Feelin Weird

Ruth/Haha and I explore a challenging conversation which results in me feeling triggered (listen as we gently resolve it, through non-violent communication, and come back into a really beautiful connection)!

We also discuss:
playfulness and FUN;
DEEP depression;
hula-hooping & riding scooters;
the fear of upsetting people;
wanting SO badly to love and be loved;
being KIND;
giving advice;
advocating for my needs;
wearing LOTS of colours;
reconnecting with the child self;
"is reaction a CHOICE?";
being trans;
expressing through clothing/fashion;
SHAME;
and SO much more!

Ruth's IG: @drawn.by.laughing

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

In which I discuss WHY I believe that framing my neurodiverse brain and the way I experience the world as a DISORDER, a disability and/or a PROBLEM which NEEDS to BE FIXed is only ONE way to frame it (and is potentially very limiting and dangerous).

I discuss:
decolonization begins within (how I treat my self and my parts) (decolonizing the self);
unlearning and questioning the colonial capitalist mindset;
reconnecting my parts;
learning love and compassion;
CURIOSITY as the polar opposite of shame;
and SO much more!

This was recorded in response to a listener asking for clarity on what I said about "mental illness is a deep disconnection from the self" in a past audio journal.

Recorded May 23, 2021.

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

Shayne D. returns (episodes 60, 72, 73) on his 2-years-out-of-prison anniversary!  Shayne spent 22 years (a life sentence) in prison for murder, he's finding his meaning and NEW ways to express himself emotionally and artistically!

CW: brief talk of violence, murder, childhood sexual abuse.

We discuss:
BPD + ADHD;
the CYCLE of violence & pain;
understanding BOUNDARIES;
true crime & the FASCINATION with violence & murder;
learning to be a NObody;
PAIN as a teacher;
learning the HARD way;
the dark side of celebrity;
hitting ROCK bottom;
stepping out of the intergenerational cycle of pain by SITTING with the pain and emotions;
art, creativity, learning to EXPRESS;
finding jobs that FIT our needs;
understanding PROJECTIONS;
the spiritual AWAKENING found in the prison experience;
the desire to FIT in;
colonialism, academia, hypocrisy;
and SO much more!

Recorded Nov 3, 2020.

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

A BONUS audio journal in which I discuss my relationship with the GIANT beaming volcano of LOVE inside of me and how I've been taught to repress it and to feel shame about it (and shame about how I experience the world differently than other people) AND how I'm learning to live authentically and to LET THAT LOVE SHIIIIIINE!

Take the mask off, take the armour off, let the love in, let love shine!

I also discuss:
the PAIN of being alive;
disconnection + reconnection with self;
autism, small talk, neurodiversity; IMPOSTOR syndrome;
climate change, capitalism, colonialism as forces propelled by the disconnection from self and environment;
encountering people's FEAR;
making AMENDS as an act of LOVE;
suicide as a result of hiding myself away;
surrender as an act of POWER not weakness;
CRYING with someone and REALLY, TRULY connecting;
trauma bonding;
and SO much more!

Recorded April 1, 2021.

This is a bonus episode which I posted on the Feelin Weird Patreon (click to see more & to support the show!)

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

Two trans artist people talk about gender, masculinity, + processing and reacting to BIG feelings!  My guest was raised female, I was raised male; neither of us identify with our gender assignment (at birth) and THUS we EACH have a unique take on GENDER.

We also discuss: Gandalf as the ideal masculine archetype; reclaiming gender; men wearing skirts; crying A LOT; gender as an expression of self; dissociation & depersonalization; gender dysphoria; puffing up when feeling scared; performing gender; deprogramming binary thinking; SHAME, fear + anger; coming BACK into the body (sitting with emotions); and SO much more!

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

A gentle and intimate trip down memory lane that DEEPLY connects me with toxic masculinity (and how that REALLY impacted and harmed me).  This is me exploring what it MEANS to be raised male in a world that celebrates emotional disconnection and disregulation.

Highlights include: crying at house parties; driving a friend to get an abortion; my sensitive, gentle parts not being nurtured (because I was a BOY); fist fights; a friend dying; grief; listening to inner wisdom; reconnecting my parts; crying with men; perpetuating toxic masculinity unintentionally; reintegrating gender; performing gender in alternative ways; learning to support and nurture; and SO much more.

Recorded 7, 8, 9 April 2021.

This is a bonus episode which I posted on the Feelin Weird Patreon (click to see more & to support the show!)

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

Part 1 of "Is This A Spiritual Awakening (OR a mental breakdown)?!" (A short series during a period in my life where I am experiencing some kind of awakening/understanding of my self and the world I exist in (and aware that it MIGHT sound "crazy" to some people).  I discuss all sorts of silly/playful ideas about this idea of really FEELing everything): ideas like "maybe all this entire experience is IS a WAVE of FEELINGS and feeeeeling states?"

I also talk about: CRYing while eating PIZZA; NOT fitting into the general humyn society (and being totally okay with that (finally)); finding belonging; mental illness; feeling TERRIFIED of love; sitting with the FEELING of love; fear of the LOVE inside of me; opening up as an act of surrender; to be REALLY seen and held; fear of DEATH; my challenging relationship with my dad; Processing grief; holding my self with compassion; feelings as beyond morality/judgement; and SO much more.

This entire series is available on the Feelin Weird Patreon (click to listen to the rest of them).

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

Hillary L McBride (Therapist, Writer, Podcaster) has a HEART-FELT conversation/connection with me about unlearning toxic masculinity (harm) and reconnecting with AUTHENTIC self (among MANY other things)(healing).  I cried, I laughed, I loved this.

We also discuss: eating disorders; feminism; healing with love; patriarchy as a harm to EVERY-ONE; colonization; systems that disconnect self from self and others; therapy/counselling; understanding projections; sitting with the fear; unlearning harm through gentle connection; beauty standards; self-harm; high sensitivity; and SO much more!

Hillary's website: https://hillarylmcbride.com/

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

Blair joins me to discuss relationships with our dads, being raised male, repressed emotions, cool guys, toxic masculinity, what "success" means, being young punks, the harm we've caused, unlearning bias and learning tenderness.

We also talk music!, anxiety, depression, vulnerability, stoicism, feeling shy, masking fear, bullying, conflict, physicality as identity, feeling DIFFERENT, stress, aging, authentic connection, privilege as harmful for all, drinking, nurturing childlike wonder, and MUCH more!

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)

A Patreon BONUS episode (audio journal) in which I discuss SLOWING down (REST); tapping into inner wisdom; finding CALM, AUTHENTIC strength within; a perfect counselling experience; processing anger; and showing up as authentically as possible.

To listen to more bonus episodes like this, visit the Feelin Weird PATREON!

I also talk about fitting into a world that doesn't make sense to me; GRIEVING my childhood; feeling perpetually dissatisfied; enlightenment; xmas feelings; shedding my defensive/protective parts; spiritual experiences in nature; feeling calm; feeling SAFE; feeling agency in my life; surrendering to anxiety; bald eagles; orcas; and SO much more.

This is a bonus episode which is part of the Feelin Weird Patreon (click to see more episodes & to support the show!)

• SUPPORT via PATREON*: patreon.com/feelinweird/
• Buy MERCH: kyeplant.bandcamp.com/
• DONATE via Paypal
• Review, Rate & Subscribe on Apple Podcasts
• Instagram: @feelinweirdpod
• Website: www.feelinweird.com
• Email: [email protected]

Here's a list of EVERY regular & bonus Feelin Weird episode :)

*Please consider contributing $5-50/month to support the show (and receive ~100 bonus episodes)