Tom races against time and a fading battery charge to complete his second self haircut And Scott decides he doesn’t want his pillow to be a foot away from the refrigerator as he searches for an apartment in Manhattan.

The New York Times will no longer publish television listings, and we recall the days of just network and local stations, and the exotic UHF channels. Plus Tom’s dishwasher is broken and he wonders how his little cylindrical pals are feeling about that.

Scott hasn’t had pizza since March, but he wishes he was at Tom’s 50’s style pizza party with his cat Oliver, Johnny Mathis on YouTube and Tom’s wife Cici on the picture phone from India.

Scott takes the subway to Manhattan for the first time since March 12. And wears pants for the third time in three months. And for those like Tom who prefer to stay at home, we express our appreciation for the wonders of windows.

In our ongoing attempt to lessen your fears, we add ghosts to the list of things you need not be afraid of. Unless they’re boring ghosts, but that’s just awkward and not scary.

Buckle your seat belts because this is going to be a funny ride. Tom and Scott discover parallels in their driving history in LA. And their anecdotes may terrify you as much as it did them.

The RNC is the only place you can see fuchsia pantsuits without going to Boca. Plus the tale of tail versus tale. And Tommy vows to go completely decaf. But he’s a procrastinator, so....

Unlike the speakers on the first night of the RNC, we’re not shouting at the top of our lungs during this episode. But we are tackling the thorny issue of words that have several different meetings, as well as offering suggestions for achieving world peace.

The Republican Convention is in session and their slogan should be .”Give Us Your Huddled Maskless Yearning to be Free.” Plus, how do you fact check Montana’s claim to have the biggest sky?

The.Sunday paper. We talk about our favorite sections in The NY Times, as well as our own newspapers that we “printed” as teenagers. Tom’s Weekly Buzz and Scott’s Sports Today.