What if our obsession with “boundaries” is actually making us lonelier? In this episode of Do Tell, Nina sits down with psychotherapist Helen Marie to unpack modern boundary culture, co-regulation, attachment, PTSD showing up around the holidays, and the healing power of rupture and repair. They explore the difference between capacity vs. desire in love, why love languages can mislead us, and a simple nervous system reset you can use anywhere (hand-on-chest ventral vagal cue).

Whether you’re a parent navigating the 0–7 window, a partner hoping to be seen, or someone heading into tricky family dynamics, this conversation is a gentle, practical roadmap back to connection.

What you’ll learn

• How therapists think through “walk away vs. walk through it” moments

• Why boundaries ≠ rigid rules (and what to do instead)

• A simple somatic regulation technique to exit fight/flight or shutdown

• How to spot capacity limits (even when desire is high)

• Why repair matters more than perfection in parenting & partnership

• Co-regulation and community as antidotes to isolation

Key topics & keywords psychotherapy, marriage & family therapy, boundaries, co-regulation, polyvagal ladder, ventral vagal, PTSD triggers, holidays & family, attachment styles, rupture and repair, capacity vs desire, love languages critique, parenting 0–7, nervous system regulation, relationship communication