coucou

What if coming apart isn’t the same as falling apart?

Stuck in traffic on a French highway, Kim found herself wondering how she ended up there, and whether she had unraveled since moving to France. Using a sweater and thread analogy, she reflects on the schools, jobs, homes and “shoulds” we knit together into a life that looks good, and why questioning it can feel so uncomfortable.

Kim shares what she has been letting go of, from guilt and constant productivity to frenetic energy, and what she has uncovered along the way: new curiosities, an Enneagram class taken entirely in French, and things she loved as a child. She also talks about why the people closest to us don’t always welcome the change. When you unravel, you uncover. Which thread might you be ready to pull?

Plus, a few hot topics from France this fall, including the aisle of anti-lice products at every pharmacy and the Halloween costume she couldn’t buy until October 1.

Resources:

Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod

The Enneagram Institute: enneagraminstitute.com

Website: coucoupod.com

Substack: kimberlyannwheeler.substack.com

Produced by NOVA

Why would a bartender in Paris taste a wine, swirl it and spit it into the sink at 1:30 in the afternoon, and what does it say about how differently France and the US drink?

In this episode of coucou, Kim looks at French vs. American drinking culture, from a bar stool in Paris to her own table in Provence. It begins with an apéro she hosted for French families, where she finally tried to get the cheese plate right: mildest to strongest, clockwise, room to breathe, no crackers. One fig pâté in the middle of the board set off a thirty-minute conversation about rules nobody had ever written down for her. From there she looks at the rhythm that shapes a French day: wine with lunch, a café, a sweet goûter in the late afternoon, then apéro at seven.

Kim loves to dine solo in Paris, and in the 6th arrondissement she watched two cultures meet over one meal. An American diner ordered a second dirty martini just as her duck breast arrived, and a waiter quietly suggested the wine list. Neither understood the other. For one, the drink is the point. For the other, it is part of the meal. Kim wonders where our habits come from, from her Midwest upbringing and sorority days at the University of Wisconsin to why a day party feels normal to some and baffling to others.

This isn't about which culture gets it right. Kim is an American expat three years into life in France, and she isn't trying to become French or give up the things she grew up with. She is learning to savor, with a wine class on the calendar, while keeping her beach-day drink and her first dirty martini back in the US. Which of your own everyday habits would you discover you had inherited if you lived somewhere else?

Resources:

Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod

Produced by NOVA

What if the life you're supposed to live isn't the one you actually want?

Kim sits down with Anne Ditmeyer, an American designer, creative coach, and author who has spent nearly two decades building an unconventional life and career in Paris. Through her workshops, creative exercises, and book OVERRIDE: What If There Was Another Way?, Anne helps people question the rules they've inherited and imagine new possibilities for themselves.

Together, they explore what it means to create your own path, why we feel pressured to have everything figured out, and how creativity, curiosity, and small experiments can help us navigate uncertainty. Anne also shares the less glamorous realities of life in Paris, from French bureaucracy and making friends to her adventures exploring the city's public swimming pools.

It's a conversation about trusting yourself, embracing the messy middle, and remembering that there's always another way to live.

Resources:

• Anne Ditmeyer's website, workshops, and newsletter: annedittmeyer.com

• Anne on Instagram: @pretavoyager

• OVERRIDE: What If There Was Another Way? by Anne Ditmeyer

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

• Visit our website coucoupod.com

Produced by NOVA

What happens when you stop following the path that makes sense and start listening to what you actually want?

Kim sits down in Paris with Jenny Minney, a graphic, brand and editorial designer and host of the podcast By Design. Jenny left New York City and moved to Paris in her 20s, following a desire that didn't necessarily make sense for her career, relationship or the life she had already built.

They talk about learning to trust your intuition, letting go of five-year plans, navigating uncertainty and separating your identity from your work. Jenny also shares how moving abroad changed her relationship with social media, success, anxiety and the pressure women feel to have everything figured out.

It's a conversation about Another Way to Live, and why sometimes designing a life that feels like your own means being willing to step off the path you're "supposed" to follow.

Resources:

• Follow Jenny Minney On Instagram

• By Design podcast

• Accord French Language School in Paris

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

Produced by NOVA

Kim sits down with Lauriane Blanc, a French woman who left the Loire Valley for New York City and went on to co-found Women Abroad Club, a community helping women build meaningful lives abroad.

With Kim building a life in France and Lauriane building one in America, they compare what each culture gets right, from career ambition and education to food, fashion, friendship and the very different ways French and American women connect. Lauriane also shares what surprised her most about American life, what still makes her feel unmistakably French and why moving abroad can completely change your idea of home.

They also get into the less glamorous side of starting over somewhere new: learning a language, finding your people, navigating work and putting yourself outside your comfort zone again and again. Lauriane shares why community and even one meaningful relationship can make such a difference when you’re trying to create a life in another country.

Resources:

• Women Abroad Club

• Women Abroad Cast

• Lauriane Blanc on LinkedIn

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

Produced by NOVA

September in France means la rentrée, a return to school, work, routines and everyday life after summer. But after four years living in Aix-en-Provence, Kim has realized it can also be a chance to return to yourself.

After a summer road trip through the French Alps, Switzerland and Italy, Kim is reflecting on the things she wants to carry with her into this next season. She shares what living in France has taught her about being present, slowing down, letting go of constant productivity, making space for creativity and becoming more comfortable with uncertainty.

She also opens up about anxiety, guilt, watching her children grow older and the complicated emotions that come with building a beautiful life far from family. Rather than making another list of resolutions, Kim is thinking about another way to live, one centered on the things that actually make a life feel meaningful.

Resources:

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

Produced by NOVA

Kim is answering more of your questions about life in France, from how French parents balance work, kids and weeknight dinners to what motherhood looks like when women don’t completely change their style after having children.

She shares how her friendships have evolved after nearly four years abroad, the one part of French culture she’d take with her anywhere, and the unexpected things her kids noticed during their recent trip back to the U.S., including screen time and the way Americans talk about food.

Kim also revisits Bringing Up Bébé after raising her own children in France and shares which observations still feel true. Plus, drawing on her years working at Sephora, she compares French and American beauty standards, from skincare and “baby Botox” to perfectly polished beauty versus the French preference for leaving something a little imperfect.

Resources:

• Bringing Up Bébé by Pamela Druckerman

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

• coucou Podcast Website

Produced by NOVA

What happens when you build a life that looks successful from the outside, but somewhere along the way stop asking whether it actually feels right?

Kim reflects on the life she and her family built in Marin County,  San Francisco, CA before moving to France, from corporate careers and private schools to the subtle pressure of titles, homes, cars and keeping up appearances. She shares a vulnerable moment on the Golden Gate Bridge when everything she had been pushing down finally caught up with her, and how a lyric from The National’s “Fake Empire” gave her language for what she was feeling.

Three years after leaving that life behind, Kim shares how distance has changed the way she thinks about success, comparison and the choices we make without questioning why. France didn’t provide an instant answer, but it gave her enough space to ask a different question: If nobody else were watching, would you still choose the life you’re living?

Resources:

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

Produced by NOVA

After three years living in France, some of the French behaviors Kim once found strange don’t seem so strange anymore. From topless beaches and bikinis at every age to a much more laissez-faire approach to parenting, she reflects on the cultural differences that have made her question some of her own American habits.

She also shares what she’s learned about the French tendency to complain, critique and say “c’est pas mal,” and why that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re less happy. Instead, she’s beginning to see how much value the French place on enjoying the day that’s actually in front of them rather than constantly chasing what comes next.

Plus, Kim shares her advice on the best time to visit the South of France and why June, September and October may be better choices than the peak summer months.

Resources:

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

Produced by NOVA

Kim thought moving to France would mean she’d naturally “pick up” French. What she quickly realized was that immersion alone isn't enough and becoming comfortable in another language takes far more patience, courage and deliberate practice than she expected.

In this episode, Kim shares the do’s and don’ts she’s learned while studying French as an adult, from creating her own immersion through podcasts and French TV to giving herself daily “bravery challenges” that forced her to speak even when she was afraid of getting it wrong. She also shares some of the mistakes she can laugh about now, including accidentally buying diarrhea medicine for her daughter’s fever, ordering a Thanksgiving turkey for the wrong day and completely misspelling her daughter’s name on a birthday cake.

More than anything, learning French has taught her what it feels like to be a beginner again. It’s been an exercise in patience, humility and getting comfortable with making mistakes, while recognizing just how rewarding those little breakthroughs can feel.

Resources:

• Alliance Française

• Don't forget to subscribe, rate & review and follow us on Instagram @coucou.pod 

Produced by NOVA