Send us a text

Dating doesn’t have to feel like a guessing game. We break down five clear red flags every Christian should watch for and show how trusting God, not the crowd, changes who you choose and how you choose. From spiritual alignment to character under pressure, we pull back the curtain on the patterns that predict a healthy marriage—or a painful one.

We start with the heart of it all: if someone pulls you away from God, isolates you from church, or mocks spiritual disciplines, that’s not love. Then we zoom into teachability and accountability—because an uncorrectable person becomes unleadable when life gets hard. We tackle dishonesty and secrecy, the silent killers that cloud conversations and erode peace. You’ll hear why watching how a date treats servers, coworkers, and family reveals who they are when no one’s grading their performance. And we unpack the cost of a partner with no vision or direction, plus how mismatched goals, theology, and values create constant friction.

Along the way, we challenge the myth that romance equals readiness. Infatuation is effortless; mature love is built on aligned values, shared purpose, and honest dialogue. So we trade surface talk for deeper questions: money habits, family history, conflict style, faith convictions, and life vision. We also invite community into the process—mentors, pastors, and trusted friends who can spot the warning signs you might miss. To close, we share five practical discernment keys: pray before you play, ask trusted voices, observe not excuse, look for fruit, and follow the Holy Spirit’s peace.

If you’re single, this is a guide to date with clarity and courage. If you’re advising someone you love, it’s a toolkit for wise counsel. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and tell us: which red flag or discernment key are you adding to your non-negotiables today?

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

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We unpack how an eleven-day journey became forty years and why our schedules often repeat the same loop. Four practical keys help us redeem time, seize kairos moments, and align daily choices with what lasts.

• the Exodus loop as a mirror for wasted time
• screen time, reruns, indecision and hidden drains
• numbering our days with humility and clarity
• trusting God’s hand over our times and seasons
• redeeming kairos opportunities instead of stalling
• four keys: audit and align, seize moments, live eternally, guard focus
• routines that anticipate fatigue and make good choices easy
• pruning good things to make room for God things
• choosing presence with God, family, service and calling

If this was a blessing to you, make sure that you share this with other people because there's so many people out there that are wasting their time. If you're new to our podcast, hit the subscribe button if you're on YouTube or hit the icon so you can be the first to get the content. We drop a new episode every Thursday, 3 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. If you want to grab hold of a ticket, you can jump over to the website in our show notes below.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
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https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

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Has your relationship started to feel more like routine than romance? 😬 You’re not alone — most couples hit seasons where the spark fades and connection feels distant. But it doesn’t have to stay that way.

In this episode, Pastors Ken & Tabatha Claytor get real about what causes relationships to lose their spark and share 5 practical ways to bring it back — emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Whether you’ve been married for 2 years or 20, these truths will help you reconnect, rekindle affection, and protect your “us” from the noise of life. 💛

💭 What You’ll Learn:

• Why love can fade even in healthy marriages
• How to rebuild emotional and physical connection
• Simple habits that reignite passion and appreciation
• How to protect your marriage from routine
• Biblical principles that strengthen lasting love

🕊 Scripture References:

• Proverbs 20:5
• 1 Thessalonians 5:18
• Song of Solomon 1:2
• Genesis 2:24

❤️ Want to Go Deeper?

Check out our Marriage Bootcamp — where we share “100 Romantic Ideas” to help couples spark joy and intimacy again.
👉 Visit KenAndTabatha.com

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.
🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

💬 Share your story: Has this episode helped your marriage? Comment below or email us your testimony!
👍 Like • 💬 Comment • 🔔 Subscribe for new episodes every Thursday.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

Some wounds don’t just hurt—they rearrange your world. We open up about betrayal in its many forms—breakups, family fractures, church hurt, even the quiet feeling that God didn’t show up—and we offer a path forward that’s both honest and hopeful. Without glossing over pain, we lay out five keys for healing: tell the truth about the wound, anchor your identity in God, choose forgiveness even if trust must be rebuilt, set boundaries that protect your heart, and invite God to redeem what was lost. Along the way, we share a vivid vision of broken glass becoming a mosaic, a reminder that your story can be remade into something stronger, rarer, and more beautiful.

You’ll hear how unhealed betrayal distorts identity, sabotages new relationships through projection and defensiveness, and traps us in loops of replayed pain. We talk about people-pleasing and why you don’t need universal approval to follow God’s call, especially when the resistance comes from your inner circle. We show how to love wisely at different levels of access—crowd, twelve, and three—without guilt or bitterness. With scriptures that speak to the brokenhearted and practical tools like journaling, counseling, and short daily prayers for those who hurt us, we move from theory to action.

We close with a guided prayer for healing, words of encouragement for men and women navigating fresh heartbreak, and a gentle challenge to share what resonated most. If you’re ready to release bitterness, rebuild trust wisely, and step into a redeemed season, press play and journey with us. If this helped you, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help others find hope too.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

What if the temperature of your home could rise with one daily habit? After two rocky years at the start of our 26-year marriage, we learned that appreciation—not grand gestures—warms a cold house, heals silent nights, and makes a marriage last. We unpack how keeping a short memory, honoring each other’s roles, and practicing specific, daily gratitude turned us from scorekeepers into best friends.

Come for the story of our comeback; stay for the tools you can use tonight to strengthen intimacy, trust, and joy.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

Ever find yourself ignoring relationship red flags because your heart is saying "yes" when your gut is screaming "no"? In this revealing episode, Ken and Tabatha Claytor draw from their 26 years of marriage and ministry experience to shine a light on the seven unmistakable signs that someone isn't right for you—regardless of how strong your feelings might be.

The Claytors don't hold back as they challenge the casual dating culture with a powerful perspective: "I personally feel, especially as a Christian, we shouldn't date to date. I think we should date for marriage." This transformative approach to relationships helps singles avoid wasting emotional energy on connections that aren't heading toward a meaningful future.

Through personal stories—including Tabitha's candid admission of once staying in a relationship where she was called names and treated poorly—the couple unpacks warning signs like spiritual misalignment, disrespect, poor communication, and controlling behavior. Ken shares how he was once a "Christian atheist" who believed in God but lived as if He didn't exist, highlighting the dangers of being unequally yoked.

Perhaps most compelling is their insight on internal peace as the ultimate relationship compass. "The peace of God should be able to call something out or safe," Ken explains, encouraging listeners to trust their spiritual discernment even when others are pushing them toward a relationship. As they powerfully conclude, "The most important decision that you will ever make in your life after accepting Jesus is who you're going to marry."

Whether you're single, dating, or mentoring others in relationships, these seven principles provide a practical roadmap for finding a partner who will enhance your purpose rather than derail it. Subscribe now and join our community as we continue exploring how to build relationships that honor God and fulfill His purpose for your life.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

The assassination of Charlie Kirk has sent shockwaves through America, revealing deep divisions not just in politics, but within the church itself. In this raw, unscripted conversation, Ken and Tabatha offer a perspective you might not have considered – one that bridges understanding between drastically different viewpoints.

As Ken shares, "Everything changes when it comes to social media." Our digital algorithms create isolated bubbles of understanding where we only see content that confirms our existing beliefs. This explains why some are mourning Charlie as a fallen Christian leader while others celebrate his death as justice for perceived hatred. Rather than choosing sides, Ken and Tabatha model empathy toward both perspectives while explaining how they personally researched Kirk's statements to form their own conclusions.

The couple goes deeper than the surface-level conversation about one man's death to address the underlying spiritual issues: how we weaponize race for political purposes, the trap of victim mentality that keeps people in cycles of dependency, and the vital importance of honoring spiritual leadership even during controversial moments. Their personal stories of overcoming racism and poverty offer powerful testimony to the transformative power of the gospel.

Most importantly, they share a prophetic sense that this tragic moment has spiritual significance beyond what we can see. "I felt like my faith was attacked," Ken explains, "but I felt like there was something happening in the spirit." They describe a vision of a mantle falling on a new generation of bold believers and point to evidence of revival already breaking out in their church and beyond.

Ready to move past division and into revival? Join us for practical steps to position yourself for God's movement in this season. Share your prayer requests in the comments – we're here to support you on the journey.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

Have you ever found yourself loving your spouse but not particularly liking them in certain moments? That light switch they never flip off, those socks perpetually abandoned on the floor, or the crumbs consistently left on the counter – these small irritations can feel surprisingly monumental in marriage.

In this heartfelt and humor-filled conversation, we unpack the critical distinction between love and like in marriage. After 26 years together, we've learned that those "little foxes that spoil the vine" – the everyday annoyances – can either become relationship-destroying mountains or opportunities for growth, depending on how we respond.

We share candidly about our own friction points (bathroom door policies and house shoes rules included!) while exploring how these seemingly insignificant issues often reveal deeper relationship dynamics. The truth? Most conflicts arise when someone refuses to bend, creating power struggles that can eventually lead couples to divorce court citing "irreconcilable differences" – when really, they just never learned the art of mutual submission in small things.

Beyond just identifying the problem, we offer practical wisdom for rekindling "like" in your marriage: intentionally building a case FOR your spouse rather than against them, getting curious instead of frustrated, reconnecting with what initially attracted you to each other, and closing emotional distance through meaningful conversations. Remember – love is a choice and a commitment that transcends fluctuating feelings.

Whether you're in the butterfly-filled infatuation stage, the challenging "fight for power" phase, or working toward mature, committed love, this episode provides the tools to strengthen your relationship. Ready to transform how you view those everyday irritations? Listen now, and discover how to not just love your spouse, but genuinely like them again.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

Marriage can be beautiful, but it can also be incredibly challenging. In our case, the first two years were some of the hardest. What transformed our struggling relationship into a thriving partnership wasn't better communication or date nights—it was supernatural power.

Many believers are missing a crucial element in their spiritual lives and marriages: the baptism of the Holy Spirit. This isn't just theological jargon—it's a real, transformative experience that Jesus promised to every believer. While salvation brings the Holy Spirit to live within you, there's a second, distinct experience where He comes upon you with power. Think of it like drinking water versus being immersed in it.

For us, everything changed when we received this gift in 2001. Depression that had plagued our home for years disappeared. Priorities shifted naturally. Living a holy life became desire rather than duty. Most importantly, loving each other became easier because we weren't doing it in our own strength.

Throughout the Bible, we see this pattern clearly. John the Baptist said, "I baptize with water, but Jesus will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and fire." In Acts, new believers regularly received this power through simple faith. It wasn't reserved for special Christians—it was (and is) for everyone who asks.

The beautiful thing about this gift? You don't need to wait, tarry, or become perfect first. Jesus promised that if earthly parents know how to give good gifts, "how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask?" That's all it takes—simple, childlike asking.

Ready to experience supernatural power in your marriage and life? Listen as we share our journey and practical guidance for receiving everything God has for you. This could be the missing piece you've been searching for.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...

Send us a text

Have you ever felt like your marriage was under attack? You might be right—but the attacker isn't your spouse.

When Ken and Tabatha Claytor stood at the altar 26 years ago, they had no idea their marriage would nearly end within two years. What saved them wasn't marriage counseling or communication techniques (though those helped). It was recognizing the spiritual warfare targeting their relationship.

"Marriage is God's idea, and it's the one relationship that shows the world how much Jesus loves the church," Ken explains. "This is precisely why Satan attacks it so fiercely." From their own near-divorce experience to now helping countless couples, the Claytor's have identified six tactical weapons the enemy uses to destroy marriages: division through distraction, bitterness and unforgiveness, sexual temptation, spiritual disconnection, miscommunication, and generational patterns.

The turning point in their relationship came when they realized they weren't fighting each other—they were experiencing spiritual warfare. "It's not me against you," Tabatha emphasizes. "It's us against the devil." This perspective shift transformed their marriage from battlefield to partnership.

Through transparent sharing of their early struggles—Ken's anger and resentment, Tabitha's depression, their communication breakdown—the Claytor's offer practical wisdom for recognizing when you're fighting the wrong enemy. Their candid discussion reveals how spiritual immaturity creates vulnerability to attack and how spiritual weapons can protect your marriage covenant.

Whether you're newlyweds struggling through those challenging first years or long-married partners wondering why you keep having the same conflicts, this episode equips you with strategies to stand united against the true adversary of your marriage.

Ready to transform your relationship by fighting the right enemy? Listen now and discover how to wage spiritual warfare that strengthens rather than destroys your marriage. 

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

📍 Join us in Florida at Alive Church — with campuses in Orlando, Tampa & Gainesville.

🎟 And don’t miss Alive Conference coming soon — 3 days that can change the next 30 years of your life!

https://redeemedevents.com/event-details/1875

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

...