Call Her Brilliant

In this episode, I'll give you tips about how you can stop taking the actions of others too personally. I also talk about why you want to avoid turning yourself into vanilla ice cream just to be liked. 

So often, we think we are mind readers, and we know why another person is acting or behaving a certain way. The trouble with mind-reading is we don't actually know what someone else is thinking. We use our thoughts to make an impression based on what we think is happening in another person's mind. Something as small as a colleague not responding to your email can send your brain into self-doubt and worry that person doesn’t like you or care.

When we believe we know what someone else is thinking, we are mind-reading. This can lead us down a rabbit hole of negative thinking. Next, your body starts having physical fallout from your negative feelings. From stress headaches to body tension and tight muscles, there are a variety of ways this negative thought process can affect your health.

Listen in to find out how our brains can take the fear of "not being liked" to the extreme, why we feel like we need to hide who we really are around others, and why we put so much energy into others "liking" us. Learn how we can burn ourselves out when we try too hard to make people like us, why putting on a front is hard on your confidence, and how changing your physical location can change your brain's thinking pathway.

Show Highlights

[02:10] My story of how my friend thought I was doubting because of my concentration face..

[06:29] How mind-reading shows up physically in your body.

[07:47] The negative spiral of feelings can hurt your relationship with others.

[08:58] Fear holds us back from building connections with people.

[11:32] Why we put on a mask to be or act a certain way with others.

[14:00] Effects of not being true to ourselves and how that hurts us.

[16:30] Steps you can take to reset your brain and nervous system.

[21:00] Don’t turn yourself into vanilla ice cream!

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: Drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Drnicolebyers.com/habits

In this episode, I'll give you tips about how to fight back against mom guilt and feel less burnt out at the end of your day.

For me, my mom guilt kicks in when my toddler, Allison, asks me to stay and play for just a few more minutes when I'm walking out the door to work. I feel that punch to my stomach, wishing I could stay and play with my daughter and the myriad of emotions that spiral from this point related to mom guilt. I start thinking about work as a “bad thing” because it means leaving my daughter, and I worry I’m being a bad mom!

Mom guilt, and all other forms of guilt, comes from us judging and being critical of ourselves. We get into a pattern of comparing ourselves to how we should be, how we should measure up, and we are left feeling wanting. We also compare ourselves to other moms, social media personalities, and famous moms and we can be so hard on ourselves when we don’t measure up! We set the bar so high, and when we don't reach that bar, we feel bad and guilty. This is a path to stress and burnout.

Listen in to find out why guilt and other negative emotions drain your brain, how constant stress can impact our minds and our bodies, and how social media plays into our guilt and daily anxiety. Learn why admitting we need help is hard for us, and why it's not possible to do it all yourself.

Show Highlights

[01:18] Feeling the dreaded mom guilt!

[02:47] The “shoulds” that I’m feeling can leave me burnt out at the end of the day.

[04:43] Negative emotions and thoughts which will drain our energy and ruin the quality of our sleep.

[06:27] Our expectations and standards of what it's like to be a mom. 

[08:00] Social media’s impact on our lives.

[12:18] It takes a village to raise a family.

[13:51] True balance equates to harmony and our brains working in sync.

[15:33] Tip #1: We need to stop judging ourselves and other women. 

[19:22] Tip #2: Call a mom you trust and tell her what you’re thinking.

[21:04] Tip #3: Do something for yourself and take time for yourself.

[24:00] Our brains are super good at focusing on bad stuff, and how to stop this.

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: Drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Drnicolebyers.com/habits

Have you ever come home from vacation and said you needed a vacation from your vacation? In this episode, I'll walk you through how to take a vacation minus the stress of preparing for your adventure.

Vacations can be stressful. Even if it’s a fun trip, you're in a new place and your brain is working extra hard to stay organized. All the extra mental effort that goes into organizing and planning a vacation can burn you out before you even start. 

Today, I'm going to share with you my top tips for having a stress-free vacation. These tips will take away some of the stress that comes with vacation planning, and help you actually enjoy your trip!

Show Highlights

[01:52] Trying to pack as many activities as we can into our vacation can burn us out.

[02:29] Tip #1: Make lists.

[04:09] A brain hack to make packing easier.

[10:05] Tip #2: Plan your vacation so you don’t try and cram everything in on the last day.

[15:00] Tip #3: Delegate. You don’t have to be in charge of everything! It’s your vacation too.

[19:44] Bonus tip: Schedule time for yourself, even if it's only a few minutes a day.

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: Drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Drnicolebyers.com/habits

Are you feeling stressed out and overwhelmed trying to do it all? As a working mom with big career dreams I know what it’s like to not have enough time in the day, and to lack the skills and confidence to reach your goals. I have spent years understanding how our brains work, and learning what holds us back from having the courage to reach our dreams. Each week I’ll be sharing practical strategies to help you find more time in your day, build your confidence, fight back against mom guilt, and reach your goals. Learn to thrive from home and at work with The Bold Life.

In this episode, I’m talking about a fear many of us have, that’s the fear of failure. Listen to learn why it’s actually a good thing to fail.

No one likes to fail. It doesn’t feel good. Even our bodies react when we fail. Our shoulders slump, we feel tense, and our stomachs drop. This sends the message to our brains that failure isn’t fun, and is something we should avoid.

But we weren’t born fearing failure. The first time you walked and immediately fell back down, did little toddler you give up and feel bad because they failed? Nope, you got yourself back up and tried again, and again, and again until you figured it out.

As we get older this changes. We start to avoid failure at all costs, which holds us back from taking chances and chasing our dreams.

There are three overarching reasons that we avoid failure:

1. We don’t want to be judged by others
2. We have learned to expect instant success
3. We start to take failure personally

We can change failure by:

• Knowing that failure is normal
• Understanding why failure is important
• Training our brains to see failure as a learning experience

Listen in to find out how to change failure into progress, why practice is so important, and why failure is essential.

Show Highlights

[01:42] Failure feels bad to our brains and bodies so we learn to avoid it.

[04:47] Why fear of embarrassment and rejection lead us to fear failing.

[06:53] Three overarching reasons we don’t want to fail.

[12:20] Failing doesn’t mean you’re a failure.  

[13:57] Understanding how to overcome the fear of failure and move ahead.

[17:40] Our brains need to understand bad emotions to appreciate good emotions.

[21:33] How to use failure to grow and learn.

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: Drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Drnicolebyers.com/habits

Are you feeling stressed out and overwhelmed trying to do it all? As a working mom with big career dreams I know what it’s like to not have enough time in the day, and to lack the skills and confidence to reach your goals. I have spent years understanding how our brains work, and learning what holds us back from having the courage to reach our dreams. Each week I’ll be sharing practical strategies to help you find more time in your day, build your confidence, fight back against mom guilt, and reach your goals. Learn to thrive from home and at work with The Bold Life.

In this episode, I’ll walk you through why it’s hard to change habits. Hint: there are good reasons for any habit, even those that seem like they are bad habits. I’ll also talk about why our brains learn bad habits in the first place.

Chances are, you don’t have to think too hard about brushing your teeth in the morning. You’ve done this so many times it’s become a habit, and your brain almost automatically runs through the motions without thinking. 

Good habits help us save time and energy, but we all have bad habits that interfere with our health, happiness, productivity, and success in the long run. 

Changing a habit can be tough. Listen in to find the secret to getting rid of any bad habit, how to start a new good habit, and why we have trouble sticking to our resolutions. Find out why creating small habit changes can lead to bigger success, and why you can be successful at one goal and not follow-through on another goal.

Show Highlights

[01:22] We all have habits - ways of doing things almost automatically.

[02:12] The negative side effect of bad habits that get in our way.

[06:42] How to change your habits, even if they are small habits. 

[12:21] Why it's so hard to stick to a new habit and ditch an old habit.

[16:23] Make sure to replace the benefits of your old habit, with reasons to change. [18:34] We need to convince our brain that our new habits are worth the risk of change.

[26:19] Find my habit changing worksheet drnicolebyers.com/habits

[30:27] How to work through the habits worksheet.

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: Drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Drnicolebyers.com/habits

Are you feeling stressed out and overwhelmed trying to do it all? As a working mom with big career dreams I know what it’s like to not have enough time in the day, and to lack the skills and confidence to reach your goals. I have spent years understanding how our brains work, and learning what holds us back from having the courage to reach our dreams. Each week I’ll be sharing practical strategies to help you find more time in your day, build your confidence, fight back against mom guilt, and reach your goals. Learn to thrive from home and at work with The Bold Life.

Chances are, you feel like there’s never enough time in the day and like you never seem to get enough done. You feel disorganized, rushed, burnt out - like you just can’t seem to get ahead. 

Why do some people seem to get so much more work done? How do they check off their to-do list and have energy at the end of their day? In this episode, I’m sharing five strategies to stay organized at work, maximize your brain’s efficiency, and get more done in the day. 

Strategy #1: Cut out the clutter

Strategy #2: Get laser-focused on your to-do list (and check out Episode# 5 to find out why your to-do list is burning you out).

Strategy #3: Stop trying to multitask at work.

Strategy #4: Give your brain a break.

Strategy #5: Take some time at the end of the day to review and plan for the next day.

Want to get more done in your day? Listen in to find out how you can apply these five strategies, and to learn what might be draining your energy and making you less efficient.

Show Highlights

[01:10] My story of meeting an organizational unicorn.

[04:35] Why cutting out the physical and mental clutter makes you more efficient. [09:23] How to create a to-do list for a day that you can actually accomplish.

[11:46] Multitasking is a lie and doesn’t make you more productive.

[14:03] Changes you can make in your office to reduce distraction and boost productivity.

[15:05] Your brain needs a break every 60 to 90 minutes or your efficiency will tank

[20:02] How it can be helpful to batch tasks, and do a few similar activities together.

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

When you wake up in the morning, do you feel rested and ready to tackle the day? Do you start to feel low on energy by mid-afternoon, like you need that extra infusion of caffeine? If you’re not feeling energized all day, you may not be getting enough sleep. 

While it might not seem so bad to burn the midnight oil to finish a project now and again, those late nights add up. So do all those nights spent tossing and turning because you have so much on your mind. Lack of sleep can impact our physical health including  weight gain, diabetes, and heart disease. It can also impact our emotional health and make us feel more irritable or burnt out. To top it off, poor sleep is hard on our brains. It makes our thinking less efficient and we are slower to get things done!

In this episode, I’m sharing how you can get a good night’s sleep and actually feel rested in the morning. I’ll walk you through my top ten tips to get a better night’s sleep. 

Show Highlights

[02:03] Why does getting enough sleep matter to our brains and bodies?

[[06:00] The long term effects of not getting enough sleep f.

[07:28] Treat your brain like a toddler with a good sleep routine.

[13:00] Why beds should be used only for the the two S’s - Sleep and sex.

[14:54] Why it’s a bad idea to lay in bed not sleeping for hours.

[17:05] Exercise and diet impact your sleep

[21:11] A bonus way to trick your brain into thinking you had a good night’s sleep. 

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Today on The Bold Life podcast I'll be sharing two ways you can develop confidence when public speaking. Public speaking is terrifying for many of us. 25% of people report a fear of public speaking. And you don’t have to be speaking in front of a big group of people to bring on this anxiety and fear. Speaking in front of a group of co-workers or leading a group discussion can cause our stomach to do backflips and our hearts to race. 

I share what it’s like for me when I speak in front of a group, and how I fight past the anxiety that comes when I speak. I've built up my ability to speak in public because the more I speak, the more confident I become. Remember, confidence is a skill! 

Before you get up to speak, think about the following questions:

• What do you tell yourself?
• What are the thoughts that are going through your head?
• Are your thoughts moving towards doubt?
• Am I harboring limiting beliefs?
• Are my physical actions reflecting negative beliefs in my head?

Listen in to find out the two reasons we lack confidence when we speak, and how to retrain your brain to build confidence in public speaking. Learn how our brains take cues from our body, why we are more likely to make mistakes when our minds are focused on negative thoughts, and how we can unlearn the fear of public speaking.

Show Highlights

[01:01] Public speaking is terrifying for many of us, 25% of people report a fear of public speaking. 

[02:21] The story of how I ran off stage crying when I was 8 and what I learned from it. 

[06:56] Confidence is a skill that we learn through practice.

[09:40] Reason 1 that public speaking scares us - We learn through experiences

[11:23] Reason 2 that public speaking scares us -  The mental record we keep playing on repeat when we get into these situations.

[14:24] Our bodies take negative and positive cues from our brain.

[16:10] The fear of public speaking is something we can unlearn over time and how we can change our behavior to overcome this fear.

[21:59] Think of confidence like a muscle you need to train.

[22:38] A strategy I recommend to build your public speaking muscle.

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

Are you a working mom who doesn't feel like you have enough time in your day to reach your dreams and goals? I've spent years learning how our brains work and what holds us back from having the courage to achieve our dreams. Each week I'll be sharing practical strategies to help you to find more time in your day, build your confidence, fight back against mom guilt, and reach your goals. Learn to thrive from home and at work with The Bold Life.

This week on The Bold Life podcast, I'm talking about why your giant to-do list might actually be burning you out. I also share how to make a to-do list that works, and why having a shorter list can actually make you more productive. 

To-do lists are great for:

• Keeping our brains on track
• Tracking productivity
• Realizing how much work we have completed in our day
• Making our day productive and not just “busy”
• Getting us closer to our goals

Listen in to find out why to-do lists can have a downside, how big lists can make us feel frustrated with not getting enough done, and why holding ourselves to super high standards can lead to high stress. Learn how to recognize the first signs of burnout, and how to focus your to-do list to get the things done that actually make a difference in your day.

Show Highlights

[01:04] Why to-do lists are great, until they’re not

[05:04] Physical signs of stress and burnout from having a giant to-do list.

[08:19] Being busy doesn’t mean you’re being productive.

[11:05] How to laser focus your to-do list to feel less stressed and more productive.

[18:10] Not everything is going to get done on our to-do list and that’s OK.

[21:38] Our bodies are going to burn out from the stress of always being busy if we don’t take control!

Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz

This week on The Bold Life podcast, I'm talking about battery chargers and battery drainers. How certain people fill us with positive energy, but others drain our energy and prevent us from reaching our goals. 

I’m sharing why I love to watch the Olympics (I’m glued to my TV for two weeks while they’re on), and a story from the 1996 Olympic Games where a young woman named Kerri Strug inspired the world.  

People who are potential battery chargers could be:

• People who inspire us, fill us with energy.
• Family, friends, a mentor or others who are close to us
• People we aspire to be like such as an athlete or a leader in our field

Listen in to find out why all battery chargers have one thing in common, what happens after we interact with these positive people, and how we feel around battery drainers. Learn why a growth mindset is essential for battery chargers, and how those with a fixed mindset are often battery drainers.

Show Highlights

[02:01] My all-time favorite Olympics story from the 1996 Women’s Gymnastic team vault session.

[06:35] Why battery chargers make us feel “bigger” and more confident.

[07:50] The emotional fallout of spending too much time with battery drainers.

[11:37] Why you can have a fixed or growth mindset in one area of your life but not another.

[14:24] Why our brains thrive being around battery chargers

[17:54] Ways to find more battery chargers in your life.

[20:15] How to tell if someone is a battery charger or a battery drainer.


Subscribe Today!

Apple Podcast

Spotify

Android

Stitcher

RSS

Links | Resources

IG: @DrNicoleByers

Facebook: Dr. Nicole Byers

Website: drnicolebyers.com

Email [email protected]

Drnicolebyers.com/quiz