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Hey kids. The phrase of the day is "financial abuse" and this episode of Sister Wives is going to show you what not to do in a marriage.

Janelle and Maddy go on a drive. Janelle is serving financial deets (FINALLY) and Maddy is serving face.

Robyn says she doesn't understand why Janelle feels she is owed money...while living in the house that Janelle paid the down payment for.

Christine lets us know how happy she is being single, even though we saw her wedding special.

Meri loves that Kody is getting his Karma in the form of Janelle. Kody hated Meri more than Meri hated Spearmint.

Robyn says the other women just don't get how good she is at budgeting while not working a day in the life of her marriage to the family.

Kody is cosplaying Rose on the Titanic.

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The gang gets together to travel 24 hours by plane ride to Spain for Whitney (and Todd's) but mostly Whitney's bday. I don't know if you know this but she is turning 40. And she is single. And she is childless. Whitney has been so busy she hasn't been checking all the Spanish men that have been messaging her but narrows in on Juan (aka El Bluro). Whitney wants a totally casual thing that involves her to message him all night, have several FaceTime calls, set up a triple date with family and friends and want to sleep with him...so casual. Whitney takes her dirty white sneakers for Flamenco round 2. Whitney doesn't pee in the hot tub but does point out Jessica's insecurities. The gals go dress shopping and Juan never shows...leaving Whitney devastated for a man she never even met.

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We get a new opening with our OG 3 lighter and brighter and our black sheep of the family Kody and Robyn. 3 Rings have now dropped and chills. Kody and Robyn find out how loans work now that Janelle and Meri are no longer contributing to the family pot. Mykelti and Tony have a Vegas themed Baby Sprinkle filled with bagels and tension. Meri wasn't invited. Kody learns all about the happenings in his family from a producer. Meri has a friend besides Just Jenn who hates Kody as much as the rest of us. Janelle only thinks of Kody when she wants her money back. Christine tells us how much she loves being single...after we already witnessed her wedding special.

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Whitney decides to take another dance class with Todd after realizing that is how she got this show in the first place. Whitney makes a love connection with a beam. Todd can totally come to her bday party in Spain...with strings attached. Whitney is excited to get away since her privileged life has been so hard on her. Glenn prepares for his room reveal and can't wait to move back in and get away from Whit. Whit reveals her relationship with the beam didn't work out so she found an extreme sports blur to fall in love with. Tap tries to get a word in and shares his mental health struggles while Whitney shouts Tal's news from the rooftops. Whitney traumatizes Todd one more time with her dating site pics while making him sit on the floor.

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Whitney and Stockholm Syndromer Todd take flamenco. Whitney can't stop bringing up Kenny and how he won't leave her alone. Whitney turns her dating profile shoot into NSFW. The pickle makes another appearance. The gang heads to Jaime's wedding where Kenny keeps getting brought up by Whitney. Tal and Jessica wonder where their paycheck is this episode and Whitney wonders why her dress is too big and alcohol keeps touching her virgin mouth.

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Matchmaker, matchmaker make Whitney a match! Alessandra Conti, matchmaker to the stars wants Whitney to ask a man to mansplain to her and take her dog to a dog park instead of just to the nearest couch or bed. Construction at Glenn's is going ok as long as Whitney stays 250 feet away from all of the workers. Whitney gets stretched and begs for compliments the entire time. Goosie Girl gets to finally go to the dog park where we meet Handy Andy, Single Phil who's girlfriend just goes to a different school and a 22 year old Simon who is totally interested in Whitney and not at all a paid actor. The episode ends with an awkward chitty chat about Whit's ho phase with the best possible audience for it. Her dad and her brother.

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This episode was classic Whit. We had a nod to her affinity for peeing in water with other people in it and then telling them about it. We have her saying she is childless...almost 40...and single. We have her being a shit friend while stuffing her face with pickles. But as predictable as Whitney is, above all else she is clueless as to why she is still single, childless and 40. Lenny becomes a shining beacon of hope and Todd has Stockholm syndrome.

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The ladies get together for the most boring flag football game of all time. Emily is feeling herself a little too much and her biggest story line is Shane and his Big Gulps. Gym drama follows Shannon and Alexis. Katie comes in with a plot to take Heather down for an instagram tag. My recap is less than 20 minutes for a reason.

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DO NOT PLAY A DRINKING GAME EVERY TIME WHITNEY SAYS SHE IS SINGLE AND ALMOST 40! Whit is unbearable in this episode. Whitney commits a misdemeanor on her niece while I can never eat a cucumber again. Also Whitney is single and almost 40. Whitney surprises her niece with a gift and making it all about how she is almost 40 and single. Whit takes the ladies on the town, and reminds them how she is single and 40. Whit shows Angie the Thore family home, while reminding her she is 40 and single. Jessica accompanies Whitney to the fertility doc for a pointless appointment while Whitney puts Jessica's fertility struggles on blast.

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Whitney Way Thore is back to making everything about her. We get a whiteboard scene for the first 20 minutes of the episode and TLC is literally working with nothing. Whitney and Hunter plot to keep her father's house against his wishes. Whitney has the checkbook, Hunter has the guitar. Whitney plans for Jaime's bachelorette and body shames her fiancé in the process. Angie shows up and continues to get shit for her drinking and being married while Whitney insists she was engaged twice. Whitney keeps insisting she doesn't drink while she drinks because she is the fun aunt. And the cliffhanger...I just can't.

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