Disagree better

Disagree better

By Tammy LenskiSociety & Culture
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Disagree better episodes

  • The key to handling arguments about respect

    Feeling dissed? Here’s how to raise concerns about disrespect in a way that increases dialogue and decreases pushback.

    Find the transcript with links here.

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    5 min
  • A relationship conflict resolution tool you want for your toolbox
    Thinking about the future helps couples overcome relationship conflict and view the situation in a more reasoned and positive light, according to new research. Here’s how to use the researchers’ simple mental exercise to create psychological distance from a conflict and dial down the heat of an argument.
    Show notes
    The University of Waterloo study
    5 uncomplicated ways to gain psychological distance during conflict
    0 min
  • You want this mental device in your relationship conflict toolbox

    Thinking about the future helps couples overcome relationship conflict and view the situation in a more reasoned and positive light, according to new research. Here’s how to use the researchers’ simple mental exercise to create psychological distance from a conflict and dial down the heat of an argument.

    Find the transcript with links here.

    To receive transcripts of new episodes automatically, subscribe at tammylenski.com/subscribe/.

    4 min
  • Don’t bury anger’s lede
    During conflict, focusing mostly on anger's behavior instead of on anger's real message is like burying the lede in a news story.
    Show notes
    Nora Ephron's story about high school journalism class
    0 min
  • The real message anger is trying to deliver

    During conflict, focusing mostly on anger’s behavior instead of on anger’s real message is like burying the lede in a news story.

    Find the transcript with links here.

    To receive transcripts of new episodes automatically, subscribe at tammylenski.com/subscribe/.

    4 min
  • 3 everyday practices for becoming a better listener

    In this episode



    You don’t get better at listening during conflict by practicing during conflict. You get better at listening during conflict by practicing outside of conflict, where the stakes are lower and it’s easier to be on top of your game. Here are three easy ways to practice giving your full attention and being a good listener



    Show notes



    * Good negotiators persuade with their ears* The Art of Racing in the Rain (amazon affiliate link)* One reason well-worn habits can feel hard to change* The secret good mediators know about listening (image you can download and print)
    6 min
  • Be a better listener with these 3 everyday practices

    It’s hard to get better at listening during conflict by practicing during conflict. If you want to be a better listener, practice outside of a difficult conversation. The stakes will be lower and it’ll be easier to be on top of your game. Here are three simple ways to practice being a good listener in everyday life.

    Find the transcript with links here.

    To receive transcripts of new episodes automatically, subscribe at tammylenski.com/subscribe/.

    7 min
  • Resolve conflict better in 30-second increments
    Strengthening your conflict resolution chops isn’t about learning a new skill and then trying to use it in your most difficult conversations. Just as you wouldn’t start running and try a marathon the following week, acquiring more successful conflict resolution habits is about a slow, steady build. Start with 30-second chunks.
    Show notes
    Practice empathic listening
    Don't have a confrontation; ask a single question
    Practice staying curious in conflict, even when you don't feel like it
    Use this quick mini-meditation to calm yourself in the middle of a difficult conversation
    Practice persuading by asking the right questions
    0 min
  • 30 seconds to better conflict resolution

    Note: An updated version of this episode is available here. 

    Better conflict resolution habits don’t start with learning a new approach and then trying it in your next difficult conversation. Just as you wouldn’t start running and try a marathon the following week, better conflict resolution habits begin with a slow, steady build. Here are some ways to start strong and build from there.

    Find the transcript with links here.

    To receive transcripts of new episodes automatically, subscribe at tammylenski.com/subscribe/.

    5 min

About Disagree better

From the publisher's feed

How we handle conflict has an impact on the resilience of our vital relationships, the caliber of our decisions, the success of our careers, and our peace of mind. Mediator, conflict resolution…

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