Alice has an objectively cool job. She programs film festivals and gets to watch documentaries for a living. But that living is also stressful: It’s low-paying, seasonal work that provides some status, sure, but not much stability. On this episode of How To!, Carvell Wallace brings on atheist chaplain and author Vanessa Zoltan, who spent two years helping countless people decide whether to quit (or not) on her podcast The Real Question. Vanessa shares what she learned from those conversations—and helps Alice figure out how to reimagine her life (with job security). 

If you liked this episode check out How To Switch Careers in Midlife, How To Take a Sabbatical, and How To Know When to Quit Your Job. 

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sophie Summergrad. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Krystina used to host gatherings all the time. Then came kids and the pandemic, and the parties ground to a halt. She’s feeling a renewed urge to bring people together—specifically her inspiring, badass female friends—but every time she starts to plan something meaningful, she balks. On this episode: How To!’s Courtney Martin connects Krystina with Katherine Goldstein of the Substack and podcast The Double Shift. Katherine shares what she’s learned from her new project, The How To Find Your People Club, including a guiding principle: Don’t overthink it.

More from The How to Find Your People Club: 8 Ways to Embrace “Deep Casual Hosting” (So You’ll Actually Do It)

More Advice for the “Deep Casual” Hosting Movement!

A Research-Backed Method to Ramp Up Our Social Skills

A Nitty-Gritty Guide to Finding a Community That’s Right for You

If you liked this episode, check out How To Throw a Party They’ll Remember and How To Find Friends in Unexpected Places.

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sophie Summergrad. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When Kelly volunteered to be the head coach for his son’s baseball team, he was nervous. He had no formal training, but he knew he wanted his players to have equal playing time—and have fun. Which they did, until the yelling started and the season ended in a stunning loss (and quite a few tears). What can Kelly do better next season? In this encore episode of How To! from 2021, Amanda Ripley connects Kelly with Doug Lemov, author of Teach Like a Champion and The Coach’s Guide to Teaching. Doug shares some fantastic advice for commanding attention (and managing failure) that we can all learn from, on or off the field. 

If you liked this episode, check out Congrats, You Won the Olympics. Now What?

Do you have a question that requires Ted Lasso-grade inspiration? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

This episode was produced by Derek John and Rosemary Belson.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Safiya is one clumsy coffee spill away from catastrophe. A Gen Xer who hasn’t yet embraced the cloud, she stores thousands of digital files, documents, and photos on devices with maxed-out storage limits. On today’s episode, Carvell Wallace brings on Caitlin McGarry, senior editor at Wirecutter. Caitlin talks with Safiya about practical ways to delete and organize—and how we can all build healthier habits in our digital lives. 

Ready to dive even deeper? Explore these resources: 

How to Organize Your Digital Files

Digital Clutter Can Be Overwhelming. Here’s How to Clean Up.

Your Phone’s Camera Roll Is a Mess. Here’s How to Clean It Up.

How to Organize Desktop Apps

Don’t Be a Digital Hoarder

If you liked this episode, check out How To Be a Lazy Genius and How To Rethink Screen Time

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sophie Summergrad. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Sarah loves her in-laws, even though their politics send her running for the exits. Now, her daughter is starting to ask questions about her grandparents’ patriarchal, conservative views. How can Sarah raise her kid to be self-assured, justice-oriented, and open-minded—without spoiling the connection between her in-laws and the grandchild they adore? On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Melinda Wenner Moyer, science journalist and author of the new book Hello, Cruel World! Science-based Strategies for Raising Terrific Kids in Terrifying Times. Melinda gives Sarah strategies for talking to all parties, reinforcing values in her daughter, and avoiding an irreparable break with her relatives.

If you want more Melinda, check out: How To Raise Kids in a Nation Full of Guns. 

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jessi navigates life with ADHD using a complex web of coping strategies. She used to strive for absolute perfection, but feels overwhelming guilt when she forgets something or loses focus at work or at home. On this episode, How To! co-host Carvell Wallace introduces Jessi to Dr. Sarah Wheeler, an educational psychologist who specializes in ADHD. Dr. Wheeler shares her own experience with ADHD and helps Jessi chart a sustainable path forward to self-acceptance, minus the anxiety and shame.

Dr. Wheeler’s Resources and Recommendations

- Sarah’s ADHD story

- Sarah’s Substack and podcast

- More about Sarah and her work

- Joan Wilder’s site Help for Women with ADHD

- Salif Muhamane’s Ted Talk, “ADHD Sucks, But Not Really”

- Kate Weber’s Women & ADHD podcast

- You’ve Always Been This Way: “Hello, I’m New Here,” by McSweeney’s columnist Taylor Harris

Check out: How To Navigate Adult Autism and our discussion of ADHD and organizing in How To Do Housework (and Not Hate It)

How can How To! help you?? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis and Sophie Summergrad. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Psssst. You didn’t hear this from me, but gossiping—can be good for you! Our series on embracing your inner antihero wraps—for now—with a guilty pleasure: gossiping. Normal Gossip host (and beloved former Slatester) Rachelle Hampton sits down with How To!’s Carvell Wallace to dish on the right way to gossip, the link between whisper networks and safety, and the importance of leaving no receipts. 

This conversation concludes—for now!—our miniseries on embracing your inner antihero. Check out our episodes on How To Get Sweet, Sweet Revenge and How To Be an Ethical Hater. 

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. This episode was produced by Sophie Summergrad.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Our series on embracing your inner antihero continues with a look at superheroes who definitely don’t wear capes: ethical haters. Slate culture writer Scaachi Koul sits down with How To!’s Carvell Wallace for a conversation about the power of haterade—and why “hating up” distinguishes ethical haters from run-of-the-mill, establishment negativity.

Links Mentioned: 

Sucker Punch by Scaachi Koul

Scaachi’s Substack, Hater Nation

Banal Nightmare by Halle Butler

Scamfluencers

Missed our first installment? Check out How To Get Sweet, Sweet Revenge. Next week: How to gossip! (But we didn’t tell you that...)

How are you exploring your inner antihero? How can we help you? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. This episode was produced by Sophie Summergrad. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jordan is mired in a bitter war over off-leash pups at an unofficial dog park. With pro-leash forces deploying fake signage, ambush videos, and questionable zip-tie tactics in a campaign of shame aimed at her fellow dog owners, Jordan is ready to take matters into her own hands. In this first installment of How To’s guide to becoming an antihero, Courtney Martin brings on writer, storyteller, and comedian Matthew Dicks to counsel Jordan in the art of getting even. (Read Slate’s Revenge Week spectacular.)

A little treat: ⁠Jordan's pup, Ziggy! ⁠

Next week: How To Be an Ethical Hater. (Can’t wait for antihero guidance? Check out How To Be the Next Erin Brockovich and How To Confront a Crazy Neighbor (Featuring Tig Notaro).

Are you carrying a petty grudge? Don’t get over it—we want to hear your story! Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer. Special thanks to Sophie Summergrad.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kate is juggling a lot: work, kids, caregiving for an elder, a dance troupe, the PTA, community organizing. Oh, and she runs a ‘90s-themed DJ night, too. On this episode of How To!, Courtney Martin brings on Oliver Burkeman, author of Four Thousand Weeks and Meditations for Mortals, to talk with Kate about how to stop doing everything all the time.

If you liked this episode check out: How To Manage Your Precious Time

Do you have a problem that needs solving? Send us a note at [email protected] or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show. Subscribe for free on Apple, Spotify or wherever you listen.

The show is produced by Rosemary Belson, with Kevin Bendis. Our technical director is Merritt Jacob and our supervising producer is Joel Meyer.

Get more of How To! with Slate Plus! Join for exclusive bonus episodes of How To! and ad-free listening on all your favorite Slate podcasts. Subscribe from the How To! show page on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. Or, visit slate.com/howtoplus for access wherever you listen.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices