Call Her Brilliant

Today I’m sharing tips on how to point your brain toward success. Learn to reframe self-doubt and shift your brain towards confidence and the one phrase to look for that signals your brain you're slipping into doubt mode.

Beliefs impact our actions without you even noticing! One belief that develops in our minds is self-doubt. Our brains developed specific fears to keep our ancestors safe but today, these fears can hold us back from experiencing life. It's easier to stay stuck in doubt than to make the change to be more confident.

Learn the key phrases that keep your brain stuck in a cycle of self-doubt, which direction you need to point your brain, and why your brain wants to focus on your mistakes.

Show Highlights

[01:08] The power of beliefs.

[03:40] We all accept beliefs that may be hindering our progress.

[04:44] Social fears accommodate the ability to work together in groups.

[05:45] Fears in modern society can be a negative factor for our success.

[07:37] Catch your brain getting stuck in self-doubt with your words you use.

[10:00] The phrase “Yes, but” lessens our control and self-confidence.

[11:17] Your brain’s ability to focus.

[13:24] Our brain’s default is to focus on negative factors.

[15:49] Your brain notices all your mistakes.

[18:25] Point your mind past the obstacles.

[19:45] It’s impossible for your brain to feel negative thoughts when you are thinking about things you are grateful for.

[21:38] Sign up for my new Confidence Bootcamp!

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Today, we are going to dive into efficiency! Over the last year, I’ve juggled starting this podcast, my new business, and being a mom to a toddler. Working from home gives us extra multi-tasking and added responsibilities to make it all work!

Remember that your brain only has a limited amount of resources, and you need to take time to complete each of your daily tasks. Time is the most limited resource we have. Many of us wish we had more time in the day! I can’t slow time, but I can show you how I add an hour to my life every day with tweaks and hacks to save time.

First, cut out extra time wasters. Television, and scrolling through social media can eat up a large amount of your time fast. Turn on the screen time analytics on your phone to see how much screen time you are using. You might be surprised how much time you are spending on your phone!

Learn ten more things I do every day to save time and increase productivity.Many of the time-savers listed in this episode also save your bank account money. 

Show Highlights

[01:33] Your brain only has a limited amount of resources.

[02:05] Time is the most limited resource.

[04:02] Pick out your outfit the night before. 

[05:44] How to pre-plan your meals. 

[07:41] Using standard meals to save time. 

[09:54] Getting a bath or shower at night can also save time.

[11:37] Have an organized place for the objects in your home.

[13:26] How to chunk your tasks to save time. 

[16:05] Figure out what blocks of time you have to work.

[16:35] Plan your day the night before. 

[18:37] Weekly and monthly to-do lists for long-term planning.

[21:05] Write out your long term goals for the future.

[23:07] Delegate and ask for help.

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Today, I want to share a secret strategy that athletes, musicians, and successful business people use to train their brain. Stay tuned to learn how you can use this strategy in your own life to boost your confidence.

In previous episodes, I’ve talked about how much I love to watch the Olympics. I’ve always been fascinated by how athletes have trained themselves to be focused on their success. They dedicate time, effort, and finances to this one competition - the Olympics. While studying athletes, I’ve found they train their minds just as much as their bodies. Mental preparation is a process athletes practice daily.

Researchers have found that when athletes create their performance in their mind, their body changes and reacts as if they are actually physically doing the movement. Metabolic rates, respiration, and muscle contractions all respond to this mental image they are creating in their mind.

Learn why we don’t have to physically do an action for us to learn, how learning through your mind's power can benefit you, and how you can use mental training as an add-on to strengthen your mind.

Show Highlights

[01:24] Why I love watching the Olympic games.

[02:37] Olympic athletes mentally rehearse their movements. 

[03:43] Mental rehearsal improves performance.

[04:10] How mental practice helps athletes train their bodies.

[06:30] Imagery working to reduce pain in your body.

[07:06] An example of how mental imagery can work in your daily life.

[08:17] How you can practice mental imagery.

[11:10] Practice this exercise and your confidence will go up.

[13:22] Quick tips to help your brain train more efficiently. 

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Today, I’m talking about how the words you say impact your confidence and the four words you need to banish from your vocabulary. I’ll give you practical tips on how to retrain your brain to ditch these confidence-destroying words.

The words and the language we use play a huge role in how we see ourselves and the world around us. Our brains evolved around language. As a matter of fact, language is so essential that the side of your brain that controls language is considered the dominant half of your brain.

The words you use can create a negative self-image. When our brains start down the path of negative thinking, adding negative thoughts perpetuates this negative cycle.

Confidence, on the other hand, is an image you develop over time with practice. Taking four words out of your vocabulary can stop the negative thought cycle in your brain and put you on a path to building your self-esteem.

Learn which four words you need to take out of your vocabulary, why these words hold power in your life, and why it's essential to talk about mistakes as an action and not as who you are in your daily life.

Show Highlights

[01:14] How our words play a role in how we see ourselves and the world.

[04:07] Failure as an action gives us the opportunity to learn from our mistake.

[07:15] Why you need to banish “always” from your vocabulary.

[09:48] Never is another word you should take out of your verbiage.

[11:17] The third word you can do without is “can’t.”

[15:35] Eliminate the “shoulds” from your vocabulary.

[18:15] Rewording our vocabulary gives us perseverance. 

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Today, I’ll be walking you through one of my favorite confidence-building techniques - what I call the “Confidence Ladder.” Listen to this episode to learn how to start your own ladder, and start facing your fears.

Confidence is a skill, just like learning to walk, and we learn best through practice. Specific experiences build our confidence, but others will tear it down.

Our confidence starts out low the first time we are learning a new skill. However, with practice and repetition, our confidence grows.

When you start the confidence ladder, your bottom rung is full of doubt and fear. You may be scared to take that first step. You want to be at the top of the confidence ladder, where you will feel self-assured. Every step on the ladder will move you closer to the top.

Learn how you can move through your confidence ladder, and how to train your  brain to feel less scared and more confident.

Show Highlights

[01:23] How we learn to walk through stages.

[02:41] Confidence is a skill that we can learn.

[05:07] Our confidence starts out low when we start a new skill.

[07:42] How to start training yourself with your own “Confidence Ladder.”

[14:45] Practice helps train your brain for confidence.

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If you know all the reasons you want to change, but you've been struggling to take that first step towards a new habit or goal, this is the episode for you! I'll walk you through one, easy, simple to use a strategy that will kickstart your motivation and train your brain for a change.

I've always loved books, and I keep a stack on my nightstand, waiting to be read. Although it's healthy for your brain to practice reading, don't continue to read a book you don't like.

When I find a good book, however, I love to share and talk about that book. Recently, I finished a book by Mel Robbins called The Five-Second Rule. In her book, she shares how she struggled with crippling anxiety. Mel describes panic attacks and being out of control in her book.

Remember how our brains love to stay stuck in our safe habits? In her book, Mel talks about how we can snap out of the cycle and get our minds to start changing.  

To change, we need a strategy to rewire our brains out of our old habits and new patterns. When we fail our big goals, we get discouraged. We can fail out before we even get started. However, we can make small, baby-step changes that equal significant changes down the road.

When you make small changes work, your brain gets a boost of confidence. As a result, your mind is much more likely to make another change.

Learn why small changes end up snowballing over time, how you can train your brain for confidence, and how you can learn to be successful and trust yourself.

Show Highlights

[01:49] When I find a good book, I love to share that book!

[04:14] It’s easier for our brains to do the same old patterns, instead of starting a new habit.

[05:17] The problem with big monumental goals.

[06:25] One of the easiest ways to change our habits is to change our actions.

[07:30] Thinking about making huge changes is overwhelming for your brain.

[09:20] Going for too much at one time equals big losses.

[10:22] Everyday acts of courage.

[12:23] How Mel used her five-second rule to get out of bed.

[13:57] Counting down can snap you out of your stress pattern.

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In this episode, we are diving into two things that hold you back from change: fear and comfort. At the end of this episode, I’ll share with you a pivotal strategy to use almost every day in many different situations to create a pathway for your brain to change a bad habit.

I’ve never been a morning person, and I don’t schedule activities before work. I often struggle to get out of bed when the alarm goes off. I’ve been using a great trick to get out of bed with my alarm, which I’ll share with you today!

Comfort and fear have incredible power over us and can prevent us from moving forward to change our habits. Also, your brain doesn’t like change and definitely does not wish to be uncomfortable. Our brains have a more comfortable life if we stay just the way we are and never change.

The most comfortable place our brains can be is when we are stuck in our old habits. To stay with your past, harmful habit is a trick your brain is trying to play on you. Good sleep habits are critical for us to get a good night’s sleep. Listen to episode seven, where I talk about the significance of sleep habits.

Morning routines are essential to gear your brain up for work mode. Did you know that hitting the snooze button actually is a bad habit for your brain? When you hit snooze, your brain goes into another sleep cycle, lasting up to another 90 minutes. Hitting snooze multiple times breaks multiple sleep cycles, which results in struggling to get out of bed.

Learn why getting up when your alarm goes off is better for productivity, why snoozing can be stifling your health, happiness, and productivity and why the fear of the unknown and the fear of risk can create worst-case scenarios and prevent you from moving forward.

Show Highlights

[01:47] An example of how I’m not a morning person.

[03:14] Why it's so hard to change daily habits.

[05:10] The importance of sleep and why quality sleep is important.

[06:22] Morning routines to start your day and gear up for work mode.

[08:46] Why snoozing isn’t a good habit for your brain.

[10:54] Change brings risk, and uncertainty, which our brains do not want.

[11:10] Your brain’s default mode is lazy and doesn’t want to expend energy doing different habits.

[12:27] Use the five second rule to break old habits and create new ones.

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In this episode, I'll talk about how to find the confidence to say "No!" and how being afraid to hurt someone's feelings, or being afraid to look bad may be burning you out.

Recently I said “yes” to a work project that I didn’t want.  As soon as I said yes, I felt bad about agreeing to the project, and as the deadline got closer I started to dread the assignment.

Do you find that you take on too much? Are you often feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, or there isn't enough time? Do you find yourself agreeing to tasks you honestly don't want to do? You know just like I did almost as soon as you said yes, that you should have said no, but you say yes anyway!

The struggle to say no comes from fear. The fear of what others are thinking about us. Maybe you’re a bit of a people pleaser so you avoid saying no so you don’t hurt anyone’s feelings. Or you doubt yourself so you keep saying yes to prove yourself. But you just end up taking on extra work and burning out! 

Learn why you should stop worrying about being "liked" by other people, why saying "yes" too much leads to missing out on the activities that really matter, and how saying yes to too many projects leads to regret and resentment.

Show Highlights

[01:05] How I ended up saying yes to a work project I didn’t want to do.

[03:20] Why the struggle to say no comes from fear. 

[03:55] The people pleaser and why they have a hard time saying “no”.

[07:15] Self-doubt and worry can lead to burn out.

[09:07] Being stressed about being perfect leads to mistakes and more stress for perfectionists.

[11:02] How you can miss out on what really matters because you say “yes” to everything.

[12:31] Saying “yes” is easier in the moment than accepting someone won’t like you.

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In this episode, I'll explain the reasons why being a perfectionist can burn you out, and the one question you need to ask yourself to determine if your inner perfectionist is creeping up on you.

You may have figured out that I'm a bit of a perfectionist myself. At a minimum, I'm a bit overprepared. Listen in to hear the story of all my lists for my wedding, and how I still almost forgot the rings!

Despite our best preparation, some things just don't go as we planned. Life throws us curve balls all the time, and this can be really hard to deal with if you’re a perfectionist. We feel that we need to control everything, and when we realize we can't, everything seems to unravel in front of us.

Being a perfectionist doesn't always work out, there are going to be things in our lives that we simply can't control. Wanting to be perfect all the time can work against us in many situations. As a perfectionist, our brains love to control and want to know exactly what's going to happen. When things don't go as we planned, we achieve an extra-high level of stress in our lives and incredibly draining.

Learn why perfectionism leads to procrastination, extra work for you, and burnout.

Show Highlights

[01:26] How I ended up micromanaging my wedding. 

[04:54] Being a perfectionist doesn’t always work out.

[05:17] What happens to the perfectionist when things are truly out of control.

[08:02] Using energy to be a perfectionist wastes our energy. 

[10:03] How perfectionism leads to burnout. 

[14:45] Common negative self-judgements we have of ourselves because of perfectionism.

[16:30] Your quirks and flaws are a part of who you are!

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In this episode, I'm sharing tips on how to create more energy for your day, and how to prevent your brain from getting into habits that are draining your mental resources. You’ll learn the four patterns that consume your energy and leave you exhausted at the end of your day.

When you get up in the morning, do you feel energized and ready to take on your day? As your day progresses, does your energy stay up, or are you feeling zapped and burnt out by the end of the day? If you’re like most of us, you find you don’t seem to have enough energy to get through your day, and all you want to do is flop on the couch when you get home. 

Did you know that your brain uses most of the power in your body? Your brain uses approximately 20% of your body's energy daily. Considering how small your brain is, that’s a huge resource suck!

Self-doubt and other negative thoughts can unexpectedly drain your resources. These energy drainers can leave you depleted before you've finished your day and decrease your daily productivity.

Listen in to learn how mental activities can be just as draining as physical activities, how thinking traps can quickly use up your limited brain resources, and how to get more energy back in your day.

Show Highlights

[03:04] Our brains use about 20% of our total body energy.

[05:17] Trap #1 that drains your energy: general worry and stress.

[08:45] Trap #2 draining your energy: self-doubt.

[13:40] Trap #3 worrying about what other people think.

[15:35] Trap #4: worrying that you’re not good enough.

[21:23] Schedule time for relaxation and give your brain a vacation!

[22:57] Make sure to get enough sleep, and listen in to Episode 007 where I talk about the importance of sleep.

[26:45] Why skipping meals is not a good way to get more done.

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