Divorce Dialogues

Divorce Dialogues

By Katherine MillerSociety & Culture
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Divorce Dialogues episodes

  • Is Your Soon-to-Be-Ex-Spouse Hiding Money? With Tracey Coenen
    Do you suspect that your soon-to-be-ex-spouse is hiding money?
    If your partner is trying to avoid equitable distribution in a divorce settlement, they might be keeping assets from you or transferring money into a secret account.
    But is it necessary to hire a forensic accountant? Or can you do the job yourself?
    Tracey Coenen is a renowned forensic accountant and the brains behind the Divorce Money Guide. She is also the author of the book Find Me the Money and host of the podcast of the same name.
    Tracey is passionate about helping people who feel powerless in the divorce process regain their confidence and take control of their money.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Tracey joins Katherine to explain how to identify when your spouse is hiding money and where they might be keeping it.
    Tracey walks us through the common reasons why people hide money in a marriage and describes why financial infidelity is just as devastating as romantic infidelity—if not more.
    Listen in for Tracey’s insight on initiating the conversation around money in your marriage and learn the first steps to educating yourself about the family finances in divorce.
    Topics Covered
    How your relationship with money impacts the way you handle finances in a marriage
    Why we need to change the language we use to talk about money in divorce
    How to identify when your spouse is hiding money and where they might be keeping it
    When to hire a forensic accountant (and when you can do the job yourself)
    How Tracey’s Divorce Money Guide helps you understand the financial piece of divorce
    The most common reasons why people hide money in a marriage
    What makes financial infidelity just as devastating as romantic infidelity
    Why talking about money in a marriage is so challenging and how to initiate the conversation
    Why Tracey suggests listing all the accounts you know about as the first step in getting more financial information
    The benefit of regularly running a credit report on yourself and exchanging that information with your spouse
    What Tracey says to women who want to educate themselves about the family finances
    How knowing where you’re spending gives you power to create the life you want
    Connect with Tracey Coenen
    Fraud Coach:
    https://www.fraudcoach.com/dd
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Divorce Money Guide:
    https://www.fraudcoach.com/
    Find Me the Money: Take Control, Uncover the Truth, and Win the Money You Deserve in Your Divorce by Tracey Coenen:
    https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BYFCRMJR?&linkCode=sl1&tag=sequenceinc-20&linkId=ee67be01fe036601f36861168c84e524&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl
    Find Me the Money Podcast:
    https://www.fraudcoach.com/podcast
    28 min
  • From Victim Mentality to Empowered Life Post-Divorce With, Kimberly Kelley
    What story are you telling yourself about your divorce?
    Blaming your ex may seem justified, but that story only gets you stuck in a victim mentality with no control over your own life.
    So, how do you rewrite your story and start building an empowered life post-divorce?
    Kimberly Kelley is the neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) practitioner and hypnotherapist behind Reinvent Yourself, a program that helps newly single people create the life they want.
    She is also the author of No Blame No Shame: Living an Empowered Life After Divorce, where she describes the profound changes she made after her own marriage of 30 years came to an end.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Kimberly joins Katherine to discuss how the stories we tell ourselves affect our experience of divorce.
    Kimberly explains how the internal shame of another failed marriage drove her fears around what other people would think and describes how hypnotherapy empowered her to imagine a life beyond divorce.
    Listen in for Kimberly’s advice on navigating a divorce you didn’t choose and learn how NLP can help you reframe your divorce as a growth opportunity rather than a mistake!
    Topics Covered
    How NLP is the study of how we communicate with ourselves
    How we can leverage neuro-linguistic programming to live a more empowered life
    How the stories we tell ourselves affect our experience of divorce
    How Kimberly’s internal shame drove her fears of what other people would think of her divorce
    Reframing your negative self-talk around divorce into something constructive
    How Kimberly helps people reframe their divorce story as a growth opportunity vs. a mistake
    Why blaming your ex-spouse puts you into a victim mentality
    Why Kimberly suggests exploring what you got out of your marriage
    How Kimberly uses hypnotherapy to help people imagine a life beyond divorce
    Kimberly’s advice for navigating a divorce you didn’t choose
    Connect with Kimberly Kelley
    Body Mind Spirit Healing Arts:
    https://kimberly-kelley.com/
    Kimberly on Facebook:
    https://www.facebook.com/kimberly.dyer.kelley
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    No Blame No Shame: Living an Empowered Life After Divorce by Kimberly Kelley:
    https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C6YPXH3J?ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_9TSY3G3AE7589AQ5ARWK&tag=kpembed-20&linkCode=kpe
    Peggy McColl’s Power Life Script:
    https://go.peggymccoll.com/powerlifescript-special-promotion
    27 min
  • Divorce Advice from the Kids’ Perspective With Grace Casper
    Wonder what your kids are experiencing during the divorce process? What if you could ask adult children of divorce for advice?
    Grace Casper became a child of divorce at the age of eight. By age 10, she had written the first draft of her book, Dear Parents: Notes from a Child of Divorce by Grace Casper.
    Today, Grace runs Divorce Tips from Kids, a platform dedicated to helping families navigate divorce, and hosts Divorce: What I Wish My Parents Knew, a podcast about divorce from the kids’ perspective.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Grace joins Katherine to describe the pressure she felt to be the source of her parents’ happiness after their divorce.
    Grace explains what inspired her to write about her parents’ divorce and how we can apply Grace’s story in Dear Parents to our own individual circumstances.
    Listen in for insight on the commoditization of kids in divorce negotiations and learn how Grace’s resources can help you improve the experience of divorce for your children.
    Topics Covered
    What adult children of divorce would like to go back in time and tell their parents
    The pressure Grace felt to be the source of her parents’ happiness after their divorce
    Why so many children of divorce see themselves as peacekeepers
    The power of apologizing to your child when you make a mistake as a parent
    What inspired Grace to journal about her parents’ divorce when she was 10 years old
    How Grace turned her original 10 tips for kids into a book for divorced parents
    How Grace learned to let go of her bitterness & resentment and forgive her dad
    How you can apply Grace’s advice in Dear Parents to your own situation
    How divorce lawyers, coaches and therapists can use Grace’s resources to serve clients
    How Grace thinks about the commoditization of kids in divorce negotiations
    Grace’s advice on keeping your children at the forefront of your thinking in divorce
    Connect with Grace Casper
    Divorce Tips from Kids:
    https://www.divorcetipsfromkids.com/
    Divorce Tips on Instagram:
    https://www.instagram.com/divorcetipsfromkids/
    Divorce Tips on Facebook:
    https://www.facebook.com/divorcetipsfromkids/
    Divorce: What I Wish My Parents Knew Podcast:
    https://www.divorcetipsfromkids.com/podcast
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Dear Parents: Notes from a Child of Divorce by Grace Casper:
    https://www.divorcetipsfromkids.com/dear-parents-notes-from-a-child-of-divorce
    27 min
  • How to Manage the Anxiety of Divorce With Bernadette Purcell
    Worried thoughts about the future generate anxiety. And divorce begets an uncertain future.
    So, it’s no surprise that anxiety is such a common emotion in divorce.
    But how do you navigate that anxiety without getting overwhelmed in the process?
    Bernadette Purcell is Founder of Shore Behavioral Health, a practice that helps patients with anxiety disorders enjoy more fulfilling lives and supports individuals and couples through all phases of divorce.
    A licensed clinical social worker in private practice since 2008, Bernadette is also the author of Divorced as F* in Seven Spiritual Steps.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Bernadette joins Katherine to discuss how worry impacts the divorce process and what to do about it.
    Bernadette explains how to prevent worry from turning into anxiety, challenging you to surrender to the fact that divorce is happening and leverage acceptance to take the next right step for you.
    Listen in for insight on getting comfortable with uncertainty and learn Bernadette’s top stress management interventions for managing the anxiety of divorce.
    Topics Covered
    How thoughts about the future generate anxiety
    Bernadette’s strategy for bringing yourself back to the present moment
    How to prevent worry from turning into anxiety
    What inspired Bernadette to write Divorced as F*
    How Bernadette defines spirituality as learning something that resonates and then truly living it
    Why it’s crucial to surrender to the fact that divorce is happening
    Why it’s a mistake to discontinue stress management interventions when you start to feel better
    How anxiety impacts the divorce process
    Bernadette’s advice for getting comfortable with uncertainty
    What to do if divorce is making you anxious about the future
    Connect with Bernadette Purcell
    Shore Behavioral Health:
    http://www.shorebehavioralhealth.net/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Divorced as F* in Seven Spiritual Steps by Bernadette Purcell:
    https://www.bernadettepurcell.com/
    27 min
  • A New Approach to Conflict Resolution in Divorce With Jacinta Gallant
    Divorce makes us feel vulnerable. And many of us lawyer up and come out swinging to protect ourselves.
    But what if there’s a more effective way to reach an agreement with your ex? What if a little self-reflection early on can help you improve the process of working with a divorce professional?
    Jacinta Gallant is a respected lawyer, mediator and educator recognized internationally for her innovative approach to conflict resolution training.
    Jacinta’s Our Family in Two Homes resources for divorce professionals help their clients prepare for effective dispute resolution.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Jacinta joins Katherine to share her journey from cutthroat divorce litigator to effective mediator, describing how she leverages curiosity to understand clients on a deeper level and deliver what they need.
    Jacinta walks us through the reflection questions she encourages people to ask themselves before they meet with a divorce lawyer and explains how divorce attorneys serve clients better when they don’t pretend to have all the answers.
    Listen in to understand why people who take the ‘high road’ get better deals than those who come out swinging and get Jacinta’s advice on using divorce as an opportunity for self-discovery and catalyst for a better life!
    Topics Covered
    Jacinta’s journey from cutthroat divorce litigator to effective mediator
    Why divorce attorneys can’t serve clients well when we pretend to have all the answers
    How Jacinta leverages curiosity to understand clients on a deeper level and deliver what they need
    What Jacinta learned by asking clients what it was like to work with her
    How Jacinta’s reflection questions help clients get to know themselves better
    How Jacinta’s Our Family in Two Homes workbook is delivered through the services of a collaborative divorce professional
    The benefit of reflecting on your hopes and fears re: parenting and finances before you meet with a divorce lawyer
    Why people who take the ‘high road’ get better deals than those who come out swinging
    Divorce as an opportunity for self-discovery + catalyst for a better life
    Connect with Jacinta Gallant
    Jacinta’s Website:
    https://jacintagallant.ca/
    The Authentic Professional Podcast:
    https://open.spotify.com/show/2WY6tXaASxiQkXBWebQmSY
    Our Family in Two Homes:
    https://intwohomes.com/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Dr. Cheryl Picard’s Insight Approach to Conflict Resolution:
    https://www.collaborativepractice.com/system/files/The Insight Approach and CP - essay.pdf
    Going Steady: A Toolkit for Building Our Future Together by Jacinta Gallant:
    https://goingsteadytoolkit.com/
    27 min
  • How to Stay Positive (Even During Divorce!)With Bill Carmody
    If your marriage is ending, you may be convinced that things will never be good again.
    But what if I told you there is a way to stay positive, even during a divorce? To feel less vulnerable in stressful situations? And change the dynamic of conversations with your ex?
    Bill Carmody serves as Chief Coaching Officer for Positive Intelligence, where he oversees the application of mental fitness for thousands of coaches worldwide.
    Bill is also the author of the bestselling book The 3 Rules of Marriage, and he is dedicated to being an inspirational leader who creates breakthroughs for himself and solves problems for others.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Bill joins Katherine to explain how Positive Intelligence strategies can help you be less reactive in stressful situations and stay positive regardless of your circumstances.
    Bill shares his approach to making progress in high-conflict conversations, challenging us to develop mental fitness and stop the cycle of judgement when we feel criticized by our ex.
    Listen in for Bill’s PQ Reps exercise for dropping into your fully present self and learn how to leverage Positive Intelligence to focus on the outcomes you want during a divorce.
    Topics Covered
    How Positive Intelligence helps us stay positive regardless of our circumstances
    What happens when we let our emotions run us in the process of divorce
    Using Positive Intelligence to feel less vulnerable and be less reactive in stressful situations
    How to adjust your autonomic nervous system to cultivate a sense of calm
    Bill’s PQ Reps exercise for dropping into your body and being fully present in the moment
    Bill’s strategies for changing the dynamic of conversations in high-conflict circumstances
    How mental fitness allows you to focus on the outcome you want in divorce
    Bill’s 3 rules of marriage (don’t keep score, show appreciation & don’t go to bed angry)
    Why we tend to judge others when we feel criticized and how to stop that cycle
    How PQ Reps can help people who are contemplating or navigating divorce
    Why Bill recommends coaching to help you focus on what’s important in divorce
    Connect with Bill Carmody
    Positive Intelligence:
    https://www.positiveintelligence.com/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    The 3 Rules of Marriage by Bill and Elena Carmody:
    https://www.threerulesofmarriage.com/free
    The Saboteur Assessment:
    https://www.positiveintelligence.com/saboteurs/
    28 min
  • Leveraging Integrative Nutrition to Detox from Divorce With Suzy Wood
    According to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, divorce is the second most stressful life event after the death of a spouse.
    And that stress has an impact on our food choices and overall health.
    So, how might we leverage integrative nutrition to make positive, lasting lifestyle changes while we’re coping with divorce?
    Suzy Wood is the Integrative Nutrition Health Coach behind True Wellness Within, a platform that helps people make healthy food and lifestyle choices and rebuild their lives after the stress of divorce.
    Suzy’s divorce was a calling card to reinvent herself, inspiring her to leave a career in high tech marketing to start her own business and live her best life.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Suzy joins Katherine to discuss the 12 lifestyle factors that must be in balance for you to live a healthy life.
    Suzy shares tips for finding an avenue for self-care to help you detox during or after divorce and discusses the importance of discerning what divorce advice works for you—and what doesn’t.
    Listen in for Suzy’s techniques to navigate the stressful moments of a divorce negotiation and learn how to leverage divorce as an opportunity to transform your life!
    Topics Covered
    How divorce gave Suzy the opportunity to transform her outlook on life
    How integrative nutrition looks at both lifestyle factors and the foods you eat
    The 12 lifestyle factors that must be in balance for you to live a healthy life
    How the stress of divorce impacts our food choices and overall health
    Suzy’s tips for finding an avenue for self-care to detox during/after divorce
    Why Suzy suggests having an outlet to discuss divorce beyond friends and family
    How to discern what divorce advice works for you and what doesn’t
    What Suzy says to people who are afraid of divorce and don’t know what to do
    How Suzy’s coaching program helps people make lasting lifestyle changes
    Stress-reduction techniques to use during triggering events in divorce
    Connect with Suzy Wood
    True Wellness Within:
    https://www.truewellnesswithin.com/
    True Wellness on Instagram:
    https://www.instagram.com/truewellnesswithin/
    Suzy on LinkedIn:
    https://www.linkedin.com/in/suzanne-wood-true-wellness-within/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Divorce Detox Facebook Group:
    https://www.facebook.com/groups/1634325603620269
    27 min
  • A Coparenting Arrangement That Puts Kids First With Bill DeSalvo
    Traditional coparenting arrangements put the focus on the divorcing couple. They establish new, separate households, and the kids go back and forth.
    But what happens if you shift your focus and build a coparenting plan around the children?
    When Bill DeSalvo’s ex-wife introduced him to the idea of nesting, he had misgivings. But he was open to the alternative because of its benefits for his kids.
    On the last episode of Divorce Dialogues, Bill’s ex-wife, Beth Behrendt, walked us through the fundamentals of nesting, a coparenting strategy in which the children stay in the family home and the parents move in and out.
    Today, Bill joins Katherine to discuss the experience of nesting from his perspective, sharing the logistical questions he had around how it would work and how their arrangement has evolved over time.
    Bill explains what he learned about himself through nesting and describes the mutual respect he and Beth established by putting rules in place early on.
    Listen in for Bill’s advice on building structure into a nesting arrangement without ‘scoreboarding’ and find out if you have what it takes to make nesting work for your family.
    Topics Covered
    What differentiates nesting from traditional coparenting arrangements
    How nesting puts the focus on the children vs. the couple getting divorced
    Why Bill was receptive when his ex-wife introduced the idea of nesting
    The logistical questions Bill had around how nesting would work
    How Bill and his ex-wife’s nesting arrangement has evolved over time
    What Bill learned about himself and how he grew as a person through nesting
    Bill’s reaction to his ex-wife’s decision to write Nesting After Divorce
    Bill’s insight on what it takes to make a nesting arrangement work
    The rules Bill and his ex put in place early in their nesting arrangement
    How to build structure into a nesting arrangement without ‘scoreboarding’
    Connect with Bill DeSalvo
    Family Nesting:
    https://familynesting.org/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Beth Behrendt on Divorce Dialogues EP202:
    https://divorcedialogues.miller-law.com/make-divorce-easier-on-your-kids-with-nesting-with-beth-behrendt
    Nesting After Divorce: Co-Parenting in the Family Home by Beth Behrendt:
    https://www.amazon.com/Nesting-After-Divorce-Co-Parenting-Family/dp/1454949791/ref=sr_1_1?crid=39FZ0XEIJ3SN3&keywords=nesting+after+divorce&qid=1671135810&s=books&sprefix=nesting+after+dicorce%2Cstripbooks%2C74&sr=1-1
    25 min
  • Make Divorce Easier on Your Kids with Nesting With Beth Behrendt
    Separated parents often worry about the upheaval a divorce causes in their kids’ lives, especially the stress that comes with moving back and forth between two households.
    But what if you could give your children the security of staying in the family home?
    Nesting allows kids to do just that. And it’s the parents who move in and out.
    So, how does nesting work? Is it right for your family?
    Beth Behrendt is the author of Nesting After Divorce: Co-Parenting in the Family Home. A freelance writer and single mother of three, Beth has shared her nesting experiences in several national publications, including The New York Times and Psychology Today.
    She is also a regular contributor to Divorce Magazine and Laura Wasser’s It’s Over Easy. Beth built Family Nesting to offer advice to other families considering this unique approach to divorce.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Beth joins Katherine to explain why she and her ex-husband made the decision to try nesting and how the arrangement benefits their family.
    Beth shares her take on nesting temporarily to make the transition to divorce easier, describing what the arrangement looks like for her family and how it’s evolved over the last nine years!
    Listen in for Beth’s insight on explaining the nesting situation to a new dating partner and find out if co-parenting in the family home is right for you.
    Topics Covered
    How nesting allows kids to stay in the family home after divorce
    How Beth’s personal experience inspired her to write Nesting After Divorce
    Why Beth and her ex-husband made the decision to try nesting
    Beth’s take on nesting for a year or two to make the transition to divorce easier
    How Beth, her ex and her kids benefit from the nesting arrangement
    What the nesting arrangement looks like for Beth’s family (and how it evolved over the years)
    How Beth and her ex worked out who was responsible for what, e.g.: shopping, laundry, etc.
    Establishing rules re: introducing kids to new dating partners and allowing other adults to the nest
    How to explain the nesting situation to a new dating partner
    What qualities Beth’s ex has that made nesting work for them
    How nesting impacted Beth’s relationship with her ex and how it evolved over time
    Why nesting isn’t right for every family but can work for many
    Connect with Beth Behrendt
    Family Nesting:
    https://familynesting.org/
    Family Nesting on Facebook:
    https://www.facebook.com/familynesting.org
    Family Nesting on Twitter:
    https://twitter.com/familynesting
    Beth on Twitter:
    https://twitter.com/bethbehrendt?lang=en
    Beth on Instagram:
    https://www.instagram.com/bethbehrendt/?hl=en
    Beth on TikTok:
    https://www.tiktok.com/@bethbehrendt
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Nesting After Divorce: Co-Parenting in the Family Home by Beth Behrendt:
    https://www.amazon.com/Nesting-After-Divorce-Co-Parenting-Family/dp/1454949791/ref=sr_1_1?crid=39FZ0XEIJ3SN3&keywords=nesting+after+divorce&qid=1671135810&s=books&sprefix=nesting+after+dicorce%2Cstripbooks%2C74&sr=1-1
    It Doesn’t Have to Be That Way by Laura A. Wasser:
    https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/it-doesnt-have-to-be-that-way-how-to-divorce-without-destroying-your-family-or-bankrupting-yourself_laura-a-wasser/1636713/item/27286672/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=pmax_high_vol_midlist_under_%2410&utm_adgroup=&utm_term=&utm_content=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwmZejBhC_ARIsAGhCqncwxp8zb23HfEWYC7GEGIM50vaGJMsZnN9UVTJooWO507qOqOCYBtgaAmMIEALw_wcB#idiq=27286672&edition=8856959
    26 min
  • How to Heal Your Disappointing Love Life With Dr. Thomas Jordan
    At the beginning of a new romance, we’re not worried about repeating the unhealthy patterns that ended our previous relationships. We tell ourselves that this one is different.
    But statistics tell a different story.
    The divorce rate is 41% for first marriages, 60% for second marriages and 73% the third time around.
    So, what’s behind those dismal statistics? And what can we do to heal a disappointing love life?
    Dr. Thomas Jordan is a clinical psychologist and a psychoanalyst in private practice in New York City. He also serves on the faculty of the NYU Postdoctoral Program in Psychoanalysis.
    Dr. Jordan founded the Love Life Learning Center to help people strengthen their ability to form and sustain healthy relationships, and he is the author of Learn to Love: A Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life.
    On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Dr. Jordan joins Katherine to discuss the three features of a disappointing love life, describing how we unconsciously repeat unhealthy patterns learned in childhood.
    Dr. Jordan explains how to stop the generational transmission of unhealthy learning in relationships, challenging us to set up a marriage that nurtures the love experience and grows over time.
    Listen in to understand when your marriage can be saved and when it’s time to divorce—and learn the first steps to healing your disappointing love life.
    Topics Covered
    The unhealthy patterns Dr. Jordan noticed in his practice that inspired Learn to Love
    Dr. Jordan’s 3 features of a disappointing love life—repetition, replication and recreation
    The case study of a client whose childhood experience with a violent father informed her disappointing love life
    How we can’t control our experience of love but can set up a relationship that nurtures that experience
    What it looks like to stop the generational transmission of unhealthy learning in love relationships
    Dr. Jordan’s insight on the value in looking at divorce as a learning experience
    How an awareness of your psychological love life serves as the foundation of a growing relationship
    How to know whether your marriage can be saved or if it’s time for divorce
    Why after divorce is a good time to ‘work on your love life’
    The first steps to examining your own love life and moving it in a healthier direction
    Connect with Dr. Thomas Jordan
    Love Life Learning Center:
    https://lovelifelearningcenter.com/
    Love Life Learning Center on Facebook:
    https://www.facebook.com/Dr.ThomasJordan/?ref=tn_tnmn
    Love Life Learning Center on Twitter:
    https://twitter.com/LLLearningCtr
    Love Life Learning Center on Instagram:
    https://www.instagram.com/lovelifelearningcenter/
    Dr. Jordan on LinkedIn:
    https://www.linkedin.com/in/drthomasjordan/
    Connect with Katherine Miller
    The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
    Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
    Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
    The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
    Call (914) 738-7765
    Resources
    Learn to Love: A Guide to Healing Your Disappointing Love Life by Thomas Jordan, PhD:
    https://www.amazon.com/Learn-Love-Guide-Healing-Disappointing/dp/1543987877/ref=sr_1_1?crid=6UIMHWDD2O54&keywords=learn+to+love+guide+to+healing+your+disappointing+love+life&qid=1574997753&s=books&sprefix=Learn+to+Love,aps,147&sr=1-1
    26 min

About Divorce Dialogues

From the publisher's feed

Divorce Dialogues helps people navigate divorce with dignity, clarity, and perspective. Through thoughtful conversations with experts and practitioners, the show explores the emotional, financial, legal, and relational realities of divorce, so listeners can make better decisions, communicate more effectively, and move forward with greater confidence.