Ex-it Strategy

Summary: In this episode, Elizabeth Stephenson, Sarah Hink, and Jen Bordeaux from New Direction Family Law share the top ten essential tips and advice for navigating through a divorce. They cover both legal and personal aspects, offering practical insights and supportive guidance to help listeners manage this challenging period in their lives. From financial independence to emotional support, these tips aim to provide a comprehensive understanding of what to expect and how to handle various situations during a divorce.

Key Points:

1. Your Kids Will Be Okay
   • Emphasize the importance of shielding children from conflict.
   • Tips on co-parenting and maintaining a healthy relationship with your children.
2. Love Your Kids More Than You Hate Your Ex
   • Avoid speaking negatively about your ex in front of your children.
   • Focus on your children's well-being rather than on past grievances.
3. There's Always a Way to Make It Work Financially
   • Discuss strategies for financial independence.
   • Importance of understanding your financial situation and planning accordingly.
4. Don't Use Your Attorney for Emotional Support
   • Seek professional counseling for emotional needs.
   • Focus on using your attorney for legal advice and strategy.
5. Things Might Get Worse Before They Get Better
   • Prepare for potential escalation of conflict during the process.
   • Stay focused on long-term outcomes and personal growth.
6. Focus on Yourself and Set Boundaries
   • Prioritize self-care and establish clear boundaries with your ex.
   • Use tools like Our Family Wizard for communication.
7. Unfriend or Block Your Ex on Social Media
   • Avoid the temptation to stalk or engage with your ex online.
   • Protect your mental health by limiting exposure to potentially upsetting content.
8. Treat Communications as Though They Will Be Read in Court
   • Always maintain a respectful and factual tone in written communications.
   • Understand that any communication could be used as evidence.
9. Surround Yourself with Supportive People
   • Lean on friends, family, or support groups for emotional support.
   • Avoid people who encourage negative or aggressive behavior.
10. Don't Rush into Dating After Divorce
    • Take time to heal and reflect on your past relationship.
    • Ensure you are emotionally ready before starting a new relationship.

Resources Mentioned:

• Our Family Wizard and other co-parenting tools.
• Professional counselors and therapists.
• Support groups and online communities for divorced individuals.

Call to Action:

• Follow New Direction Family Law on TikTok for more tips and insights.
• Reach out to a professional counselor for emotional support.
• Consult with an attorney to understand your legal rights and options.

Conclusion: Divorce can be a challenging and emotional journey, but by following these ten tips, you can navigate it more effectively. Focus on your well-being, seek appropriate support, and take one step at a time to ensure a better future for yourself and your children.

Summary: In this insightful episode, Elizabeth Stephenson, Sarah Hink, and Jen Bordeaux from New Direction Family Law discuss essential tips and advice for anyone preparing to go to court. Drawing from their extensive experience, they provide practical do’s and don’ts to help listeners present themselves effectively and navigate the courtroom with confidence. The episode covers everything from appropriate attire and punctuality to emotional control and the importance of honesty.

Key Points:

1. Introduction and Overview (00:00:00)
   • Hosts introduce themselves and the topic of the episode.
   • Elizabeth and Sarah share their extensive courtroom experiences.
2. Courtroom Etiquette: Do's and Don'ts (00:01:18)
   • Importance of dressing appropriately for court.
   • Avoiding casual attire such as running shorts, flip-flops, and tank tops.
3. Respect and Behavior in Court (00:02:12)
   • Respecting the judge and courtroom officials.
   • Do not interrupt the judge or make inappropriate gestures.
4. Punctuality is Key (00:06:00)
   • Always arrive on time for court hearings.
   • Plan your route and parking in advance to ensure timely arrival.
5. Emotional Control (00:05:19)
   • Importance of maintaining composure and controlling emotions in court.
   • Avoid eye-rolling, sighing, and other negative expressions.
6. Preparation and Honesty (00:12:12)
   • Being prepared with all necessary documents well in advance.
   • Always be honest with your attorney and in court to avoid damaging your case.
7. Courtroom Procedures and Expectations (00:14:53)
   • Understanding the flow of a court case and what to expect.
   • The significance of hearing prep meetings and following your attorney’s guidance.
8. Children in Court (00:10:41)
   • Avoid bringing children to court unless absolutely necessary.
   • Impact of childcare challenges for low-income families attending court.
9. Community and Judicial Support (00:16:14)
   • Appreciation for the judicial community and legal professionals.
   • The importance of respecting the legal process and the roles of everyone involved.
10. Conclusion and Final Thoughts (00:17:08)
    • Encouragement to follow the discussed tips for a smoother court experience.
    • Mention of New Direction Family Law's TikTok account for more insights.

Resources Mentioned:

• New Direction Family Law TikTok account for additional tips and insights.

Call to Action:

• Follow New Direction Family Law on TikTok for more helpful content.
• Reach out to your attorney with any questions or for further guidance on preparing for court.

Summary: In this special Pride Month episode, Elizabeth Stephenson, Sarah Hink, and Jen Bordeaux discuss the intricacies of family law as it pertains to same-sex relationships. The episode delves into the legal challenges and considerations for LGBTQ+ couples, particularly in North Carolina. Topics include custody issues, child support, surrogacy, adoption, and the recent Court of Appeals case affecting same-sex couples. The hosts emphasize the importance of legal guidance and community support for LGBTQ+ families.

00:00 Introduction and Greetings

00:49 Busy Times in Family Law

01:16 Pride Month and Family Law

01:56 Legal Nuances of Same-Sex Marriage

03:22 Common Law Marriage Explained

04:34 Recent Court Case on Same-Sex Custody

11:55 Surrogacy and Adoption Considerations

13:33 Community Support and Resources

15:39 Conclusion and Call to Action

Key Points:

1. Introduction to Pride Month 
   • Overview of the significance of Pride Month.
   • Brief discussion on the recent uptick in divorce and separation cases.
2. Legal Landscape for Same-Sex Couples 
   • Examination of the laws applying to same-sex marriages in North Carolina.
   • Challenges faced by same-sex couples regarding asset division, spousal support, and custody.
3. Recent Court of Appeals Case 
   • Analysis of a recent case involving custody and child support for a non-biological parent in a same-sex relationship.
   • Discussion on the legal interpretation of “mother” and “father” in child support statutes.
4. Common Law Marriage and Custody 
   • Explanation of common law marriage and its non-recognition in North Carolina.
   • Legal nuances in custody and child support for same-sex couples.
5. Adoption and Surrogacy Considerations (00:12:30)
   • Importance of legal contracts in adoption and surrogacy.
   • Steps involved in ensuring parental rights and responsibilities are protected.
6. Community Support and Resources 
   • Highlighting local resources and support systems for LGBTQ+ families.
   • Encouragement to engage with local community centers and legal professionals.
7. Advocacy and Legal Reform 
   • Call to action for legal reforms to ensure equality and fairness for all families.
   • Importance of voting and reaching out to legislative representatives.

Resources Mentioned:

• Local LGBTQIA+ community centers and support groups.
• Legal professionals specializing in family law for same-sex couples.
• Mental health professionals with a focus on LGBTQ+ issues.

Call to Action:

• Get involved in local advocacy for legal reforms.
• Reach out to community resources for support and guidance.
• Contact legal professionals for advice on family law matters.

Episode Summary:
In this episode, Sarah Hink, a seasoned family law attorney, explores a significant North Carolina Court of Appeals case that sheds light on custody disputes, particularly focusing on the implications of a parent's terminal illness and the subsequent legal maneuvers to ensure the well-being of the child involved. With Elizabeth Stevenson absent due to other legal obligations, Jen Bordeaux steps in to co-host, ensuring the conversation remains insightful, informative, and engaging. The episode delves into the complexities of custody appeals, the importance of timing in legal filings, and the rights of biological and non-biological family members in custody cases.

Key Topics Discussed:

• The role of the Court of Appeals and its function in the legal hierarchy.
• A deep dive into a recent Court of Appeals case from Guilford County, highlighting the challenges and strategic legal actions taken amidst a parent's terminal illness.
• The legal nuances and implications of filing motions to modify custody and intervene in ongoing custody cases.
• The significance of a parent's death on custody disputes and the intervention rights of grandparents and other relatives.
• Insights into proving a parent unfit and the legal hurdles involved in non-biological family members seeking custody.
• Discussion on the legal strategies and emotional considerations necessary when planning for custody amidst life-changing events like terminal illness.
• The limitations of wills in dictating custody outcomes post a parent's demise.

Episode Highlights:

• Learn about the critical importance of timely and strategic legal filings in custody disputes, especially in light of terminal illness.
• Discover the legal complexities surrounding custody modifications, interventions, and the unique challenges faced by non-biological relatives in securing custody rights.
• Gain insights into the real-life impact of family law issues on the well-being of children and the importance of experienced legal counsel in navigating these challenges.

Recommended Resources:

• Previous episodes on topics such as parental alienation and the legal challenges faced by same-sex couples in custody disputes.
• Consultation with a specialized family law attorney for personal guidance and support in custody and family law matters.

Closing Thoughts:
The intersection of family law with deeply personal life events such as terminal illness presents both emotional and legal challenges. This episode highlights the crucial role of informed legal action in safeguarding the future of children caught in the midst of custody disputes. Through a discussion on a poignant Court of Appeals case, listeners are reminded of the complexities of the legal system and the vital need for expert legal advice in these sensitive situations.

Reminder: For those navigating similar challenges or seeking legal counsel, it's essential to consult with a knowledgeable family law attorney to understand the best course of action for your unique circumstances.

Episode Summary:
In this episode of the New Direction Family Law podcast, hosts Sarah Hink and Jenn Bordeaux are joined by Elizabeth Barbour, a seasoned life and business coach with 24 years of experience, and the author of "Sacred Celebrations: Designing Rituals to Navigate Life's Big Transitions." Coming from Asheville, North Carolina, Elizabeth shares her profound insights into the importance of rituals in marking significant life changes, particularly focusing on divorce. The conversation uncovers the therapeutic power of creating personalized rituals to process and celebrate the end of a marriage, alongside the grieving process akin to dealing with death and loss. Through Elizabeth’s personal stories and expertise, listeners are guided on how to create meaningful rituals that acknowledge the past, heal the present, and welcome the future.

Key Topics Discussed:

• The significance of rituals in navigating life transitions, especially divorce.
• Elizabeth Barber’s journey into life, business coaching, and her inspiration behind her latest book.
• Personal divorce rituals: Elizabeth shares her experiences with two divorces and how rituals helped her heal.
• Suggestions for divorce rituals include symbolic actions like walking the Great Wall of China and hosting backward weddings.
• The concept of a "familyversary" to maintain family bonds post-divorce.
• Ideas for involving children in divorce rituals to ensure they feel included and secure.
• The importance of closure, letting go, and setting positive intentions for the future.

Episode Highlights:

• Learn about the unique and empowering ways people have chosen to mark their transition from married to single life.
• Discover how rituals can serve as a tool for healing, closure, and even celebration amidst the pain of divorce.
• Understand the impact of divorce on families and how to create rituals that honor the changes while reinforcing family continuity.

Guest Contact Information:

• Elizabeth Barbour
• Website: https://elizabethbarbour.com/
• Book: "Sacred Celebrations: Designing Rituals to Navigate Life’s Milestone Transitions" available on Amazon and Elizabeth's website.

Closing Thoughts:
Divorce, much like any major life transition, brings with it a mixture of emotions, from grief and loss to relief and new beginnings. Through the lens of Elizabeth Barber's expertise and heartfelt advice, this episode invites listeners to embrace the healing power of rituals. By marking the end of a marriage with intention and grace, individuals can find peace and pave the way for a hopeful future.

Remember: Safety first! If any ritual involves fire or physical activity, take necessary precautions to ensure a safe and positive experience.

Episode Summary:
In this insightful episode, Sarah Hink, an experienced attorney and partner at New Direction Family Law, is joined by Jennifer Bordeaux in the absence of Elizabeth Stevenson. As North Carolina embraces March Madness, the duo dives into the recent legalization of online sports betting in the state, its implications for family dynamics, and how it intersects with legal considerations in family law. They explore the excitement of the NCAA basketball season, the thrill of online gambling, and the potential dark side of gambling addiction and its impact on relationships and financial stability.

Key Topics Discussed:

• Introduction to the legalization of online sports betting in North Carolina.
• The excitement around March Madness and the state's basketball teams.
• The potential fun and risks associated with online gambling.
• Gambling addiction as a serious concern, affecting relationships and leading to financial instability.
• The significance of financial transparency and communication in relationships.
• Legal implications of gambling in divorce and separation cases, including financial disputes and the division of debt.
• The process of discovery in legal cases to uncover hidden gambling debts.
• Strategies for addressing gambling issues within a relationship, including postnuptial agreements and seeking professional help.
• The importance of financial literacy and awareness, especially for women.
• The role of financial counseling and support in understanding and managing finances.

Advice for Listeners:

• Be vigilant about the signs of gambling addiction and its impact on your relationship and finances.
• Maintain open communication about finances with your partner, and seek joint solutions to manage gambling behaviors.
• Consider legal advice early if gambling becomes a contentious issue in your relationship, especially concerning separation or divorce proceedings.
• Engage in financial education and counseling to better understand and manage your finances, particularly in the context of marriage and potential separation.

Closing Thoughts:
While online gambling brings a new layer of excitement to sports and entertainment, it also poses significant risks that can escalate into serious relationship and financial problems. Awareness, communication, and proactive legal and financial planning are key to navigating these challenges.

Overview: This episode of "Exit Strategy" delves into the risks and misunderstandings surrounding seeking and giving legal advice on Facebook. Hosts Elizabeth A. Stephenson, a family law attorney, and Jennifer Bordeaux, specializing in marketing and beyond at New Direction Family Law, dissect real examples from social media, highlighting the misinformation often spread in these platforms.

Key Points Discussed:

1. The Danger of Unqualified Legal Advice: The hosts emphasize the pitfalls of taking legal advice from unqualified individuals on social media, particularly Facebook. They analyze several examples where advice, often well-meaning, is legally incorrect and potentially harmful.
2. Legal Misconceptions: Common misconceptions about family law, such as separation regulations, child support, and property division, are addressed. The hosts clarify these issues, contrasting them with the inaccurate advice found online.
3. Importance of Professional Guidance: The conversation repeatedly stresses the importance of consulting a professional attorney for legal matters. The hosts discuss how personal experiences and opinions shared on social media cannot replace tailored legal advice.
4. Varied Legal Outcomes: The episode highlights how legal outcomes can significantly vary based on individual circumstances, underscoring the limitations of generalized advice on social media.

Closing Thoughts: The hosts conclude by urging listeners to be cautious with the information on social media and to seek professional legal advice for their specific situations.

Listen to the full episode for an in-depth exploration of the complexities of legal advice in the age of social media.

Our Guest:

Amanda Lamb is a veteran television crime reporter with more than three decades of experience and is also a podcast host and producer. She works for award-winning WRAL TV in Raleigh, North Carolina. 

Amanda currently hosts and produces a weekday morning podcast called the WRAL Daily Download. She has also hosted and produced two true crime podcasts and has another on the way. Follow the Truth was released in 2021 and won the prestigious regional Edward R. Murrow award for excellence in journalism. What Remainswas released in 2022. The Killing Month is scheduled for release in the summer of 2023.

Amanda has written and published a dozen books. Her fictional murder mystery series includes: Dead Last, Lies That Bindand No Wake Zone. Amanda is also the author of three true crime books based on murder cases she covered for WRAL including: Deadly Dose, Evil Next Door, and Love Lies. She has published four memoirs, one about caregiving and three about parenting, including: The Living Room, I Love You to God and Back, Girls Gone Child, and Smotherhood, and two children’s books, I Love You to God and Back and We Are Not the Same. Amanda writes a monthly blog on WRAL’s website called “Go Ask Mom.” 

To learn more about Amanda and her work go to www.alambauthor.com. You can also follow her on social media.

Facebook: @wralAmandaLamb  @stagemight 

Twitter: @alamb 

Instagram: @wral_amanda_lamb.

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Episode Overview:
This episode of "Exit Strategy" features Amanda Lamb, a seasoned reporter from WRAL, as she discusses various aspects of crime and domestic violence and her experiences in reporting and authoring books on these topics.

Key Discussion points:

1. True Crime Books: Lamb talks about her books, including 'Deadly Dose' and 'Love Lies,' which delve into high-profile murder cases involving domestic violence.
2. Domestic Violence Insights: The conversation highlights the complex nature of domestic violence, touching upon its psychological aspects, including financial control and emotional abuse.
3. Legal Perspectives: Lamb and the hosts discuss the legal implications and challenges in domestic violence cases, emphasizing the difficulty in prosecuting non-physical forms of abuse.
4. Impact on Children: The episode underscores the lasting impact of domestic violence on children, with Lamb discussing this theme in her mystery series and real-world cases.
5. Investigative Challenges: Lamb highlights advancements in DNA technology and their role in solving cold cases, sharing insights from her true crime podcast projects.
6. Personal Projects: Amanda discusses her upcoming projects, including a book set in the mountains about a missing hiker and a podcast about women transforming their lives post-50.

Conclusion:
The episode provides a comprehensive look at domestic violence, its societal impact, and the role of media in bringing these stories to light, driven by Amanda Lamb’s extensive experience in crime reporting and storytelling.

Hosts: Elizabeth Stephenson and Jen Bordeaux from New Direction Family Law.

Topic: Preparing for and navigating separation and divorce.

Key Discussions:

1. The tendency for people to consider separation post-holidays.
2. Consultations as a tool for preparation and planning, offering legal advice and a "toolbox" for navigating separation.
3. Addressing fears and misconceptions about custody and financial survival post-separation.
4. The importance of individual plans and strategies in the context of family law.
5. The role of attorneys in providing guidance and representation.
6. Specific Advice:
   • Different aspects of family law: custody, child support, spousal support, and property distribution.
   • Approaches to dealing with joint property and finances in separation.
   • The ethical boundaries of consultations and the importance of confidentiality.
7. Audience: Individuals considering separation or divorce, seeking practical and legal advice.
8. Tone: Informative, supportive, addressing complex emotional and legal aspects of separation with clarity.

The episode's topic is the serious implications of violating a court order, specifically in the context of family law.

Violating Court Orders:

• Discuss common ways people violate court orders, including not following custody or child support orders.
• An explanation is that judges are not pleased with non-compliance and the importance of settling cases to have a say in the outcome.
• Once a judge gives an order, it must be followed. Even if one has a custody order, law enforcement may not get involved.

Remedies for Violation:

• If one is constantly late for exchanges or violates the order in other ways, the remedy often starts with contacting an attorney.
• Options include contacting the other party's attorney to resolve the issue without court intervention.
• If resolution is not possible, filing a motion for an order to show cause and motion for contempt is the next step.

Repercussions and Types of Contempt:

• Courts have a wide range of repercussions. Two types of contempt are discussed: civil and criminal.
• Civil contempt can lead to jail until compliance is achieved, and criminal contempt is seen as punishment.
• Discussion on the power of judges to modify custody or support orders and the likelihood of immediate payment once jailed.

Understanding Court Orders:

• Importance of having an order in place and the challenges if there's no signed order in the court file.
• Frustration when parties continue to do as they please without a signed order and the limits of what attorneys can do in such cases.

Criteria for Contempt and Costs:

• Trivial violations like being 15 minutes late may not be enough for contempt.
• The financial aspect of filing another motion and going to court is highlighted.