BS with Brian Simpson

On this episode of BS with Brian Simpson:

0:00 cold open

0:24 whipping boys

2:20 Israel vs. Hamas

13:08 belated introductions

14:48 Microsoft acquisition

23:48 23 and me data leak

29:02 email: mixed family paternity

32:42 email: sexually incompatible

39:28 email: Hannibal hotness

42:03 email: writing jokes for friends

48:31 model embryos

55:51 going to mars

VOICEMAIL: Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Thanks to Griff Parker for this week’s music track, “Wet Bottle”! If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

SPONSORED BY SHEATH:

Support the show and get 20% off your first order with code "BS" at https://www.sheathunderwear.com

*****

On this episode of BS with Brian Simpson:

0:00 Intro

1:57 World War 3?

15:12 Nepo Babies as Diplomats

16:00 The Fall of Civilizations

18:45 Sheath Ad

20:06 Bastards!

23:20 Dating advice (women ghosting)

31:00 tr@nsmaxxing and red pills

33:40 N@zis in Canada

36:30 Odyssey review

41:40 Career choices and making more money

50:30 Man arrested for murder of Tupac

57:10 never talk to cops

1:00:57 Air BnB tenant from hell

VOICEMAIL: Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Thanks to Griff Parker for this week’s music track, “Candy Bars”! If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

***SPONSORS***

FACTOR:

Get 50% off of Factor and support the show at https://www.factormeals.com BS50 and use code BS50

*****

Brian is sick as sh*t but f*ck it we ball.

On this episode of BS with Brian Simpson:

0:00 Cold Open

0:38 Skankfest

2:30 Vegas sucks

4:15 Mandatory Paternity Tests

19:11 Factor Ad

20:15 Should you reveal paternity?

26:30 what do you get out of marriage?

30:15 Friends with benefits

35:26 Reparations

40:00 dead dolphins

43:00 Times Square hate

45:00 Fremont Street busking

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get access to EXCLUSIVE content every week!

NOTE: the Patreon is on hold while we finish setting up the new studio.

VOICEMAIL: Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Thanks to Griff Parker for this week’s music track, “Wet Bottle”!

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

***SPONSORS***

SHEATH:

Support the show and get 20% off your first order with code BS at https://www.sheathunderwear.com

DOORDASH:

Support the show and get 50% off your first DoorDash order up to a $20 value. Just download the DoorDash app and use code BS

*****

Brian's between studios this week, so we're bringing you a (mostly) audio-only episode!

On this week's episode:

- Listener email: Army man in Japan, escaping the rat race, and taking a second look at Umar Johnson

- Rat lungworms are infecting Atlanta

- Poll finds that "listening to Joe Rogan" is a turnoff

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get access to EXCLUSIVE content every week! NOTE: the Patreon is on hold while we finish setting up the new studio.

VOICEMAIL: Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

SPONSORED BY FACTOR:

Support the show and get 50% off of Factor at https://www.factormeals.com/BS50 with code BS50

*****

On this week's episode:

- Russell Brand gets got

- Hasan Minhaj's "emotional truths"

- Never call the cops

- Brian doesn't like FPS video games

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get access to EXCLUSIVE content every week!

VOICEMAIL: Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

SPONSORS:

SHEATH: Support the show and get 20% off your 1st order with code BS at https://www.sheathunderwear.com

DRAFTKINGS: Support the podcast & download the DraftKings Sportsbook app. New customers can bet just $5 & take home $200 instantly in bonus bets. Use code BS to sign up.

*****

On this week's episode:

- Earthquake in Morocco

- Collapse of the Bronze Age

- Apocalyptic fiction

- Hypocrisy in the age of CØV!D

- Listener emails

- Brian's not a fan of music festivals :(

- Black History: Marcus Garvey

BS with Brian Simpson now has a PATREON!

On this week's minisode: "Leroy Hood Wants To Show You How To Live for a Really, Really Long Time"

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get EXCLUSIVE MINISODES every week!

Hit up the Patreon for a free trial and get exclusive access to ALL the minisodes, plus ad-free episodes.

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Thank you to our producer Josh Cabaza and to Comedy Frequency.

***

We have a VOICEMAIL now! Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Check out comedyfrequency.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

SPONSORS:

FACTOR: Support the show and get 50% off Factor at https://www.factormeals.com/BS50 by using code BS50

DRAFTKINGS: New customers can get $200 in bonus bets instantly when you bet just 5 bucks on any NFL game. Download the

DraftKings app and use code BS. Terms and restrictions apply.

*****

On this week's episode:

- Responding to voicemails about bench trials and inappropriate work jokes

- Burning Man Exodus

- East Jesus at Slab City

- Should you join the military?

- Brian's Starfield review

BS with Brian Simpson now has a PATREON!

On this week's minisode: "Neuralink or Mars?"

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get EXCLUSIVE MINISODES every week!

Hit up the Patreon for a free trial and get exclusive access to ALL the minisodes, plus ad-free episodes.

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Thank you to our producer Josh Cabaza and to Comedy Frequency.

***

We have a VOICEMAIL now! Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Check out comedyfrequency.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

SPONSORS:

SHEATH UNDERWEAR: Support the show and get 20% off your first order with code "BS" at https://www.sheathunderwear.com

DRAFTKINGS: Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code "BS." New customers can bet $5 on college football and score $200 in bonus bets. Terms and restrictions apply.

*****

On this week's episode:

00:00 Intro

01:17 Housekeeping

02:07 Netflix Special

03:34 The Process of Creating a Stand-Up Comedy Hour

04:44 Tony aka Mr. New Zealand

08:31 Empathy for Crack-Addicted Former Hotties

09:54 Negatively Received Short Video with High Views on YouTube

10:54 Derogatory Remarks, Internet Services, and Frustration

15:34 Cocaine Sharks

17:14 'The Blind Side' Controversy

28:58 College Athletes' Compensation

32:33 Police officer accused of putting woman in police car hit by train

46:41 Exploring Music Tastes

48:01 Reminiscing about Albums and Stealing CDs

53:18 Mixtapes

BS with Brian Simpson now has a PATREON!

On this week's minisode: "Neuralink or Mars?"

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get EXCLUSIVE MINISODES every week!

Hit up the Patreon for a free trial and get exclusive access to ALL the minisodes, plus ad-free episodes.

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Thank you to our producer Josh Cabaza and to Comedy Frequency.

***

We have a VOICEMAIL now! Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Check out comedyfrequency.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this week's episode:

- Immortals of Aveum

- Unskippable Cutscenes

- Time Is Life

- Starfield is incoming

- Timeblindness

- Late people bother Brian

- A story about being late in the military

- More SAG/WGA strike updates

- “Nobody wants to work anymore”

- F.I.R.E.

- The REAL hustle culture

- The Enhanced Games

- BALCO documentary

- "JESUS IS A PERFORMANCE-ENHANCING DRUG" (PATREON EXCLUSIVE)

BS with Brian Simpson now has a PATREON!

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get EXCLUSIVE MINISODES every week!

Hit up the Patreon for a free trial and get exclusive access to ALL the minisodes, plus ad-free episodes.

Thanks to Griff Parker for this week's track, "Gritty Cakes"!

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Thank you to our producer Josh Cabaza and to Comedy Frequency.

***

We have a VOICEMAIL now! Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Check out comedyfrequency.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode is sponsored by SHEATH:

Support the podcast and support your balls. Head to https://www.sheathunderwear.com and use code "BS" for 20% off your first order!

On this week's episode:

- We DON’T talk about the newest Trump indictment

- It’s Brian’s birthday!

- Samsung Galaxy Tab Ultra S9 Review

- Shooting Brian’s special

- Getting tickets to the Comedy Mothership

- Austin is SMASHING heat records

- Smash-n-grabs in L.A.

- The “Good Boy, Bad Boy” theory of justice

- Population "overshoot"

- There are no good billionaires

- Email from Mat

- Affirmative Action for Rich Kids (PATREON EXCLUSIVE)

BS with Brian Simpson now has a PATREON!

Go to patreon.com/BSwithBrianSimpson to join and help us keep the pod going and get EXCLUSIVE MINISODES every week!

Hit up the Patreon for a free trial and get exclusive access to ALL the minisodes, plus ad-free episodes.

Thanks to Griff Parker for this week's track, "Yellow Cup"!

If you'd like your track featured on BS with Brian Simpson, send it to [email protected] with "music track" in the subject line.

Thank you to our producer Josh Cabaza and to Comedy Frequency.

***

We have a VOICEMAIL now! Call 323-451-1980 to leave us a message. We'll listen to them all and play some of the good ones on the show.

Follow Brian @BScomedian

Find Brian's tour dates at briansimpsoncomedy.com

Email the show at [email protected]

Check out comedyfrequency.com

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.