Seline has officially kidnapped Josie and Lizzie, and reveals her plan for them: she wants to offer them to Cade as replacements for her and Sybil! Ric and Caroline team up to find Seline and their kids, but it’s not without drama. Caroline breaks off her engagement, and Ric is a dick to pretty much everyone but especially Caroline. Stefan is told not to help, but still does, even joining with Damon to make Cade an extreme offer. Enzo is tortured by Sybil a la Dr. Whitmore, but luckily Bonnie is there to comfort him. Finally, Sybil betrays Seline for no real apparent reason. 

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When news of Tyler reaches the group in Mystic Falls, everyone decides to come together to mourn. Alaric is free for the day as Dorian returns to the Armory and Seline kindly watches the kids with no ulterior motives! Matt, Caroline, Stefan, and Ric go to the cemetery to mourn, but of course Damon is there to... make empty threats? Bonnie is busy trying to get Enzo's humanity back on, and she takes drastic measures. Finally, we end with happy moment for once, until Matt makes himself useful and blows up Seline's spot, but looks like it may be too late...

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In our latest minisode we are assigning every character their Taylor Swift era! Some are layups while others bring up quite a conversation. Swifties and non-Swifites alike will love this one!

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Sybil finally gives us some backstory on how she became a siren, including - GASP - the reveal of a sister who we also happen to know. She draws parallels to the Salvatore brothers, and lays it on a little thick. Through this backstory, we are introduced to Cade, a psychic who is, for all intents and purposes, the Devil. We also meet Peter Maxwell - because we ran out of parents to kill, I guess. Finally. The mysterious wind returns to snatch up a character who we’re pretty sure is destined for hell. 

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Enzo and Damon remain under Sybil's control, but when the Bonnie secret comes out Sybil of course is jealous. Bonnie attempts to celebrate the Steroline engagement with Caroline, but of course fun and happiness never lasts long. With Sybil attempting psychological warfare on our girls and Damon dragging Stefan into a mystery issue with Enzo, we find ourselves in a mess including a another car crash, attempted murder, and a choice between Damon and Enzo. Luckily, Rice and Georgie are hard at work researching the mysterious artifact, which turns out to be powerful against Sybil. Finally, Tyler returns, yay! Oh wait...

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This week, we finally get to know Sybil and she is sort of slaying. In the process, we learn more about sirens and their “psychic powers”. To throw Sybil off any scent (and alert the team of their movements), Enzo offers up a victim to draw everyone together: the one and only Sarah Salvatore. Bonnie goes rogue (which is fair!!) and attempts to break Enzo from Sybil’s, control despite his protests. The only good news is that Steroline girlies, we are eating tonight! 

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It’s our last season premiere, made all the more sweeter by making it out of season 7! Damon and Enzo however are not feeling the sweetness as they continue to kill people for the mysterious evil entity, but hey at least they are only killing evil people! Stefan, Caroline, and Bonnie track missing persons and finally come upon a lead. Caroline deals with a threat to her nanny and custody with Ric, while Stefan and Bonnie head to a crime scene littered with clues left behind by Enzo. Meanwhile, Alaric has taken over the Armory with a team of interns, busy researching just how Damon and Enzo escaped that cave. We get clues all episode and finally a reveal of the evil entity, tying in greek mythology, hell, and the long awaited Nathalie Kelley!

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Spoiler Note: For anyone unspoiled, we discuss the end of the show from 1:18:50-1:21:01 - tread lightly!

We did it, everyone - we made it to the end of season 7! As a reward, we get this pretty great finale. Bonnie continues to hunt everyone as they scramble to get into the Armory. With the help of Enzi making himself a target and some adorable little witch siphons, our team can get into the Armory to destroy the final Everlasting and (hopefully) avoid the mysterious evil entity. And yet, no one seems that urgent or concerned about the evil entity … huh. Stefan and Caroline finally work things out (and kick Ric to the curb). But it’s not all happy! Damon makes the selfless decision to go into the vault and stays there after mysteriously hearing Elena’s voice. Enzo follows, taking them on a new adventure, killing a lot of people for mysterious reasons. 

We also debrief about a season we haven’t been particular fans of, and pitch how we would have fixed it. We also look ahead to season 8. 

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With Bonnie asleep as everyone waits to see how Rayna’s curse will affect her when she wakes, everyone teams up to make sure she does not wake up and immediately kill them. After a couple attempts to connect with her humanity fall flat, Damon does what he does best and inspires both anger and annoyance. But when it turns out the huntress marks can now come via dreams (ok…) Caroline gets to experience what Stefan did when he messed up, Stefan makes a very Damon move, and Enzo’s guitar finally betrays him. Finally Enzo, who has been pulling his weight and then some lately, gets an assist from Matt and provides a plan to save Bonnie and all our vampire friends.

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Our team - split into three duos - is trying to kill everyone on Rayna’s list, but the number is nonsensically large. Bonnie meanwhile shortens the time limit by injecting more of Rayna’s blood to stay protected from The Armory, make Enzo rush home to be with her. Damon makes the only smart call and enlists backup, despite the fact that it will make people angry. Matt explains his vendetta against Stefan, and Stefan reveals the truth - which is not a fun memory for Matt! Caroline and Alaric are kidnapped and discuss their relationship - if you can even call it that. After some wheeling and dealing, the vault is opened, and Alex is reunited with Yvette. Bonnie keeps the vault contained, but of course we discuss what is in there and if/when we will meet it. 

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