Ever feel drained, confused, or like you don’t even exist in a relationship? You might be interacting with a narcissist—overt or covert—and not even realize it. In this episode, we will explore how to spot the red flags and understand the psychological defenses driving these behaviors. It’s time to reclaim your clarity, your power, and your peace of mind.

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

Do you ever catch yourself withdrawing, lashing out, or dismissing someone you love when they don’t meet your expectations—and then wonder if it means you’re selfish, manipulative, or even “narcissistic”? In this episode we go beneath the surface of those labels to explore the unconscious patterns that drive these destructive behaviors. 

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

Does your partner ever humiliate you in a way that makes you wonder—do they actually enjoy my pain?
Have you caught yourself lashing out, withdrawing, or dismissing someone you love… and then regretting it later?
Is the cruelty you feel in these moments really about sadism—or could something deeper be going on beneath the surface?

In this episode we dive into one of the most painful questions people ask: Why does the narcissist humiliate, devalue, and discard? 

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

Warning- this is a deep dive into unconscious processes  

Why do you keep repeating the same destructive patterns, even when you finally have something good—a loving partner, a promotion at work, or even just care and attention? In this episode, we explore the hidden forces that make receiving goodness feel threatening, from envy and shame to the fear of humiliation. Using real-life examples, we uncover why people unconsciously push away what they long for and how small moments of care can trigger destructive reactions. If you’ve ever wondered why you self-sabotage, this episode will show you what’s really going on beneath the surface.

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

In this episode, we uncover how covert narcissistic parents quietly take over their children’s choices through guilt, victimhood, and subtle emotional control. You’ll learn how these hidden dynamics can unconsciously follow you into adult relationships, shape your inner voice, and most importantly what it takes to start reclaiming your independence.

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

In this episode, we uncover how covert narcissism can quietly hijack your choices. What happens when a parent’s tears, guilt, or subtle manipulations make independence feel like betrayal? Through a powerful clinical example, we reveal the hidden inner logic that keeps adult children bound to their parent’s needs—and why separating isn’t just about moving out, but breaking free on an inner level.

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

In this episode, we take a deep dive into the psychic world of narcissistic emptiness — why everyday tasks can feel overwhelming, how withdrawal serves as a protective defense, and why shutting down can feel safer than engaging. Tune in to discover how small moments of engagement can be fostered to help shift a life overshadowed by withdrawal toward meaningful connection and authentic presence 

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

In this episode we dive into one of the most hidden struggles of healing from narcissism: why success doesn’t always feel like success. What if every new achievement, every step forward, only brings dread instead of relief? Together, we explore the deeper truth behind this paradox—the way grandiose fantasies once acted as armor against unbearable shame, fear of exposure, and early wounds of not being “enough.” Through a powerful clinical example, we uncover the heart of the narcissistic bind: the longing to be truly seen, and the terror of being exposed. This conversation gets to the core of what it really means to heal—not by chasing perfection, but by learning to live with vulnerability, complexity, and authentic selfhood.

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

In Part 2 of this conversation, we move from identifying narcissistic traits in a boss to navigating the complex relationship without losing yourself. Merry Brown raises the question so many people are afraid to ask: How do I get my narcissistic boss to meet expectations without abandoning my own boundaries and sanity? We explore the importance of mental differentiation and I unpack how narcissistic leaders often draw others into subtle “relational enactments.” If you’ve ever felt pulled in, worn down, or confused by a leader who leaves you doubting yourself, this episode offers clarity—and a way through.

 

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com

Is My Partner a Narcissist? When You’re Blamed, Erased, or Treated Like the Enemy

 In this special 100th episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on  a  moment from one of my new Office Hours sessions — a space where listeners bring real-life stories of complex, often painful relationship dynamics. You’ll hear a raw example from someone questioning whether their spouse is narcissistic, and I’ll walk you through my psychodynamic take: not only how to recognize the patterns at play, but also why people — sometimes without even realizing it — slip into dismissive or emotionally abusive behavior. Together, we’ll explore the enactments and  defense mechanisms that fuel these destructive cycles, offering clarity, compassion, and a deeper understanding for anyone navigating the emotional confusion of a narcissistic relationship. 

If you are interested in a consultation or seeking virtual therapy services, Dr. Mazzella is accepting new patients. Please click here for more detailed information.

Want to go deeper? Join me in Office Hours — an open space where we explore psychoanalytic ideas together, answer your questions, and connect theory to real life experiences. Reserve your spot here

Next Meeting: October is Full - stayed tuned for our next meeting

For more information about Dr. Mazzella’s psychoanalytic affiliations and membership in The International Psychoanalytic Association (IPA) -which is restricted to psychoanalysts who fulfill the most recognized international standards for psychoanalytic training- please click here

You can follow The Narcissism Decoder on:

https://www.instagram.com/thenarcissism.decoder/

https://www.tiktok.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

https://www.youtube.com/@thenarcissismdecoder

Dr. Mazzella’s personal website: drmazzella.com