Soul-Shaking Love

Becoming Securely Loved


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Attachment styles are everywhere these days—but what do they really mean for our relationships? Understanding your attachment style is the first step to healing patterns that keep love at arm’s length. When we learn how to cultivate secure attachment, we unlock the ability to create deeper, more lasting connections—starting with ourselves.

That’s why I decided to interview Relationship and attachment trauma Practitioner Bev Mitelman about BECOMING Securely Loved. She, like I, grew up in an environment that fostered disorganized attachment and dedicated herself to learning the skills to heal, grow, and create secure love. Our conversation is a deep dive into attachment styles, how they form, how they look and how you can develop more self awareness that leads to secure love. 

Here’s what we cover in our interview: 

What are attachment styles are and how do they impact our romantic relationships?

How does our childhood play a role in developing our attachment style?

How does being securely attached in your relationship with yourself set the foundation for healthier relationships with others?

Can you change your attachment style?

What are the beliefs and skills of securely vs. insecurely attached people?

Here’s Bev’s Free attachment style quiz!

https://securelyloved.com/attachment-quiz

More about Bev Mitelman: 

As a child, Bev lived in a very unpredictable and chaotic environment where she never knew if she could rely on her parents to meet her emotional needs. This led her to absorb unhealthy relationship ideas based on what she was witnessing: she believed relationships were supposed to be unbalanced, uncertain, and overall chaotic. If you have an insecure attachment style, you probably relate to her experience, and navigating relationships can be particularly difficult for you.  

Prior to becoming a Certified Attachment Practitioner and founding Securely Loved, Bev was an Executive Leader, University Lecturer and published author, having obtained her Masters' Degree in 2006. She has dedicated her entire career (25+ years) working with adults in the realm of personal growth and professional development.

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Soul-Shaking LoveBy Valerie Greene

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