What we expect from ourselves and what is reality are often two very different things in grief, specifically widowhood.

In this episode I explore some of the more common expectations we place on ourselves Vs what’s realistic.

These are things I have learnt from my own journey, but also from what i’ve seen when working with widows in my groups and on a 1:1 basis.

I talk about;

How we expect life to carry on as it was,

Expecting ourselves to have all the answers to everything,

Expecting ourselves to be mum and dad,

Expecting nobody to have a say on how you grieve,

Expecting the grief to be better within a certain time period,

Expecting those around you to know how best to support you,

Expecting grief to always look like sadness and pain.

We’re not always aware of the expectations we are placing on ourselves, they are subconscious. They are learnt from others but we take them on as our own beliefs without questioning them.

What I want to do is help you bring awareness to some of your own beliefs and expectations, and ask yourself the questions, Are they realistic, are they fair, are they kind?

Once we create this awareness we can learn how to be a lot kinder to ourselves in our grieving journey.