The theme of this week: nobody moved. We finally get a death we’ve been waiting for, but we can barely appreciate it because we’re so tired of the character. And speaking of tired, one of our main conflicts this week is a tired fight club trope - oh brother. Elsewhere, Bonnie, Nora, and Mary louise search for Rayna Cruz (the huntress we’ve been hearing so much about) but find a seemingly sweet old lady. Also there: Enzo, now working for a mysterious organization. Also, Caroline’s babies are siphons hungry for vampire magic, causing a teeny weeny desiccation problem. Finally, Matt tells Penny about vampires - I guess he needs a girlfriend too. 

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Stefan and Damon are both out of the Phoenix/hell stone so time to reintegrate into society. Society, unfortunately, includes Julian leading a biker gang in Mystic Falls and a whole bunch of hallucinations. Stefan is watching over Damon, even though his struggles have not ended, and Damon is just at the start of a bad day. Meanwhile, Caroline and Alaric have a baby shower with Bonnie, Tyler, and Matt, ending with Matt getting pulled over by a potential love interest, and Tyler getting roped into Damon drama. Alaric makes plans to get away from vampires, Stefan gets terrorized by Julian and that old safe, and even Elena can’t escape Damon’s self destructive streak.

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This minisode breaks down our long-awaited trip to the motherland: Mystic Falls, VA aka Covington, GA. We share our favorite parts of the experience, what we saw, and, most importantly, the souvenirs we bought!

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This week we get a close look at Damons personal hell, and dare we say the Phoenix Stone really went off! This personal hell has everything: a Groundhog Day-esque structure, the Civil War, fake escapes, the first time Damon killed someone, and of course, MOMMY ISSUES! Though we end the episode with him (seemingly) escaping, the bloodshed carries over from hell into the real world, and we get a pretty terrifying cliffhanger.

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It’s Nora and Mary Louise’s anniversary! But not a big one, just 133. But big enough for Mary Louise to pop the question! To celebrate, Julian throws a logistically confusing party, while Lily, Valerie, Stefan, and Damon hatch a plan to kill Julian. It basically involves Valerie telling the truth and hoping the heretics believe her. Caroline picks the worst possible day to tell Stefan about her newfound babies, and he has one of the worst possible reactions. Elsewhere, Enzo has a day of highs and lows: he finally gets to kiss Lily (EW), but he also gets put back in a cage (by MATT).

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We get a couple mommies this week but only one can be the dearest!Stefan and Damon try a new strategy in their plan to kill Julian, recruiting Lily. Seems like a bad plan at first, but turns out torture is effective. Meanwhile, Enzo tries his own plan to kill Julian, which is mostly just some juvenile silliness which also does not work. Finally, Caroline continues to be in denial that she has Ric’s babies inside her (us too girl!) but turns out that Gemini love for invisique starts young!

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This week, our main event is basically if you ordered the Mikaelson ball off Shein, as Lily hosts a peace mixer for Julian, the characters we know, and a bunch of essentially hired extras. Stefan thinks it’s the perfect opportunity to kill Julian (to avenge his child that never was, Jacob), and Damon thinks they should wait a bit - and neither wants to compromise. Meanwhile, it’s highs and lows for Alaric as Fake Jo takes a turn for the worse, but his babies appear to be alive - in Caroline's womb! Lastly, the time jump has officially STOPPED being fun now that we know it involves an Alaric/Caroline engagement.

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This episode starts with the best news we've had in weeks: Bonenzo confirmation! Unfortunately we get plenty of bullshit as Stefan and Damon spend the day with Valerie, and Stefan is decidedly NOT giving. Alaric watches over Jo while Bonnie aims to get some information from Oscar, but both of them soon learn they should not have trusted the Phoenix Stone. Lily finally hears from Valerie that Julian is evil, but why listen to reason when you can bring your boyfriend back from the dead? Finally, with a new reveal of just how rude Lily is, Damon decides her time for happiness is over and even Bonnie agrees.

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