Cycle Breakers & Money Makers

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In this episode, I'm joined by my private client Natalia López-Thismón. Trigger warning for those of you who have experienced emotional abuse either in a relationship or have experienced religious trauma.

Natalia is a life coach, women's circle, and rites of passage facilitator dedicated to helping Latinas who feel stuck in lives they don’t want regain the radical self-trust to rewrite their stories, by developing the skill of self trust.

Her journey with self-care began during her divorce in 2015 when she discovered the power of caring for herself—a practice she had rarely seen modeled by the women around her due to cultural norms that discourage women from prioritizing their own needs. 

As the eldest daughter in a Puerto Rican and Venezuelan family, Natalia is committed to breaking this cycle and creating new narratives for herself and others. She views self-care as a radical act of healing and the first step toward developing self trust.

In this episode, Natalia shares her personal story of navigating a strict upbringing, how Marianismo impacts women's self trust, leaving an abusive marriage and ultimately her church.

And it all started with self care, which allowed Natalia to develop the self trust needed to rewrite her story one decision at a time - a process she now walks her clients through.

But we're not talking bubble baths and massages. Natalia illustrates how self-care is more about taking care of yourself starting from your most basic needs vs the commercialized version we often get sold.

Get in touch with Natalia:

• Download the Self Care Menu + Self Care to Self Trust email series
• Instagram
• TikTok

Episode takeaways

• Cultural expectations can heavily influence identity.
• Marianismo promotes self-sacrifice at the expense of women's self trust
• How and when religious conditioning can create barriers to self-trust.
• Leaving an abusive relationship was easier once self care rewired Natalia to trust herself
• Self-care leads to increased self-trust.
• Small promises to yourself build self-trust.
• Self-care is a revolutionary act of healing.
• Self-care is not about luxury and buying things

Chapters

• 03:00: Cultural Expectations and Marianismo
• 06:05: The Impact of Religion on Identity
• 11:59: The Turning Point: Leaving an Abusive Marriage
• 20:57: Building Confidence Through Self-Care
• 32:21: The Connection Between Self-Care and Self-Trust
• 41:44: Introducing the Self-Care Menu Tool
• 52:24: Self-Care as a Revolutionary Act

This year has been hard for a lot of businesses. Whether it's financially, emotionally, business model wise, etc., hitting a rough patch in business feels high stakes - because it is. So how do you problem solve when your nervous system is going into fight, flight, or freeze?

Sometimes, our emotions make us believe we don’t already have the answers to our problem. But that's not actually true. Problem solving and decision making are leadership skills that you can get coached on. With 15 sun skills, they are the top 2 EQ skills that come up with my clients.

So today, I'm going through 6 steps to problem solve when things aren't going your way in business.

Here's a quick sneak peak:

1. Identify the circumstance or thing you are struggling with

Remember, you can solve for facts, not thoughts. So be careful how you're framing this!

2.Identify the emotion you have towards it. Let it be okay that it’s there.

3.Ask yourself: what’s the real problem: is there actually a problem to solve or just a feeling to feel? 

4.Neutralize the problem

5. Put all of your options on the table, even if you don’t like them.

If you’ve decided there’s a PROBLEM to solve not just a feeling to feel you HAVE to do something different. Or, make peace with the problem being there.

6.Just get into MOTION

Finding your way out of the fog doesn’t happen when you stand still, you have to walk around

Tune into this episode if you're feeling a bit discouraged in your life and business lately. I think you'll feel a renewed sense of possibility and movement after listening!

Connect with me:

• Instagram
• Website
• LinkedIn

Have you ever felt like you're trying to convince people that your offers are "worth it"? Well, the problem is probably not your offers, it's your messaging.

You know the power of the transformation you provide for clients! So together, let's lock down marketing that helps you skip right past price objections and unaligned clients. In today's episode, I want to give you the tools you need to attract totally aligned clients through your messaging.

Imagine you're on stage and you have people sitting in the front row, all eyes on you. But you also have others sitting in the middle talking to each other, going to get popcorn, standing by the wall chatting, and you've even got people who haven't entered the theater at all.

Ask yourself: who are you talking to? Are you going to expend all your energy trying to reach the people at the popcorn stand? Or will you opt to speak to the people that are already listening?

If you decide you're ready to talk to directly to the people in the front row, this episode is for you. Because at the end of the day, getting specific about who you help will make it possible for you to make a bigger impact. And getting intentional about how you speak to them will make it easier to call them into your space.

Here's 5 ways to attract higher level clients and opportunities:

1. Imagine your best clients when you write and when you make decisions in your business.
2. Think of the most sophisticated problems you solve and who has them
3. Watch your tone. Speak to them with respect in your marketing.
4. You HAVE to start do more than centering your own success story in your marketing.
5. More thought leadership and context. Less right vs wrong.

And bonus points for using your thought leadership to gain Third Party Credibility!

Connect with me:

• Instagram
• Website
• LinkedIn

If you're going to land speaking opportunities (using the tips from my episode #50), you're going to have to get comfortable being visible. And here's the thing: Women of Color don't have an ability problem, they have a visibility problem.

Think about it, who do you usually see portraying the CEOs of companies on screen? Usually, a white man. Sometimes a white woman. Visibility is often needed to make more money. And I want to be really intentional about not making a systemic issue a mindset issue. Let's be clear: Visibility is hard because of oppression, note because it's a personality trait.

Even my super successful ex corporate women who climbed the ladder are not immune to this. I coach women who are Directors at Google, who have been SVPs, who worked for the United Nations. And across the board, visibility is hard for us. Being seen can feel unsafe because we've been overly criticized for out natural way of being and had unforgiving standards put on us growing up.

So here's 7 steps to make visibility easier:

1. Acknowledge the emotion.
2. Validate why it’s hard.
3. Ask LESS of the thing you’re doing. 
4. What do I need in order to increase my capacity to do this?
5. Rank visibility in terms of what you have the capacity for. 
6. Embrace it as a journey vs destination.

Tune in to episode 51 for the why and how behind each of these steps!

Connect with me:

• Website
• Linkedin
• Instagram

Today's topic is inspired by the celebration of two major things: Hispanic Heritage Month and reaching episode 50 of Cycle Breakers and Money Makers! I know that Hispanic Heritage Month brings a lot of opportunity for speaking engagements, if you know how to play your cards right.

So in today's episode, I'm breaking down how to be approached to speak in the next 30 days without having to individually pitch yourself.

We'll start with how to find aligned opportunities in the first place. Because here's the thing: right now, a lot of the public calls for speakers are nothing but engagement bait. So how can you move with intention so you know you're not wasting your time?

Then, I'll lay out a step by step process for actually landing the speaking engagements that will move the needle for your career. A lot of people pitching with good intentions are falling flat and losing opportunities because they're missing crucial steps.

So by the end of this episode, I want you to feel totally prepared to go out there and land real opportunities that actually ALIGN with your values and your ideal audience.

Because I don't believe that just ANY visibility is good visibility.

In this episode, I'm chatting about:

• The 3 speaking topics + 3 teaching topics to come prepared to pitch
• How to avoid engagement bait and find the right opportunities
• Creating an "I Help" statement for you as a speaker
• What to do once you actually land a gig

Connect with me:

• Instagram
• Linkedin
• Website

I made my first half a million without formulaic strategies that we're constantly told we "need" to make money. My posts didn't have call to actions and my website didn't feature my offers. So how did I do it? That's what we're digging into today.

I literally had friends asking me "Mariela, how are you selling out? I feel like I never see you selling." Here's the thing: when we get so caught up in templates and strategies, we can forget  the power of storytelling, simplicity, and authenticity in business.

I turned my sales call notes that were living in a Google doc into a whole coaching program outline. It starts with the power of attention. This google doc eventually allowed me to support a five figure offer and stay booked out 3-4months ahead of time!

Some of the bells and whistles that are touted as "non-negotiables" are actually more like the cherry on top. Your business can thrive before you have the professional branding, omni-channel marketing, and a full team.

Here are the things that were actually non-negotiable for me to create 80K in two months before:

1. Thought leadership and speaking to a true gap.
2. I led with my stories and repeated them often.
3. I let myself be human > expert. 
4. Instead of repeating a promise over and over, I spoke to one person one problem, and one person one possibility at a time.
5. Possibility aware vs problem aware. I taught them how to show up to the decision of working with me.

Connect with me:

• Instagram
• Linkedin
• Website

Ready for a free coaching session? In this episode, take notes while I take you through the visual I use with clients to help them do things that scare them. Sometimes, we get caught in fight, flight, fawn or freeze responses. Especially as entrepreneurs, we're constantly coming up against circumstances that are just...not normal.

So, let's pretend you've just been invited to do a TedTalk style speech for a very well-known vitamin brand. I use this an example because this is currently happening in Reclamation right now. We've also had people land actual TedTalks and have used this process with them as well.

Tons of thoughts might be coming up. Things like - What if they say my price is too much? What if I mess up? What if they don't like me? Do I actually have time for this? And on, and on.

So..how can you get out of these thought spirals and actually move towards something that scares you?

The answer is: Get in touch with what I call your Internal Boardroom. This is an introduction to parts work - a key focus in therapy and business/life coaching. It's kind of like the movie Inside Out.

By the end of this episode, you're going to have the tools you need to understand yourself on a deeper level. And when you understand yourself, you can work with all of your inner voices to get out of trauma responses that might be holding you back.

In this episode, we're chatting about:

• What is Parts Work?
• Defining the parts of yourself:
• The Inner Child
• The Higher Self
• The Role Self
• Mine are characterized as:
• Clipboard Mariela
• Publicist Mariela
• An exercise to work with the different parts of yourself
• How to determine which part is holding the mic in the Boardroom meeting

Connect with me:

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• Website
• LinkedIn

Don't bypass your natural gifts. As daughters of immigrants, it can feel more natural to recognize and focus on our flaws. For me, it's so easy to recognize these core strengths in my friends. But when it comes to me, sometimes I need a reminder.

So I wanted to take some time to remind you of your strengths. Even if I don't know you, I know the experience of daughters of immigrants. I actually recorded this episode while on vacation in Puerto Vallarta with four close friends. I always love reconnecting with these friends and sharing stories because it reminds me of how connected we really are as daughters of immigrants.

Not only am I highlighting the natural strengths of daughters of immigrants, I'm also giving actionable tips to put these strengths to good use. Because for every strength comes an equal and opposite achilles heel. With intentionality and awareness, we can make sure that all of our strengths serve us instead of make life and business harder.

Here are the 5 natural strengths we'll be digging into:

• You're highly emotionally intelligent

You are HIGHLY influential if you allow yourself to be. Tune in to hear how you can hone this.

• You know how to make the most of any resource you have (space, time, money, support system)

You're probably overdelivering in so many aspects of your life and you're not giving yourself credit for it.

• You can access more fluidity than most people

You're part of multiple worlds. Because of that, you naturally know how to see other people's point of view. This is GREAT for marketing.

• You care DEEPLY

Because you have had a higher level of responsibility than most people from a young age, you're naturally inclined to take care. And if you truly care, it's impossible to fail.

• You're resilient

We have the most incredible stories. We just have to learn how to tell them.

Connect with me:

• Instagram
• Website
• LinkedIn

When you're building a legacy, you will inevitably come up against push back from loved ones, especially if you’re First Gen. Today's guest, Maya Elious, is taking us behind the scenes on her journey of building a 7 figure business as a daughter of immigrants.

A major takeaway? Sometimes entrepreneurship as a daughter of immigrants means that you have to get really comfortable making decisions that your loved ones can't understand until they can see it in retrospect.

Maya Elious is an award-winning business coach and personal branding strategist. She is the CEO of Built To Impact, a coaching and consulting company that teaches overlooked experts how to build a profitable online business in their zone of genius.

Her biggest piece of advice for her younger self that was still holding out for approval? "Drop out sooner." At 23, she left college because she knew she had unlocked a real opportunity with her business. Did she initially get the support she hoped for from her family? Absolutely not. Was it ultimately worth it? Absolutely.

I'm excited for you to hear all about Maya's journey - from making $35-$60 per client each month as an 18-year old to hitting that million dollar mark many times over and launching multiple brands, we're digging into the mindset that made this possible for her.

In this episode, we're chatting about:

• Redefining success as First Gen
• How to build a personal brand online without trauma dumping
• The self-trust required to drop out of college and pursue business full time
• How Maya has been able to navigate increased visibility without self-sabotaging
• Scaling your business from the six-figure mark to millions

Connect with Maya:

• Build Your Brand Checklist
• Website
• Listen to Work Hard Live Soft

Connect with me:

• Website
• Instagram
• Linkedin

This episode is the heart and soul of what I do and why my business exists, which is to solve a huge gap in the mentorship and coaching space, for daughters of immigrants specifically.

I was able to see this gap because I experienced it firsthand. I achieved it all in school, college and corporate. But when I started my business back in 2019, entrepreneurship required me to unlearn a lot my belief systems and my Self Concepts that came from being First Gen.

At the time I did market research, speaking to dozens of daughters of immigrants and I began seeing the common challenges they experienced behind visibility, self trust, thought leadership and sales.

And now after having coached over 100 daughters of immigrants from origin countries all over the world, those approaches are clearer than ever.

Today, I'm breaking down the patterns that affect how daughters of immigrants show up in business and leadership, where these patterns comes from, and a new ways of integrating these experiences.

That's why daughters of immigrants need to be mentored differently. Certain advice and strategies may be helpful for others, will only further the disconnect between ourselves and our business.

Here are a few key issues we face as First Gen leaders :

• You are still figuring out who you are as an adult
• Financial scarcity based on being one generation removed from not having enough
• Being our parents retirement plan
• Standing out was usually met with criticism or punishment so it affects visibility and thought leadership
• Emotions were often seen as a bad thing, yet they are REQUIRED of business. 
• Being WILDLY uncomfortable with not being "productive" at all times
• Growing up too fast = holding yourself to unrealistic expectations now
• Growing up with hypervigilance means you're always looking for signs of danger even when there is none there

If you resonated with this episode, know that you have a goldmine of gifts at your disposal. But part of your journey as a business owner is unlearning a lot of the survival mode behaviors you still carry as First Gen SO THAT you can make more money, become more visible and own your thought leadership.

You are a walking miracle.

With that, I invite you to work with me. I have added new ways to work w/ me privately. I have expanded my coaching to span from 3 -6 months so we can deep dive into both your life AND business, and the specific areas keeping you from your next level of growth.

Connect with me:

• Instagram
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• Website