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Today we are diving into Chapter 2 of Whitney's book that has least sold one copy...because I bought it...and its all about her childhood.

Tales are told, details are spilled and our takeaways are that Whitney grew up a rich bitch and kids are cruel.

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After a much needed week off I am back for our first official Book Clurb meeting written by our beloved Whitney Way Thesaurus. We learn about Whitney's rebirth moment and get to read about her putting the Karen that changed her life in her place by writing a dissertation to her number 1 hater. Buckle up for the start of one of the greatest literary works of our generation.

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It is time for Whitney to start her new life in Salem. She is ready for a fresh start and to find a man. Not just any man though, it can't be a Chadd with two Ds. Speaking of D, she is pissed there are no single men at the party that Sabrina threw for her so she sucks Sabrina's fingers in protest. Jessica turns up the Glam and Ashley needs to tear up her shirt. Glenn has a new nickname after his CBD OD and Jessica says to hell with her responsibilities and decides to move in with Whitney.

I'm back after the summer cold that knocked my socks off and here to recap the last two episodes of My Big Fat Fabulous Life. Whitney discovers Matcha, Her cuddle coven discovers pregnancy roulette, Buddy and Ashley discover they still can't stand Tal and we discover that Whitney's moving boxes are empty.

Come join me as I snark on this show!

Whitney invites then disinvites Jessica and Angie to her insemination, but she does leave the car running with a little pineapple snack. Whitney's BFF Maw-Bell visits and Whitney pulls out the red carpet and train tracks for a VIP tour of Greensboro. Ladies night has Whitney pouting over climbing stairs and a random guy in a hat and glasses. She takes her mojito and goes home when her dance card isn't filled.

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Whitney shows her true emotional age and Courtney the haunted doll is suing for emotional damage. The podcasters take the girls for a trip around Salem where Whitney says out with the old friends and in with the new. Since Whitney isn't able to contact Courtney anymore...per court orders...she is bringing a new inanimate object to coffee with her new friends where they talk her into moving to Salem and a busser buys Whitney a welcome shot. Whitney gets her tea leaves read and spoiler...she is going to find love sometime, one of these days, according to her vague psychic. We end the girls trip with fire and setting intentions. My intention is for Angie to watch this and throw out that mascara and eyeline.

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Something witchy this way comes and its time for a GIRL'S TRIP. Whitney trades calling her friends bitches for witches. Jessica trades in her fucks to give for an eye roll for the ages. Ashley tries to give some good friend advice to Whitney but is met with pushback and a portable fan. Angie white knuckles her rosary. We learn the number one thing Whitney wants in a man if she can't have ghost sex...he can order from the pizza man.

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It is finally time to take a pregnancy test for Whitney. Whitney plans a girls trip with Jessica and Ashley with two podcast friends. Buddy needs a paycheck to get out of that one bedroom apartment he is sharing with his wife so he is popping up left and right lately and shares that him and Tal are fighting. Whitney goes on a double date that ends in tears.

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Newly inseminated Whitney get stomped on by her 79 year old dad at a fitness challenge. Whitney thinks she is 3 days pregnant based on throwing up and wanting to nest. Angie and Karen come into town to hear Whitney talk about her daddy issues and tell inappropriate stories about Glenn. The gang gets together for Henchi's fune...and it is as cringe as it gets.

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Whitney has narrowed down her sperm donor to 3 candidates and she lets Isaiah and Jessica select the lucky guy's swimmers and add to cart. Whitney starts to plan...for Todd to plan Henchi's funeral. Whitney continues to call her friends Bitch any chance she gets. Ashley holds a womb cleansing for Whitney and Jessica and sages Whitney's....flower. Whitney kicks out everyone from her room to inseminate then invites them in to hold her legs up.

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