The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss Conversations

Grief After Suicide: Boundaries as Warmth—Not Walls


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In life after suicide loss, boundaries aren’t punishments—they’re blankets; clear limits keep you warm enough to heal. 

Journal prompt: “Today, permission looks like…”

Boundaries aren’t punishments—they’re blankets. Today we practice limits that keep you warm enough to heal.

A Flicker (Hope) — Relief after a clear no
Notice what loosens when you cancel, leave early, or choose quiet. Relief is data. Keep the data.

To Rebuild (Healing) — Scale it, don’t explain it
Use one of these today:
Time-box: “I can stay 30 minutes.”
Scale-down: “I’m joining by phone.”
Opt-out: “I’m skipping this one—catch you next time.”
No five-paragraph essay required.

Take a Step (Becoming) — Pre-write the line
Choose one event this week. Pre-write your boundary and put it in your notes app. Read it once before you go. Use it as needed—early exits count.

Choose-your-energy menu:

  •  Hollow (low): Silence your phone for 20 minutes. Do nothing on purpose.
  •  Healing (medium): Send one boundary text using a time-box or opt-out.
  • Becoming (higher): Remove one non-essential thing from your calendar this week.

Just for Today:
Clarity is a kindness to your future self. Every boundary you practice now becomes a bridge you can cross later when the season gets louder. You’re not withdrawing from love—you’re preserving the conditions under which love (and you) can breathe.

Exhale. Keep what serves you; leave the rest. I’ll be here again tomorrow. 💜

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🌟 For moms: Explore the $9 Lighthouse Community — safe connection, tools, and hope.
🛠 Resources for all grievers: Start here.
🤝 One-on-one grief coaching for moms after child loss to suicide: Learn more here.
📞 Need help now? If you or someone you love is struggling with suicidal thoughts, dial 988 in the U.S. & Canada, or text HOME to 741741.

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The Leftover Pieces: Suicide Loss ConversationsBy Melissa Bottorff-Arey

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