Be You Not Them

Welcome to our final mini pick me up episode of the year!!! If you haven't checked out Monday's episode, we took a lovely little walk down memory lane, reflecting on our highs and lows of 2020. In this journey down the yellow brick road, we ask ourselves:

What are YOU looking forward to in 2021?

We'd love to hear what you are looking forward to most and of course, CRUSHING 2021! As always, you can hit us up on the typical channels below! Make sure to subscribe and leave a review as well and AGAIN, we thank you for all your support. We wouldn't be the same crazy tribe without you all. Let's walk into 2021 together, rising up to the challenges and dominating the fears that kept us back in 2020.

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As we close this hellish year, we reflect on the high and lows that defined so much change for both of us including the biggest of them all: STARTING BE YOU NOT THEM. Now for some, this year, despite external circumstances, was bomb diggity and for others, simply, a dumpster fire. In this Baklava Session we invite our listeners to come close this year with some lovely reflecting and share in our walk down memory lane.

[2:37] Shifting Perspectives. Nina begins our podcast with some of the shifts she has had in the way she had defined ambition and success in her life. Both Nat and Nina also share how much focus is placed on work and how much time it actually takes up in our lives.

[5:42] Run Away Anxiety. Nat shares how she realized this year how much her anxiety is NOT under her control with multiple panic attacks...SO FUN,

[7:30] Proud Moments. We shine a little light on each other in how friggin proud we are of the growth both of us have achieved ranging from the vulnerability that Nat has shared thus far to the growth in emotional intelligence in Nina.

[9:52] Nina's faith journey. Nina highlights the second growth moment of her 2020 journey which was her deepening her faith. In doing so, she was able to see where her hope lies and areas where her own identity is rooted.

[12:47] Start the Damn Youtube Channel. Given that the fatigue from her commute no longer became a thing (#workremotelife), Nat shared how the extra time helped her start a Youtube Channel which she has wanted to do for a while. No mo excuses.

[18:20] Checking Out Your Backyard. Nina highlights that as a plus in this pandemic is getting to know what is in your community through those lovely neighborhood walks that keep us sane from the work at home life. Nat explains how this also shows that connection with others virtually is just not enough.

[22:49] Let Us Not Forget Our BYNT Launch. Yes, we need to shine a big ass light on this moment of us launching this wonderful podcast. It has been a dream for us to do this and THANK YOU for being a part of this journey.

[25:00] The 2020 Lows. We share the depths of what we struggled from anxiety to deep depression. Listen to what led to Nina choosing to go sober for this year and Nat sharing the fact that we as humans are resilient.

THANK YOU

BYNT would not be where it is today without all of your support! We truly want to take moment and thank our listeners for putting up with our craziness. We love you and hoped this year, BYNT put a little sparkle in your life as your own stories put a sparkle in ours. Cheers to this crazy journey and we cannot wait what will be in store from BYNT and our lovely thrive tribe!

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Let's close out this year with a bang <3

Baklava,

Nat & Nina

Releasing this little Mini Pick Me Up right before the holidays, just to remind ourselves how we can deal with Loneliness, which was the main topic of Episode #36. You should definitely go check that episode out if you haven't yet, especially if you have been feeling a little alone.

This weeks question is:

What is something you do to combat feelings of loneliness?

We both share different ways that have helped us cope with feelings of loneliness, from Natassia focusing on gratitude while in the midst of a panic attack to Nina reflecting on her faith.

We hope this weeks episodes can help you feel a little less alone. Remember, you ARE loved. As always, you can hit us up on the typical channels below! Make sure to subscribe and leave a review as well. We would really appreciate it!

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A SYMPTOM OF SOMETHING DEEPER. Yikes. This one may be much needed for a lot of us. Have you ever felt really lonely? Yep. Especially in a year like 2020 when a lot of us are distant and disconnected from others, loneliness can creep up on you and make you feel much more isolated than you really are. We're going to talk a little bit about our experiences WHY we tend to feel lonely sometimes… even when we can be in a room surrounded by people.

[1:35] Let's Start Out With Some STATS on Loneliness. These are a little eye-opening.

• Sharing a passage from "Braving the Wilderness" by Brene Brown. Living with loneliness increases our risk of dying early by over 40%... excuse me?!
• Dr. Vivek Murthy shared that in his research up to 22% of adults in America are affected by loneliness.

[5:00] What is Loneliness and How Would We Describe It?

• Perceived socially isolated
• Feeling disconnected
• Lacking sense of true belonging
• Pushed outside of a group we value

[6:50] The Different Types Of Loneliness. In Dr. Vivek Murthy's book "Together", he explains how there are many different facets of loneliness that people may experience.

• Intimate & Emotional: need for a close confident
• Relation & Social: quality of friendships
• Collective: network or group that share your purpose

[13:00] Loneliness vs. Being Alone: Lets define what being alone means… and how it is very different from just being alone.

[14:58] What drives us to feel this way?

• FEAR paralyzes us from connecting with others
• Lack of connection with ourselves.

[17:55] How Do We Combat Loneliness? We're sharing a few tips on how to feel a little less lonely. What can we do to connect and make ourselves feel better?

• Identify the root of the cause. Is it lack of depth in friendships? Low self-worth?
• Learn to treat signs of loneliness as a Warning Sign.
• Connecting with ourselves first... are you doing something that makes you happy? Sit with your feelings.
• Being vulnerable. Don't be afraid to have tough conversations.Vulnerability can open up deeper connections with others.
• Choosing courage over comfort. Think outside of ourselves.

Of course, we're going to close out with a beautiful passage by Maya Angelou, to remind you all that you are NOT alone. If you're feeling a little lonely, we hope this episode made you feel a little less alone.

Books/Articles Mentioned:

• "Together: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World" by Vivek Murthy
• "Braving the Wilderness" by Brené Brown
• NPR Interview with Vivek Murthy https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/05/11/853308193/in-together-former-surgeon-general-writes-about-importance-of-human-connection

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Sending much love <3

Baklava,

Nat & Nina

Welcome to this week's mini pick me up episode! If you haven't checked out Monday's episode, we challenged our listeners to EMBRACE change and think of why we may fear it. We also dropped the fun little fact that there is an actual phobia for fearing change. With that in mind, we ask ourselves this week:

What was a change in your life that was so impactful that it redirected you completely?

We'd love to hear these lovely changes, whether big or small! As always, you can hit us up on the typical channels below! Make sure to subscribe and leave a review as well. We would really appreciate it!

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Why does change stir up such fear, nervousness & hesitancy in us? A new job, a big move, even the decision to travel solo...all these events may give us a mini breakdown because of our lovely frenemy, FEAR. It is this fear that makes us question the change we are thinking about or stop us in our tracks of taking that action for change. Today, we want to change that. We want to have change be EMBRACED, like a little hand hug...awkward but cute.

[1:32] Adversity to Change. We dive right into calling out how change is viewed in such a negative light with fear, failure and uncertainty. Sometimes we receive this negativity from the people who counsel us the most. The moment we accept change, is when we become free from this negativity.

[4:32] Predicting the Outcome. Oooo how this reigns so true for many of us that when a new situation arises we don't know how it is going to play out and therefore, we tread SOOOO lightly. Our thoughts just swarm with all the potential scenarios of that outcome...the "what ifs" and instead of embracing that moment, we just continuously plan on how to mitigate the outcome if it is negative.

[6:16] Impermanence of Life. Natassia brings up a good point in asking if the reason why people fear change is because of how it highlights the impermanence of life.

[7:24] WTF is Metathesiophobia? Yes, we really struggled pronouncing this one but the fear of change is an actual phobia. We not only give the scientific def of this phobia but also present data on it connecting it to different types of mindset, focusing on the following:

• Fatalist Mindset: Everything is out of your own hands
• Divine Mindset: "It is never the right time"

[10:12] Anthro View. And no, we don't mean the store, Anthrolpologie...Natassia brings in another unique perspective from the anthropology/archeology realm about how the flight or fight response conditioned us to stay safe within our circles. Of course, Nina enjoyed this POV, our lovely little archeology nerd.

[11:34] Our Own Change Paralysis. We both share experiences where we may have felt like we couldn't move forward with a change because of fear and how we overcame that

[15:32] WAKE-UP CALL. We wanted to give all of you a friendly little wake-up call and that is: the fear of change can severely limit you in so many aspects of your life from career to relationships. Don't let it stop you in your tracks.

[16:30] Tips on Embracing Change. We offer the following little nuggets to help get over that change paralysis:

• Acknowledge your fear and question it [21:14]
• It's normal to feel scared about new things [22:35]
• Where will self doubt get you? Think of what your future self will think [23:23]
• If it doesn't work out...guess what? You can CHANGE your situation [28:09]

You have the power of choice and that is something beautiful so EMBRACE it!

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Baklava,

Nat & Nina

Welcome to your mini pick me up! This week, our question will highlight what we discussed in episode #34, where we talked about our hilarious (and cringeworthy) dating experiences in our 20s. We laughed a lot and realized how far we've come after each experience. So, tying in to the topic of our last episode, today's question is...

What dating advice would you give your 20 year old self?

What is YOUR answer to this weeks question? We'd love to know what you've learned through your dating experiences as well... we can't be the only ones with cringeworthy moments!

Thanks so much for listening and for your support!

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It's time for another FUNNY Baklava Session. We cringed a lot recording this one, guys. We discuss all of our hilarious dating mishaps from our 20s. There are moments that made us see red, that made us shocked... and others that made us say, "WTF?"

We each share some cringeworthy moments from our 20s. Here are some of our favorite highlights (you'll have to listen to know more!):

• Nina had the entirety of "Lean on Me" whispered in her ear while trying to sleep.
• Natassia had an admirer who left a voicemail saying he wanted to lick her eyes (simmer down, Hannibal Lecter)
• We both briefly dated some sketchy guys who ended up being cheaters
• The double date from hell that Nina dragged Natassia to (No Nina, I'll never forget!)

... And that's only some of it! Let us know which story resonated with you the most. We'd love to hear your funny dating stories as well. We can't be the only ones with embarrassing dating experiences from our 20s! You know where to find us ;)

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Lean on me, when you're not strong... that song is forever ruined.

Nina & Nat

Welcome to your mini pick me up! This week, our question will highlight what we discussed in Monday's episode which was all about us challenging those lovely social norms for us women to follow. We also shared our own experiences with these norms and how we broke away from them.

Our question for this week is: What was an expectation you thought you had to meet? And how did you realize it was BS?

We'd love to hear your some of those expectations you smashed! As always, you can hit us up on the typical channels below! Make sure to subscribe and leave a review as well. We would really appreciate it!

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Ever feel like your biological tock is ticking? Or perhaps feel that for your age, you are not where you need to be in your career? First off, who defines these norms for us and second, why do we need to abide to them? In this week's episode, we go through the all the lovely norms that society tells us women to follow and challenge the hell outta them. Get ready because we ain't holding back here.

[2:01] Early Wedding Bells. Marriage looks different for EVERYONE but one thing that we discuss is the pressure to get married in our 20s. Nina shares how this made her marriage obsessed and when entering her 30s as single lady, she felt she was doing something wrong.

[5:28] Babies before 30. We have all heard this one before, especially when we enter our 30s, about our lovely biological clock. We share those awkward moments when asked if we have kids...that is always fun.

[11:02] Career Milestones. We all have a set goals to either make CEO, partner or have our own business at a certain time in our lives but we remind our listeners that sometimes things don't go exactly to plan. Natassia shares how she used to compare herself to others around her age to gage where she needed to be in her career.

[14:14] Idea of Independence. As a society, we equate success with independence such as being financially independent, living on your own, buying your things, etc. Nina shares how she is redefining success in this area of her life with her move back home to Florida.

[18:54] Forever Young. We discuss how there is an emphasis on staying young & beautiful as we get older and how we fear being invisible as the years fly by. Natassia shares a little golden nugget she learned from Ben on how getting older is a privilege and blessing.

[22:22] Household Power Dynamics. We address a variety of topics within this norm and how each of our own cultures set up the expectations of these dynamics. These topics include:

• Role of Housekeeping & House Management
• Stay at home mom vs Working mom
• Role of the women in the family and relationships

It is only natural for us to say that the simple takeaway from all of this is BE YOU, not what others have defined for you.

Baklava,

Nat & Nina

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