Dying To Ask

Are you thriving or surviving? Most of us are the latter these days as we near the one-year anniversary of the term "social distance."

Maybe we all need to schedule more fun into our calendars?

Really, schedule the fun. Plan your happy.

That's been Carmen Micsa's secret for 20 years. Carmen is a successful real estate agent, mom of two and burgeoning rapper.

She starts each week by scheduling fun things first and then everything else. It's like having dessert before dinner.

And, you know what? Carmen is having one of her best years yet personally and professionally, despite the pandemic.

On this Dying to Ask:

The skills Carmen learned growing up in a Communist country that made living through the pandemic easier

Why Carmen started scheduling fun first and the instant impact it had on her mental health

Tips to rearrange your calendar for optimal energy and better weeks

How a middle-aged mom became a rap star

How do influencers make money? I scroll Instagram and am borderline obsessed with knowing how girls posing with purses are paying their bills.

Spoiler alert. Most aren't paying the bills.

In this episode, we're getting a rare behind-the-scenes look at the world of influencers with @nycfitfam, aka Jamie Hess.

Jamie worked for nearly two decades in the fast-paced world of public relations in New York City. She especially loved working with health and fitness clients. She started the @nycfitfam page on Instagram to document her fit lifestyle with her husband.

@nycfitfam became a thing. A big thing. Soon, health and fitness brands were approaching Jamie to try their products and post links to their companies.

Jamie left public relations to turn her side hustle into a full hustle. Two years later, she's carved out a lucrative career in front of the camera on social media and on TV, as a QVC fitness expert.

Jamie credits two things for her success as an influencer.

First, she understands what brands need, thanks to her years in PR. And second, her mom is Joan Lunden. Yes, that Joan Lunden. Jamie says her mother's influence breaking ground in television news on "Good Morning America" laid the foundation for her work ethic.

On this Dying to Ask:

How Jamie turned a side hustle into a full-time gig

Her warning for anyone thinking about trading a traditional job for a life on Instagram

How she turned her home into a TV studio to continue on-camera work for QVC

What it was like growing up on TV during Joan Lunden's 20 years on "GMA"

Why Jamie and her husband left NYC in the middle of the pandemic and never went back

The two words Jamie says at the end of every day to stay on track personally and professionally

The countdown clock to the Olympic do-over is going. In six months, Tokyo will host the delayed 2020 Summer Olympics. It's the first time an Olympics has been rescheduled and it's created worries, frustrations and challenges for athletes, fans and media.

In this episode, Fitz catches up with two-time Olympian and gold medalist Maggie Steffens. Maggie is the captain of the women's water polo team.

On this Dying to Ask:

How Team USA is training during a pandemic

How Olympians shifted their mindset to fine tune their mental edge

And why Maggie and Fitz say the Tokyo Olympics could be the best Olympics ever

"Right now is a lot."

That one sentence sums up life for all of us these days. Dr. Christine Koh, a brain scientist turned lifestyle expert turned influencer, tweeted that gem recently.

It was so good and so dead-on that I reached out immediately to pick her brain about how to calm the overwhelming feelings so many of us are dealing with in 2021.

Christine's take on life in the time of COVID-19 is equal parts helpful and humorous. Her scientific background explains the why behind our overwhelm. Her uncanny knack to connect with people, especially women, provides the how in dealing with all that life is throwing at us these days.

On this Dying to Ask:

The tweet that took me down a Christine Koh rabbit hole

How a Harvard-trained scientist became a lifestyle expert, influencer and podcast host

And the three things you can do immediately to slow the brain drain

It's my first solo episode of the season. And, in this show, I'm talking about a phone call I got from a friend that changed my outlook on everything.

COVID fatigue is legit. A University of Colorado study found 4 in 10 Americans are stressed and/or anxious. Only 4 in 10? This past year has been, well, a lot. In a lot of ways. In ALL the ways.

Living with constant low-level anxiety is the new norm for people trying to work, home-school, not catch COVID-19, etc. And even the most resilient people hit the wall. I did. And, I had no idea it was happening until a close friend called and said, "I'm doing a welfare check."

It was a game-changer and a major reality check.

On this Dying to Ask:

What I did that prompted my friend's phone call.

I outline the "phone a friend" challenge and explain why we need to regularly check in on friends and family.

And the three things that constitute "self-care" in my world these days.

Here's the previous podcast referenced in this week's episode.

Words matter. Now more than ever.

Use a word out of context or a word that is no longer politically correct and you can hurt someone or, in extreme cases, lose your job.

Silicon Valley entrepreneur May Habib is the CEO of Writer. Writer is AI software designed to take the words out of your mouth. Writer's artificial intelligence highlights questionable language and offers more acceptable phrasing. It basically saves you from yourself. And, it protects companies in a cancel culture.

What kinds of words?

Elderly, addict and master bedroom are all controversial words. What's wrong with them and what should you say instead?

On this Dying to Ask:

How May started Writer

How artificial intelligence catches controversial words and phrases and why companies are relying on this kind of protection more and more

Why you should be open to updating the words you use

And May and Fitz bond over the ridiculous fun they had working on college newspapers

If you don't laugh, you'll cry. How many times have you said that in 2020?

Comedian Kerri Pomarolli is known as "Hollywood's favorite good girl." She's a devout Christian and known as a clean comedian. Translation: She doesn't swear in her act and you can play her stuff with your kids in the room.

Kerri earns a living acting, doing standup and giving motivational keynote addresses for Fortune 500 companies.

That all came to an immediate halt in March with the pandemic.

On this Dying to Ask:

Why a sense of humor is as important as a mask in dealing with the pandemic

How Kerri has pivoted a career in comedy while working in her living room

And how she got a gig writing Hallmark movies

Grit: defined as courage and resolve.

That definition should have a picture of Nancy Grace next to it. She is a legal commentator, former prosecutor and TV icon.

She was the biggest name on HLN for 12 years. Some 4.5 million people watched her coverage of the Casey Anthony trial in 2011. And, she's been parodied on "Saturday Night Live." You know you've made it when that happens.

Her interest in the law and obsession with justice started after her fiance Keith was murdered. Since that time, she's dedicated her life to being a voice for crime victims and their families.

Her latest TV venture is "Bloodline Detectives." It shows how modern forensic technology is cracking cold cases.

Nancy's latest book is "Don't Be a Victim: Fighting Back Against America's Crime Wave."

And, like the rest of us, she's spending most of the year in quarantine dealing with kids, nonstop cooking and laundry that never ends.

Through it all, she's managed to grow her grit and maintain her trademark energy and passion.

Guest host Teo Torres and I were dying to ask: "How do you grow grit in a year like 2020?"

How's your creativity these days? A lot of us are finding it tough to focus and tap into the creative parts of our brain.

2020 is a creativity killer for a lot of us. But, it doesn't have to be that way.

Author KJ Dell'Antonia is having one of her best years yet as a writer despite the pandemic.

KJ is a host of the popular writing podcast, #AmWriting, and is the former editor of The New York Times' Motherlode blog. Her parenting book "How to be a Happier Parent" is a staple for new parents.

Her fiction debut, "The Chicken Sisters," landed in bookstores this week. And Reese Witherspoon just named it her December book club pick. Witherspoon's literary blessing is like gold in the book world.

How does KJ spark her own creativity each day? She sets a timer. Yes, a timer.

On this Dying to Ask:

How to use KJ's timer method to spark your own creativity for a big project

Learn other techniques to eliminate distraction and give your brain the freedom to create

And what it's like to try to get a book noticed in the world when you can't travel and do book signings

How's your motivation these days?

What if I told you there are four words that can make an instant difference in how you see your personal and professional challenges?

They're four words Olympian Kendall Wesenberg uses in training and competing as a skeleton athlete. And she was relying on the technique when she joined us while quarantining at the Olympic Training Center in Lake Placid, New York.

But you don't have to be an Olympic athlete to use this mental hack.

On this Dying to Ask:

How Kendall figured out her "what's next" during a pandemic

How the four words, "control what you can," can instantly change your outlook and lower your stress

What it's like quarantining at the Olympic Training Center

And how Kendall made the decision to come out as a bisexual athlete