When Allen's gym crush asked him—point blank—if he liked someone, he panicked. Should he tell her? What should he do if she wasn't actually flirting with him? On this episode of How To!: Courtney Martin finds out what happened and brings in Jeff Guenther, therapist and author of the new book Big Dating Energy. (You might know him as TherapyJeff from TikTok, Instagram, or YouTube.) Jeff gives Allen the tools to flirt more authentically, stick to his non-negotiables, and lean into his self-confidence.

If you liked this episode check out: How To Ditch the Apps & Actually Find a Date

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How To's executive producer is Derek John. Joel Meyer is our senior editor/producer. The show is produced by Rosemary Belson and Kevin Bendis.