Grief is uncomfortable. Our cultural response to seeing a grieving person upset is to say something to cheer them up. Although well-intended, many of the phrases used to try to lift the spirits of a grieving person can be hurtful and confusing. In this episode we discuss some common platitudes heard by grieving people and why they aren’t helpful. Some of the platitudes we discuss include:

“Everything happens for a reason.”

“They’re in a better place.”

“It was God’s plan.”

In this episode, we reference a helpful guide by therapist Whitney Goodman, LMFT. You can follow her on Instagram at @sitwithwhit.

Hearing that a friend or family member has lost a loved one can bring up a lot of questions. It is natural to feel curious about the circumstances surrounding someone’s death. While a natural curiosity is harmless, asking intrusive questions can put a grieving person in an uncomfortable situation. In the second part of a two-part series on questions, we give support people alternative questions to ask and responses to hearing about a death that are more sensitive to the grieving person.

You are not entitled to a response or answer to any specific question, but there are other helpful ways to interact with a grieving person.

One thing many people walking through grief encounter is questions. The questions people ask can catch us off guard, seem intrusive, or even inappropriate. In the first part of a two part series on questions, we are offering help to the grieving person who may not know how to answer some of the questions they are asked. We dive into some questions that we encountered after losing our brother that we struggled to answer. We give you practical ways to prepare for and respond to questions like:

“How are you?”

“What happened?”

“How can I help?”

You don’t owe anyone an answer or explanation in grief, but we want to help walk alongside those who need help formulating responses to frequently asked questions.

In this episode, we mention one of our favorite Instagram therapists, Tiffany Roe! Find her on Instagram at @heytiffanyroe.

The cheer and merriment of holidays can be especially challenging for people who have lost a loved one. In this episode, we offer ways to honor a lost loved one during the holiday season, and what to do with traditions you have held in the past. We talk about how it is totally fine to resent Halloween, feel ungrateful at Thanksgiving, and feel lost when you have one less person to buy Christmas presents for. We also give ideas of holiday practices to continue, stop, or start after losing a loved one.

You may have heard that the first year of grief is the hardest. It is so important to care for yourself in the first weeks and months after loss. In this episode, we share Megan Devine’s “8 simple acts for an unbearable time” as a reminder to care for your mind and body after losing your person. It’s okay to ask the people around you for what you need. We offer practical ways you can ask for help. You may feel overwhelmed with emotion. You may feel numb. We unpack four feelings that are normal in the first year (and years) of grief: loneliness, anger, jealousy, and fear.

For more information about Megan Devine and her platform, visit https://refugeingrief.com/.

In this episode, Sara shares her unique experience losing her brother, Leland. She discusses her life before loss, her relationship with Leland, and how her life has changed since his passing. Sara shares some of her favorite memories with Leland and reflects on the shock of sudden loss. Just as a heads up, we talk about finding out someone has died in this episode. While we are careful to discuss the trauma around death with sensitivity, it may be difficult for some people to hear.

In this episode, Susanna shares her unique experience losing her brother, Leland. She discusses her life before loss, her relationship with Leland, and how her life has changed since his passing. Susanna shares some of her favorite memories with Leland and reflects on the shock of sudden loss. Just as a heads up, we talk about finding out someone has died in this episode. While we are careful to discuss the trauma around death with sensitivity, it may be difficult for some people to hear.

Welcome to Grief Talk! In this episode, we sit down and discuss the vision for this space. The idea for this podcast was born out of need. When we lost our brother suddenly, we found ourselves broken and feeling lonely. Our mission with this podcast is to comfort those who are brokenhearted from loss, to equip those with a grieving loved one, and to cultivate an intentional community by allowing ourselves the freedom to grieve.