It was the 1950's, The Netherlands and people didn't know much about Autism.

Born 18 months earlier than her, Carl's sister was severely autistic. She never spoke a word. For the first 3 years of her life she cried a lot. It was very difficult for her parents in many ways. Sometimes they couldn't even to find love for her.

Carla's parents wanted her to be "normal' and that meant not showing emotions, not getting angry, meeting their high expectations, being the best and not wanting much. They also criticised her a lot.

From an early age Carla was told that her sister was "unhappy child".

Highlights:

-a beautiful memory that made me tear up

-how our past shapes who we become

-why love is not enough to be a good parent

-how parental trauma can block the flow of love for their children

-she was not allowed to be angry or complain

-how she felt guilty for being "normal"

-why she chose NVC

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