Gal Talk

i've got a confession to make. sorry, i meant i have a concession to make. whoops, no, sorry, i meant i have a concession stand to make, to cake. to cake or not to cake, that is the question we must ask ourselves, when so wedded to treats as our souls must partake. should we perish in delight? or abstain for eternity?

i like me a big stinky cheeseburger. that's my go to meal. a plate of gnarly smelly meat between sweaty buns and hard thick cheese. french fries? go f*ck yourself. i want spanish fries, i want nachos with p*ssy juice all over it. with a gun. a gun with salsa bullets in it, that is!

you guys like music? that sweet sonorous jam of a band playing in the hot night? well guess what, turns out that makes you gay. sorry, I don't make the rules. check your local mdma manufacturer. did you like the odezza tour? did you think that was... that was worth your time and money? odezza. am i spelling that rignt? who cares

more like misrael, am i right? because i'm sure it's pretty miserable having a rave dance party during bombing season! that's right! i'm saying what we're all thinking! news moves so fast, i'm sure this is all relevant and we all remember what i'm talking about, but i always thought it was cool, personally, whenever the nazi's blasted avicii throughout the concentration camps. it just seemed so appropriate and normal to do that.

it's the spooky season folks! we've got goblins and ghouls scampering about, waiting to reveal themselves in scantily clad clothes, showing off their big beautiful goblin breasts and their stinky butt cheeks. it'd be cool to have sex with a ghost, because i've always been into older women, plus you get to watch the spread of your bust in her hollow body, and who doesn't love a good c*m shot?

didn't make that pun during the show, so i thought i'd save us by making it the title. needless to say, we've got a magical episode for you here, so all you nerds can finally hear our hot takes on fantasy fiction. do we think it's gay? depends on how far that wand fits up my butthole, now doesn't it? let's just say that old wizard staff better have ridges on it

that's right folks, we had to do it again. why? because the novel coronavirus, that's why. oh, you didn't think it was still a thing? me neither, i thought i got vaxed enough times by that hallway doctor, with the stinky hands, told me i could get the vax or free if i gave him a kiss in the right place. can you guess where the right place was? let me pull up this doll, go ahead and point at the spot on the nice doctor where you think i had to kiss him. here's a hint: it wasn't his butthole! because he wanted me to f*ck that part, and as a rule i don't put my lips on anything i already done f*cked.

we're broke, we're sick, but we're here to broadcast. needn't you worry, darling, we aren't gone just yet. we have but more to say before the curtain draws. you ever been... you ever been so poor that the zoom recorder breaks and you have to wait until payday to buy a new one? well then you might be a redneck! you ever been... you ever been so broke you get erectile dysfunction and just shrug it off, say maybe tomorrow will be different? well, then you might be a redneck! haha oh, living on the poverty line is hard, but it's also funny, right?? beer!

sorry for the delay, folks, our podtrak p4 finally frigging totally crapped out on us. that's what you get, i suppose. gotta spend money to make money. gotta, sorta, you know broke money ain't fixin... spent money ain't broke... making money ain't spending if you broke don't fix it money. we all know that classic saying. money ain't broke so don't fix spending if you wanna make it. me? i'm what you'd call an investor molester. i find that money and i touch it, grabbing it all up, put it straight in my pants.

come with me, and you'll see, that i have a tiny wiener. right? did you sing it, in your head? try singing it in your head, then come back to me with your hot takes. what about, what about cold takes? where your opinion of something is like, kinda really chill. what did you think of the movie Contact? my cold take is that it's pretty alright. honestly, i feel like you could put that movie on, and then watch it. make yourself a drink, maybe a mojito, with lots of ice, have about 6 or 7 of those, and watch the movie Contact. you'll be feeling pretty okay, by the end of it, and that's not too bad.