Breaking the Silence

A sponsor is someone who can share their own experience of recovery through the 12 Steps and can offer hope, encouragement, accountability, and feedback. If someone knows about good sponsor relationships, it’s Steven Croshaw. After struggling with a sex addiction for decades, he turned to a 12-step program to work towards recovery. Through this experience, he learned how to create a supportive situation with a sponsor or sponsee for a healthy relationship that works. 

In this episode: 

• Working through recovery is easier with someone who has success working through the steps.
• We need to learn how to surrender our will to God.
• God will recognize our desires if we are willing to move our feet.

Links: 

• Instagram: @salifelinefoundation
• Facebook: SA Lifeline Foundation
• salifeline.org
• sal12step.org

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.

It’s no secret. Shame often follows pornography even if you aren’t the user, especially in relationships. What are people thinking? Rhyll Crowshaw experienced this when her husband came to her with a sex addiction, and she had to decide how to move forward in their relationship. She discusses how to dispel the fear and shame that comes when worrying about others’ judgments, and work through betrayal trauma when a partner is struggling. 

In this episode: 

• Pornography addiction is traumatizing to a partner because it is a form of rejection.
• Work towards being trustworthy and trusting another person. 
• There has to be a spiritual connection to find recovery. 
• Healing looks like courage, confidence, faith, peace, and serenity.

Links: 

• Instagram: @salifelinefoundation
• Facebook: SA Lifeline Foundation
• salifeline.org
• sal12step.org

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.

Talking about pornography and sex can be awkward, shameful, and even scary. In fact, many of us were taught that the best way to deal with it was to avoid the subject completely. So it’s not only users, but parents, spouses, and friends who hide from confronting the issue of pornography. Brigham Elton is a certified pornography and sexual addiction counselor. Listen as he shares the benefits of talking about sex and pornography with kids, friends, and your spouse. Let’s come out of hiding and face it together. 

In this episode: 

• Hiding is motivated by fear of many kinds.
• We hide how we really feel if we’re discouraged, sad, or hurt about it and why.
• Ask someone you are seriously dating about their values surrounding sex and their history regarding pornography.
• If we change our view of sex, pornography becomes less appealing. 

Links:

• Brigham Elton’s website: True-connections.org
• Instagram: @tc.rebootandrise
• @trueconnectionslds

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast. 

Kids hire pornography for a variety of jobs to help them grow up, and the surprising thing is it makes sense. Creed and Crishelle talk with Kristen Jenson, author of Good Pictures Bad Pictures and founder of Protect Young minds, about this unusual way of understanding kids. She did a study with 10 young people who had a history of porn use. They found 4 categories of jobs that kids hired porn to do:

1. Knowledge about sex
2. Escaping from stressful emotions
3. Normalizing sexual abuse
4. Rebelling in a safe way

In this episode: 

• Kids need to learn how to be adults and they’re trying to make progress and grow up. 
• Talk with kids earlier than you think and teach them to manage their emotions. 

Links:

• Website/Books: www.protectyoungminds.org/books
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ProtectYM/
• Instagram: @protectyoungminds
• Twitter: @protectYM

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast. 

It’s easy to get sucked into your phone, tv shows, or video games and forget who you are and what you really want out of life. Jason and Lisa Frost, young authors of a new book, talk with Creed and Crishelle about being intentional with media and living from your values. We should be angry instead of ashamed about screen culture and the big tech companies setting traps to steal our attention. They suggest that taking a break away from screens is worth it for the healthy benefits. 

In this episode: 

• Pornography is one of the ways tech tries to capture time and attention for big money
• Find time to have a digital break and reset 
• Take time to think about your values 

Links: 

• The Glass Between Us, Empowering Youth to Combat Digital Exploitation, A Value-Based Guide for Screen-Driven Challenges
• [email protected]
• [email protected]
• Website: Wiredhuman.org
• Facebook: @wearewiredhuman
• Instagram: @wearewiredhuman
• Twitter: @wearewiredhuman

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast. 

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing) is a fascinating and effective therapy treatment that shifts stored memories and helps people not be so triggered by past trauma. It relieves emotional distress and calms the physical response to past memories. Our guest, Amanda Christenson is a therapist trained in EMDR. Listen in as Creed and Crishelle learn from her about how this form of therapy can relieve shame reactions and help individuals and couples overcome pornography.

In this episode: 

• Being stuck in a compulsive behavior like pornography can cause trauma
• EMDR can help couples no matter where they are at in recovery 
• This therapy can help with self-compassion

Links:

• Amanda’s Instagram - @amandachristensonmft
• Hope Therapy website

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.

We all want to have connection in our marriage, especially when we struggle. Zach and Darcy Spafford discuss how to pause and step back to connect when pornography comes in between them. They also share the importance of compassion and grace towards themselves and each other in the process.

In this episode:

• Each person can work for compassion for what the other is feeling.
• Ask about emotions rather than defending your behavior.
• Intimacy grows when problems are tackled together.
• Recovery requires actual skills. 
• The unending compassion of Christ.

Links:

• Zach Spafford, Self Mastery Coach website
• email: [email protected]
• Instagram @zachspafford.selfmasterycoach
• The Self Mastery Podcast

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast. 

Watching a spouse work through recovery can be tough. Darcy Spafford experienced this when her husband, Zach, struggled with pornography. She shares how she separated herself from his actions and learned to have compassion for him and for herself. It helped to question the thoughts that popped up and decide if they’re really true. 

In this episode:

• Realizing how we’re the same; we may sin differently but we all struggle with something
• Support your spouse by allowing them to express their emotions
• Trying to control your spouse isn’t the answer

Links:

• Zach Spafford, Self Mastery Coach website
• email: [email protected]
• Instagram @zachspafford.selfmasterycoach
• The Self Mastery Podcast

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast. 

When struggling with something as difficult as pornography, it can be easy to feel like you no longer have a choice in your actions. But coach Zachary Spafford says taking responsibility for your decisions can lead to a whole new perspective that helps in recovery. Creed and Crishelle talk with Zach about his own journey to recovery and how changing your thoughts makes the road easier. 

In this episode:

• We have to have the capacity to choose.
• Own your agency.
• Agency is how we bring ourselves in alignment with God’s will.
• When we say we can’t do something, we abdicate our agency.

Links:
Zach Spafford, Self Mastery Coach website
email: [email protected]
Instagram @zachspafford.selfmasterycoach
The Self Mastery Podcast
Jody Moore Better Than Happy Podcast

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast. 

Many young adults didn’t grow up with sexuality as a frequent topic in their homes. Join Creed and Crishelle as they chat with Lucy Ferguson about their lack of sex education as youth and how to learn more about healthy sexuality as you prepare for marriage. "Ignorance is bliss" does NOT apply to sex education. Bliss in healthy sexuality comes from being educated. It’s never too late to learn more!

In this episode: 

• Advocate for better sex education.
• Take charge of your sexual health. Your experience depends on your preparation.
• God wants us to enjoy sexuality in marriage. 

Show Notes:  

• Submit anonymous questions, stories, or comments here.
• Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for more!
• Contact us at [email protected].
• Learn more about our nonprofit at Reach 10.

Disclaimer: The views expressed by guests do not necessarily represent our views. We offer this information in good faith, but we don’t make any representation that what you hear is accurate, reliable, or complete. Reach 10 and the Breaking the Silence podcast are not responsible or liable for your use of any information heard in this podcast.