The 'No Sports' Sports Report is brought to you by 49 Cent Video

49 Cent Video: High school kids love smoking darts in our back alley.

Stacie: 'Despite this whole social distancing thing, I've actually seen my friends and family more than usual thanks to video chats!'

Clayton: 'Yeah and thanks to those video chats I've seen more double chins than I've ever seen before. There's no hiding from the double chin on a video call'

The one you've all been waiting for... Today, the 'No Sports' Sports Report was brought to you by Penguin Village.

Penguin Village: The shirtless Dad capital of Saskatoon

'Yesterday I asked my wife how her shower was. She didn't take a shower though, her hair was just greasy. So yeah, that's how social distancing is going at the Kroeker household'

Also on the show today... Is mixing and matching bananas at the grocery store bad style, the best time ever to be a dog, the Sid Buckwold Bridge sucks again, Green Shirt Day, & a bunch of other fun stuff!

The SAAN Store, Zellers, The Barry Hotel... We've been having fun with the fake sponsors for the 'No Sports' Sports Report.

Today, it was Esmerelda's turn... aka 'Ezzys' because no one called it Esmerelda's.

Clayton: 'Having a messy Tupperware drawer is like the TV show 'Mantracker'... It's your mission to find the missing lid that has gone missing from it's proper container and you don't have a lot of clues. You have to rely on your senses.'

Stacie: '... what the hell are you talking about??'

Also on the show today: Cruz Confused Lyrics: first name edition, the 'No Sports' Sports Report was super sad today, & reusable bags might not be the best idea after all

The 'No Sports' Sports Report is brought to you by The Wash n' Slosh.

The Wash n' Slosh: Because laundry without a buzz is just a waste of time.

'If you order some take out in the next few days, watch how your delivery driver drops off your order. After they leave it at your doorstep, they turn into Donovan Bailey from 1996... just sprinting back to the car as fast as they can'

Also on the show today... The 'No Sports' Sports Report, personal space in a marriage is key, a Joe Exotic PSA, the best and worst pranks from yesterday, & Clayton has a man crush on Lanigans Mayor.

Yesterday, The 'No Sports' Sports Report was brought to you by Zellers.

Today, it's Campus Cove's turn

(P.S. I don't have a fake sponsor for tomorrow, so if you have a good idea leave it in the comments!)

Stacie: 'Wouldn't it be tough for a stand-up comedian to do a set from their living room via Facebook Live? Don't comedians feed off the crowd? How hard would it be telling jokes and having no one there laugh?'

Clayton: 'Telling jokes and having no one laugh.... that brings back memories of what I used to do stand-up'

Also on the show today... The Yeast black market, the 'No Sports' Sports Report, & April Fools is cancelled