This week, Mike and Kaz take a perilous scroll through the digital back alley of horology: AliExpress.

What begins as innocent curiosity quickly devolves into uncovering horrors like a G-Shock knockoff that might secretly be a spy device, a faceted-case “dress watch” branded with a name so dark and questionable it probably requires a visit from law enforcement, and even a shameless clone of one of the Snobs’ favorite microbrand models. It’s equal parts comedy, tragedy, and public service announcement as the guys ask the eternal question: just because you can buy it for $3.99 with free shipping… should you?