Brides of Frankenstein

Welcome to the Losers Club! This week, the Brides head to Derry, Maine, to talk all about 2017's It Chapter One. Topics covered in this episode include: why this Stephen King adaptation works as opposed to Children of the Corn, the pitch perfect casting for the Losers, the tendency of director Andy Muschietti to go HUGE with set pieces and imagery, Henry Bowers' truly scary mullet, and the infuriating fact that a lot of the best lines of the film were improvised by 12 year olds (seriously, these kids have NO RIGHT to be this good). We also critique the various changes from book to screen, and confess which one of us is, in real life, truly freaked out by clowns. This episode is long, because man, there's a lot to cover in this film - and it's just part one! 

Note: This podcast episode contains reference to molestation by a parent. Take care of yourselves, friends! 

It: Chapter One. 2017. Directed by Andy Muschietti. Starring Bill Skarsgard, Jaeden Martell, Finn Wolfhard, Sophia Lillis, Wyatt Oleff, Jeremy Raymond Taylor, Jack Dylan Grazer, and Chosen Jacobs.

The Brides are back for season 2! This week, we get lost in Gatlin, Nebraska, and try to make even a little bit of sense out of the 1984 adaptation of Stephen King's Children of the Corn. Over the course of a purely chaotic hour we wonder who put Linda Hamilton in those unforgivable khakis, pick at the plot strands that go absolutely nowhere, and marvel at the clearly 35 year old 'stunt chest' in the church scene. Also, did you know that this film was supposed to be a metaphor for the Iranian revolution? Because we definitely didn't! Let's be honest - this movie is trash, but man, did we have fun trashing it. Here's to season 2, and better movies to come! 

Children of the Corn. 1984. Directed by Fritz Kiersch. Written by George Goldsmith. Starring Peter Horton, Linda Hamilton, John Franklin, and Courtney Gains

On this, our Season 1 finale, the Brides of Frankenstein celebrate Lindsay's birthday mandate with one of her favorite films, Wes Craven's Scream! We rave about the brilliance of the opening scene, the genius, bordering-on-unhinged performance of Matthew Lillard, the way the characters talk and how it mirrored the way we all thought we sounded as kids (which we did NOT), and how the costumer for Courtney Cox definitely wanted to make her look like a stick of gum. We also confirm, once and for all, that Billy Loomis is in fact the the creepiest, grossest horror movie boyfriend ever put to celluloid. Other questions we ponder: how 90s is this soundtrack? Why does this movie succeed when so many imitators fail? And man, how much BS did Wes Craven have to go through to make this damn movie? 

FYI: This is the longest episode we've done so far; we brought some CHAOTIC Stu-level energy to recording, along with the dumbest blooper we've ever done on the show. You have been warned. 

The Brides wish you all HAPPY HOLIDAYS, and we'll see you in January 2021 for a whole new season of spooks and silliness! 

FYI, this episode contains discussion of rape, assault, and the 1999 Columbine school shooting. Take care of yourselves, kiddos!

Scream, 1996. Directed by Wes Craven. Written by Kevin Williamson. Starring Neve Campbell, Courtney Cox, Skeet Ulrich, Matthew Lillard, Rose McGowan, David Arquette, Drew Barrymore, and Henry Winkler.

This week, the Brides open Lemarchand's puzzle box and experience the limits of pleasure and pain as we explore Clive Barker's landmark 1987 bondage-fueled horrorscape Hellraiser. Along the way, we ask the truly important questions: Is this the horniest movie we'll ever cover? Did the term 'milquetoast' get invented for the character of Larry? Is any sexual experience worth what Julia does in this movie, but particularly, for a sleazeball like Frank? We also touch on the film's status as a queer artifact, the representation of healthy BDSM in media, and Alysa subjects Lindsay to readings from The Hellbound Heart, the novella upon which Hellraiser is based. Warning: contains 'well muscled buttocks.'

Hellraiser, 1987. Directed and written by Clive Barker. Starring Doug Bradley, Clare Higgins, Andrew Robinson, Ashley Laurence, and Sean Chapman. 

This week, the Brides celebrate the restoration of democracy to America by gleefully dissecting James Wan's 2013 demon-possessed masterpiece, The Conjuring.  How is this movie still so terrifying, even after multiple rewatches? We also ponder why the actual Annabelle doll is in fact scarier than the Victorian demon toy in the film, and what made Ed and Lorraine Warren so utterly compelling as two of America's most famous paranormal experts - and the piles of evidence that suggests they weren't very helpful in their most famous cases. Then, Lindsay and Alysa share their mutual long-term love of musical theatre legend Patrick Wilson, and everything sort of goes downhill from there. We aren't sorry.

The Conjuring, 2013. Directed by James Wan. Starring Vera Farmiga, Patrick Wilson, Lilli Taylor, Ron Livingston, and Joey King. 

Other stuff mentioned in this episode: The Full Monty musical, Angels in America, Brigadoon, Robert the Doll, The Amityville Haunting, the Enfield Poltergeist. 

On this special 'live commentary' episode, the Brides watch the 2007 classic anthology Trick r Treat! Join us as we talk over this wonderful film that encapsulates some of the best things about this holiday. How terrifyingly adorable is Sam? How come nobody knows the rules of Halloween? Is the Brian Cox set-piece just a little too long? Is this the best werewolf storyline ever put on film? We also take note of the ways this film has not aged very well, particularly with Ronda and the way movies make neuro-divergent people into supernatural magicians. Also, we at Brides of Frankenstein would like to remind you all to VOTE!!!! Happy Halloween, and remember - you can still dress up and be spooky while social distancing! 

Trick R Treat. 2007. Directed by Michael Dougherty. Starring Brian Cox, Dylan Baker, Leslie Bibb, Anna Paquin.

The ooky-spooky season continues! This week the Brides head on back to Haddonfield to discuss the better-than-it-has-any-right-to-be 2018 sequel to Halloween, also titled Halloween! We explain how the script retcons everything past the original film AND nails Laurie Strode's trauma, and generally wax rhapsodic about Judy Greer's genius. We also bemoan the  crazy amount of true crime podcasters that woobify genuinely unredeemable monsters (with some examples of true crime docs that get it absolutely right). And for the first time, the Brides have the same palate cleanser! It's a Halloween miracle!

BONUS: you get TWO bloopers this episode!

Halloween (2018), directed by David Gordon Green. Written by David Gordon Green, Danny McBride, and Jeff Fradley. Produced by Malek Akkad, Jason Blum, and Bill Block. Starring Jamie Lee Curtis, Judy Greer, Ali Matichak, James Jude Courtney, Nick Castle, and Nihat Bilginer. 

Also discussed in this episode: Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile, American Murder: The Family Next Door, The Ted Bundy Tapes. All available on Netflix.

It's the most wonderful time of the year! To celebrate the ooky-spooky season, the Brides are coming at you with THREE episodes this month! And we we had to start with a trip to Haddonfield. That's right, today we're celebrating the Daddy of slasher pics, John Carpenter's Halloween! We discuss what makes this movie so good (a holy combination of acting, directing, and Debra Hill), how every victim in this film is totally likable, the ways Carpenter honors the pagan roots of Halloween in his storytelling aesthetic, and why the Rob Zombie 2007 remake ruins what makes The Shape so scary. Plus, did they really think they would get away with having Pasadena, CA, stand in for late-autumn Illinois, and does it really matter? Because this movie is AWESOME.

Halloween, 1978. Directed by John Carpenter. Written by John Carpenter and Debra Hill. Starring Jamie Lee Curtis, Donald Pleasance, Nick Castle, PJ Soles, and Nancy Kyes.  

"It's just a sea of butts." This week is Alysa's birthday, so she picks the movie - no vetoes allowed. The Brides head to Ipswich, MA, and attempt to make sense of the 2006 Renny Harlin bro-d out witchcraft movie, The Covenant. Did anybody know how homoerotic this was going to turn out? Why does this movie sound like a drug PSA but with witches? Does the director know any human women? Why is the movie shot through a blue iPhone filter? Why is the mom quasi-hitting on the son? What makes a movie good-bad, or bad-bad? Also, we delight in the fact that this movie was the jumping off point for a bunch of respected careers, specifically Sebastian Stan and Taylor Kitsch. We end on our final recommendations (or lack thereof) and some fun palate cleansers! 

The Covenant, directed by Renny Harlin. Starring Steven Strait, Taylor Kitsch, Chace Crawford, Sebastian Stan, and Toby Hemingway.