone I'm going to meet in a medical setting, that is all of us. And with COVID, we have all experienced collective trauma.

Lesley Logan 12:22  

Oh, I mean, that's and that's interesting thing I have, I have my therapist coming into my fitness business coaching group. At the time that we're recording this, it's like in two weeks. So when you hear this, everyone will have happened. But the reason I'm bringing her in this time is to actually talk about how we have to stop living in survival mode, because COVID caused every business owner, cause every person to go into survival mode, that's a great mode. But it's like a fifth gear, you're not supposed to live in it, like it's not good. On the engine, it's not good on the mechanic. It's not good, right? Like you would never do that your car. But I see all these business owners, I see all these women, especially like in this survival mode. And that is also traumatic to like, it's you, you just don't see things happening in the same way that they are when you're in that mode versus when you're not in that mode. So I have her coming in. But you're you made this excellent point that we've had this collective trauma. And I guess, like, I'm ... for the first time doing a training that is a trauma informed training, it's a trauma informed breathwork training. It's actually really interesting for me, because, you know, you hear these things, you can be activating towards people, or using the word that's commonly used, like you could trigger someone. And it makes a lot of people go, "Well, then what do I do and how do I do this? And then how do I act?" And then it's like, "Oh, how do I be it till I see it? If I, like good actually accidently do this?" And so it's like, how, how do you, you know, you went into the space in 2018. Without really like, it's like you had ever worked with a situation like that in the past? So how did you do that? And how, and like, is there any, maybe there's a way we can all like, learn something through your experience? When when it comes to like, how do you act in a place that you don't know how to act or how to do or how to heal?

Bree Gordon 14:06  

That's, that's a really great question. And actually, so fitting to your show that I didn't even think about beforehand, because truly, that's what I was doing. I didn't even know I've never heard of trauma informed at that point, to be honest with you. So, I was being it till I saw it, and that in that moment. And what that led to was actually partnering up eventually with our music therapist, who's been working with the children in Sandy Hook, and then Connecticut. And then we were able to give trainings at our national conferences. But before I got to that point where I'm helping others, I'm thinking, "Gosh, this is totally," and again, at the moment, I really did think fresh and new and I've never done anything like this before. So I had to just show up, right? First of all, I had to know if I was the right person, if I truly could not handle this. It was there was a transference issue, meaning that there was something coming up that was too strong within myself, that I was not able to be present for the students, then I needed to find another therapist that could do that. So there is a point where you're not always going to be the best fit for every situation ... (Lesley: Right) But and this one, it did feel comfortable for me to be involved in. I was able to set not set aside my feelings, but just kind of honor what it was coming up in me and then address that in the appropriate place, which meant going to trauma informed therapy for myself, honestly, to be aware of what was coming up with me. Working in this, is is heavy, right? These are students who have survived an extremely traumatic event, they are wanting to walk through it with you through song lyric, through a discussion, whatever way that comes up through music, whatever way it is. And as the therapist you need to know how to be present, first and foremost, and second, know how to handle what's coming up for you. So I was really fortunate that I had a team of therapists that I worked with. So we were meeting for supervision like one to two hours every day, that was a total luxury. I've never had that anywhere else in my career, that I had that much time built into a contractor, to a salary that I can debrief and process. So ...

Lesley Logan 16:13  

So you yourself, were going to a session to debrief and process what your day was like. 

Bree Gordon 16:20  

Right. So when we were doing what started as a summer camp. So we're working with the students like 30 hours a week through the summer. The summer camp started in June, the shooting happened in February. (Lesley: Yeah) So this was, this was not PTSD. This was T, (Lesley: Yeah) capital T happening in the moment. So all of us therapists would get together at the end of the day and would process through. And then by the end of those six weeks, I started to realize that I was the only one of them not in therapy for myself. So then I went to get that additional work done. And I'll tell you what, it's amazing, be it till you see it kind of show up again, being present first and foremost, being supported, knowing that you have a support network around you. But then you really do you have to be accountable for that. Because for me, second summer, third summer comes around, I get to the end of the summer, and I'm just not feeling good. And and this was I started out this is a pattern every time I get to the end of the summer, my back is totally out of whack. I think we talked about this on (Lesley: Yeah) my show too, your body will let you know (Lesley: Yeah) what's up. Right? So, I had thought, "Well, I went to therapy and I talked about this. I process to this. I'm good." (Lesley: Yeah) Right? ...

Lesley Logan 17:33  

I feel like anyone listens like, "Oh, yeah, I've been there." And like, "I did that I already. Checked, checked" (Lesley laughs)

Bree Gordon 17:37  

I did ... No, no, I took care of that, like I already did that. So not feeling good, not feeling good. Suddenly, I'm like walking with a cane. Not not terribly normal for someone in their early 30s. I go into see a doctor, and they said, "Where you in a car accident? You have three herniated discs." (Lesley: What?) I'm like, "Nope, I hosted or I lead a trauma camp." And I didn't get any help for myself through it. And now this is my third year doing it. So I know better, right? But I have to stay accountable for it. So I'm not sure, I feel like that does kind of lead into the be it till you see it because clearly I am not it yet. I'm still learning (Lesley: Yeah) so gotta show up and constantly keep learning freeze up, the advocating freeze up, listening to your body. And the when you are doing that you are becoming what those students need. You are becoming what that community needs because you are also taking care of yourself.

Lesley Logan 18:32  

Yeah. Well, and I think like, you know, because I always say like, "Take messy action." It doesn't mean like be irrational or erratic or crazy, unplanned like, it sounds like you had never done this before. But you actually did the work to go, "Am I the right person for this? Is my team, the right people for this?" What do we have to do to get through this, we can support them and not actually make it worse for them? But then you also just did it. And and and then you learned while doing to the end of the summer, you're like, "Wow, learn something about myself. I have to add one more thing to this list of things to do." And I think I think a lot of people get stuck on that because if they don't know, the roadmap, they don't know all the parts, they haven't seen all the way through, then they don't actually get started. And especially with something like this. Like, I do think a lot of people have seen something bad happens in their community or they're like, "Oh my gosh, I want to know how to I want to help but I don't know how to help." And I guess like, you know you in that moment, there was something in your head that was like, "I think we can help here." And I guess do do is it something you can pinpoint or is it just a feeling?

Bree Gordon 19:37  

It's a good question, because I like I started this conversation saying, "I didn't want to work with kids." Right? (Lesley: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) (Lesley: You also had a kid ...) I didn't know at the time ... (Lesley: Yeah) What what an absolute joy of having a child could be. Now I know. But at the ... I just I want to work with my seniors the rest of my life. I just I love working with, you know, neurodegenerative diseases, which sounds like a really weird thing to say. But I do, I love bringing joy and feelings of success and positivity and accomplishment to those that have cognitive decline. So this was an opportunity that I was like actively seeking ever before. And I would usually refer it out to other people in the community that I thought would be better fits. I almost wonder if it was a strong personal connection. I'm a trauma survivor, as a child myself. Part of that is complicated grief, losing my dad at a young age, it wasn't to anything violent as this would be. But I believe that there is a connection within trauma, (Lesley: Yeah) that if you have experienced something you have experienced, especially as a child, the feeling of being completely out of control of the world happening around you. (Lesley: Yeah) And just this constant yearning for grounding. (Lesley: Yeah) And for a strengthened a sense of self and for connection and identified with all of those things. Now, obviously, I'm not going to say have been through what those kids have been through, I haven't. But I could connect with that feeling of needing those things. So I do think it was something in myself and again, I go back to listening to yourself, (Lesley: Listening to your ... ) listening to your body, your mind, your heart, your intuition, your gut. It's I mean, I don't know about everybody here. I don't know everyone's gut intimately, obviously. (Lesley and Bree laughs) But mine has led me to some amazing opportunities that on paper, I would have said no to.

Lesley Logan 21:44  

Oh, I mean, you're there's this great book called The Gift of Fear. It is who is it, who is it -Gavin de Becker. And actually, just because the world is so small, I actually taught a woman how to teach Pilates who might be listening to this podcast whose husband worked works with Gavin de Becker's company, it's a security firm, and he was in trauma when he was a child. And he, his life experience led him to actually be able to see and understand when people are actively going to do what they threatened to do, or when they're just a little bit off. Right? Or a lot off, but not actually going to act on it. So he's worked with the FBI and the CIA, all the things, right. And he has a security firm. He wrote a book called The Gift of Fear. And his whole thing is, every single one of us, our gut is telling us what is happening? Do we feel safe in this moment? Is this person a good person? Should we trust this person? Like it literally is, it has these receptors. It so amazing, but our brain is like, "Oh, you're being judgmental or you don't know like, he seems like a really nice person. He's got nice clothes on, like, all these things." Oh, you know, all this stuff and our logic, our brain is like, trying to talk us out of out of our gut is saying, but like, logic will fail you most of the time where your gut is pretty on and it's not and it's okay to go with that. So the book is really dense and it's really interesting. And I highly recommend it, especially my ladies listening to this because it really is informative as far as like, what it means to be like protective of yourself, and also like a little over protective, like, "What it does that mean?" Right? And then you also made me think of the book like, "What Happened to You?" which is a some amazing research they've done on trauma on like, infants, you know, we think that babies don't have memories before three o'clock, three o'clock, three, three years old, three o'clock, before ... 3pm. They have no ... (Lesley laughs)

Bree Gordon 23:31  

 My baby did not to remember any of this becuase here it's still 2:30 ... (Lesley: Yeah) (Lesley laughs) So, it's fine.

Lesley Logan 23:35  

3 years old, but the reality is, is that they have found and they study people long enough to know that if even under in three, your first three months, you've had something traumatic, it really does affect, you're life. 

Bree Gordon 23:45  

Your birth experience (Lesley: Oh) is traumatic. (Lesley: Yeah) I mean, it's ... in addition to all this other stuff, I'm working through an online training and play therapy. And it's neuro relational, child centered play therapy, and a lot of it is on trauma. And the memories that they find these children even reenacting, like their birth experience, even at four or five years old. (Lesley: Whoa) Yeah, there was one story in the training where one of the child came in the room. And one of the things about play therapy, particularly this model. Is you don't intervene. I mean, you have to keep it safe in the room, but you're not guiding the play. It's truly the child is expressing themselves through the place, you don't want to really parameters around it. And so this child found in like a beanbag chair, an opening in just a small hole and found their way into the beanbag chair, and then became very emotional upon interacting or, sorry, playing out, coming out of the beanbag chair. And what she realized when talking to the parent was that there was a traumatic birth experience. Now this is like a four or five year old ...

Lesley Logan 24:54  

That's so crazy, that's amazing and crazy. It's like ...

Bree Gordon 24:56  

It's incredible, right? (Lesley: Yeah) And I don't think I'll ever forget that story because you know, as a clinician, but now also, as a parent, I'm thinking you can go crazy thinking about, "Are you gonna remember this. Did I just ruin you?" Like, "How much am I going to pay for therapy for this?" (Lesley laughs)

Lesley Logan 25:10  

You know, I think I think today's parents who are very aware of therapy are very much aware of like, "Oh my God, how much is this bill gonna cost? Like, I just help them." Whereas like I don't know. You and I are a lot the same age. Like, "I don't think our parents worry about therapy. I'm being honest." (Lesley laughs)

Bree Gordon 25:25  

The first time, my stepson came home and he won't listen to this. So we're fine. But he comes home. And, and I nursing my baby. And you know, he's 18. Right? And the poor kid, didn't ask for any of this, he's super sweet. He's like our babysitter, extraordinary and they have the best relationship. But he walks in the house, and I'm just like, "I can't even afford what I'm gonna have to pay for this later in life. I'm so sorry. (Lesley laughs) Like, this is (Lesley: Yeah) just your life now. We just (Lesley: Yeah) my boobs out. I apologize." (Lesley and Bree laughs)

Lesley Logan 25:52  

Oh, you know, what I do find though, it's like, men with like, younger siblings or sisters are a lot easier around women as they're older women who, especially if they end up marrying a woman, I think everything's a little less weird, (Lesley laughs) more normal. So, I think it's, you know, I think it's good for him. (Lesley laughs)

Bree Gordon 26:09  

For the sensitive that comes along with it, for sure.

Lesley Logan 26:11  

Yeah. But also, you know, like, it's, um, I, when I see people freak out, this has nothing to do this podcast ... But like, some of the angry anger fights me the most, is when I see those people who get upset at someone breastfeeding in public. But then they're the same due to oogle and I'll go over girl wearing a too low cut of a top. And it's like, I just, I'm really starting to I'm really confused. You don't like it when they're out? But you do, like ... (Lesley laughs)

Bree Gordon 26:36  

Also, did you just not get cow's milk in your coffee, cafe latte, (Lesley: Yeah) whatever. I mean, like, I know, and I didn't get it until I was in this experience. I was just kind of like, "Oh, whatever. I didn't really have an opinion about it." And I'm like, "No, this is actually the most (Lesley: Yeah) natural normal thing." Anyway that's a whole other podcast. 

Lesley Logan 26:51  

... whole another another thing. So okay, I want to talk a bit about, I want to definitely get into what led you into your own podcast, but before then, for people who are intrigued by trauma, trauma therapy, being trauma informed? Is it as easy as googling like trauma informed trainings near me? Or (Lesley laughs) is there like, is there a book list or a site or place on your site where people can get this information? I just want to make sure that people who are intrigued by being trauma informed, because it does, it does. It is freeing when you actually understand it a bit more than when you just hear like, "Oh, your actions could trigger something or activate something." (Bree: Right) Like, you know, especially for the ... let me just explain we Pilates instructors listen to this a lot. And they touch people. (Bree: Yeah) And when they hear (Bree: Yeah) like, "Oh, make sure you don't, you could, if you don't touch .." If you touch them in a class that wasn't expecting it that could be activating or triggering. Like, it makes them go, "Am I allowed to touch? I'm allowed to do?" And I I have found in doing this trauma informed training, even though it's a breathwork training, that I have a lot more since I have awareness around it, I also have a little bit more freedom. I'm like, "What is acceptable and what isn't? And how do you work with that?" And so where can people go who are intrigued by this and ready to learn more?

Bree Gordon 28:01  

For sure. First of all, awareness and informed implies curiosity. Right? And the best place to begin your curiosity is just asking your patient or your client, "Are you comfortable with this? How does this make you feel? Can I do this?" I think I am going to give you some great resources in addition to that, but really, each person is unique, their trauma experience is unique, they're going to have different responses to it. So I would say treating as a very individualistic experience, is is just a great way to start before you can read the books and do the trainings and all of that. As far as books go - The Absolute Bible on Trauma Informed Care is the Body Keeps the Score ... by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, the Dutch Dutch name ... (Lesley laughs) fabulous resource, if you're going back to Heritage's today, (Lesley: Yeah) that is just a great place to start. And it it connects to so much of what you've already been talking about with the focus on touch and on breath. And on knowing your own body because it's true, it is stored just in my and that's why I tell you my story about herniating the discs in my back because I could go and like I said, I've traveled all over the country talking about this. And yet that is still happening to me. So we can read all the resources in the world being aware of your own body because it's true that our body does keep the score of what we have experienced, what our emotions have experiences, what we physically experienced, psychologically, all of that. (Lesley: Yeah) Beyond that for trainings, I would say to look into something specific to whatever your industry is. So there's not going to be like a one stop shop for trauma informed. So for myself, we have a training for music therapy, for Pilates, like you mentioned, there's a training for breathwork, things like that, even if you're in the corporate world. I've seen that there are corporate training for being an employer that is trauma informed, which I think is brillant. (Lesley: Wow, that's amazing) I love that. Yes. So even if you're just in the you're not in a helper profession or therapy or anything like that, as a professional, but you're in the corporate world, financial marketing, whatever that looks like, I think marketing actually isn't a great area to be trauma and perfect. (Lesley laughs) (Lesley: Yeah, I think so) Right? Just think about your messaging and what you're actually promoting. And well, how to do it, how the best way to do it in a sensitive way. So but like I said, just for getting started today for make, making one trauma informed decision today, after you stop listening to this podcast, if there's someone in your circle, a family, friend, community member, client, patient, whatever it is, that you have that concern with, that you think that they might be activated in a way, ask them, (Lesley: Yeah) you know, talk to them. Find out from them personally, and I'll be willing to bet just making that step of that awareness and curiosity and, and compassion to to connect with them. You're already going to start bridging that gap, (Lesley: Yeah) without taking it even a step further.

Lesley Logan 31:02  

I agree. I think that's, you know, and also, something that is easier to do. Not easy. But is it as easy as that is like, if people are talking about how they're feeling, you can also just listen. You don't have to actually like, you don't have to agree, you don't have to ask, you have to say, "I see that in you as well." You don't have to, like you could just like if they can just, they can just talk and you can just sit there with your eyes open and hold the space. And then you can can ask them, "Do you need more time?" And if they're like, "Yeah," then they can keep going. If they don't, they'll go, "Okay." And then you can, you can also just move you can keep going, right? So I think like people are like, "Oh, I have to have a conversation with them." And, and one of the things that we're doing is like, being a feeler and like, it's kind of amazing when you just let someone talk about how they're feeling. And then you don't say anything. And then we ask if they want to pop out question, which is like, "What's your favorite color or whatever?" And, you know, like, it kind of brings it back. But it's kind of amazing like, if you just let people feel what they're feeling. It doesn't keep, it doesn't have to keep going. The feeling can have its moment and it can pass like a cloud, you know, not that it's over. But there's some interesting things with that. I think we can all learn like little bits, until because you know, everyone has their own thing. And I think a lot of people listening are to be all or nothing. It doesn't mean you have to go all the way today. But you can start with curiosity and asking, and I love that tip. Thank you for sharing that. Okay, so you have a podcast - Mindful Mentor? (Bree: Yeah) I've been on it, y'all. It was a frickin' great conversation. So you're gonna go listen to that.

Bree Gordon 32:29  

You're awesome. (Lesley laughs) Yes, yes, yes, you are. Let me just say, we're not going to say, "We invite you." No, you have to (Lesley: Yeah) go because Lesley you're incredible. And you just, you brought so much... just clever wisdom. I don't know if you've ever been told you have clever wisdom before. But that is how I walk away from this, I just, I felt renewed as an interviewer even just talking to you, and just as a person. So I just want to thank you and honor you again for your gifts you gave to The Mindful Mentor, because everyone who listens will be blessed by that. Thank you.

Lesley Logan 33:00  

Well, words of affirmations, my love language and clever wisdom is going in the next bio. So (Lesley laughs) (Bree: Done) we're gonna, (Bree: Yeah) we're gonna put that in there. I'm always looking for new, new words to go in there. So what made you start a podcast? Because as someone who started one, it is a lot of work, that (Bree: Yeah) you maybe are like, "I talk, I do lives all the time. Just gonna do this." And then you're like, "Wow, there's there's some steps in here." (Lesley laughs) (Bree: Yup) So (Bree: Yeah), what made you start it and what are you excited about with it right now?

Bree Gordon 33:29  

Yeah, thank you. So my background was in live radio, which I started as kind of a marketing arm of my creative arts therapy practice, which is Creative Arts Therapies, the Palm Beaches. And so we staff and develop music and art therapy programs for medical and educational and community based programs. So we were kind of using the radio show as a way to interview different individuals in the community, but also outside in the national, sometimes even international people to call in and interview about creative approaches to healthcare and to education. So (Lesley: That's so cool) anyone who had kind of, yeah, was really neat, a different like, out of the box idea of how to reach people, because as we talked about everybody is is individual. So sometimes programs that are so structured, aren't going to meet everyone's needs. So I did that for several years, and I loved it. But then I kind of wanted the experience of trying to do something a little bit more flexible on my own and trying to produce it myself. And so that's that's the journey I'm in now. And it is a lot of work, I will say that but it's doable. I have do not have any kind of formal audio tech training. I'm just smart enough to know when to delegate things (Lesley and Bree laughs) to other people, the things that I cannot do. I love interviewing, I love putting out content. So I just I kind of took a break from it for a little while, and then I'm going to go back to a point that I made earlier. So the work that I did was Stoneman Douglas. Like I said that kind of have renewed my energy as far as seeking out opportunities to do trauma informed work. So I reached out to a community here close to, like I said, I'm in West Palm Beach, Florida. So one of the communities here, Riviera Beach has an extremely high rates of gun violence, and especially a lot of young individuals dying from gun violence. So it's not a community that's been rocked by a school shooting, it's a community that's rocked by every time they leave school and walk home. (Lesley: Yeah) And that that is a persistent daily fear. So I kind of reached out to the community there. And I've made some incredible friends from that, that I just, I just can't even tell you how these women have blessed my life. But somehow I just divine intervention ended up in the lives of these women who are leading this impact this intervention for young women and young men to be supported in environments so that they know they have other options, that they they don't have to feel the pressures to go into gang life (Lesley: Yeah) or into drugs or if they're survivors of violence, survivors of sexual trauma that they have some who believe them,who will listen to them and to break these generational ties into just build up and just breathe life into this community. I can't say enough about it's House of Loveillionaires, if you want to check out a nonprofit doing that work. And the vision on Sabrina ...

Lesley Logan 36:22  

Can you say it again? House of Lovezillionaires? ... (Bree: ah, close Loveillionaires) Loveillionaires. Oh, I love that.

Bree Gordon 36:30  

So Sabrina Harris is the executive director of that nonprofit, and she got a calling, you know, from from God, that's her faith, that said, "Build a house with a million rooms, you know, for people to just love on them." And so she started this nonprofit, she's a licensed mental health counselor, they do a lot of community outreach programs. So, I met with them a few times, and, you know, did some programs together for for the women in that community. And as we're sitting in this room, and I was the only white person in this room, and so they trust me and bring me into (Lesley: Right) their community. I didn't live there, to trust that I had good intentions that I was going to stick around. But it wasn't just going to say, "Hey, I want to help" and then take off, (Lesley: Right) I felt the warmth of that. And then hearing everyone's experience, I again, could connect it to so much that I had experienced as a child, not the same. I know that I didn't have the same situation. And I was also very aware of certain privileges that I had because of my skin color in that moment. But some of the things that they were sharing, I could connect to, and I'll never forget sitting in this room having a conversation on couches, just kind of fireside chat style, and thinking, "These are stories that need to be (Lesley: Told. Yeah) elevated in the community, these these need to be told." And not only the stories need to be told, but the stories of empathy of how people are responding to each other throughout this, how they are aware of it themselves. Because it's one thing to experience something, but to never share it, to never acknowledge it in yourself to let it just sit. And hey, again, spoiler alert, that's what's gonna affect your body. Right? (Lesley: Yeah) And then when you share it, it's like a lifeline, you toss out for someone else to say, "I really needed to hear that. I'm going through that too." And that's how that community and empathy grows as well. So yeah, I just I wanted to take the work that I've been doing, which made me aware of my my life, really, and all the things (Lesley: Yeah) that I had kind of shoved down and not been (Lesley: Yeah) acknowledging for myself. And because I think it took being in a moment where I was with individuals that if you had taken a snapshot, you would see all the differences, quite honestly, if you had really dug in, you would see all the things that connected us.

Lesley Logan 38:50  

Oh, that is so beautiful. And I think that has, I think that's really a lot of moments. I think, like, face value, it's like, how are these people all together, but like, if you go on the deeper scale of like, cellular level of experiences and emotions, there's so much that actually does bring us together and in listening to each other, it has so much healing, you know, opportunities and, and without that, then there's really no way that you can do anything that's next. Right? Like as you I mean, we all know like, if ... I mean we go to Cambodia, a lot people are shocked by like how family members can treat their children or have their children do different things. And it's like, when you don't know how you're eating your next meal. You're not actually thinking about the, the elevating of your child. You're not like if the Maslow's hierarchy of needs, (Bree: It's just gonna say yeah) it is a real thing. And so when people you know, I had a client who is frustrated with like some crime in her area, and I'm like, "You have to understand, if they don't feel that their needs are being met on a very basic level. They're not seeing the other people as anything other than an opportunity for them to survive."And I think that like, it is so important for us to, to understand that but I think it's really beautiful, how you let your your curiosity and your gut and also your willingness to listen and be empathetic to others kind of guide you into what's going to be next for you. And I, it's really beautiful. I've learned ... I've learned so many things in this conversation and I, I want to have more of them, I hope that people are as inspired as I am to be like, wow, you don't, you don't have to be the most expert person to just be in the room and sit down and like, listen, just and be there.

Bree Gordon 40:34  

And I think another point to mention, too, and I think anyone who's committed to this idea of be it till you see it is aware of it on some level. But that doesn't make this easy (Lesley laughs). Like it was not easy or comfortable for me to be in a room. Again, I look different than everyone else in the room, I'm an outsider in the community, I'm coming in to say I want to help with something that I really have never truly experienced myself. And then in the middle of that, I'm feeling all of these things about myself (Lesley: Right) and my own personal trauma. And the easy thing would have been to run out of that room, never addressed what came up for me and really removed myself from that community. So I became acutely aware of the fact that I had more work to do on me, so that I could show up for others. And there was a choice there. And that's kind of my new like mission with The Mindful Mentor that I'm promoting a lot is that everything we do is a choice. (Lesley: Yeah) These are all just dots, we have to make one choice to connect the dots, and bad choices or dots too, right. So it really determines what image we're going to create from one choice to the other. And so it's not always the easy choice to show up in that way. And to show up as your authentic self. It does require some work, but it's worth it. (Lesley: Yeah) So worth it.

Lesley Logan 41:59  

It's so beautiful. We're gonna find out how we can listen to your podcast and find out more about you?

Bree Gordon 42:05  

Yeah, absolutely. The Mindful Mentor, you can find us on Apple, Spotify, Pandora, or everywhere that you like to listen to your podcasts. And check me out on Instagram @mindfulmentorbree or on Facebook at The Mindful Mentor. Website is mindfulbree.com. Yes, (Lesley: Yeah) that's correct. (Lesley and Bree laughs) And then email is [email protected]

Lesley Logan 42:27  

Amazing, amazing the team we'll put that all in the show notes. It's like really easy click and and just let her know, takeaways and how this felt or just what it brought up for you. What you know, I love that you brought up, it's not easy to be it till you see it. I also think it's not like I think a lot of people could hear your story and think, "Wow, that's gonna be so rewarding to work with people like that and help them do this." But also like, it's really heavy. And and, you know, it's not like you go home every day with a badge that goes, "I helped people today," you know. (Bree: Can I have a cookie now? I helped people today.) Yeah, so um, so I just want to say thank you for being someone who does that. There are people like you in this world who are doing that is amazing work. And it is very necessary because I think so many things that we're all going through is because of trauma unattended, unseen, un untaking care of and I don't know I mean, maybe that's the wrong choice words. I don't know that it gets taken care of, it just becomes something that you understand in your body. And so you can handle ...

Bree Gordon 43:33  

Learn how to cope with it. Yeah, exactly, build that resiliency.

Lesley Logan 43:36  

Yeah, yeah. So anyways, okay. I ask everybody how, what are some be it till you see it tips to prioritize yourself? So (Bree: Yeah) how, like, what do you think it can be one, it could be three, whatever your, what's come up for you?

Bree Gordon 43:50  

Absolutely. Honestly, the first thing that comes to mind for me, and I'm just going to stop at one because it's it's a big one. It's a big one is figure out what lies and this is going to be trauma specific. That's a lot of what we talked about (Lesley: Yeah) today. If you are someone who has experienced a trauma, big T, little T, it's yours. It's your experience. You don't have to compare it to anybody else's. Figure out what your life looks like on the other side of that. This is going to do a couple things for you. Right? It's going to allow you to expand your worldview of not just there's a mountain right in front of me, I'm standing at the base of it. I don't know how to get to the top. I want you to imagine what is on the other side of it before you even take that first step to get over it because you will, you absolutely will and all of that will come in between but just figuring out what life looks like on the other side of that for you. What are you... you can call it whatever you want. You'd like New Year's resolutions you can call it that. Your goals, your aspirations, whatever that looks like for you, but you just have to imagine, it's not that the trauma doesn't exist. But with that, with experience in my life, what does life look like on the other side of it? And then you'll have that encouragement to move through it, to grow through it, because you will, you will get through it, you will go through it. But it's a little less motivating. We can't see how beautiful and sweet life is, once we get to the other side.

Lesley Logan 45:22  

Oh, I think that's so beautiful because it's true. I mean, like, it makes me, I mean I also think like goals, visions, everything. Like, if you can't picture what it's going to be like, it's really hard to go through the hard stuff, because (Bree: Yeah) you're like, "When (Bree: What's the point?) is this gonna end? What (Bree: Right) is the point? Why am I doing this? It was easier just to live through the other way." You know, and it is like going through big T, little T trauma or just going through any goal in general. It's not easy. I don't know who (Bree: Yeah) told you is going to be but it's not. And then you know, but if you know what sweetness is at the end, as you mentioned, it does, it does give you a little bit more drive, it gives you a little bit more incentive, a little bit more reason to take that next step. Yeah.

Bree Gordon 46:07  

And it gives you that that downward slope on the other side of the mountain, the easier side, right. Like, otherwise, you're just still climbing and it's exhausting and it's hard. And part of that climb is involved for sure. But we want to see, we want to see what that that other side when that dreams in sight looks like.

Lesley Logan 46:24  

So beautiful. Bree, thank you so much for being here and sharing your words and your journey. I think it's really inspiring. I'm, yeah, I, amazing. And everyone please listen to The Mindful Mentor podcast. Um, you can, you can start with our episode. So you know, you know the voices, (Bree: Yeah) but then binge out because (Bree: A great initiation) I think you're gonna learn. Yeah, I think you're gonna, I think you're going to be inspired by so many. So grateful for you being here. And I'm grateful for everyone who's listening because because of you podcasters like Bree and I exist, like if no one's listening. We kind of are just talking ... (Lesley laughs)

Bree Gordon 46:58  

We just talk to each other and listen to it and repeat.

Lesley Logan 47:00  

It's like long phone call. (Lesley laughs) Very formal phone call. Anyways, I am so grateful for you. Please do us a favor, screenshot this. Tag us with your takeaways. Tag us with what inspirations came out of this. And you know, even if you just text it to a friend who needs to hear this has had curiosity in that way that is also amazing. But we do love seeing your takeaways, what, what landed for you, and until next time, Be It Till You See It.

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review. And follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcasts. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the @be_it_pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others BE IT TILL YOU SEE IT. Have an awesome day!

'Be It Till You See It' is a production of 'As The Crows Fly Media'.

Brad Crowell 47:58  

It's written produced, filmed and recorded by your host Lesley Logan and me, Brad Crowell. Our Associate Producer is Amanda Frattarelli.

Lesley Logan 48:09  

Kevin Perez at Disenyo handles all of our audio editing.

Brad Crowell 48:13  

Our theme music is by Ali at APEX Production Music. And our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 48:22  

Special thanks to our designer Jaira Mandal for creating all of our visuals (which you can't see because this is a podcast) and our digital producer, Jay Pedroso for editing all video each week so you can.

Brad Crowell 48:34  

And to Angelina Herico for transcribing each of our episodes so you can find them on our website. And, finally to Meridith Crowell for keeping us all on point and on time.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai