Don't Tell Our Wives: Warm Beer, Cheap Comedy, and News

As it turns out, everyone has disappeared this week, as it was Jethrow's last few episodes. This week it was just Honch and D.

To kick things off, Honch wishes Steve Jobs to hell because apparently he struggest with technology. But we finally made it to the real topic of flogging. A man who was making laws in Indonesia concerning sexual deviance, was caught in the act, and thus gets flogged (due to his laws). In between the discussion we take a huge left turn into Honch trying to get his kids' teacher's phone number. What ultimately happened is that the man was flogged 28 times, and he is still alive.

After discussing flogging, we go into our usual Arby's rant, which involves us talking about large amounts of meat.

Are you aware how much money strippers make? In Atlanta, strippers average about $100,000 per year and about $8,000 a night in tips. Isn't that surreal? Honch was able to elaborate on the girls driving Mercedes and Corvettes. This triggered memories in Honch's life, which included his discussion of celebrity chefs going to strip clubs.

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It only took about the first minute for Honch to get into puking up after drinking old timey alcohol after reference to the movie National Lampoon's Senior Trip.

And speaking of movies, Honch watched the latest John Wick film and decided to give us a piece of his mind. John Wick 1 (was awesome), John Wick 2 (was awesome), and apparently the movie is made for Russians? John Wick 3...12 hours of going after Russians again and something about a dog. 

After ranting about how many movie characters can attach eachother, we immediately get into creepy things to say to people while walking by. 

There is a bar called the "Open Concept", which instead of charging you every time you want a drink, they have a pay by the hour drinking deal. Could you survive it? And do Amish people drink?

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On this episode, we get a new member: Gordy. D is just going to assume every episode that he was in some movie, starting with Debbie Does Dallas and IT. The connection was that the characters name was Georgie, but Gordy is close enough. Fully man.

If you didn't catch this from every other episode, the Honch has to travel, and subsequently has to deal with a lot of people dressed terribly, including dressing like a prostitute, pajama jeans, and 'boogs'. Honch believes that airports should have a dresscode, and not to dress up, but to actually dress down..and Halloween themed days.

Jethrow searched the archives of Reddit for the best questions, specifically "vibing gamer". What is the loophole you have ever found? Honch thought it was about video games, but it's not. Jethrow found out that attendance wasn't taken until 15 minutes in, so then Jethrow would leave class afterwards. Honch had problems overpaying his traffic violations.

There is a restaurant in Minnesota that has a burger it claims, will induce labor. What ingredients are required for that to happen? How about Carolina Reapers?

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So once we got into the news, a very, very, very dedicated fan went to Miley Cyrus concert in Las Vegas, NV and he wasn't supposed to be there. He was so obsessed, that he wanted to impregnate Miley and posted it everywhere including Facebook and Instagram. Security and everyone else was on alert just incase the man showed up to the concert, and they eventually got him at T-mobile arena close to the Luxor Hotel. Honch doesn't want to 'knock her up', he wants to have a relationship with Jethrow.

So Jethrow also brought us a question from the Internet, which was "How do you cook your Ramen, what do you add to it?" The Honch adds egg, and apparently the Jethrow adds hot dogs. Did you also know that people are ashamed with they buy Ramen at the store? They put it at the bottom of the cart.

Did you hear about the plane that made an emergency landing after coffee was spilled on the plane's cockpit controls. The plan, bound for Cancun, Mexico had to divert, as smoke came into the cab. With over 300 people on board, this could have brewed something worse. Was this the awful on-plane coffee, or did someone bring on their latte. At the end of the day everyone was ok, there was no injuries, and they will be using cup lids to keep PLANES FROM CRASHING INTO THE OCEAN! 

There was a woman who decided that impersonating a police officer was a good thing. With carrying a gun and badge, the woman in Georgia decided that she wanted some snacks...and well, expected some snacks because was, as she thought, "the law". She was pulled over my the real police (not her parole officer) and she is in trouble. If we can make one recommendation, don't impersonate a police officer for snacks. What snack would you impersonate an officer for? Cream pies, nutty bars, cool ranch munchies, and strawberry swiss cake rolls? D discussed a time where a snack almost cost him his life in his car. 

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A group of people flock to the city of Rachel (a ways outside of Las Vegas) to take on Area 51. What began as a Facebook event to storm the military base, turned into a smaller following on-site. People quickly realized that law enforcement would hold them accountable, and it was mostly peaceful. Only one person was arrested and was let go moments later. 

Jethrow then tells us about his next big business idea, which involves creating a TV game show where they setup a sting operation with cash on the dash of a car. The thief takes the money and then they are caught, but does anyone even win this game? 

After talking about Jethrow's game show, Honch wanted to talk about Bridget The Midget, who is a tiny porn start that recently stabbed her boyfriend who was cheating on her. We get into the whole 'PC' around the phrase, but there is a complete audio track of this happening. 

Bubba gets us up to speed on some illegal smuggling going on. As it turns out, in Australia, there is a 'syndicate' that was bringing in Danish Hog Seamen. We would hate to be the investegators

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A place in United Kingdom is trying to deter people from using their public restrooms as places for sexual activities. The units can sense people using them in ways unintended, which results in getting sprayed, being blasted with loud noises, and the doors will open...so it's not a good place to have a date.

The Jethrow then finds a question from Reddit; how do you basically stop someone that is talking...politely. The Honch thinks that going to the bathroom is the answer. Or pretending that your wallet is a flip phone. 

In other news, a meth dealer who had $140 million dollars in Meth, crashed into a cop car...in front of a police station. 

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We start off this episode with the story of a religious school opening in what used to be a strip club in a strip mall. If you've ever been to one, there is probably some major renovations needed, including glitter removal. I guess there's a reason for you to go to Wisconcin (if not for the cheese curds.) We wonder if the school uniforms might be a little questionable.

We turned to reddit to figure out what is our worst first world problems. As it turns out, Honch eats a lot and over stuffs his body. Jethrow doesn't know which of his 3 cars to get rid of, and the D cannot get his USB charger to work for his iPhone. Bubba has issues with the Taco Bell app. Also...Honch resurfaces the pain of his wife ordering Starbucks.

So PornHub is actually doing something pretty crazy, but it sort of makes sense. In what they call the 'dirtiest porn ever', it starts people in very polluted areas to bring awareness to the issue of trash. Every time this clip is watched, money is donated to cleaning up beaches. 

In other news..a person in Florida got in a bit of trouble by making a pill in the same of President Donald Trump. The drug (Ecstacy) was in the shape of his head (and organge in color). The man was pulled over....and of course, the drugs were taken. Looks like he'll be spending some time in prison. 

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To kick off this episode of Delay Radio, we sort of quickly jump into the news. A man has tried to escape prison by dressing up as his daughter, and well, forgetting to talk like his daughter's voice. The Honch elightened us to question where the daughter was...when he was trying to escape as her. 

Jethrow then tells us about a time when a telemarketer called him about helping his business. Jethrow keeps the man on the phone for 45 minutes, just to mess with him. Have you ever messed with one?

We continue this jail/prison theme that wasn't intentional. Did you know that it was illegal to masturbate in jail? As it turns out, a man in Florida that is already in jail...is being charged again. He better have soft sheets, he's going to be in for awhile.

We end with Honch ending his marriage via. podcast episode. Why you say? Because apparently stupid decisions. You're in for it Honch (if you're reading this).

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We start this episode with a horrible intro per usual, and then once we settle down, we get into the news. 

A southern man was in a Walmart, where he was caught stealing BBQ brisket (sliced of course), and a propane tank in his pants. The cops didn't have a hard time finding the items, but the man was so angry in the cruiser that he tried to bust his way out. He was charged with assault...(not salt, which you would want to put in a brisket before smoking.)

Also, some of us didn't know it, but Jethrow was in jail at some point in his life. He then tells us about a man who was intoxicated that busted the window on a cruiser, and then catches pepper spray and spits it back at the cop. What kind of people is Jethrow talking to? Jethrow decided to befriend him so he didn't get in trouble.

After talking about his jailtime, Jethrow searched the Internet for the finest of questions. A man has grown bored of his job, and wanted a creative way to quit his job. If Honch wanted to leave his mark, he would take a huge dump in filing cabinets. We're starting to see a pattern with Honch. Bubba's method of leaving is a little more passive aggressive...by sending an email and making an epic exit. We'll leave it to all of you to leave your job. Needless to say, you really shouldn't do any of these things...we're just kidding.

A man in Florida man had enough of his neighbor playing loud bass music, so he went upstairs, grabbed roach spray...and shot it in the faces of people, and then proceedes to hit himself nunchucks. He's been watching karate kid too many times...but the Honch prefers to watch the West Virginia Ninja. 

We end with a man in Belgium who decided to try to create a record for sitting on the toilet. Would you ever try to break a record for sitting on a toilet? 

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We start this episode with a bunch of people getting whiped out in China. As it turns out, there is a massive waterpark with a wave pool that malfunctioned. People thought that a drunk guy had did it, but it turned out to be an electrical issue. But the wave was high...and it was fast.

Also this week, Jethrow is running for president of the united states. But before that, he was laying in bed and talking to his wife. He quickly ended up discussing all of the bad things he would do as President, so every 4 years he's going to knock 50 days of the calendar. And it does get worse, we promise. If Honch became president, he would put a BBQ stand on every corner and force everyone to speak in a southern accent.

If you've ever been to Woodland,NC you would know that they would be a solar leader in the area (at least we think). So the people in the area have had some general concerns about solar energy. A retired science teacher talks about all this 'sciency' stuff, and thinks that the solar farms are causing cancer, causing people to leave, and it is going to cause a mass extinction of resources. Apparently they can suck all of the energy from the sun. 

Bubba then gets into what really gets him going. He really hates the overuse of the 'engineer' in some job titles. Making some jobs sound better than they are, but Bubba is actually an engineer. 

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