Hardly Focused

The most important thing to know about the biggest video game release of the decade is horse testicles shrink in the cold. / A mentally ill shit-dick from Florida spent this past week mailing explosive devices to high-ranking Democratic officials. Shortly before this episode was recorded, he and his propaganda-plastered van were taken into police custody. / NBC cancels Megyn Kelly Today for being just a terrible show. / The Boston Red Sox are back in the World Series. Rightfully so, nobody invited Curt Schilling to throw out the first pitch of Game 2. Elsewhere, Mike recaps the current season of the TRM Fantasy Football league. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Chris “Acc” Acciardi, Jack Gill, and “Black” Zach Ward reminisce about their pre-Talk Radio Meltdown podcast. / Acc explains why it’s crucial that you vote on November 6th. / A woman from Pennsylvania died after pumping gasoline up her ass. Meanwhile in Florida, a shop owner has asked patrons to stop warming up their piss in her microwave oven. / Melania Trump claims she is the most bullied person “on” the world. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Brett Kavanaugh, who was officially sworn in as U.S. Supreme Court justice right after this podcast was recorded, likes beer. He also enjoys boofing, ralphing, and getting close with the ladies. / In celebration of Mean Girls Day, Lindsay Lohan will accuse you of trafficking. She will also try to kidnap your child, for free! / “Grandma No Teeth” scares off a pervert by removing her dentures. / Toys R Us should be the new Spirit Halloween. Also, corporate bankruptcy can apparently be cancelled with the flick of a finger. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

The computer on which the show is recorded has been presenting issues. Due to those, the video version of Talk Radio Meltdown is taking a break. / Jack previews Red Dead Redemption II in all of its horse testicle-shrinking glory. Elsewhere, famed developer Telltale Games is shutting down. / Somehow, Kate is dominating the TRM Fantasy Football league. Meanwhile, in Malden, two local doormats find the Red Sox’ 2018 division title banner and hold it for ransom. / Scientists studied the effects of MDMA on octopuses, because why not? / If you try to use your Prius as an excuse to break the law, then you’re an idiot. If you report for The Weather Channel and over-dramatize the power of a tropical storm, then you’re also an idiot. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Jack, Kate, and Big Red absolutely despite the Salmon Sisters Microsoft Surface ad. / Kate was in charge of an extra basic bachelorette party. / Massachusetts caught fire. Don’t light a match! / Massachusetts experiences its first shark fatality in over 80 years. / A woman gives birth in a moving vehicle. She insisted her husband film the entire thing. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

The price of school milk is too damn high! Also, Spider-Man is a game what is good. / What Would You Have Done? A couple raised over $400,00 for a helpful homeless man, most of which they kept for themselves. / Remember that time Burt Reynolds and Marc Summers duked it out on The Tonight Show? / How Fucking Dumb Are You? This candle feels like a stick of dynamite! - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Nothin’ But: According to former New York City mayor Rudy Guliani, the truth is not the truth. / Red Flag: Our Commander-in-Briefs Ronald Thump has no idea what the colors of the American flag are. / A Hero: Senator John McCain has passed away. Regardless of your opinions on his policies, he was a stand-up guy and a true patriot. / Good Things Do Not Come in Threes: James Gunn is no longer directing Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 3. Appropriately, the production is now on hold. / Blown-Job: According to the developers of GoldenEye 64, playing as Oddjob is officially “cheating.” / How Fucking Dumb Are You? Anal sex versus Mark David Chapman. Let us leave it at that. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Dog Metal: Nothing is more soothing than small dogs playing death metal. / Leavin’ on a Jet Plane: An airport worker in Washington stole an airplane, took it on a joyride and ultimately crashed it. Shockingly, his demeanor was pleasant the entire time. / All Starz: For some reason, the Smashing Pumpkins and Smash Mouth are feuding. / Brah: A scientific study reveals that behavior is significantly impacted by Red Bull and vodka. Also, the sky is blue. / Dumb News: Fox News believes Aretha Franklin and Patti LaBelle are the same person. Meanwhile, Bill Cosby believes being classified as a “predator” might affect his reputation. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Sports, Sports, Sports, Sports: NFL players continue to take a knee during the National Anthem. Meanwhile, our Cheeto-in-Chief continues to be outraged.

/ Pokemon Stop: A Taiwanese man loves Pokemon Go. He also loves spending a lot of money on Pokemon Go. /

How Fucking Dumb Are You? A Worcester man tries to plow his truck through a puddle. The "puddle" is actually a sinkhole. /

There Are Too Many of Us: Ronald Thump's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame multiplies, briefly. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com

Bless the Rains: Toto release their cover of Weezer's "Hash Pipe." Elsewhere, a U.K. Burger King plays "Africa" on a loop for an entire day. /

Wacken Off: Two elderly men escape their nursing home to attend the Wacken Open Air festival. Spoilers, though - that's not actually the story. /

How Fucking Dumb Are You? Barstool Sports' Twitch channel receives a ban after its host threatens to swat a fellow streamer. - www.talkradiomeltdown.com