A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction

The first 30 days after a separation can feel overwhelming. What do you tell your kids? How do you handle a new parenting schedule? Who should you turn to for support, and what decisions can wait?

In this episode, Jaime sits down with certified divorce and co-parenting specialist Michelle Dempsey-Multack to talk about navigating those first few weeks with intention. Michelle shares practical guidance on protecting your children from adult conflict, setting new communication boundaries with your ex, building the right support system, and avoiding common mistakes that can make an already difficult transition even harder.

They also discuss why you don't need to have everything figured out right away and why taking the time to make thoughtful decisions now can help create a healthier path forward for you and your children.

Need help from Michelle?

• Follow Michelle on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichelledempsey/
• Subscribe to Michelle on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheMichelleDempsey
• Connect with Michelle on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mldempsey 

If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.

Like this show? Rate it here! 

While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Jaime and fellow family law attorney Theresa Viera, founder of Modern Legal, are tackling relocation in custody cases. As separated parents contemplate moving to a new city, state, or country, what happens to the children? Jaime and Theresa explore the factors judges consider, the impact of relocation on a child's well-being, and potential changes to custody schedules. Whether considering a move or trying to keep your child nearby, this episode offers insights into navigating the legal system and keeping your child's best interest at the forefront.

Need help from Theresa? Contact her by visiting www.modernlegalnc.com.

If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.

Like this show? Rate it here! 

While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Divorce doesn’t have to be a battle. In this episode, Jaime takes the guest seat as producer Cee Cee Huffman interviews her about her book, A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction. Jaime shares key strategies for approaching divorce with preparation and intention, covering how to initiate separation, build a strong support team, focus on what truly matters, prioritize children's well-being, and maintain emotional health. Whether you're contemplating divorce or already in the process, this episode offers expert guidance on navigating this major life decision with clarity and confidence.

If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.

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Deciding who keeps the family pet can become one of the most difficult and emotional parts of a divorce. While the law often treats pets as property, anyone who's ever loved a dog knows they're so much more than that.

In this episode, Jaime sits down with certified dog behavior consultant, family mediator, and pet custody expert Karis Nafte to explore what actually serves a pet's best interests during separation. They discuss why shared custody isn't always the best solution, how pets experience stress during divorce, and the common mistakes couples make when emotions take over. Karis also shares ways to prevent future conflict, including why every pet owner should consider creating a "pet-nup" before problems arise.

Need help from Karis? Contact her by visiting https://www.whokeepsthedog.com/.

If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.

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It’s the 100th episode of A Year and a Day! To celebrate this milestone, Jaime Davis is revisiting five conversations that have resonated with listeners over the years. From knowing when it's time to leave a marriage to understanding relationship patterns, preparing for family court, navigating co-parenting with a high-conflict ex, and finding joy after divorce, these episodes capture some of the most meaningful moments from the first 100 episodes of the show.

Featuring highlights from…

• How to Know When to Leave Your Marriage, with Kate Anthony
• From "My Relationship Fail" to Learning: Rebuilding After a Breakdown with Bryan Power
• Tips for Appearing in Family Court with Judge Brian Ratledge
• Co-Parenting with a Narcissist: Strategies for Protecting Your Children and Your Sanity
• Divorced, Not Done: Caroline Stanbury on Co-Parenting, Reinvention, and Owning Your Power

Whether you've been listening since episode one or you're discovering the show for the first time, we're glad you're here. Thank you for helping us celebrate 100 episodes!

If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.

Like this show? Rate it here! 

Is your ex simply emotional, or are you dealing with someone who thrives on conflict?

In this episode, Jaime talks with attorney, therapist, mediator, and High Conflict Institute co-founder Bill Eddy to unpack one of the most important distinctions in divorce: the difference between a high drama person and a high conflict person. While both can make separation stressful, knowing which one you're dealing with can completely change your strategy.

Bill explains the warning signs of a high conflict personality, why these individuals often blame everyone but themselves, and how they can keep families locked in conflict for years. He also shares tools for protecting yourself, communicating effectively, and keeping your children out of the crossfire, including his widely used BIFF communication method and insights from his newest book, SLIC Solutions for Conflict.

Get your copy of SLIC Solutions for Conflict here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/195005747X?lv=shuf&channelId=500&plpRedirect=mhFallback 

Need help from Bill? Contact him by visiting www.highconflictinstitute.com.

If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.

Like this show? Rate it here! 

In this episode of A Year and a Day, Jaime Davis talks with Donna Jean Kendrick, a certified financial planner, to unpack the financial side of divorce that the legal side can overshadow. Donna, author of The Divorce Money Map, walks listeners through building a clear picture of assets, debts, and expenses before negotiations even begin. She explains why financial preparedness isn't about being a numbers person; it's about knowing where to look and who to ask.

In this episode, Jaime and Donna dig into some of the thorniest financial decisions divorcing couples face:

• How to map out what you own, what you owe, and what you need to ask for during discovery
• The difference between basic living expenses and lifestyle expenses, and why it matters for negotiations
• What to weigh before deciding to keep or sell the family home, including equity, maintenance costs, and capital gains exposure
• Why alimony and child support aren't as guaranteed as people assume, and how to protect against the gaps
• How to rebuild a sustainable financial life after the divorce is final
• Why assembling a trusted team of professionals is essential

Donna draws on her own experience as a widow who discovered just how costly it can be to not ask enough questions about a spouse's investments, offering a candid look at why financial literacy matters. Practical, empathetic, and refreshingly jargon-free, this episode is essential listening for anyone trying to protect their financial future during, and after, divorce.

Artificial intelligence is already inside the divorce process: on your attorney's desk, in the courtroom, and possibly in your own search history. The question is whether you're using it wisely or setting yourself up for a costly mistake.

In this episode, Jaime Davis sits down with Diana Romanov, certified family law specialist, founder of Romanov Law, and author of Divorce Like a Boss, to get an honest, ground-level look at how AI is reshaping family law right now. Diana is licensed to practice in both California and Germany and has become one of the leading voices at the intersection of divorce law and legal technology, with a YouTube following of 366,000+ subscribers.

Diana explains what "digital divorce" really means and draws a critical distinction between open-source AI tools and closed-source platforms like CoCounsel by Thomson Reuters, which offers HIPAA-level data security. She walks through a real case in which she used AI to analyze seven years of bank records in minutes, uncovering a money trail that led from a Wells Fargo account to a Bank of America account to a Cash App, a discovery that would have taken a team of attorneys and accountants days to piece together.

The conversation also gets into the serious risks: AI hallucinations that have produced entirely fabricated case citations in actual court filings, judges who have warned attorneys of sanctions for relying on AI-generated legal research without verification, and why your own search history could be subpoenaed and used against you in discovery.

Diana also makes the case for why AI will never replace a human attorney. She explains how clients stand to benefit when their attorney uses it well, from financial analysis that once took days now taking minutes, to assisting with routine tasks that no longer run up the billable clock.

Most people going through a divorce focus on what happens in the courtroom or mediation sessions. Very few stop to think about what happens behind the scenes, and that gap is costing them real money. The person who sees your case every single day, fields your calls, organizes your documents, tracks your deadlines, and watches how clients either help or hurt their own cases? That's your paralegal. And until now, she's never been on this show.

In this episode, Jaime Davis, board-certified family law attorney at Gailor Hunt, pulls back the curtain with her colleague Liz Morgan, a family law paralegal with more than 30 years of experience working exclusively in family law. Liz joined Gailor Hunt in January of 1996 and has spent her career managing complex property and support cases, handling large-scale document discovery, and building the trial presentations that help clients tell their story clearly in the courtroom.

Liz breaks down what paralegals actually do, why financial transparency is non-negotiable in North Carolina courts, and how client behavior, specifically disorganization, poor communication, and emotional decision-making, directly drives up legal fees. She also walks through the discovery process in plain language: why attorneys ask for so many documents, what they're looking for when they trace bank statements, and what happens when clients miss deadlines or delete digital evidence.

Key Takeaways

• Conflict for conflict's sake is expensive. Fighting over a $100 piece of furniture or credit card points will cost far more in attorney fees than the item is worth. Liz identifies unnecessary conflict as one of the top drivers of avoidable legal costs.

• Your documents need to be complete and organized from day one. Uploading a screenshot of an account balance or the first page of a statement is not enough. Liz explains exactly how to submit financial records in a way that saves significant processing time and fees.

• Deleting texts, emails, or social media posts during litigation can have serious legal consequences. Once litigation begins or is anticipated, clients have a duty to preserve all digital evidence. Courts view destruction of electronic evidence negatively, even when it is unintentional.

• There is no such thing as winning in a divorce. Liz outlines what the clients who navigate divorce most successfully have in common: they stay organized, they listen to their attorneys, they separate legal decisions from emotional reactions, and they focus on what life looks like when their divorce is over.

Liz Morgan is a family law paralegal at Gailor Hunt. To learn more or to connect with the Gailor Hunt team, visit divorceistough.com.

Follow A Year and a Day wherever you get your podcasts so you never miss an episode.

For legal assistance in North Carolina, contact Gailor Hunt at divorceistough.com.

While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

What if the goal of your divorce wasn't to win — but to make sure everyone could sit at a dinner table together a year from now for the sake of your kids?

In this episode, Jaime Davis sits down with Hannah Hembree Bell, founder of Hembree Bell Law Firm and creator of My Confident Divorce. Hannah built a multi-million-dollar family law practice rooted in a deceptively simple mission: help marriages end well. She describes herself as a recovering litigator — and for good reason. After navigating her own painful divorce and custody battle while putting herself through law school as a mother of three, Hannah didn't just survive the process. She rebuilt, and then she built a law firm so that she could be the attorney she desperately needed back then.

Hannah and Jaime get honest about one of the biggest misconceptions in family law: the idea that going to court means getting justice. As Hannah puts it, a client once told her that "the last place you go for justice is on the courthouse steps" — and after years in the courtroom, she couldn't agree more. The judge is not interested in your vindication. The judge is interested in your children's well-being and a decent application of the law. Understanding that from the beginning, Hannah explains, can reshape the entire divorce process. She and Jaime also discuss what it actually looks like to keep the main thing the main thing — even when the other party is committed to scorched earth litigation — and why the BIFF method (Brief, Informative, Firm, and Friendly) is one of the most powerful tools a divorcing parent can have in their back pocket.

Key Takeaways

• Redefining the Win: If both parties leave mediation equally unhappy, that's probably the right result. If you feel like you got a slam dunk, that bodes poorly for your future co-parenting relationship — and your ex's ability to recover. A real win looks like dinner together with the kids a year later.
• Divorce Is a Tool, Not a Destination: A divorce is simply the legal mechanism by which you are no longer married. The real question is: what life are you running toward? Getting clear on that answer changes everything about how you move through the process.
• Bitter or Better — You Choose: Between stimulus and response, there is a space. How you react to your ex's latest move, how you show up for your kids, how you engage with the process — all of it is within your control, even when everything else feels like it isn't.
• You Deserve a Happy Life: Hannah's closing message is the one every woman in this process needs to hear. You are worthy because you exist. Not because you survived. Not because you white-knuckled it. Because you exist.

Learn more about Hannah's work and explore the My Confident Divorce program at HembreeBell.com

If you found this episode helpful, follow A Year and a Day wherever you get your podcasts so you never miss an episode.

For legal assistance in North Carolina, contact Gailor Hunt at divorceistough.com.

While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.