The holidays are supposed to be joyful — but when you’re navigating divorce, they can feel emotionally overwhelming, financially stressful, and deeply isolating.

In this episode of Divorce Explored on the We Chat Divorce Podcast, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan have an honest, grounding conversation about how to survive the holiday season without falling apart — emotionally or financially.

This is not a parenting episode. This is a human episode.

Karen and Catherine normalize the reality that joy and grief often coexist during divorce — and explain why boundaries around money, time, energy, and expectations are essential right now. You’ll hear practical guidance, real personal stories, and clear permission to do the holidays differently this year.

Why it’s normal to feel grateful and gutted at the same time

How holiday expectations quietly increase financial stress during divorce

The most important money boundaries to set before you say yes to anything

Why “keeping up appearances” can cost you far more than you realize

How to avoid holiday debt that follows you into January

Thoughtful gift strategies that don’t require overspending

Why co-parenting during the holidays is not a competition

Time and energy boundaries that protect your nervous system

How to say no — without guilt — to events that drain you

Navigating the holidays with: Younger children, Adult children, or No children

How forgiveness can be a gift to yourself, not a pass for others

Why different holidays don’t mean bad holidays — just new ones

How the financial and emotional choices you make in December show up in January

You are not failing because the holidays feel heavy.

Boundaries are not selfish — they protect your future and your stability.

You don’t need to explain or defend your divorce to anyone.

January will come, and preparation now creates confidence later.

Choose one financial boundary and one emotional boundary to honor this season. Write them down. Keep them visible. That’s enough.

At My Divorce Solution, we help you replace financial fear with clarity. Our process begins with a Lifestyle Analysis — real numbers, real insight, and a clear understanding of what you can afford before decisions are made.

Learn how the MDS Financial Portrait™ gives you verified numbers, expert guidance, and a personalized roadmap to protect your financial future.

👉 Visit MyDivorceSolution.com

We also invite you to join the MDS Community — a free, supportive space with live Q&As, expert guidance, and conversations with people who truly understand what you’re going through.

You don’t have to do this alone.

If this episode resonated with you, please like, follow, share, and leave a comment. Your experience may be exactly what someone else needs to hear.

Take a breath. Protect your peace — and your wallet. Let knowledge be your power.

In this episode, we cover:Key truths we want you to remember:Your simple holiday assignment:Need help navigating the financial side of divorce?Join the MDS Community

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Narcissistic partners don’t just manipulate emotions — they manipulate money, security, and your sense of stability. In divorce, that mix is dangerous: fear clouds judgment, and confusion gets expensive.

In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew (Legal Liaison) and Catherine Shanahan (Certified Divorce Financial Analyst) sit down with Dr. Onalee, an expert in narcissistic relationship dynamics, to break down what actually helps you recover — emotionally and financially — when you’re dealing with gaslighting, coercion, and high-conflict behavior.

You’ll learn Dr. Onalee’s DONE framework (a 4-step recovery process), why “trying to win” arguments backfires with narcissistic personalities, and how verified financial clarity becomes the backbone that helps you stop reacting and start leading.

How narcissistic dynamics show up as financial control, dependency, and fear

Why people stay: the real role of financial paralysis (even when there’s money)

The love-bombing → withdrawal cycle and why it keeps people hooked

The counterintuitive strategy that protects your peace: neutrality, not engagement

Why you don’t need to prove, protect, or defend your story to “flying monkeys”

A practical mindset shift for long marriages: you’re not “too late” — you’re waking up

A crucial divorce truth: you may not need to defend yourself socially, but you do need to prove assets with documents

What to do if you’re afraid to ask for financial records or worried your spouse will find out you’re preparing

Why “lawyering up” too early can pour gasoline on the fire — and what to do first instead

Dr. Onalee teaches a simple framework to move from stuck to stable:

D — Decide you’re done

O — Look at the origin (the wound/pattern being triggered)

N — No more (boundaries + detachment from proving yourself)

E — Enjoy your life (rebuild identity, peace, and future)

If you’re dealing with a high-conflict, narcissistic-leaning spouse, clarity is your leverage. When you know the numbers and have documents to support them, you stop negotiating from fear — and start making decisions that protect your future.

Dr. Onalee specializes in helping people recover from narcissistic relationship patterns, rebuild self-worth, and create healthier relationships after high-control dynamics. She’s also the host of Coming Home with Dr. Onalee.

Find Dr. Onalee:

Instagram: @Dr.Onalee

In this episode, we cover:Dr. Onalee’s DONE Method (the 4 steps)Key takeawayAbout Dr. OnaleeYouTube/Podcast: Coming Home with Dr. Onalee

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In this powerful episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen and Catherine sit down with Susan Guthrie—one of the nation’s leading family law attorneys, top divorce mediators, and a recent guest on the Oprah podcast—to break down the realities of navigating divorce in today’s turbulent economic climate.

With inflation, job uncertainty, rising debt, and shrinking safety nets affecting families across the country, divorce has become more complicated, more expensive, and more emotionally overwhelming. Susan brings 35 years of experience to this conversation and explains why fear and confusion escalate when people attempt to negotiate or compromise without verified financial information.

Together, Karen, Catherine, and Susan expose some of the biggest misconceptions surrounding mediation, financial disclosures, attorney roles, and the belief that a net-worth statement or Excel spreadsheet is “good enough.” They outline the critical need for accurate, neutral financial clarity—something the MDS Financial Portrait™ uniquely provides—to prevent stalled negotiations, runaway legal fees, and emotionally driven decisions that people regret later.

Whether you’re considering divorce, preparing for mediation, or already working with an attorney, this conversation offers the actionable guidance needed to move forward with confidence, strategy, and peace of mind.

Explore her podcast and resources: DivorceAndBeyondPod.com Use her new AI-powered episode search tool to find topics like alimony, gray divorce, co-parenting, and more.

MDS Financial Portrait™⁠ — the gold-standard tool for financial clarity in divorce

Free Financial Assessment — learn where you stand and what steps make sense

MDS Community — expert-led Live Q&A events and support

Ready to Take the Next Step?

Start with the Free Financial Assessment, explore the Divorce Financial Portrait™, and step into mediation or legal discussions with confidence—not fear.

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In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan sit down with high-conflict divorce coach and post-separation abuse strategist Jackie Miller to talk about what it really looks like to divorce a narcissist, survive Crazy Town, and protect yourself from financial abuse during and after divorce.

Jackie shares her story of a 16+ year emotionally and financially abusive marriage, how post-separation abuse showed up through the legal and court system, and why so many smart, successful women still feel “crazy” and powerless when trying to leave a controlling or narcissistic spouse.

Together, we unpack how manipulation, false narratives, financial control, and threats of litigation are used to keep you spinning — and how nervous system regulation, financial clarity, and the right support team can help you reclaim your power, make smart financial decisions, and move forward.

If you’re feeling stuck in a high-conflict divorce, being gaslit about money, or overwhelmed by attorneys, forensics, and financial documents, this episode will give you language, validation, and a roadmap for your next steps.

Jackie Miller is a high-conflict divorce coach and post-separation abuse strategist who helps women and out-spouses disentangle from toxic relationships, reclaim their energy, and stop reacting to narcissistic manipulation — especially inside the family court system.

A survivor of a 16.5-year emotionally and financially abusive marriage followed by a high-conflict divorce, Jackie blends lived experience, neuroscience, and practical strategy in her work. She is also the host of the podcast “Out of Crazy Town: Your Guide to Divorcing a Narcissist,” where she speaks directly to those navigating the chaos of narcissistic and high-conflict divorce.

Connect with Jackie:

Website: jackiemillercoaching.com

Podcast: Out of Crazy Town – Your Guide to Divorcing a Narcissist (available on major podcast platforms)

Instagram & YouTube: @outofcrazytown

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The holidays can magnify every stress you’re carrying—especially if you’re quietly preparing for a separation, navigating financial uncertainty, or simply trying to hold things together one more season. In this special Thanksgiving episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan break down how to manage holiday emotions and protect your financial stability when divorce is on your mind or already underway.

With decades of combined legal and financial expertise, the co-founders of My Divorce Solution (MDS) help you understand what really matters right now:

✔ Staying grounded

✔ Avoiding financial mistakes that follow you into the new year

✔ Keeping perspective when emotions run high

✔ Knowing what spending today means for your marital estate tomorrow

This episode delivers clear, actionable insights to help you move from stress to strategy—because clarity is power, especially during the holidays.

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Your brain isn’t wired to make you happy — it’s wired to keep you safe. During divorce, that “safety system” often looks like fear, guilt, second-guessing, and staying stuck in situations that no longer serve you.

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Rebranding Divorce: The Post-Divorce Growth Cycle—Radical Self-Care, Money Confidence, and Community

Founders Mimi Sullivan and Carolyn Bilyak of Rebranding Divorce join Karen and Catherine to unpack the Post-Divorce Growth Cycle—a practical framework that helps women move from survival to confidence through radical self-care, money clarity, and healthy relationships. We discuss why community accelerates healing, how nervous-system awareness changes your money story, and why clear financial data—not emotion—drives better post-divorce decisions.

Clarity compounds: build confidence in one pillar (money or self-care) and the others strengthen.

Regulate, then calculate: calm the nervous system so you can actually work the numbers.

Community beats isolation: safe spaces prevent ruminating, revenge-energy, and rushed decisions.

Data protects you: verified financials reduce mistakes, regrets, and legal costs.

Growth is cyclical: each pass through the cycle allows deeper work (from budgeting → investing, from rest → purpose).

If you’re thinking about divorce—or already in it—and want fact-based financial clarity, start with our Free Financial Assessment. Then use the MDS Financial Portrait™ to see verified numbers, disclosures, and your settlement options so you can move forward with confidence.

Have a question for Karen & Catherine? Email: [email protected]

Resources & Links

Rebranding Divorce — ⁠rebrandingdivorce.com⁠

Free MDS Financial Assessment — ⁠https://myfinancialportrait.com/⁠ 

MDS Community (Free) —⁠ https://community.mydivorcesolution.com/⁠

MDS Financial Portrait™ — a verified, flat-fee roadmap to divorce financial clarity

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Thinking about divorce mediation? Before you walk into the room, ask yourself one question: What exactly are you mediating if you don’t even know what you have?

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In this episode of We Chat Divorce, Karen Chellew and Catherine Shanahan sit down once again with the inspiring Jessica Frew—wife, ex-wife, mom, stepmom, podcast host, and now author of Shove Your Shoulds. Jessica shares how her unique journey through divorce, co-parenting, and remarriage has shaped her mission to help women step out of overthinking and into powerful decision-making.

Jessica opens up about:

Navigating divorce after discovering her husband was gay—and why she chose to stay married for several years after knowing.

How she and her ex built a co-parenting relationship rooted in respect and friendship, putting their daughter first.

Why letting go of “shoulds” frees us from shame and judgment, allowing space for clarity and confidence.

The power of informed, intentional choices—whether staying, leaving, or rebuilding life after divorce.

Why confidence comes not from having all the answers, but from taking action, one step at a time.

Karen, Catherine, and Jessica also discuss how financial clarity—through tools like the MDS Financial Portrait™—helps women face uncertainty with strength, whether they decide to stay married or divorce.

Knowledge is power – facing your reality (financial and personal) allows you to make empowered decisions.

Be willing to pivot – life may not go as planned, but that doesn’t mean it can’t still be good.

Let go of the shoulds – true confidence comes from action, not perfection.

Learn more about Jessica and grab her new book Shove Your Shoulds: shoveyourshoulds.com

Follow Jessica on Instagram: @heyjessicafrew

Explore the MDS Financial Portrait™: mydivorcesolution.com

We Chat Divorce is brought to you by My Divorce Solution, the #1 resource for financial clarity during divorce.

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In this Divorce Explored episode of We Chat Divorce, MDS co-founders Catherine Shanahan, CDFA®, and Karen Chellew, Legal Liaison, reveal how common financial shortcuts can cost divorcing couples thousands—sometimes hundreds of thousands—of dollars. From so-called “honesty policies” that skip verification, to misclassifying home-sale proceeds as income, to cashing out retirement accounts too soon, Catherine and Karen unpack the real impact of assumptions, missing documents, and misunderstood advice.

They’ll show you why verified data—not verbal promises—is the only way to protect your financial future. Whether you’re preparing for mediation, negotiating a settlement, or already divorced, this episode will help you spot red flags before they turn into regret.

You’ll Learn How To:

Identify the red flags that signal financial shortcuts in divorce

Understand when assets ≠ income in support calculations

Avoid costly mistakes when dividing or liquidating retirement accounts

Confirm accurate valuation dates and tax implications

Use the MDS Financial Portrait™ to model real cash flow before you sign

Free MDS Financial Assessment – discover your starting point

The Divorce Financial Portrait™ – verified data = financial clarity

MDS Community – connect for support and education

Listen & Subscribe - Follow We Chat Divorce on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube for weekly financial divorce insights that turn fear into focus, focus into knowledge, and knowledge into power.

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