Practice Advantage

Dissecting Difficult Conversations with Erin O'Malley


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In this episode, I sit down with culture catalyst Erin O'Malley to discuss the reasons we don't like difficult conversations and having to provide constructive feedback to friends, colleagues, and employees. 

Key Takeaways:

  1. Many don't like having difficult conversations due to the effects it could have on the relationship. We play "What If?" games for the negative, yet we should really look at the positive "What If?" outcomes that could come from having the conversation.
  2. Consider shifting away from the feedback sandwich - it can cause whiplash and leave your employee focusing either on the negative or the positive (and they miss the constructive). As Dr. Brené Brown puts it, "Clear is kind."
  3. Erin's framework for difficult conversations:
    1. Intention - Sets our intention and guides the conversation
    2. Framing - Seeing the specific situation and behavior of the individual
    3. Impact - What's the impact the person's behavior is having on the business case
    4. Inputs - Ask questions and bring the other person in
    5. Invite - Invite them into the conversation and the solution
  4. Feedback is a two way street. The inputs and pulling them in to the conversation, asking them how they feel or think about the challenge is really important. Be present.
  5. As you frame the difficult conversation, avoid talking about subjective issues. Address the objective actions and behaviors head on.

What Erin is reading:

  • Say What You Mean by Oren Sofer
...more
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