Dr. Sandie Morgan and Kathy McGibbon Givens discuss how to get “unstuck” in survivor aftercare. They consider the language we use, aftercare programs, and holistic approaches when serving survivors on their journey to become unstuck.
Kathy McGibbon Givens is a wife, mother, author, and playwright who has overcome the dark world of sex-trafficking. Kathy’s goal is to raise awareness, fight for those who are being trafficked, and mentor those who have overcome it. She is now Co-Founder and Executive Director of Twelve 11 Partners and in 2021, she was appointed to be a member of the U.S. Advisory Council on Human Trafficking.
You’re listening to the Ending Human Trafficking podcast. This is episode number 252, What It Takes to Get Unstuck with Kathy McGibbon Givens.
Produced by Innovate Learning, maximizing human potential.
Welcome to the Ending Human Trafficking podcast. My name is Dave Stachowiak.
And my name is Sandie Morgan.
And this is the show where we empower you to study the issues, be a voice, and make a difference in ending human trafficking. Sandie, we are always working together with partners and we of course are helping all of us in this work to get unstuck. Today’s guest is going to really help us to do that. I am so glad to welcome Kathy McGibbon Givens to the show. She is a wife, mother, author, and playwright who has overcome the dark world of sex trafficking. Kathy’s goal is to raise awareness, fight for those who are being trafficked, and mentor those who have overcome it. She is now Co-Founder and Executive Director of Twelve 11 Partners. And in 2021, she was appointed to be a member of the U.S. Advisory Council on Human Trafficking by presidential appointment. Kathy, we’re so glad to welcome you to Ending Human Trafficking.
Kathy McGibbon Givens 1:34
I’m so glad to be here. Thank you so much for having me.
Kathy, we haven’t got to be in the same room yet, but you were a speaker at Ensure Justice just a few months ago here at Vanguard. And there were rave reviews. Everyone felt so empowered by your workshop and your panel presentation during the plenary. So, thank you so much.
Kathy McGibbon Givens 2:01
That was a wonderful time. I thank you for having me. I keep thinking about that event. And that is definitely one of the highlights. Thank you so much for that platform.
Well, and my husband attended your workshop. He’s a faithful attendee at Ensure Justice. And he’s a pastor. So he’s been hearing about how churches should respond for many years. And he loved hearing you use the term overcomer as opposed to victim or survivor. Can you tell us why that’s important and what it takes to be an overcomer?
Kathy McGibbon Givens 2:39
Absolutely. So, in my own journey of restoration, when I first came out of the life, and when I first understood what trafficking was, I still felt, I still took on a lot of that blame, I still felt like a victim. So it was very hard for me to even say that I was a survivor because I still felt that shame associated with that lifestyle. And so, the more I started sharing, and my healing journey continued, I said, ‘Okay, well, I’m a survivor,’ like I think that some of that stuff is in the past and I think that I’m growing. I was growing in my professional career; I was growing emotionally and spiritually. And, I thought that I had arrived, I’ve survived that thing, I beat it. Well, I was doing a presentation one year and I remember this moment so specifically. I kept saying, ‘I must have as a survivor of trafficking, and as a survivor of sexual exploitation’– I use that term throughout this whole presentation. And this gentleman came up to me and he said, ‘You know what, I loved everything about your presentation. But, you’re so resilient that I cannot associate you with your past, because I see you now.’ And he said the only reminder that I had was the fact that you kept using that term survivor. And once you said that, I was like, ‘Oh, yeah, that’s right. She, she did overcome trafficking.’ And so he went into this spiel, and he gave me this long, beautiful story about his wife overcoming cancer and we were both in tears. And I realized, it made me pause and realize, wow, I really overcame certain things in my life. I really overcame trafficking. And so for me, that term means that I defeated it. It’s a term that is associated with thriving. So, I’m thriving spiritually, emotionally, mentally. When victims come out of the life and then they survive the life, and then they start growing in their healing journey, I believe that we have overcome. I believe that we have all overcome the things that tried to defeat us. And so, that’s why that term–I’m really passionate about that term if you can’t tell. But, I’m really advocating that that term be used especially for individuals that have overcome trafficking and sexual exploitation.
I loved it. And when I read on your website, under the part–just so people can find it–you have a word from the founder. And what you really did for me is you’ve framed the complexity of what it means to become an overcomer. We sometimes have, I don’t know, an instant idea of going from victim to survivor when someone comes out of human trafficking, and especially out of sex trafficking. But, you set this stage for building normalcy into your life. Nothing was normal. You were embedded in a life of trauma that affected every aspect of your life. So, you actually included a term, break the cycle of toxicity, and you talk about a trauma cycle. Can you explain what that means for us to better understand?
Kathy McGibbon Givens 6:03
Absolutely. And as you stated, once someone has come out of the life of trafficking, a victim, I think what people need to understand and what people need to hear is that the psychological chains are so much stronger than the physical chains, than the physical captivity. So, just because I escaped, just because an individual escaped their perpetrator or their trafficker, doesn’t mean that they’re free at that moment. There are certain things that you have to work it and re-learn. So for me, particularly, I had to re-learn how to engage in society again. I had to learn how to be an upright citizen again. It didn’t all come naturally, because everything was stripped away from me. My voice was taken from me. My identity was almost taken from me. So, everything was kind of wrapped up in that, that lifestyle. So, when I came out and was reintegrated, there are things that I had to do step-by-step to make sure that my healing journey progressed. Things like looking people in the eye. I had to learn that, that didn’t come naturally to me. Getting a job. It was so hard for me to get a job because I had the skills, but I couldn’t break again that ment...
