Doing Divorce Different with Lesa Koski

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. Linda’s advice is to understand all the stories our mind tells us about finances and money. We have something like 85k thoughts a day, and the majority of them are negative. Live in the present moment and be aware of the thoughts going through our brain, whether they are true, and how we can change them. Take little steps to make it happen. Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes; new releases every Tuesday. 

Resources

Linda Lingo’s Website

Lesa Koski Website  

Lesa’s Online Courses 

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

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Today I am joined by financial coach, Linda Lingo. Linda empowers women to help them repair their relationships with finances and make money their best friend. Did you know by the time we are seven years old, our financial story is already created in our minds? Throughout this episode, Linda gives many mindset shifts that can help us to change our story to allow a better relationship with finances. She talks about how we take our financial story into our relationships and marriage, which can be a cause for arguments and especially create issues during a divorce. Tune in today to learn your financial story; it’s never too late to make money your best friend and rewrite your financial story. 

In this episode:

[1:50] What inspired Linda to be a financial coach? [4:07] The first step in making money your best friend is to understand your beliefs about money. [7:30] How did Linda teach her children about money? [9:42] What was Linda’s takeaway from her childhood and learning about money? [11:30] How do our financial stories and beliefs impact your marriage? [12:57] What can someone do to uncover their financial story? [15:10] It's never too late to make money your best friend. [16:14] Linda gives us a couple of steps that people can take to feel more abundant with their money. [18:58] How is money like energy?

Key Takeaways:

Words are power, and they create energy. Make sure you are putting out believable statements. Small steps taken consistently achieve big results.

Quotes:

“Being in control of your finances gives you freedom, gives you security, gives you a feeling of abundance and gratitude.” - Linda Lingo

“Whatever our money stories or beliefs are, we bring those into our marriage.” - Linda Lingo

“When women can understand that they don't have to be afraid of money, that money can be their friend, they start setting up their finances in such a way that it supports them. And so, for many women, it's getting out of that scarcity mindset - I’m afraid, I don't know if I’m going to be ok, I don't know what my future looks like - you need to take the time to give yourself grace, number one, and number two that it's never too late to learn about how to make money your best friend.” - Linda Lingo

Guest Bio:

I started this business to provide tools and resources that help women gain clarity and confidence in their finances so they can move forward with their lives.

I want to empower women with smart money strategies so they can create a stress-free approach to money.

With over 30 years of experience in the financial industry, I have accumulated the knowledge and skill to understand your financial needs. More importantly, I have experienced most of these life events, thus giving me a first-hand understanding of what you are going through.

With my compassion and guidance, I will provide the right tools needed to make wealth a part of your everyday vocabulary.

Resources:

Linda Lingo’s Website

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. Kim Best wants us to remember that this situation is for now. Where you are is just for now, and it will get better. She also wants you to remember that as you go through the divorce process, it's easy to place blame on your soon-to-be ex-spouse; instead of assigning a label to them that they are a liar, change your mindset and wording to ‘my ex has lied, it doesn't mean that is who they are all the time’. Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes, new releases every Tuesday.

Resources

Best Conflict Solutions Website

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa Koski Online Courses

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Today I am joined by Kim Best, a nurse turned divorce mediator in Tennessee. Kim walks us through how she got into mediation and what opportunities she sees through mediation. She focuses on the opportunity and the positive ways to handle conflict and divorce vs. feeling regret years later. Kim talks with us about how our difficult circumstances impact our legacy and some of the great examples she has gotten to be a part of with mediation. This episode is full of juicy nuggets and great takeaways, so make sure to tune in!

In this episode:

[3:07] How did Kim get to where she is today? [10:04] What are the benefits of mediation? [13:56] What does Kim see as uses for mediation? [15:52] How do these moments create our legacy? [17:58] Kim gives some examples of good divorces she has witnessed.

Key Takeaways:

Mediation can be the difference between hope and regret. You can choose to look back and be proud of how you handled the divorce, or you can look back and regret how things happened. Mediation isn’t just for divorce. Mediation can be used for family issues, such as for elderly parents or other things going on where you need a mediator in the room. You can't control the outcome of what the other person does, but you can control who you're going to be during the process, and nobody can take that choice away from you.

Quotes:

“We are all never so narcissistic as when we’re in pain. Because when we’re in pain, it's all about us, and it's all about protecting us, even when we don't know we need protected. Biologically our brains and bodies don't know the difference between an insult and someone holding a gun to our head; both of those actions feel like life-threatening.” - Kim Best

“Good people have terrible moments because we’re people. We’re more than our worst moment.” - Kim Best

Guest Bio:

Kimberly Best  RN, MA is a TN Rule 31 listed Civil mediator and a TN Rule 31 trained Family Mediator, owner of Best Conflict Solutions (http://www.bestconflictsolutions.com ) focusing on Collaborative Problem Solving in Healthcare, Small Business Mediation and Conflict Management, Organizational Conflict, Elder Mediation, Family and Relationship Mediation, Dialogue Facilitation, and Conflict Coaching. She spent the first season of her career as a Registered Nurse in intensive care, trauma, and emergency medicine, where she cared for people in extreme need and gained valuable experience in the medical system. Kim attended graduate school at the University of North Carolina Charlotte in Clinical/Community Psychology.  She obtained a master’s degree in Conflict Management from Lipscomb University in Nashville, Tennessee. Kim also trained in Transformative Mediation at Hofstra University, Healthcare Mediation at the University of South Florida, and Restorative Practices at the International Institute of Restorative Practices. She is an active member of Mediators Beyond Borders International and a working member of the ACR Elder Mediation Professional Development Group.  She also serves on the board of the Tennessee Association of Professional Mediators.

Resources:

Best Conflict Solutions Website

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. When you go through something that feels hard, you can end the suffering a little quicker and look at it as a gift or an opportunity. When you go through something hard, ask yourself as soon as you can, “How can this be a gift in the future to me or someone close to me?” Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes and new releases every Tuesday.

Resources

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Mindset Episode

Feelings Wheel

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Today I am sharing some tools that can help you to view suffering differently. Shifting your focus during a difficult circumstance to look for the gifts or opportunities being shown to you instead of getting stuck in the situation can make a world of difference. I walk through three scenarios of realizing the amazing gifts I’ve received through challenging times. Tune in today to learn how to switch up your mindset.

In this episode:

[2:09] How do you approach your mindset and feelings? [3:56] What is a tactile way you can do a PQ Rep? [5:50] Why is meeting your prodigy brain essential to reduce suffering? [6:52] Lesa discusses the gift of pregnancy complications. [10:41] Lesa talks about the gift of adopting her daughter Sophia.

Key Takeaways:

Everything that happens is happening to you to teach you a lesson or give you a gift. Taking a step back from the complicated situation to look for gifts or opportunities can help you end suffering sooner. PQ Rep is a great tool to help calm the prodigy brain so you can find the lessons within challenging circumstances.

Quotes:

“If your feeling like you can’t circle out of it, sit with it for a second. Name it, feel it. Think, where do I feel this in my body, is it in my chest or stomach, what temperature is it, is it hot or is it cold? What color is it? All those things help you to become aware of that feeling.” - Lesa Koski

“Ask yourself, how could this be a gift? You can ask what can I learn from this so that moving forward, what I’ve gone through teaches me something.”- Lesa Koski

Resources:

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Mindset Episode

Feelings Wheel

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. The first step in changing your life is to decide that you want to get better. All wellness begins from the inside out, so if you are ready to change your worldview and your life, reach out to Keith or Sheila Hittner for an initial conversation, so they can steer you toward the best service. Also, make sure that you have good support while going through difficult times; if your support is toxic, it won’t help you move the peg forward. Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes, new releases every Tuesday.

Resources

Keith and Sheila Hittner Links

Keith and Sheila Hittner Website

Phone: (651) 775-9194

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Today I am joined by Keith and Sheila Hittner from Our Healthy Homes. Keith talks with us about his experience with divorce and raising his five children with Sheila. He talks about the struggles that he went through and how he supported his children through difficult circumstances. Sheila discusses how she bonded with Keith’s children and what got her started on her Healthy Homes program. Together they talk about how their experiences have played into their realty work, supporting different situations for clients, and the importance of bonding when a new adult comes into a family post-divorce. Tune in today to learn the four pillars of a healthy home and tips for introducing a new relationship post-divorce.

In this episode:

[1:15] Introduction to Keith and Sheila Hittner and their background. [5:32] Keith and Sheila share their lessons with bonding. [9:13] Keith talks about his experience with divorce, which included his five children. [13:05] As Keith looks back, does he think amicable mediation would have been an option for his divorce? [15:38] What was it like to send Keith’s children to their moms where the environment wasn’t good? [17:39] How old were Keith’s children when he and his ex-spouse went through their divorce? [18:30] What was it like for Sheila to bond with Keith’s children? [22:38] How does their experience with divorce play into their current reality work? [24:04] What are the four pillars of a healthy house? [25:17] What are the health items that Sheila is promoting? [28:37] What tools does Sheila use for her Healthy Homes program?

Key Takeaways:

When kids are involved, you are together whether you are married or not because there will always be circumstances where you need to participate together, such as birthday parties, holidays, weddings, etc. Some children will experience a sense of betrayal and guilt towards their biological parents when they bond with a step-parent. A healthy home means having the right real estate, ecosystem, and physical and mental health. If those four pillars aren’t all spoken to and worked on, then the roof is going to fall.

Guest Bio:

We believe that owning a home allows you and your family to put down roots and become established in the community. We believe that owning a home makes your family feel safe and more connected. We believe that families that own homes are more successful because they feel the pride of ownership and are modeling the American dream. We believe this dream is for everyone, no matter what the background, family structure, or anything else. These beliefs are central to everything that we do. Whether it is helping you buy or sell a home or helping you discover lifestyle choices that will make your home healthier. We believe that your home is central to your family life, and we want to be a resource to you, now and in the future.

Quotes:

“I just want everyone to know that there is an option that you don't have to fight it out in court.” - Lesa Koski

“When you don’t have your health, what do you have?” - Sheila Hittner

Resources:

Keith and Sheila Hittner Links

Keith and Sheila Hittner Website

Phone: (651) 775-9194

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

The Onward app was made for divorced parents to help track, share and split their children's expenses. Download The Onward App today for iOS or Android!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Saddle Up Segments are bite-size, bonus episodes offering one thing that our listeners can do right away to add value to their life. This week’s guest Rosie Wilby suggests that when you are going through the thick of a breakup or a difficult circumstance, move your body. Physical activity, exercising, and self-care connect you with your body and the world. What a great way to feel at peace! Like what you're hearing? Be sure to check out the full-length episodes, new releases every Tuesday.

Resources

Rosie Wilby's Website

Rosie Wilby's Twitter

Rosie Wilby on TikTok

The Breakup Monologues Instagram

Rosie Wilby's LinkedIn

The Breakup Monologues Book

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Today I am joined by award-winning U.K. comedian, author, and podcaster Rosie Wilby. Rosie delivers an empowering view of the unexpected joy of heartbreak. She offers the perspective of opportunities one can gain post-breakup and how society can begin to normalize that breakups can be positive and amicable. Rosie shares with us the idea behind her book, The Breakup Monologues, where she shares about several of the relationships she’s had that have come to an end. Tune in today to uncover the positives that can be gained through heartbreak.

In this episode:

Rosie provides some background on her book, The Breakup Monologues. What made Rosie want to share her past relationships in a book? What are Rosie's major lessons from her breakups? How can you see a breakup as a gift when you're in the thick of it? How many breakups does Rosie talk about in her book? We can start normalizing the idea that divorce can be positive and amicable. How to work through a situation if you feel trapped when desiring a divorce.

Key Takeaways:

Being single can allow us to step back and look at the trajectory of our life and how we want to live as individuals without the pull of what your partner might want. Relationships and marriage get really busy, and being able to step back after a breakup provides excellent opportunities. Breakups provide self-knowledge about what you want in a future relationship, what's important to you, identifying your needs, and what you want to do differently in your next relationship. When you are in the thick of a breakup, reach out and get support. Hire a therapist or talk to a friend who can be supportive. It should be someone who will empower you and lift you up vs. pull you down and speak negatively.

Quotes:

“I do feel that breakups, although they are incredibly painful and really difficult and really challenging times, they do provide an opportunity for reflection and growth, and they can be a catalyst for real positive change.” - Rosie Wilby

“Sometimes growing apart is really healthy growth. Sometimes we just grow individually and in good ways, but we happen to have gone in slightly different directions, and that's not a failing on our parts. We have this really toxic language, these binaries of success and failure, and somehow if we don't stay together, we’ve failed, whereas surely, if we've separated in a really healthy way, that might be really positive and really mature.” - Rosie Wilby

Guest Bio:

Rosie Wilby is an award-winning U.K. comedian, author, and podcaster who has appeared many times on BBC Radio 4 programmes including Woman's Hour, Saturday Live, and Four Thought. Her first book, Is Monogamy Dead?, was longlisted for the Polari First Book Prize and followed a trilogy of solo shows investigating the psychology of love and relationships. Her new book, The Breakup Monologues, is based on her acclaimed podcast of the same name and is published globally by Bloomsbury.

Resources

Rosie Wilby Website

Rosie Wilby's Twitter

Rosie Wilby on TikTok

The Breakup Monologues Instagram

Rosie Wilby's LinkedIn

The Breakup Monologues Book

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges.

Saddle Up Live Podcast