Living While Loving Your Child Through Addiction

EP105 Manipulation or Desperation? How to Tell the Difference & Respond Effectively


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Heather explores the complex topic of manipulation in the context of addiction and family dynamics.

When your child is using substances, it’s common to experience behaviors that feel manipulative or self-serving. However, Heather emphasizes the importance of stepping back to see these actions through a compassionate lens, which can empower parents to respond with clarity rather than react out of frustration or hurt.

Heather covers:

  • Understanding Manipulation:
  • What manipulation is and isn’t, and how labeling behaviors as manipulative can reduce loved ones to harmful stereotypes.
  • Influence vs. Desperation: How
  • to distinguish when behaviors stem from true manipulation versus desperation or an attempt to meet a basic need.
  • A Compassionate Perspective:
  • Shifting from a “victim-perpetrator” mindset to a more empowered approach, recognizing manipulation as a universal human behavior rather than one solely tied to addiction.
  • Strategies for Intentional
  • Responses: Tips for responding thoughtfully, using the CRAFT approach (Community Reinforcement and Family Training).

    With insights drawn from her own experiences, Heather shares the importance of language, self-awareness, and finding less charged ways to label challenging behaviors. This episode is a must-listen for anyone looking to navigate difficult behaviors with compassion and maintain peace of mind in the face of addiction.

    Resources From Heather Ross Coaching

    In Person WeWomen Retreat Information https://wewomenretreat.com/registration/

    Guide about enabling -

    If you've ever worried about enabling, this guide is for you!
    https://heatherrosscoaching.com/perspective-about-enabling/

    If you want answers and support to help you and your child Sign up for a 45-minute $17 Road to Recovery call

    with me using the link below https://heatherrosscoachingcalendar.as.me/RoadtoRecovery⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

    GROUP COACHING PROGRAM - Join the waitlist - Be the first to get details.

    https://heatherrosscoaching.com/peace-of-mind-community/

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    Living While Loving Your Child Through AddictionBy Heather Ross

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