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Cognitive Contortions
By Cognitive ContortionsComedy
Cognitive Contortions episodes
- (Thanksgiving Special?) Episode 45: Hood Party PoliticsThis week , the boys sit down for two and a half hours to talk about anything and everything! This week, in lieu of a Thanksgiving special, the fellas have an open, candid discussion; about what are usually very awkward and infuriating topics. Between the laughs, and the positive disagreements coming to a delightful conclusion; we hope you’ll spend your holiday travels, or stay at home orders, with us. Happy Thanksgiving Neewers and Goays!2 hr 26 min
- (Halloween Special!) Episode 44: Witches, Literally, be Tripping.This week for our 2020 Halloween special, the boys talk about Witches. The legends and history of the inquisitions, the witches of antiquity, and the possible real reason the church hunted them for almost 300 years. Lots of irreverent laughs, some fun, recently discovered possible theories, and a lot of literal shit talk at the front end. (Sorry about that), and Happy Halloween!1 hr 35 min
- (Venus?) Episode 43: Grampy’s Psychedelic Mammoth Space Adventure!This week the boys discuss Psychedelics, life on or around Venus, and space in general. Tyler talks about a trip to a museum, Joey P. gives his best advice, and Ty just has an overall educational evening. We also have a brief and slightly flippant discussion about mortality so... trigger warnings and such.1 hr 6 min
- (Social Media) Episode 42: Judgmental Pelican MomThis week the boys discuss the addictive tendencies of social media and the way it manipulates our thoughts and beliefs. We also talk state flags, Sleep Apnea, and Nic Cage divinity.1 hr 39 min
- (Bob Lazar) Episode 41: Tony Hawk Tomb RaiderThis week we dive into Bob Lazar and the recently announced UFO confirmation by the pentagon. We also talk old video games, Trump Sadlibs and reality.1 hr 22 min
- (Current Events) Episode 40: Crate that baby!This week the gang is all back together to talk current events and random thoughts! We talk about talking to our moms, pinpointing the moments that could have kept us from existence, and Trumps horrifically transparent interference with the post office.1 hr
- (Wayfair/Elitists) Episode 39: Categories Of C**tThis week the boys hop back into conspiracies and remember why they took a break in the first place. Tyler try’s to talk about aliens but gets distracted by potential child trafficking. Aaron attempts to break Tys arm in an attempt to save Scott, and Ty breaks down how poor we all really are. We also flush out some Unasian laws and constitutional statutes.And thanks for the use of our theme song to Koit and Time Ireland.1 hr 51 min
- Episode 38: Dying of Dick Rot: The Musical!This week the guys catch up and shoot the shit. Tyler tells a story about his car he’s been sitting on for months, Aaron explains Ty’s only fault, (telling stories too often and repeatedly), and Ty lives up to that fault by telling some stories for a second and third time. We talk some more Nicolas Cage, stupid things politicians say, the Baltimore City impound lot, Hamilton, and Unasia.1 hr 45 min
- Episode 37: F*ckin’ 4 ChickensThe Goays are back and in here! This week Fellas attempt to form their own form of government. Tyler helps establish the economic system, Aaron establishes the main form of currency, an Ty establishes our one government agency.1 hr 32 min
- (Remix!) Episode 36: Solo: A Nicholas Cage StoryWe’re back Neewers and Goays! After a brief break and a little revamping, Ty brings you a Nicholas Cage centric episode, Tyler loses his mind over the Solo movie, (again), and Aaron expresses his feelings about bicyclists.New format means new theme song, enjoy!1 hr 20 min
About Cognitive Contortions
From the publisher's feed
Have you ever lain awake at night pondering the big questions as you stare at the ceiling, waiting for the ever impending embrace of death? Questions like: “Why do people think the earth is flat?”,…
or, “Who came up with the idea of Reptilian overlords?”, and of course, “Is Donald Trump actually president? How did this happen and are we positive that we’re not just living in a nightmare?” - Well, here at the Cognitive Contortions Podcast we attempt to answer those questions, and many, many more. Our highly untrained and certainly unqualified team of investigator, (there’s only one), works tiredly, (seriously, this stuff is exhausting), to bring as much information to the table as possible. Using the most advanced databases and search optimization available in today’s modern age, (google), the self proclaimed amateur experts discuss and answer claims of conspiracy and theory. Please don’t let these burning, most important questions of our time keep you awake any longer, join us while four idiots, Tyler, Scott, Aaron and other Tyler, crush on Keanu Reeves, reference Star Wars, play pointless games and sort of talk about conspiracy theories; and you too can have, “peace of mind.” (T-Rex hands)