CW: mass shootings. I'm back with another solo episode about my feelings about guns and cops. I'm stupid and I don't know anything so I kept it to my feelings. I touch on how if you grew up in an unfair/abusive household, this feeling of powerless and frustration is familiar as well as triggering.

CW: death. This week I talk to John deBary about the death of his mother from brain cancer. John had no emotional reaction to her passing only to suffer a mental breakdown two years later after Hilary Clinton lost the presidential race in 2016. We talk about how we both tend to repress strong emotions and how it's conditioning from our childhoods. John also talks about his family history which he can trace back one thousand years. His last name is actually Bary Bary which also sounds like how my Korean mom would describe him: "John is Bary Bary white!"

CW: Abortion, Statutory Rape, Abuse. This week I talk about my abortion in full detail by myself. It was weird recording on my own but then I ended up sharing stories I have NEVER told until this day. I talk about having sexual relationships with adults as a minor and why I think that happened and how it directly led to me having to have an abortion. I talk about this cop that stalked me when I was 16. Until we raise female-presenting children with the knowledge and power to advocate for themselves, aborton is an essential human right. Also I cry AND laugh by myself. 

CW: Child Abuse, Emotional Abuse, Homophobia. This week I talk to Ryan Marie Burdge (who also goes by Hilary Burdge) about growing up neurodivergent and queer. Ryan Marie talks about being part of the first group of children to be diagnosed with ADHD in the 80s and the abuse they went through at the hands of the adults in their community. We discuss our friendship history and how we met working in the abusive environment of restaurants and how that work brought us closer together. We also touch on dressing femme and how at times it feels like drag to both of us and share a hilarious story about the time a man catcalled Ryan Marie shouting at them "Now that's a REAL woman!" 

CW: Violence, ED, Negligent Abuse. This week is part two of the conversation with Chansophalla Nop and Oak Laokwansathitaya. Chan talks about her family's traumatic history of living in wartime Cambodia and Oak discusses recently finding out he might suffer from narcoplepsy. Oak also talks about his discovery of being lactose intolerant after a childhood of having his symptoms ignored. We discuss how being the children of traumatized immigrants we felt the need to hide or minimize our pain, and the discovery as adults that that pain is not 'normal'. Apparently it's not supposed to hurt every time you eat food. 

CW: Childhood SA, A, Asian hate crimes, Violence. This week on Hairy butthole Chansophalla Nop and Oak Laokwansathitaya discuss childhood trauma and how the recent spike in Asian hate crimes encited trauma responses from both of them. They discuss how their response to violence and harrassment might seem confusing or inappropriate to people who have not had a background of abuse. Chan discusses a scar on her face she received as a child and recently discovering the traumatic backstory. Oak discusses the strained relationship he has with parents. Youngmi discusses how her son reacted to overhearing Chan's story and how it dawned on her that children should not know about these abuses. Lots of crying and laughter. 

This week Lana Siebel joins Youngmi to discuss her life as a Ukranian Jewish refugee in America. She talks about Ukraine in a realistic way that feels authentic and different compared to recent discourse. Her family considered themselves "second class citizens" as Jews in their own homeland and thus their relationship to Ukraine is complicated. She also touches on having a narcisstic mother, how eating disorders were handled in her community, and shares a funny story about breaking her finger while running down the stairs to make sure the food delivery guy wouldn't have to wait too long! Are Ukranians and Koreans the same people? ?? Maybe??? Check out the patreon to hear our kids share their sad/funny stories!