In the Wake

Founder of the Enchanted Queen Empire, Samantha helps women combine the energy of a goddess with the strategy of a CEO to create a fulfilling life and business. Empowering you to plan, execute and play in the action frequency to hit your goals through deep transformative mindset and strategic coaching.

In this episode, Samantha helps us unpack 10 forms of spiritual bypassing and why they are harmful behaviors or beliefs. She also explains why the exclusive love & light brand of spirituality is also a form of bypassing.

We cover the following points:

• What spiritual bypassing means
• How spiritual bypassing shows up on an individual & collective level
• Why the exclusively love and light brand of spirituality is harmful
• Cultural appropriation of Indigenous spiritual practices
• Ten forms of spiritual bypassing
  • Optimistic Bypass
  • Higher Than / Self Righteous Bypass
  • Victim Bypass
  • Psychedelic Bypass
  • Zodiac Bypass
  • Guidance Bypass
  • Saint Bypass
  • Spirit Guide Bypass
  • Prayer Bypass
  • Worship Bypass

Tune in for more of her wisdom and insights!

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Resources:

• John Welwood originally introduced the term 'Spiritual Bypassing'
• Samantha's Instagram Live: Spiritual Bypassing: An Enticing Wonderland of Escapism
• Song: The Cure by Little Mix

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Connect with Samantha & her work:

• Instagram: @enchantedqueenempire
• Website: enchantedqueenempire.com
• The Empire Community
• One-on-One Coaching Package

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

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Antonio Myers is a D.C. resident on the autism spectrum. He believes that autism is his super blessing as he's a high-school valedictorian, college graduate, world traveler, podcast host, speaker/writer, and disability advocate. 

"For Antonio Myers, life with autism has always felt like sitting in a movie theater. Everyone is watching the same film,  but he’s the only one wearing 3-D glasses. He says, “I am able to see more, behind the scenes, which enables me to understand more of what’s in front of me. It makes me able to see people as human before anything else which also makes me very good at compassionate grieving or just bearing with people. My very first words at the age of four were: Stop bullying my friend!"

In this episode, Antonio shares with us his experiences facing the stigmas and stereotypes of autism and breaking beyond the limiting beliefs and boxes the world put him in. 

We discuss the following talking points:

• Myths or misconceptions around autism
• How these myths have personally affected him 
• His ideas for reforming education & accessibility
• His experiences of abuse & healing
• Language preferences around autism

Tune in to hear the rest of Antonio's story!!

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Connect with Antonio & his work:

• Podcast: Tonio Time Daily
• Blog: iamtrulyholistic.blogspot.com
• Instagram: @highlypraiseworthygracemayor
• Facebook: Antonio Myers
• YouTube: Tonio Time Daily

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Resources Provided by Antonio:

• Department on Disability Services
• The Brewer Foundation
• Inclusion 2021 Conference
• Included. Supported. Empowered.
• Article about the DSP Academy

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Song: My Feet Keep Dancing by Chic

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

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Amanda is a Civil Mediator and Conflict Resolution Specialist. She loves sticky, seemingly unsolvable problems. She uses tools like Dispute Specific Conflict Coaching,  Online Mediation and Open Dialogue to help people have healthy conversations, set boundaries and resolve issues. When she isn't working you can find her exploring the woods of the Pacific Northwest with her kids and her dog.

In this episode, Amanda shares her tips and tools to having productive, healthy conversations when in conflict and difficult situations. She walks us through different scenarios and provides examples of what our immediate response may be during the conflict vs. what we can say instead to course-correct and engage in a more appropriate and helpful way. 

We cover the following topics:

• How unresolved conflict impacts us both physically & emotionally
• How to gauge what is worth bringing up & hashing out VS. when to walk away & let it go
• Preparing for hard conversations
• Key components of a productive conversation
• Intention VS. impact
• Tips on how to stay present & listen fully

Tune in to hear the rest of her wisdom and insight!!

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Connect with Amanda & her work:

• Website: mindfulresolution.ca
• Twitter: @mindfulconres

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Resources: 

• Listening Skills Podcast

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

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*TRIGGER WARNING*
This is a heavier episode as we speak of rape and sexual assault. If you are a survivor of abuse or sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted love one, and/or CALL the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE(4673). 

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Chidera Dimaka is a Nigerian podcaster currently living in Poland. During the week, she works at an IT firm as a service process controller. On her podcast, Rants With Chidera, she shares her thoughts and insights about all things adulthood, social issues, and self help topics. She's also a survivor of sexual assault. 

In this episode, Chidera shares her story publicly for the first time ever. After she was sexually assaulted multiple times, she found great healing in hearing other #MeToo stories. Others' stories helped her realize that what happened to her wasn't consensual nor okay and that it wasn't her fault. At one point, she internalized rape culture and the victim blaming that follows suit but now speaks out against the harmful things in society that contribute to the normalizing of rape.  

We cover the following points:

• Chidera's story & encounters of sexual assault
• The power of sharing your #MeToo stories
• What rape culture entails
• How rape culture has affected both of us
• Victim blaming
• Consent Education

Tune in to hear her story!!

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Resources:

• Book: Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
• RAINN - Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network
• We Are HER - Foundation supporting survivors of domestic abuse & sexual violence 
• Honey Is Here - Organization for survivors of sexual trauma

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Connect with Chidera & her work:

• Instagram:
  • @chidybangs_
  • @rwcpodcast
• Podcast: Rants With Chidera - RWC Podcast

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If you liked this episode and are craving more conversations like this, here are some follow up episodes of In the Wake with Whytli to relisten to:

• Episode 70 - Sexual Assault, Consent Education, & Victim Blaming with Katie McMahon
• Episode 66 - Racism Within Rape Culture with Cheyenne Tyler Jacobs
• Episode 54 - Hope & Healing After Sexual Assault with Kristine Irwin
• Episode 34 - Rape Culture & Myths with Laura W.

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show

Fluent in French and English, Areena Antoine was born in Mauritius Island and grew up in Vancouver, BC. Areena is an undergraduate Sociology student at the University of British Columbia. Sociology has helped Areena discover her passion for women's rights. After her studies, she hopes to become a lawyer specializing in human rights. 

In her free time, she is a mentor with Go Girls helping young girl’s build confidence and self-awareness to thrive. Passionate and dedicated, Areena is the host of Self-Love Lounge Podcast -- a platform for empowered women to empower others. 

In this episode, Areena and I dive into her self growth journey and talk about the fluctuating nature of self love. We discuss the sometimes ugly, hard, and messy sides to self care and why it's important to embrace the constant evolution of self through it all.

We discuss the following:

• What self love means to her
• Balancing self discipline & grace within your self care routine
• The turning point that set her onto her self love journey
• Hard truths of self love
• Responding to relationship dynamics that resist your growth & change

Tune in to hear more of her story and insight!

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Connect with Areena & her work:

• Podcast: Self Love Lounge
  • Whytli's Interview on Self Love Lounge: Episode 8 - #MeToo
• Instagram: @selflovelounge_

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Songs:

• Six Feet Under by Billie Eilish
• All I Want by Olivia Rodrigo

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If you liked this episode and are craving more conversations like this, here are some follow up episodes of In the Wake with Whytli to relisten to:

• Episode 82 - Self Compassion and Softening Your Inner Critic
• Episode 62 - Rewriting the Stories We Tell Ourselves with Sabrina Pierotti
• Episode 59 - Setting Personal Boundaries with Raven Robinson
• Episode 53 - Limiting Beliefs and Intentional Happiness with Julie Leonard
• Episode 41 - Breaking Your Destructive Cycles

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show

Hawa Stephens is a former party girl who has overcome toxic relationships, lack of confidence, feeling unworthy,  letting go of others expectations, and not being afraid to go after her dreams. She has a podcast called The Self Love Tribe that helps ambitious females go for it with relatable topics and discussions. She loves helping women learn how to love themselves and build confidence.

In this episode, Hawa shares the experiences that led her to make a drastic shift in her life where she started to prioritize her needs, set personal boundaries, and know her worth. 

In this back and forth conversation, we discuss the following:

• The shameful messages around self care & prioritizing yourself
• Setting personal boundaries as a form of self care
• What self love and self care mean to Hawa
• How she shows up to her life differently ever since prioritizing her needs
• Knowing your worth and what you deserve

Tune in to hear the rest of this conversation and insight!!

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Song: Soulmate by Lizzo

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Connect with Hawa & her work:

• Instagram: @slflovetribe
• Podcast: The Self Love Tribe

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If you liked this episode and are craving more conversations like this, here are some follow up episodes of In the Wake with Whytli to relisten to:

• Episode 82 - Self Compassion and Softening Your Inner Critic
• Episode 62 - Rewriting the Stories We Tell Ourselves with Sabrina Pierotti
• Episode 59 - Setting Personal Boundaries with Raven Robinson
• Episode 53 - Limiting Beliefs and Intentional Happiness with Julie Leonard
• Episode 41 - Breaking Your Destructive Cycles

//
Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show

Dr. Nazanin Moali is a licensed clinical psychologist and a  certified Sex Therapist. Her private practice is located in Torrance and she specializes in working with couples and individuals struggling with issues of sex and intimacy.
 
Dr. Moali hosts a weekly podcast called Sexology introducing the most intriguing findings in psychology of sex and intimacy.  Sexology podcast was launched four years ago and it has over 60,000 downloads per month and It has been listened to in over 82 countries. 

In this episode, Dr. Moali shares how she's been on both ends as the client and now the therapist -- she went to see a sex therapist with a partner and after it changed her life, she became interested in specializing in sex therapy herself. We unpack the harmful and shameful messaging women generally receive around sex and how that negatively affects their sexuality, sex lives, and self image. We also discuss the importance of sex and consent education when developing a healthy sexual relationship. 

We cover the following topics:

• How she got into this line of work & being on the receiving end of sex therapy
• Stigmas & shameful messaging around sex & sexuality
• What our current sex education is generally lacking
• Talking about sex & consent with your children
• Cultivating & embracing your sexual self 
• Feeling empowered to find pleasure

Tune in to hear more wisdom from the Dr. herself!!

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Connect with Dr. Moali & her work:

• Podcast: Sexology
• Website: oasis2care.com
• Instagram: @sexologypodcast

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Additional In the Wake Podcast Episodes:

• Episode 11 - Teaching Consent to Kids & Teens
• Episode 37 - Body Shaming, Modesty, & Puritan Culture with Angelina Hill
• Episode 70 - Sexual Assault, Consent Education, & Victim Blaming with Katie McMahon

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show

*TRIGGER WARNING*
This is a heavier episode as we speak of sexual abuse, childhood trauma, and incest. If you are a survivor of abuse, incest, or sexual assault, please listen with caution or skip this episode entirely. The last thing I would want is for hearing these things to set you back in your healing journey or trigger negative thoughts or emotions. Please practice self care, reach out to a trusted love one, and/or CALL RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800.656.HOPE (4673) or TEXT their Live Chat here.

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Author and filmmaker Annie Margis is a childhood incest victim working to give millions of victims a voice by wiping out the taboo against talking about incest. In 2012, with the support of a cadre of volunteers, she created a helpline where adult victims from around the world connect with fellow survivors and share their stories. Having heard thousands of tragic personal histories, Annie is a front-line expert on the life-long impact of childhood incest. 

In this episode, Annie shares her story and how her abuse affected her entire childhood. She describes childhood incest and abuse as "the #MeToo that's still taboo." Through writing her book, The Ugliest Word, she has opened up the conversation around childhood incest and shed light on the shame and stigma that drives silence of survivors. 

She shares about the following:

• Her story of childhood incest
• How the abuse affected her entire childhood
• How triggers and trauma manifested
• How stigma and shame plays a part as a survivor of incest
• Healing through writing and sharing her story through helplines
• How to respond to a survivor

Tune in to hear the rest of her story!

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Connect with Annie & her work:

• Website: theugliestword.com
• Book: The Ugliest Word by Annie Margis
• Email: [email protected]
• Facebook:
  • The Ugliest Word
  • Annie Margis
• Instagram: @theugliestword
• Twitter: @theugliestword

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Song: It's A Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show

Last year, I had a breakthrough in therapy that led me to realize just how self critical and perfectionistic I was. After coming to terms with the suffering I was creating for myself, I began to work through a Self Compassion workbook during my therapy sessions. This workbook teaches the three components needed to build a self compassionate voice: mindfulness, common humanity, and self kindness. 

In this solo episode, I relay some key things I have learned along the way on my self growth journey. I dive deeper into the following:

• A Valentine's message
• My breakthrough in therapy surrounding self compassion
• Self compassionate motivation and perfectionism
• 3 components of self compassion: mindfulness, common humanity, and self kindness
• Rephrasing the narratives of your inner critic
• Finding your self love language

Tune in to hear more!!

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Resources:

• selfcompassion.org
• Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff
• A Mindful Self Compassion Workbook by Dr. Kristin Neff (the workbook I mentioned several times in this episode)
• The Mindful Path to Self Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions by Christopher Germer

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Song: Good Job by Alicia Keys

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• Pinterest: Whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show

Shu Matsuo Post is a successful business person in Japan, one of the most gender-rigid nations on the planet. When he got married and chose to take his wife’s name, the opposition he encountered gave him an unexpected glimpse into a woman’s world. It also gave him a taste of vulnerability, emotional connection, and the freedom he had been craving all his life.

Flowing seamlessly between his own journey, his wife’s journey, and their journey together as they struggled to break the bonds of gender limitations, his debut book, I Took Her Name, is a powerful roadmap for defying expectations and becoming your authentic self. 

In this episode, Shu shares his "feminist awakening" where he experienced a large perspective shift in his life after marrying his wife and changing his last name. He now fights alongside the feminist movement for gender equality and a dismantling of the patriarchy. Shu strongly believes that the patriarchy is responsible for the rigid gender norms that also put men into boxes and enables toxic masculinity. 

Shu and I chat about the following:

• Stigmas around feminism and calling yourself a feminist as a man
• Shu's journey into feminism
• Why the patriarchy is also harmful for men
• How he's actively fighting for gender equality and what that means
• How feminism sets men free from gender norms and societal expectations of manhood
• Commonly used sexist phrases and why they're harmful

Tune in to hear the rest of Shu's story and insights!!

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Connect with Shu and his work:

• Instagram: @shumatsuopost
• Facebook: @ITookHerName
• Websites:
  • shumatsuopost.com/en
  • itookhername.com
• Book: I Took Her Name by Shu Matsuo Post

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More Resources:

• Ted Talk: The Urgency of Intersectionality by Kimberlé Crenshaw
• Podcast: Intersectionality Matters! with Kimberlé Crenshaw
• In the Wake Episodes:
  • Intersectional Feminism with Renee Powers
  • Dismantling Toxic Masculinity with Spencer Rogers

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Song: Run The World (Girls) by Beyonce

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Follow along with the rest of my journey.

• Instagram:
  • @whytli
  • @inthewakewithwhytli
• Facebook: Whytli Rogers
• Twitter: @whytli
• TikTok: @whytli
• LinkedIn: Whytli Rogers
• Website: whytli.com
• Contact me here.

Support the show